12/20/2024
I asked my daughter what she knew about lockdowns this week after Mondayâs shooting. To see where sheâs at, find out more about what she understood about why weâd need to practice locking doors, hiding away from windows, covering the glass into the hallway, identifying a meeting place a couple of blocks away in case theyâd need to evacuate.
I wasnât there to put any ideas in her head, or to be fully honest with her about the fear and anger in my head and heart when I remember that *it doesnât have to be this way* when it comes to the endemic gun violence that plagues our country and kills our children.
So I asked and listened. I let her lead. It was sobering and sad. But when I asked her who sheâd be hiding from if they went into a lockdown, she replied, âsomebody near the school doing something bad.â And I felt both a sense of relief and dread.
She doesnât understand yet that kids like her and her classmates are often the hunted. That the threat could be someone she knows, a schoolmate or peer. How do you lock down a school when they are already inside with easy access to a weapon designed to kill?
She doesnât understand it yet and I count that as a win. We made it through one more school shooting where my daughter doesnât realize it could happen anywhere. One more drill where she still believes our schools are sanctuaries for our kids. That sheâll be safe because sheâs there. One more news cycle of children running to their parents, calling 911 (a second grader made that call in Madison), and families frantically searching for their little ones at hospitals and reunification centers without thinking that could one day be her friends, her teachers, HER on that television screen as the nation collectively gasps and hugs their own family more tightly that evening but still canât manage to do anything to prevent it from happening again.
But, because we live in America, we know that this shooting wonât be the last. And there will come a day - a moment - where that sense of safety will crumble. It will fall away. Sheâll watch kids like her going through the unimaginable and understand that because we are unwilling to compromise on gun reforms in order to keep our kids safe, sheâs in danger.
And sheâll never be the same.