The Self-Caregiver, Jeanette Yates

04/17/2025

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ REVIEW of From Guilt to Good Enough!

Jeanette has a wealth of knowledge and wisdom from a lifetime of experience as a caregiver. Most of us don't know what that's like until later in life as our parents age.

Whether you find yourself caring for aging parents or were forced into the role of caregiver at an early age, no one prepares you for the toll it can take on your own life.

This book is a great resource to help all of us navigate the role of caregiver without losing ourselves in the process." Joe G.

To get your copy of From Guilt to Good Enough, click here: https://a.co/d/bfDZh1T

04/11/2025

On Quitting Caregiving (an excerpt from my Substack)

"I have a piece of artwork in my office with the quote, “If you get tired, learn to rest, not to quit,” a saying often attributed to the artist Banksy.

I love this piece of art for multiple reasons. One is that my late stepfather gave it to me as a reminder and encouragement to rest. As a caregiver, professionally as a nurse, and, of course, when he was married to my mother, he knew how exhausting and overwhelming it could be. He also knew how tempting it was to want to quit. It is something we have discussed many times over the years– that idea of quitting.

When is it okay to quit? When is rest more appropriate? Life brings us many opportunities, dreams to pursue, goals to reach, people to love, and sacrifices to make. Which ones should we take? Which ones should we walk away from?"

To read the full post, click here: https://open.substack.com/pub/selfcaregiver/p/on-quitting-caregiving?r=3kiq3g&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

04/09/2025

Shout-out to for featuring me on their local author bookshelf in April and May!

If you haven't been to The Literary Lounge yet, you must check it out! This local, female (and teacher-owned!) bookstore is a Murray Hill gem that hosts workshops, book clubs, and events for all ages.

I am honored to work with them to get my book, From Guilt to Good Enough, into the hands of more readers. There are amazing books there!

If you are in Jacksonville, head over to The Literary Lounge and grab a copy of my book AND browse the other amazing books there!

The Literary Lounge
1080 Edgewood Ave S Suite 5
I am honored to work with them to get my book, From Guilt to Good Enough, into the hands of more readers. Be sure to browse the shelves. You'll find so many great books there!

04/04/2025

My burnout didn’t come in a big wave that overwhelmed me.

It came in the little moments that kept building and building. Thirty-five years later, still counting pills, not ten plus two, but 37. Thirty-seven pills each day, counting them out for the week. But it wasn’t even the counting of pills or the keeping track of medications, or the errands, or doctor’s appointments, or bed baths, or meal preparation. It was that all of it wasn’t enough. The gaps that I had promised to fill were still there, and she was falling through. And so was I. And all the pills and the errands, the bed baths and food prep, it just kept piling on and piling up until there felt like no way out.

Was this my life? Was this hers? Day after day just making sure she made it to the next medication time, the next doctor’s appointment, the next treatment, the next morning?

This is an excerpt from the latest post on my Substack, From Guilt to Good Enough: Real Caregiving Conversations.

To read the whole post, click here: https://open.substack.com/pub/selfcaregiver/p/when-you-need-as-much-healing-as?r=3kiq3g&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false

I needed a mother, but I had a patient. She needed a daughter but had a burned-out and guilt-ridden caregiver. The idea that stepping back and asking for help, essentially providing less care, would be what saved us both seemed impossible.

04/02/2025

😊Thank you to all who turned out for the Book & Author Chat for From Guilt To Good Enough! 📖 🌱

It was great to hear your stories and share mine with you. 🫶🏼

If you didn't make it but want to get the book or hear more about our upcoming Book Club, DM me for details! 💬 📲

03/27/2025

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️CUSTOMER REVIEW:

"The power in Jeanette's story is how raw and vulnerable she shares the guilt in caring for her mom. She says things we might think but would never admit to ourselves, and heaven forbid, anyone else. Yet, this is the magic sauce that leads to healing."

📚Get your copy of "From Guilt To Good Enough: A Caregiver’s Journey of Overcoming Burnout Through Healing Childhood Trauma" here: https://www.theselfcaregiver.com/book

Read this book to learn:
🫶🏼 How to cope with the emotional toll of caregiving in healthy ways.
🚧 To set boundaries that actually work.
🧖‍♀️ Why traditional self-care fails—and what truly works.
😫 Break free from dysfunctional family roles and reclaim your life...and so much more!

📚Get your copy: https://www.theselfcaregiver.com/book

03/19/2025

Here's what people are saying about "From Guilt To Good Enough":

"A masterclass in how to thrive as a caregiver"

"So much hope!"

"Honest & Compelling"

"A must-read!!!"

Whether you've been caring for your parents for a while or just starting to step in and help them more as they age, I wrote this book for you.

Get your copy today and start feeling confident as a caregiver without sacrificing your well-being.

Click here to get your copy>> https://a.co/d/cGKlcpd

03/12/2025

I went on a mini-vacation last weekend. The second time in a month that I left town, just because I felt like it, to spend time with friends and family, and I did this without freaking out or having guilt and anxiety, even though I am my mom’s caregiver.

When I started my journey to untether myself from the guilt I felt as a caregiver, I did not know that it would mean breaking free of the guilt I felt as a daughter, a wife, a mother, and even as a woman in an imperfect body.

