The Snicker Sheet

01/12/2025

JOKE OF THE DAY: Three men die on Christmas Eve and go to heaven. Before they’re allowed to enter the gates, they’re greeted by Saint Peter. He tells them there are rules before he allows them in.

“In order to get into heaven, you must each produce something that represents Christmas and the holiday season.”

The first man digs deep into his pockets and pulls out a match. He lights it.

“This is to represent a candle of hope,” he says.

Impressed, Peter lets him in.

The second man pulls out a set of keys and shakes them in Peter’s face.

“This represents the sound of Christmas bells,” he says.

Peter also allows him to enter.

When it’s the third man’s turn, he pulls out a pair of red panties.⬇️

01/12/2025

BREAKING: Elon Musk Drops Bombshell, Publishes Diddy And Epstein’s Client List: “We’re Exposing Everything” check comment 👇👇

01/12/2025

I CAUGHT MY DAD WITH A YOUNG LADY ON THE BEACH WHILE HE WAS "ON A BUSINESS TRIP."

My friend and I just got to the beach when I spotted a familiar face — my dad. At first, I thought he was there with my mom, but nope. Next to him was a girl way younger than me!

I called my mom and casually asked where Dad was, and she said, "He's on a business trip in New York, sweetie."

I hung up the phone and immediately sent my mom a pic of my dad with that girl.

A few minutes later, my mom called me back, and what she told me left me speechless. It turned out that she knew that young woman. ⬇️

01/12/2025

My name is Victoria, and after 65 years, I can confidently say that I've had a blessed and joyful life. My husband passed away a few years ago, and since then, it's just been me and the two beautiful souls we brought into this world — our children.

As Christmas approached, I felt a surge of worry. I wrote to my children, inviting them to come over. I didn't want to hear their voices through a phone line; I wanted to hug them and share all the stories I'd been saving!

To make it all happen, I started working as a cleaner at a furniture store in the mall. It's not glamorous, but it's honest work, and I was proud to be able to pay my bills and even buy presents for everyone. Or so I thought — until the day my kids found out.

They were angry, and after that, they avoided talking to me entirely. Still, I held onto hope. I thought, I'll see them at Christmas and explain everything. But as the days passed, the silence from them cut deeper than any words could have.

On Christmas Eve, I was over the moon with excitement. Each car sound made my heart leap, but with every passing hour, the hope in my heart began to fade. I started to worry as I stared at the empty chairs around the dining table.

I called them several times, but they didn't answer... Slowly, it dawned on me that I might spend this special day alone, just like so many others. But then, the doorbell finally rang.👇

01/12/2025

ON MY WAY TO WORK, I FOUND AN ELDERLY WOMAN FROZEN IN A SNOWDRIFT – SHE HAD A NOTE FOR ME

It was a freezing January morning when I spotted something slumped near the edge of my driveway. At first, I thought it was trash, but as I got closer, I realized it was an elderly woman. Her lips were blue, her coat way too thin for the weather, and she looked barely alive.

"Ma'am, can you hear me?" I asked, panicking as I reached for my phone.

Her eyes fluttered open, and in a faint whisper, she said, "No… don't… note for you."

"Note?" I asked, confused. She weakly pointed to her coat pocket.

I hesitated but reached in and pulled out a small, weathered envelope. My name, Amy, was scrawled on it in shaky handwriting. My heart raced. How did this stranger know my name?

I opened the note with trembling hands.

01/12/2025

Rest in peace. 🙏🕊️ Jeff Baena, writer-director and actress Aubrey Plaza's partner of 14 years, was found dead by his assistant at home. Official details in the comments. 👇

01/11/2025

"GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE WITH THAT BABY! That boy is not my son's blood! He looks nothing like my son!" Susan yelled at her daughter-in-law, Abbie, as she came home from the hospital with little Timothy.

"Susan!" Abbie yelled back, teary-eyed. "How could you say such a thing? He's your grandson... Jonathan," she said, turning to her husband, but the man didn't utter a word. So poor Abbie packed her belongings and left Susan's home.

8 years later, after dropping Timothy off at school, Abbie was on her way to work when she noticed an elderly woman dumpster diving for food.

Abbie reached into her handbag for cash and got out of the car to offer it to the woman. But as she got closer, she recognized the woman's coat. When the homeless woman turned around to face her, Abbie's suspicions were confirmed.

"Good Lord! Susan?" she whispered in disbelief at seeing her mother-in-law in such a terrible condition. 😳👇

01/11/2025

Devastating PALISADES FIRE continues to rage in Los Angeles, leaving countless homes damaged or destroyed. 💔 The LIST of ESSENTIAL STEPS to take for those affected is in the comments. 👇

01/11/2025

GYM OWNER’S DAUGHTER MOCKED ME AND MY APPEARANCE NOT KNOWING HER FATHER WAS STANDING BEHIND HER

HER: "I was in line for this treadmill first!"

ME: "That's not true. I've been waiting here for 15 minutes, and you weren't even around. You just walked out of the locker room."

Then I had to endure a barrage of insults directed at me, from comments about my body to judgments about my face. I don't even want to list the "COMPLIMENTS" that were thrown my way.

