The Bo Paul Project

11/06/2024

Let’s talk triggers.

Grief is a weird place. A place where both immense love and sadness coincide.

Eleven months into my grief journey and it’s brought out emotions in me that I never knew could exist.

Each person experiences grief differently. Different stages, different coping mechanisms, different triggers, etc. Before we lost Bo, I was familiar with there being different stages of grief…but I had no idea the depth behind them. I had never lost anyone very close to me, therefore, I had never had to walk this path. Something that I was NOT aware of, were the triggers associated with losing someone you love.

Triggers can come in many forms…A scent, a piece of clothing, a song or sound, places. There is no list, it varies for each person. For me personally, one that I never expected to be a trigger is someone chewing gum loudly. The night we found out Bo was gone it felt like an eternity was passing while our nurse tried to find his heartbeat. The room was very silent and I just remember listening to the sound of her chewing her gum. Not that this was ever anything that would have bothered me in the past or I would have ever even noticed…but my mind was hyper-focusing on every sound, praying to hear a heartbeat, but all I could hear was gum chewing.

It was months later before I realized this was a trigger for me. Someone close to me was chewing gum and popping bubbles and I had to step away from them. It came out of nowhere and it hit me like a ton of bricks. My chest immediately felt heavy and I couldn’t breathe, my eyes were burning, I started sweating, I couldn’t focus on the conversation and needed to leave. I was taken right back to that night, that moment…just that easily.

Was this their fault? Absolutely not. Other people are not responsible for your triggers, though expressing your feelings to them and helping them understand is a great way cope and work past the anxiety around your triggers.

Communication and expression during your grief journey is so important. Whether that be with a therapist, a family member, a friend, or even journaling (my personal favorite)…so tell me, what’s something you have experienced on your journey that you never thought would be a trigger?

-Shannon, Grief Counseling Specialist 🤍

10/28/2024

Last Friday Justin and I officially partnered with Columbus Regional Health and made our largest donation yet!

I have been working with CRH for the last couple of months on donating Bo Bears and CuddleCots. They had one request, and that was that it would be so nice to have a smaller bassinet for more preterm babies than what comes standard with the traditional CuddleCot setup. So after a lot of research and my husband’s “can do” engineering attitude / mind, we were able to locate and create two new bassinets that fit with the CuddleCot cooling system.

One bassinet is a perfect fit for babies born at term or near term, 35 weeks and beyond. The second bassinet is ideal for babies born preterm, 35 weeks and earlier.

Overall, we were able to donate 2 custom sized bassinets with bedding, a rocking stand, the full CuddleCot package and original bassinet, extra mats and a lifetime warranty on the full system.

We also provided a year’s worth of Bo Bears to their facility (based off of their statistics) and trained employees on how to fill and present them to grieving families.
What made this delivery even sweeter? Our example bear was a perfectly created 5lb 7.5oz bear made special for a mother on their team who is missing her son every day. She got to take this bear home to her family and especially her sweet daughter!

We have put so much work into our foundation and I am so proud of how far we are branching out and the families we are able to reach.

Thank you CRH, for allowing us the honor of partnering with you to reach more families and the ability to provide the gift of time with their angel.

If you or someone you know is aware of a facility that could benefit from these items, please reach out to us and we would be happy to discuss information with them.

All our love, Justin, Shannon, Libby and Bo 🤍

05/01/2024

This is a heart breaking story. If you have a spare dollar, please considering donating to this beautiful family. Sharing this link would also be a great help for them.

Hi my name is Kecia and my step sister Amanda and her husband gave birth to their beautiful baby boys… Kecia Vant Hof needs your support for Eli & Easton Reed

04/12/2024

Shortly after Bo was born, I remember one of our nurses asking if we wanted to have any pictures done of him. This is something I’m so glad they were so kind in offering to us. He was given his first bath, we brushed his hair, and carefully picked from the dozen perfectly matched outfits I had packed…this one was supposed to be his coming home outfit.

They asked us if there were any special items we wanted photographed with him.
“A lot of families use their wedding rings, special jewelry, etc.” our nurse said. Immediately we knew we wanted my Saint Christopher included. This necklace was the one Justin was wearing the night of his accident that I had worn religiously every day since. We both wear one.

