12/17/2025
The police in Seattle are currently looking for a confused 72-year-old man who has likely wandered off from his home. My son, Mark, filed the report twenty minutes ago. He thinks I’m lying in a ditch, or that I’ve forgotten my own name and am roaming the aisles of a Whole Foods looking for a discontinued cereal.
He doesn’t know that I am currently sitting on the hood of a cherry-red 1968 Mustang, finishing my second taco, watching the Arizona sunset burn the sky into shades of violet and bruised gold.
My phone buzzes again. It’s Mark. "FaceTime Request."
I let it buzz. I take a bite of the taco. It’s greasy, spicy, and absolutely terrible for my blood pressure. It tastes like heaven.
To explain why I am ghosting my only child on Christmas Eve, I have to take you back to last year. The "incident."
I flew out to Seattle to stay at Mark and Emily’s house. I was excited. I wore my good flannel. I even brought my old toolbox because Mark mentioned a squeaky door hinge. I wanted to be useful. I wanted to be a dad.
But from the moment I stepped into their "Smart Home," I didn’t feel like a father. I felt like a liability they were trying to mitigate.
The house was beautiful, but it felt like an Apple Store. Everything was white, gray, or beige. When I took out my screwdriver to fix the hinge, Emily gently took it from my hand.
"Oh, Frank, please don't," she said, her voice dropping to that soft, patronizing tone people use for toddlers and rescue dogs. "We hired a TaskRabbit for that. We don’t want you to hurt your back. Just… go sit in the heavy recliner. Relax."
So I sat. I sat on a chair that cost more than my first car.
Then came dinner. The minefield.
Back in my day, the dinner table was where we argued, laughed, and solved the world’s problems. In Mark’s house, silence was the only safety. I tried to tell a funny story about the guys at the steel mill back in the 80s.
My grandson, Leo, looked up from his iPad. "Grandpa," he said, "That terminology is actually really problematic."
I froze. "It was just a joke, kiddo."
"Times change, Dad," Mark interrupted, pouring a glass of biodynamic wine. "We’re trying to be mindful of our language here. Let’s just… keep it light. No politics. No old stories. Okay?"
Keep it light. That was code for: Don’t be yourself. You are outdated. You are embarrassing.
I looked around the table. They are good people. They volunteer. They drive electric cars. They have 401ks. But they are terrified. They are terrified of germs, terrified of gluten, terrified of offending someone on the internet, and terrified of me—the old man from the Rust Belt who might accidentally shatter their curated peace.
I ate my plant-based turkey substitute in silence. I felt like a ghost haunting my own family. I wasn’t an elder to be respected; I was a relic to be tolerated until my flight home.
When I got back to Ohio, the silence in my own house hit me differently. It wasn't peaceful. It was a waiting room for the end. I looked at my "Rainy Day Fund"—money I’d been saving for a nice assisted living facility.
What if it doesn't rain? I thought. What if I just die of boredom in the drought?
The next morning, I bought the Mustang. It was a rust bucket I found on Craigslist.
For six months, I didn't see a doctor. I saw a mechanic. I scraped my knuckles. I got grease under my fingernails that no amount of artisanal soap could scrub away. I felt the vibration of a V8 engine running rich. I felt useful. I felt alive.
Three days ago, I just started driving. No plan. No GPS. Just West.
Which brings me back to this roadside diner on Route 66.
The phone stops buzzing. Then, a text: "Dad, please pick up. We bought a free-range, organic turkey this year. We set up the HEPA filter in the guest room. Please."
I stare at the screen. They think the problem was the turkey. They think if they change the menu, I’ll fit back into the box.
"Nice ride, Old Timer."
I look up. A young couple has pulled up on vintage motorcycles. The girl has bright blue hair and sleeves of tattoos. The guy has a nose ring. In Mark’s neighborhood, the HOA would have called the police on them.
"Thanks," I say. "Rebuilt the carburetor myself."
The girl’s eyes light up. "No way. Is that a Holley four-barrel?"
They walk over. For twenty minutes, we don't talk about politics or the economy. We talk about fuel-to-air ratios and the tragedy of modern power steering. They don't treat me like a fragile antique. They treat me like a guy who knows how to keep a machine running.
A massive guy walks out of the diner. He’s a long-haul trucker, wearing a cap that says Grind Hard. He looks at the car, then at me.
"Haven't heard an idle that rough since the 90s," he grins. "She runs a little hot?"
"Don't we all," I say.
He laughs, clapping a hand on my shoulder. It feels heavy and real.
Here we are. A white retiree, a black trucker, and two punk-rock Gen Z kids. We aren’t walking on eggshells. We aren't checking our social credit scores. We are just Americans, standing under the vast desert sky, connected by the simple love of a machine built to last.
My phone rings again. Video call.
I take a deep breath. I slide my finger across the glass.
Mark’s face fills the screen. He looks pale. Behind him, I see the gray living room. The perfect, sterile tree.
"Dad!" he shouts. "My God! Where are you? Are you… are you outside?"
"I’m on Route 66, Mark."
"Why? You’re supposed to be here! The flight—we can rebook it. Just send me your location pin. I’ll call a secure car service."
"I’m not coming, son."
The silence on the line is louder than the wind.
"What? Why?" Mark looks genuinely hurt. "Is it about last year? Dad, I promise, no lectures from Leo. Emily made the guest room hypoallergenic. We just want you to be safe. We want to take care of you."
I look at him, and my heart breaks a little. He’s a good boy. But he’s trying so hard to be perfect that he forgot how to be human.
"Mark," I say gently. "I don’t need a hypoallergenic room. And I don’t need to be safe. I spent forty years playing it safe at the factory so you could go to that fancy college and get that safe job."
"I don’t understand," he stammers.
"I don’t want to sit in the corner of your life and be quiet," I say, looking at the sunset, then back at the lens. "I love you. But I’m done being the guest you tolerate. I’m done apologizing for taking up space."
"But you’re alone on Christmas!"
I pan the camera around. I show him the trucker, who tips his cap. I show him the kids with the blue hair, who wave and rev their engines. I show him the endless, burning horizon of the American West.
"I’m not alone, Mark. I’m with the world. The real one. The messy, loud, greasy world you guys forgot about in your high-rise."
Mark stares. He sees the grease on my forehead. He sees the smile—the real smile—that he hasn’t seen since his mother passed away.
"You look… different," he whispers.
"I feel different," I say. "I’m going to finish this taco, Mark. Then I’m going to drive until the stars come out. Then I’m going to find a motel with a neon sign that buzzes all night, and I’m going to sleep like a baby."
Mark is quiet for a long time. Finally, his shoulders drop. He stops fighting.
"Okay," he says softly. "Okay, Dad. Just… text me when you stop? So I know you’re okay?"
"I will," I promise. "Merry Christmas, son."
"Merry Christmas, Dad. Drive fast."
I end the call.
The sun is gone now. The desert is cooling down. I finish my beer and climb into the driver’s seat. I turn the key, and the V8 roars to life—a deep, guttural growl that vibrates in my chest.
We spend half our lives teaching our children how to walk so they can leave us. But we often forget to teach ourselves how to walk again once they’re gone.
I put the car in gear. The headlights cut through the darkness.
Don’t wait for someone to set an extra place for you at a table where you have to whisper. The world is huge. The highway is open. And the best seat for Christmas isn’t on a velvet chair in a silent house.
It’s right here, behind the wheel of your own life.
🖊 the story Maximalist