Good to Great Parenting

06/02/2025

This summer brings an online parenting summit just for parents of tweens and teens. Answering some of the trickiest questions about this stage, we know it's a challenge and we also know there's LOTS to help parents. Join us Feb 21-23 for a FREE 3-day summit with 16 top experts in parenting.
You’ll learn how to:
✅ Connect with your teen through tough moments
✅ Keep them safe online
✅ Manage parent guilt & care for yourself
✅ Support anxious teens & those with ADHD
✅ Improve time management & relationships
✅ Parent through tricky teenage years
This summit will give you a ton of value and we'd love to see you there.
🔗 REGISTER NOW:
https://lnkd.in/gGdbdWDt
Hope to see you there! 😊 hashtag hashtag hashtag hashtag

04/02/2025

⭐NEWSFLASH 2ND Calm Connected Tweens and Teens online parenting summit - REGISTRATION link posted here this week. Be sure to join us for free during the summit
👉 EB pass for extended viewing only $AUS49. 👈

How's the return to daycare/school and work for you? When we're getting back into the routine of school and work it's a good reminder that we get there a little at a time not all at once.

⭐ If you are stuck in a tricky moment this week, a transition to or from day care, homework horrors or bedtime refusal, remember the process of helping our kids to learn to regulate their attention and their emotions isn't a one off event.

🫶 Even when we have a tough day, week or month - there is still time to do what we need to help them.

⭐We are the adults with mature brain.

⭐ We are the one magic ingredient that helps soothe the overwhelm.

⭐We are the ones who can keep bringing them back into balance. We can do this a little at a time.

Our aim for our kids is to help them have the ability to regulate their emotions when they are stressed or upset and this is something that they learn over time.

21/01/2025

Watch the way these little ducklings hurl themselves out of the nest. It isn't pretty and they do it anyway.⭐

Our kids, just like ducklings are wired to take risks. Mama Duck sets them up for success in a few key ways, and we can do the same for our kids.

Here are 3 ways to help your kids take healthy risks (without totally freaking out):

1️⃣ A Soft Landing 🛟 – Ducklings jump because they trust the soft forest floor (and their fluff!). Give your kids a “soft landing” by reminding them that mistakes are part of learning and you'll be there to support them, not rescue them.

2️⃣ A Clear Call 📣 – Mama Duck doesn’t push—she calls. Encourage your kids to take risks by inspiring them with the why, not forcing them. Show them how challenges can help them grow.

3️⃣ A Flock to Follow 🦆 – Ducklings leap because they see their siblings do it first. Help your kids find friends, mentors, or even role models who encourage them to try new things. Community builds courage!

Letting go is tough, but just like those fluffy little ducklings, our kids are more capable than we think. 💛

What’s a risk your kid has taken lately? Share below! ⬇️

15/01/2025

⭐Parenting can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re juggling the everyday challenges of life while trying to raise happy, healthy kids. ⭐

👉Whether you're struggling with kids who won’t listen, managing tantrums, dealing with difficult behaviours, or navigating tough topics like divorce, anxiety, or va**ng, you’re not alone.

👉It’s hard enough to handle the usual parenting hurdles, and when you add in the unique challenges like supporting a child with Autism, ADHD, or learning difficulties, it can feel like a lot to manage on your own.

We don’t have to do it all by ourselves. When we understand both ourselves and our children better, we can build a more relaxed and connected family dynamic.

Together, we can develop strategies that work for your unique family needs, helping to reduce stress and frustration while creating a home where everyone feels heard and supported.

Whether it’s managing stressful situations, fostering better communication, or addressing deeper concerns like friendships, anxiety, or behavioural struggles, there are solutions that can help you feel more confident in your parenting approach.

We can take a moment to reflect on what’s working and tailor an approach to suit to your situation. Whether you choose one-on-one sessions or group workshops, I’m here to help you feel more equipped, focused, and connected in your parenting journey.

