Modern Drunkard Magazine

Modern Drunkard Magazine Standing up for your right to get falling down drunk since 1996.

The True Story and Christopher and the MermaidsWhen Christopher Columbus sailed out of Spain’s Palos de la Frontera harb...
10/10/2025

The True Story and Christopher and the Mermaids

When Christopher Columbus sailed out of Spain’s Palos de la Frontera harbor with three ships, the Santa María, Pinta and Niña, he was searching for a short cut to the Indies. He would, of course, end up running into the New World instead. So, you’re probably wondering, did Chris pack some booze for the trip? Naturally. He loaded his ships with a full year’s supply of fortified wine, which traveled better than the non-fortified variety. And while the crew occasionally ran short of food, forcing them to survive on the fish they managed to catch, they never ran short of wine. A man’s got to have his priorities.

This abundant supply of fortified wine might explain why, on January 8, 1493, sailing near what is now the Dominican Republic, Chris claimed to have spotted three "mermaids" swimming in the ocean. He recorded that they were “not half as beautiful as they are painted.” They were likely manatees, but hey, we've all been there, right? Does not a proper measure of booze allow us to see beauty in all things, even lumbering beasts?

New drinking tee is on deck. Also, our Columbus Day Sale is underway. 20% Off your order with code: COLUMBUS20http://gea...
10/10/2025

New drinking tee is on deck. Also, our Columbus Day Sale is underway. 20% Off your order with code: COLUMBUS20
http://gear.drunkard.com

Our Annual Oddities and Closeouts Sale is on! Featuring prototypes, one-offs, event shirts, miscues, bad ideas taken too...
10/03/2025

Our Annual Oddities and Closeouts Sale is on! Featuring prototypes, one-offs, event shirts, miscues, bad ideas taken too far, and vintage warehouse finds. All at clearance prices.

All items are undamaged and unworn, unless noted otherwise in the descriptions. Vintage items may have some shelf wear. Extremely limited quantities.
https://gear.drunkard.com/product-category/closeout/

Our Labor Day Sale has begun. Also: New "Better Living Through Alcohol" tee is on deck. Now thru Monday. gear.drunkard.c...
08/29/2025

Our Labor Day Sale has begun. Also: New "Better Living Through Alcohol" tee is on deck. Now thru Monday. gear.drunkard.com

It's the final day of our 29th Anniversary Sale. 29% Off Everything with code: 29YEARS. https://gear.drunkard.com
08/08/2025

It's the final day of our 29th Anniversary Sale. 29% Off Everything with code: 29YEARS. https://gear.drunkard.com

It's Modern Drunkard Magazine's 29th AnniversaryTwenty-nine years ago today, way back in 1996, the first issue of Modern...
08/01/2025

It's Modern Drunkard Magazine's 29th Anniversary

Twenty-nine years ago today, way back in 1996, the first issue of Modern Drunkard Magazine was unleashed on the drinking public. At least we're pretty sure it was this day; things were a little hazy back then. You understand. Our working budget was 600 dollars and three quarts of Ten High Whiskey. The first issue was very hard to distinguish from a punk-rock zine cranked out on a photocopier. The artwork was highly questionable. The writing, well, the writing meant well. Most of the ads were made up out of whole cloth because even the dive bars we drank in were initially a little trepidatious about advertising in something with such a, shall we say, provocative title. The local established publications, most of which are now defunct, gleefully sneered at us. But, you know, we were gripped by that fine whiskey optimism, that keen idealism that usually grabs hold around the fifth drink. And here we are, a quarter of a century later. The secret of our longevity? We never viewed ourselves as a business trying to seize a niche, so much as a tightly-knit band of guerrillas waging a long, drawn-out war against the Nanny State. Niches come and go, but guerrilla wars go on as long as there is something worth fighting for.

And to celebrate, our 29th Anniversary Sale is on. 29% Off Everything with Code: 29YEARS
https://gear.drunkard.com

Our Father's Day Sale is on. 20% Off with Code: DAD20 gear.drunkard.com And don't forget to review our Annual Father's ...
06/13/2025

Our Father's Day Sale is on. 20% Off with Code: DAD20 gear.drunkard.com
And don't forget to review our Annual Father's Day Message: https://youtu.be/MT9pJKKjETc

Celebrate Cinco de Mayo with 25% Off your order! gear.drunkard.com
05/02/2025

Celebrate Cinco de Mayo with 25% Off your order! gear.drunkard.com

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