“Saint Christopher, holy patron of travelers, protect me, and lead me safely to my destiny”

The other item was his teddy bear. Though it didn’t have any significant meaning at the time, It was his and I wanted to remember him with it.

The following weeks after losing him, there was so much grief…followed by immense anger. Many people tried to provide comforting words…none to which I wanted at the time.
“There’s a reason for everything, God just needed him more” those words struck me with more anger than anything else. “No. Tell me why anyone else needed my son more than I did” I couldn’t find the reason.

I kept searching for my purpose, I always felt it was being a mother and I had failed that…I felt like I didn’t know what I was made for anymore.

The last 3 years have been challenging to say the least and I kept pleading with God “Why…do you even hear me?” But now I know…he did hear me and he was leading me through all of this to my purpose, I just had to find it in his small clues. The necklace, his bear, his nickname…it all tied together, too much to just be coincidence. It’s funny how such small things can feel like they all come full circle.

So now when people tell me there’s a reason for everything, I’ll smile, nod and agree…but I’ll know that God actually means “give it a reason, find it”

Trust in his plan, no matter how much it hurts or how much you can’t understand it. You will find your reason…and it will bring you so much peace one day.

Bo is my reason. My family is my reason.

04/08/2024

1lb 6oz carefully weighed out into 3 bears to ship to a special family whose sweet babe fought for 3 beautiful days before God called him home.

For baby Finley 💙

03/27/2024

This evening Justin and I delivered a bear to a hospital for a little boy called home too soon.

We pray over every bear before we deliver them, during that prayer I thank God for choosing us to be Bo’s parents and leading us to our calling in life.

While I hope to be bringing a small amount of comfort to grieving families, I realize my face isn’t the one they ever hoped to see coming through those hospital doors.

I know how special these bears are and the peace they can provide to families….but sometimes I have to stop and remind myself of that, because this journey is hard. It’s hard to stay strong at times, when all I want to do is hold these families and tell them “I know”

There is no right way or wrong way to grieve. That’s the thing about social media, I’ve heard from so many people how well I am coping with my grief…but what they don’t see are the days I struggle to get out of bed, or the days I find a smile upon my face followed by immediate sorrow because Bo should be here. It’s picking items up off of his grave before a storm so they don’t blow away. It’s having a collection of things from stores, that he will never play with but buying them anyways because they would have been so perfect for him.

I have to remind myself constantly that most people don’t understand, and I used to find myself so angry, but now I consider it a blessing….they are so blessed to not understand this kind of heartbreak, and I hope they never have to understand. I hope I never have to deliver a bear to you under these circumstances….but if I do…I see you, I hear you, I’m here for you, and I’m always praying for your family.

As always, sending all my love to everyone following our journey…even through the hard days 💙🧸

03/14/2024

Most days you’ll see me posting perfectly put together bears ready to go to families. Other days sometimes look like driving an hour+ to deliver a bear to a family living with their own struggle and nightmare. A family that I’ve never met, but share so much in common with.

Life is delicate, time is precious. I know Bo would be proud of the impact he’s making.

Thank you to everyone who has supported our journey thus far, because of you we’re able to do what we’re doing 💙

02/27/2024

We are adding so many new “Bo Bear” options for you to choose from!
These make for such great remembrance gifts of your littles! And for my expecting parents following this page, you can purchase one of these bears with a recorder to have your little one’s heartbeat recorded in (one of my favorite options, we are so blessed to have Bo’s)

02/20/2024

For Bo ✨💙🧸

02/07/2024

EXCTING NEWS 💙💗
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Something I have found a lot of peace in doing for Bo is writing letters to him. At first I thought, “That won’t do anything for me” when it was recommended. Boy was I wrong. I felt closer to him with every letter.

So I thought, why not publish my own journal to add to our project?
Well, I finally got the final draft of it published today and I’m hopeful to have this on our website and available for families here very soon!