👉You don’t have to keep feeling stuck or overwhelmed. It’s never too late to get the support you need to make things easier.

👉Reach out today, and let’s work together to make this year the one where you enjoy spending more time with the people you love.

⭐Email [email protected] and let's talk about how this could work for your family.⭐

30/12/2024

Growth and challenge go hand in hand. Wise insights from Dr Ross Greene that highlight how this plays out for us in our lives as parents -

“Is it your role as a parent to create incompatibility to ensure that your kid grows, develops beliefs and values, sets goals, recognizes her strengths and vulnerabilities, and moves in a direction? No. There’s no need to manufacture incompatibility; it’s inevitable. Should you feel responsible for ensuring that life goes as smoothly as possible for your child so as to remove all potential for incompatibility? No. It would be equally counterproductive to go overboard on removing the bumps from the road. In a competitive world, can you really afford to let her stumble? In a competitive world, she’d better know how to get back on her feet when she stumbles, because you won’t always be there to lend a hand." -Dr. Ross Greene, Raising Human Beings



"Seeing your kid struggle isn’t fun. The trick is to pay close attention to whether she needs your help to overcome incompatibility or can manage it on her own. And the magic is in how, if she does need your help, you handle things from there." -Dr. Ross Greene, Raising Human Beings



"When it comes to grit -- a child's ability to get back up when she gets knocked down by a problem in life, I'm not exactly sure how the imposition of adult will, unilateral problem solving (Plan A), and adult-imposed consequences would help. There are some additional characteristics you badly want to foster in your child—empathy, taking into account how one’s behavior is affecting other people, honesty, taking another person’s perspective, and resolving disagreements in ways that do not involve conflict—but Plan A doesn’t foster those characteristics. Plan B (solving problems collaboratively) does." -Dr. Ross Greene, Raising Human Beings

http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/10/opinion/putting-grit-in-its-place.html?_r=0

24/12/2024

Kids are like tiny little truth bombs. No matter whether it’s a Christmas dinner or an everyday family meal, they keep it real. Happy Christmas Eve everyone! https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1DucDE4HNZ/?mibextid=wwXIfr

12/11/2024

Parents tell me that their children lack resilience but what does this actually mean? I think I hear a story about this sort of thing at least once a week. It can be a challenge when our child is dissolving into tears in front of us. It can make us scratch our head. We might ask ourselves “Why isn't my child more resilient?” We compare them to other people’s children. They don’t do this. It can be natural to look at their siblings and see a difference or even consider our own childhood experiences. In my experience parents often expect children to be bulletproof, to cope with challenge and to do it well. The truth is that we manage what is manageable. What is manageable will depend on your particular child, their developmental stage, temperament and the conditions around them. It’s complicated!

When our expectation of what our child can manage in the moment is out of line with what is developmentally expected it can be hard to show up in the way that our child needs us to. Working out what is right for our child will take time. We can all become more resilient over time. This includes adults. There ‘s a big connection between how well we as parents can tolerate an uncomfortable reality and how well our child can do it too. This means that a big part of cultivating resilience in our children is modelling it ourselves.

Even when it’s hard.

Even when we don’t feel like it.

When our kids are having a hissy fit or acting like it's the end of the world we can really struggle to pull this out of the bag. Think about a time when they don't get into the “A” team for netball or they missed out on a birthday invite. If you are cringing a bit thinking, how the hell will they cope in the real world if they fall apart over little stuff like this, then you are not alone.

So in the midst of that uncomfortable reality, the challenge, we have an opportunity. The choice is to stand there and judge them and say well they're just not resilient enough or to pause and consider for a moment how they might be experiencing the situation.

Showing up for our kids means accepting them.

Unconditionally.

This means all the yucky parts as well.

We are living in our adult brain and this is a very analytical place. Our adult brains says we’re the ones who've got the years of experience and we know that missing out on the "A" Team for netball is a tiny disappointments compared to losing a loved one or facing redundancy. We can’t protect our children from the harsh reality that they will surely face. Pointing this out when they are getting upset for what is a trivial matter won’t teach them to get through disappointing or crushing experiences. For kids to know how to manage the smaller set backs and become resilient we've gotta start where they are. We need to meet them in that moment.