Honestly, her words hit hard. As a kid, I was in a car accident that left scars on my face — something I've carried my whole life. I'm sure she didn't know that, but she also didn't know that a gray-haired man in a black suit was standing right behind her and it was HER FATHER ⬇️

01/11/2025

Four years have passed since my husband disappeared without a trace. He set out on a solo hike in the mountains, and no one has seen him since. Those years were incredibly hard for me and our two kids. Over time, we adjusted to life without him, even though we still think about him a lot.

Then, one day out of nowhere, something crazy happened. I was lying on a blanket in our backyard when my husband's dog (whom I haven't seen for four years because he disappeared with my husband) ran into our yard — with my husband's jacket in its mouth. The very same jacket he'd worn on that hike!

I tried to get closer to the dog, but it took off running. I followed, running for about 20 minutes until we ended up in the woods not far from our neighborhood.

I kept chasing the dog until I couldn't run anymore and suddenly came across an old cabin hidden in the forest. I slowly walked up to it and finally worked up the nerve to open the door. ⬇️

01/11/2025

MY 13-YEAR-OLD SON STARTED STAYING LATE AFTER SCHOOL — I WENT TO CHECK WHY AND SAW HIM GETTING INTO A CONVOY OF BLACK SUVS.

I'm raising my son on my own. He's never had a father around, and I never remarried.

My Kyle's always been a wild, energetic kid. He's either out playing sports or creating something with his friends. But recently, things got… strange. He barely spends any time at home now. I'd ask him what he's up to after school, and he'd just say he's doing music with friends or playing soccer.

Then one day, while cleaning his room, I found a stash of expensive gadgets and stacks of cash under his bed! We've never had the kind of money for brand new smartphones, laptops, or tablets!

When he got home, I pretended I hadn't seen anything, but the next day, I parked near his school after classes to see what he was really up to.

Then, out of nowhere, a convoy of sleek black SUVs pulled up. My Kyle walked out of the school and got into one of the cars! I followed them.

Ten minutes later, we arrived at this huge mansion, and I watched as my son walked in with two men in suits. I got out of the car, walked up to the gate, and rang the doorbell.⬇️

01/11/2025

01/10/2025

Police believe the Kenneth fire was "PURPOSELY SET." 🫢 The suspect has been taken into custody. VIDEO of his detention in the comments. 👇

01/10/2025

Rest in Peace. 🙏 Rodney Nickerson refused to leave his family home, says his daughter Kimiko. She last spoke to him around 9:30 PM. The FULL STORY is in the comments. 👇

01/10/2025

Details on Jessica Alba's divorce from the man who WAS BY HER SIDE FOR 20 YEARS are in the comments. 👇

01/10/2025

I always knew I was adopted—my dad told me when I was three. My adoptive mom passed away just six months later, and I don't really remember her, just her warm smile. After that, it was just me and Dad.

But growing up wasn't easy. My dad constantly reminded me I wasn't really his. Anytime I struggled, he'd say things like, "Maybe you got that from your real parents" or "You're lucky I even kept you."

When I was six, he told a group of neighbors I was adopted, loud enough for everyone to hear. By the next day, the kids at school were calling me the "orphan girl." The teasing never stopped, and when I came home crying, Dad just said, "Kids will be kids." He even took me to orphanages on my birthdays to show me how "lucky" I was compared to the kids there.

For 30 years, I lived believing I'd been abandoned, that I was a burden. My fiancé, Matt, was the first person to encourage me to dig into my past. "Maybe finding out more about your biological parents could bring you some closure," he said.

At first, I resisted—what was the point? But eventually, I gave in, and a few weeks ago, we went to the orphanage my dad always said I came from. When we got there, the woman at the desk checked the records and said, "I'm sorry, but there's no record of you here." My heart sank.

Confused and shaken, we went straight to my dad's house. As soon as he opened the door, I blurted out, "We went to the orphanage—they've never heard of me. Why did you lie?" He froze. "I knew this day would come," he muttered. Then, slowly, he began to confess. ⬇️

01/10/2025

Chrissy Teigen & John Legend escaped the California wildfires with their 4 kids & pets. ❤️‍🩹 Photos that OUTRAGED users are in the comments. 👇

01/10/2025

I WENT TO PICK UP MY WIFE AND NEWBORN TWINS FROM THE HOSPITAL — I ONLY FOUND THE BABIES AND A NOTE.

I can't explain the excitement I felt as I drove to the hospital to bring Suzie and our newborn twin daughters home. I had spent the past few days decorating the nursery, cooking a big family dinner, and planning the perfect welcome. I even picked up balloons on the way. But when I arrived, my excitement turned into confusion.

Suzie wasn't there. I just found our two sleeping daughters and a note.

My hands shook as I unfolded it: "Goodbye. Take care of them. Ask your mother WHY she did this to me."

I froze, rereading it over and over. What the hell did this mean? Where was Suzie?

I asked the nurse, my voice trembling. "Where's my wife?"

"She checked out this morning," the nurse said hesitantly. "She said you knew."

Knew? I had no clue. I drove home with the twins, my mind racing, replaying every moment of Suzie's pregnancy. She seemed happy — or was I blind?

When I got home, my mom was there, smiling and holding a casserole. "Oh, let me see my grandbabies!"

I pulled back. "Not yet, Mom. What did you do to Suzie?" ⬇️