Thank you all again for the outpouring amount of support through our journey.
💙🧸💗

02/06/2024

For Madeline 💗🧸
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13 ounces

02/05/2024

Happy Sunday! WOW, I have had SO many requests and orders come in over the weekend for bears. It's a bittersweet feeling where joy and grief both coexist in this journey as I hear so many of your stories. The joy these bears are able to bring you and the impact our son has helped make...and grief from the heartache I share with many of you.

With that being said,
Our website is officially up and running!
You can place orders or make donations through here.

https://www.thebopaulproject.com/

Anyone can order these bears; they make for beautiful remembrance keepsakes of ALL babies, both earthside and in heaven. All proceeds go directly to donation bears and supporting local foundations.

(Please be patient with us if there are any glitches, we are still learning!)

As always though, you're welcome to message us directly through Facebook if it is more convenient for you!

the Bo Paul Project. "Bo Bears" Weighted keepsake bears.

02/02/2024

Hi!
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I’ve had a lot of new followers and message requests recently.
If I haven’t responded to you, I apologize. I am going to be unavailable for the remainder of today due to a minor surgery I had. I am going to take the weekend to rest and will be back Monday.

Thank you for understanding 💙🧸

01/31/2024

3lbs15oz 💙🧸
Another custom bear ready to go be in the arms of a very special family.

01/24/2024

Our Story 💙🧸

We’re Justin, Shannon and Libby…the Paul family! Justin and I were married during the Covid year, 2020 and knew we wanted to start a family early into our marriage. After quite some time of hoping and praying, we discovered we would not be able to conceive without medical intervention. After three months of fertility medications, we were blessed with those two beautiful pink lines! Nine long months later, our daughter Libby Rose made her appearance into this world…life felt so perfect.
Justin and I knew we wanted to expand our family but also knew the struggles and trials we endured trying to get pregnant with our daughter, so it was quite a surprise when ten short months later we saw those two pink lines again! By God’s will, we were going to be blessed with another sweet baby. We were shocked, excited and partially terrified of the thought of two under two. The waiting and planning began.
At nearly 36 weeks pregnant, after dinner, I noticed I hadn’t felt our baby move…this struck me as off, this baby was always so active. I decided it would be best to calm my nerves and go in for a simple check. Minutes felt like hours as they tried to find our baby’s heartbeat. After multiple different attempts, I feared I knew the words that were going to come next. “We’re just going to have the doctor come in to check” I called Justin and told him to drop Libby off, he needed to get in here.
Shortly after, our doctor arrived. “Justin is on his way” I said. She began an ultrasound. “I’m so sorry” the words that still pierce my heart today. I feel as if my mind and body went numb from there. "Why is this happening?" I remember pleading with God to not let it be true. We shared many tears together and she waited by my side until Justin arrived. No words were spoken to him when he entered the room, just a headshake and tears, no words were needed to know our baby was gone.

The following day, December 4th, 2023, after 8 hours of labor, Justin and I welcomed our perfect baby.

“It’s a baby boy!” Justin proudly announced to the room through tears, after confidently stating it would probably be another girl moments before his arrival.

Bo Robert Paul
Born Sleeping December 4th, 2023, at 8:07 PM

Our perfectly formed son, weighing 6 pounds 1.4 ounces and 19 inches long laid on my chest. The room was silent and peaceful. We spent the night and following day holding him, loving him, introducing our family to him and embracing everything he was and should have been. We will never have answers for what happened to our son, but we will love and miss him for a lifetime.
During our time at the hospital, we were gifted many items to remember our sweet boy, items that we will cherish for a lifetime. Justin and I knew from very early on that we wanted to find a way to give back to the community and help others experiencing similar losses while also honoring our son. During the days after losing Bo, I found comfort in items that I could hold and feel. His teddy bear ended up being that item for me, especially after Bo had quickly gained the nickname “Bo Bear” in the hospital. It helped to fill my arms that felt so empty, and still does. The Bo Paul Project vision came to life from there.

It is our promise to ourselves to always talk about him, to remember him and honor him and to give to others as they gave to us during that difficult time.

Through The Bo Paul Project we hope to provide a small amount of comfort on this journey to other families that we share this heartache with.

All of our love,
Justin, Shannon and Libby Paul

01/24/2024

Our Mission 💙🧸

Create custom keepsake bears for families grieving the loss of their baby.