Even if it seems to us that it's silly to treat it as the end of the world. Pausing and listening and allowing some space and taking time to help them regulate their feelings is a process. We're not being weak, permissive or too gentle. It takes a strong person to hold a hand of a young one who is scared of having a haircut and your grown up child who is in labour having her first child.

We can’t be too permissive or too gentle when we're being decent human beings who care. When we show up with that kind of relationship this is what will foster resilience. We can work with them overtime and know that they're not going to need this kind of support continuously all of the time. So my parent coaching advice is to help them through in little ways. They will learn how to get through disappointments and to face into bigger and more awful things when we give them practice. This is much better than brushing them under the carpet . Kids are gonna develop that resilience through relationship. You will help create the conditions for that practice to occur with the knowledge and the experience to know that even when it's difficult – Mum, Dad and the dog all have my back. No matter what.

24/10/2024

What are your thoughts on the reason our teens retreat to their bedroom? We want them to know we’ve got their back, no matter what.

Even in loving families kids disappear into their room. We know that kids feel overwhelmed because of how they feel and we do our best to hold space for them. The leap from being a toddler to a teen doesn’t feel that far for most parents I speak to. Some interesting insights into why the pattern of disappearing to their room happens and where it comes from. Does this make sense to you ?

This spoke to me today. Alanna kindly shared it with me in a message. This first passage is a quote from L.R.Knost - Little Hearts/Gentle Parenting Resources:

"Perhaps the reason teens isolate themselves when they're overwhelmed instead of coming to us with their problems, is because when they're toddlers we isolate them when they're overwhelmed instead of helping them with their problems."

This section is written by Laura Muhl:

When our kids are small and trying to manage emotions - they can't express what they are feeling. They throw tantrums, they throw things, they have meltdowns, they scream and they whine. This is their way of communicating with us. They need help to organize, process and express their feelings in a healthy way.

And society tells us we should punish them for this. Send them to their room, put them in timeout, s***k them.

We teach them and train them not to show their emotions. Don't whine. Don't complain. Your feelings are wrong. Be quiet.

Eventually they stop expressing their emotions to us because we told them over and over again we didn't want to hear it. For so long they needed to deal with it alone. Alone in their room, their chair, their corner.

And then they turn into teenagers and we expect them to feel safe talking to us. We expect them to know that NOW it's okay. They are subconsciously wired to think the opposite because this is what they grew up learning.

Give your child permission to feel. Let them know their feelings are valid and that you care, no matter how small. Make sure they know that they are heard.

Pretty soon meltdowns over crayons will turn into breakups, heartbreak, s*x, or even depression. You want your child to know that you will always hear them, no matter how small. You are their safe space."

(Shared via Kassie Ehler)

24/10/2024

I love receiving testimonials from the people I work with. As a former lawyer, it means a great deal to serve and help parents with the challenges involved in working and raising a family.

A big thanks for the kind words to Donna Douglas, HR Manager | Kaitohutohu Pūmanawa Tangata Pāhake MinterEllisonRuddWatts

We recently hosted a morning session for parents at our law firm. Justine Lamont from Good to Great Parenting facilitated the session and we learned about how developmental stages and temperament play a part in our parenting journey. I found Justine to be a fantastic communicator and very professional from the outset. Justine created a safe and encouraging space for us to ask questions, provide support to one another and instilled confidence in all of our parenting styles despite their differences. I would absolutely recommend working with Justine.

