Fake Marshfield News

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Fake Marshfield News

Marshfield, Wisconsin area (satirical) news.
(14)

05/28/2022

Marshfield School Board prepares referendum for football field dome addition after graduation ceremony endures rain. Superintendent Porter: “Sure, we could have it in the fieldhouse, but only if we built a NEW fieldhouse.”

02/05/2022

Marshfield Freedom Convoy in disarray as some protesters confused over roundabouts, others went to one of the previous city halls, and a third group encountered a pothole field. Protestor Porter: "I'm stuck in a pothole on a roundabout on the way to city hall on Second Street, and I'm not happy about it!"

12/16/2021

MISSING: City of Marshfield seeks assistance in search for 3,458 potholes that blew away like an ex-mayor's texts during last night's windstorm. Ethical Mayor Porter: "We need to get the potholes restored. The suddenly-smooth roads are setting false expectations."

Address

555 Rusty Waters Avenue
Marshfield, WI
54449

Telephone

(715) 555-1212

Website

https://www.hubcitytimes.com/2016/07/12/fake-marshfield-news/

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Videos

Marshfield political group hires Cyber Ninjas to consult in ongoing dispute over claimed fraudulent votes from Columbia Park squirrels. Election Strategist Porter: "We are also testing ballots for the presence of acorns and oak leaves. The election was stolen!" #fakemarshfieldnews

Marshfield to host inaugural "Wildflower Appreciation, Liberation, and Propagation Celebration" in July. Check back for information, which is currently in deliberation. #imitationmarshfieldnews

Thingamabobber Refuge and Tourist Attraction

Donations sought for Marshfield Thingamabobber Refuge and Tourist Attraction. Fundraiser Porter: "To be clear, this is for Thingamabobbers, not Doodads or Watchamacallits. Phase 1 costs are estimated at a modest $7,454,401.42, and we appreciate your support." #fakemarshfieldnews

"Mashfield Council Meeting 9-15-1981"

Buy tickets now for The Marshfield Political Theater Company's production of 'City Council Meeting: Sept. 15, 1981.' Director Porter: "This meeting had it all! Citizens comments! A presentation on wastewater! A motion! And a second!!! You will leave spellbound." #fakemarshfieldnews #whatelseyagottodo

Marshfield Computers Hacked

Marshfield computer systems are hacked after it is leaked that all city admin passwords are Porter54449. IT Director Porter: "We thought we were secure, but maybe 'Munsey' for pet's name and 'pothole construction' for favorite hobby were bad choices." #fakemarshfieldnews #deleteddatascandal

Mayor on the Radio

BREAKING: Live footage of Mayor Porter on WDLB's insight.

Pickled Egg Power Plant

Marshfield Utilities partners with Hewitt's Sceeter & Otis' Village Inn in new alternative energy venture. Renewables Director Porter: "A pipeline to capture the pickled egg byproduct will run directly to the power generator at the wastewater treatment plant, providing enough energy for half of Marshfield." #fakemarshfieldnews

Radio Superspreader

Jeff 'Litigation Cannon' Porter source of lawsuit superspreader event. Legal Epidemiologist Anthony Porter: "Legal troubles for both Mayor Porter and Police Chief Porter... Coincidence? Do the research! They were both frequent radio guests on Insight!" #fakemarshfieldnews

Burritos + Cows = Not Good

Methane explosion levels Marshfield area dairy farm after TikTok video shoot featuring cows being fed Taco Bell bean burritos goes horribly wrong. Teen Porter Twins: "Our hope was to go viral. We succeeded beyond our wildest expectations!" #fakemarshfieldnews #poorlittlecows