I wrote about this profound realization in my latest Substack post. You can read it here: https://open.substack.com/pub/selfcaregiver/p/i-went-on-vacation-and-didnt-pack?r=3kiq3g&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false

03/07/2025

Yes, caregiving requires sacrifice, but it doesn't need to mean you sacrifice your life, your family, your connection to the world around you.

Living your life without neglecting your caregiving role takes practice, time, and support; caregiver coaching can help!

Here are 3 ways I can help you take back your time, without feeling guilty, even if caregiving seems to be all-consuming:

1. Clarity and Focus:
Coaching helps you define your goals and priorities clearly, making it easier for you to navigate the caregiving maze with confidence.

2. Personalized Strategies:
Every caregiving situation is unique. You’ll get custom strategies that work for your specific challenges, freeing up your time and energy.

3. Emotional Support and Growth:
Gain emotional support from someone who truly understands your struggles, helping you thrive both personally and in caregiving roles.

Let’s start your journey together. Comment ‘RESET’ to schedule a call

03/06/2025

I used to think that my whole life was caring for my mom, but now I know I can enjoy my life beyond her care needs.

Getting caught up in the demands of caring for your loved ones is so easy, especially when you are the only one who can help. I know, I have been there!

But, when we learn to let go of the guilt and worry and frustration...and all the things we cannot control, that opens us up to grab onto who we are beyond
our caregiving role.

In my book, From Guilt To Good Enough, I write about how I learned to care for my mom without losing myself. Or maybe it's better to say, how I found myself again.

I also share how you can do that too!

You can get your copy of From Guilt To Good Enough today! Comment "book" and I will send you the link!

03/06/2025

03/01/2025

Hey Caregiver friends! Happy !!

Remember, you are:
Worthy
Capable
Important

and You Are ENOUGH!

02/28/2025

If you feel like a failure at caregiving, I wrote this book for you.

I know what it is like to try so hard and still feel like you are falling short. It's never enough and you begin to feel like you aren't enough.

In "From Guilt To Good Enough," you'll learn to break free of the things that keep you stuck in guilt and overwhelm and start feeling confident in caregiving even and in your life beyond it.

Grab your copy today>>> https://www.theselfcaregiver.com/book

02/27/2025

I remember this haircut, the Dorothy Hamill. I remember this swingset in my dad's backyard and my grandparents' house on the other side of that fence behind me.

I also remember being happy at times, like in this photo, but constantly struggling with insecurity...at school and even sometimes within my own family. It wasn't them, necessarily. It was me. My best friend/cousin was beautiful and girly; I was awkwardly sensitive and preferred t-shirts and jeans to cute outfits. No one ever said this was "bad," but I definitely felt like a weirdo.

I didn't fit in, and until I was well into adulthood, I thought that meant something was wrong with me. I was different; my home life was different, and I was dealing with things that most of my peers were not...divorced parents, a mom who was chronically ill, and adjusting to complicated family dynamics.

If I could go back and tell this little girl something, it would be, "You are not too much. You do not have to earn the love of your family. You will make mistakes, and that is ok. You will fail, but you will be ok. You are enough."

I know this isn't my typical "self-caregiver" content, but I wanted to share this with you anyway. Maybe you felt like this as a kid. You may still feel this way from time to time as you care for your parents.

If you are a caregiver that doesn't feel like you fit in with other caregiver groups or that the advice given doesn't work for you, I want you to know, you fit right in with me and the rest of The Self-Caregiver Community.

You are welcome here. You are enough.

02/25/2025

"This book helped me so much on my parenting and caregiving journey, and the journal prompts after each chapter are so DEEP!" ~verified Amazon review

Get your copy of "From Guilt To Good Enough" here>> https://a.co/d/bBEDYfe

02/24/2025

“No judgment, but I could never do that.”

“I wish she would go to assisted living. She wants to stay in her home, so I have to deal with it.”

“I can’t keep this up, but I made a promise. She would hate me.”

I hear these types of statements from caregivers when discussing finding a place for their loved ones all the time. I even said these very things.

Read more on Substack: https://selfcaregiver.substack.com/p/i-promised-not-to-put-her-in-a-nursing

02/21/2025

Today is !

Need a way to let your favorite caregiver know you support them?

I've got an idea! 😉

Gift them a copy of my new book, From Guilt to Good Enough: A Caregiver’s Journey of Overcoming Burnout Through Healing Childhood Trauma.

Get a copy today>>>
Comment 'BOOK,' and I'll send you the link!

02/18/2025

99% of struggling caregivers are afraid of not being there if something happens to their loved one.

They say, "But what if..."
My loved one gets hurt?
They get lonely?
My loved one gets mad?

And the last one, the toughest one...

"What if my loved one dies and I am not there?"

While our loved ones must be as safe as possible when we are not with them, too much focus on the "what ifs" can lead to poor decision-making, a lack of boundary-setting, anxiety, and resentment.

All those things I mentioned up there? I have thought of them, too. I learned to let go of guilt and fear so that I could better care for my mom and myself. I am ready to help you do the same.

If this sounds like you and you are ready to let go of the "what ifs," let's discuss how I can help you.

DM me the words "LET GO," and we'll schedule a time to chat!