If your organisation is looking for ways to support the families you live and work with consider booking a time to talk - [email protected]

20/10/2024

One of the things parents tell me is this "My children NEVER listen to me". So often when we give an instruction or ask kids to do things we are not actually focusing on them. We are busy doing at least one, probably two, or even three things at once AS WELL AS giving them instructions. That is part of the reason why it doesn't work. What does work is an approach called the three stage approach. It does what it says on the tin. It helps you gain cooperation and to be heard. So I made this video to show you how to use it. I have worked with 100's of parents over the past 2 decades making a difference to their parenting. If you want to know how to do it watch the clip. It will help you connect with your kids, raise engagement levels and all without shouting. If you'd like to know more about how parent coaching can help your family with easy steps like this one don't delay. Email [email protected] or give me a call on 022 083 0251

09/09/2024

JOIN US on 18 Oct at Venus HQ for a lunchtime parenting masterclass.
Some feedback from our last event -
👉Thank you again for the insightful Parenting Masterclass; I gained a lot of valuable takeaways.
👉Thank you for the invite to the Masterclass - it was a useful session. It's hard to move away from traditional approaches that I was brought up with, so some good reminders and nuggets.
👉For details see below
👉Secure your place by emailing [email protected]

30/08/2024

We had a fab time at the Venus HQ today in our parenting masterclass.

🎯 Parents considered the ways they already support their families
🎯 We also looked at ways we can use knowledge from developmental experts
🎯 We covered the latest insights from neuroscientists and attachment people to foster strong bonds.

Key takeaways included-

👉Over time strategy is more effective than in the moment tactics
👉Temperament is a key factor we need to be aware of when working out what is a realistic expectation for our particular child.
👉There are no perfect parents - we're all real ones doing the best we can with the skills we have.
👉Parents are the experts on their children, we've been collecting the data for a very long time.

DETAILS OF NEXT CLASSES coming up soon. For more information or to find out how parent coaching could work for your family email and book in time to talk e [email protected]

14/08/2024

What one thing would make parenting easier for you right now?

12/08/2024

Many thanks to Mariska Viljoen from Labyrinth for Lemonade and Karin Blaauw from Barfoot & Thompson for the invite to speak at the Denim & Diamonds event on Friday night. A stunning set out, delicious food, wine and fabulous prizes made it a night to remember for 110 amazing women. My presentation featured practical and actionable ways to help parents. There were insights into how -

👉 Children don't need a perfect mother, they need a real one
👉 Setting a realistic expectation for our child means understanding developmental stages and individual temperament
👉 Communication styles influence relationship
👉 Parents are doing a huge amount to support their family by showing up for them already
👉 Parents can take steps to protect their energy
👉 Children's needs have not changed - they need warmth and structure
👉 The brain is a muscle which gets stronger with use, over time solutions are more effective than in the moment responses

19/07/2024

Who else here has a teen who spends a lot of time in their room? It's pretty common for parents to worry when teens spend a lot of time in their bedroom. Pay attention to your inner voice that says there's something going on with my teen and balance it with the knowledge that teens also need time to decompress.

18/07/2024

Join us for this masterclass for parents who have a lunchtime available to work on ways to support their family.

REGISTRATIONS ARE OPEN NOW email [email protected]

There’s no such thing as a perfect parent and even when our efforts fall short of where we want to be this can give us a golden opportunity to learn new things.

If this sounds like you and you would like some ways to be inspired to nail it at work and at home come along to this lunchtime parenting masterclass.

WHEN & WHERE

30 AUGUST at lunchtime 1pm-2pm at 148A Great North Rd, Grey Lynn 1021 AUCKLAND

WHY

A tailored approach aims to get results for your family. Celebrating success and uncovering the traits that can hold us back aims to meet the needs of each child and foster their well-being, resilience and independence.

WHAT

Focusing on effective and evidence based parenting techniques, we will learn ways to parent and build a growth mindset. We recognise and understand the patterns which are tricky and find ways to use practical and actionable skills at home.

DETAILS about what we cover in the flyer below.

FOR MORE inspiration/information about parenting/parent coaching see my website and socials
www.gtgparenting.co.nz
www.facebook.com/goodtogreatparenting

TikTok Justine Lamont ()

16/07/2024

Who else here gets the eye roll?