Abu Faatimah Dhikrullah

23/07/2024

*La Taqnatu Min Rahmatillah…….(لا تَقْنَطُوا مِن رَّحْمَةِ اللَّهِ)*

Never lose hope in a child's ability, capability and future.
Don't predict or assume the future of a child because of their present behaviour or situation.

Misbehaviour, theft, lies, lack of focus, bedwetting, etc are trials and sometimes phases. Don't use sledge hammer to hit a hobnail. With Patience, Prayers & Consistency InshaAllah you will get the best out of him/her.

Don't also do mistake of negligence. Focus, spend & pray on them. That child you think that will be a failure might be your saving grace.

May almighty Allah assist us with patience, optimism and make us successful in this world and akhiroh.

*Like, Share, save a situation*
©️ Abu Faatimah DAAA
Effective Islamic Parenting
https://chat.whatsapp.com/Lrry1GWm2yw8epacj6D5O5

22/07/2024

*PUSH UP, and not down*
Positive parenting ethics are what the Prophet and the pious predecessors practice with their children and family at large.

Be supportive, be involved, have patience, live healthy lifestyles, always listen, appreciate achievements, always encourage, enforce rules & boundaries among others.

You practice otherwise and still claims piety and Sunnah. Work Hard on yourselves more than them.

May we be a blessing to our children, family and the Ummah

For more on effective Islamic Parenting
https://chat.whatsapp.com/Lrry1GWm2yw8epacj6D5O5

19/07/2024

Remember this statement whenever ur going through a difficulty, feeling powerless, confused or defeated. Subhaan Allah this powerful statement really does give u ease & strength everytime u recite it with conviction & sincerity.

Teach ur kids this dhikr as well & remind them that that its Allah Subhaana wa ta'aala, the Almighty, who will solve their problem & make things easier for them no matter what the situation is.

May we be blessed with ease and comfort in all affairs of our lives.

©️ Abu Faatimah DAA
Like & Share
*Effective Islamic Parenting
https://chat.whatsapp.com/Lrry1GWm2yw8epacj6D5O5

18/07/2024

*Assalamu alaykum warhamatullah*

*Tommorow is another Jummah, let's meet to discuss effective Islamic Parenting*

*EFFIP TOPIC THIS WEEK?*
In Yorubaland Nigeria, children are given different 'safety' and "first aid" to keep them safe against diseases and evil 😈 eyes, These include painful marks, arm ring, neck chain, leg rings etc. *How proven,real & Islamic are these things.* In your culture or country, which practices relates to these?

*Dear kids*
*How was your promotional examinations? I want to join you in your school next term NURSERY 1😁. Now tell me your school name,and why your school. *BarakaAllahu fih*

*DON'T FORGET, JOIN EFFIP KIDS COMMUNITY TODAY* dm for details

Dear new parents, we do discuss and share experiences on topics that directly reshape you and your children for a successful future in this world and akhiroh. Don't miss this edition InshaAllah *TOMMOROW FRIDAY* .

Share, like and Join
https://chat.whatsapp.com/EAeJOGU6aFl1BZZwJbUH6V

18/07/2024

*Raise confident Girls*
Don't always focus your praise on looks. Praising looks feels easy because it's so visible.

If your daughter asked you how she looks, take the time to respond thoughtfully about who she is, who she mighty becomes and give her the ability to see it in herself.

Yes, my dear daughter, beauty is there, however it is now at all corners and likewise relative. You needs to add rare beauty to your gorgeous look.

*What are the rare beauties?* Your academic excellence, your Qira'at Qur'an,Your Hijab, Your Islam,Your character, and more importantly your chastity. Guard these rare beauty and you shine forever

*LIKE AND SHARE*
©️ Abu Faatimah DAA
Effective Islamic Parenting

https://chat.whatsapp.com/EAeJOGU6aFl1BZZwJbUH6V

27/02/2024

27/02/2024

Dad: Hafsoh Hafsoh! Hafsof !!

Children: ( No response)

Dad : Hafsoh Hafsoh! Hafsof !!

Children: ( No response)

Dad : ( very hot & angry) " SubhanaAllah and this girl is in this same house."
( Dad immediately locate a 12mm wire cable left over by his electrician)

Hafsoh: ( walking fast with obvious fears showing on her entire body.) Sir!!! Sir!!!!!

Dad : Come here now!!!!!! ( Baba shouted like the wield OAU lion) angry, furious and fully determined to hit hard.

Hafsoh : please sir, please sir, I'm in the toilet and I can't talk.

Dad : ( Fire of anger 🔥 brazenly) . SHOUT UP!!!!!!
( whip! , whip!! , whip!!!!, the cable make serious mark on Hafsoh).

Hafsoh was hitted on the left eyes.

Hafsoh: my eye! my eyes!!

Dad : (refused to stop as the anger continues.)

Few hours later, Hafsoh was rushed to the hospital by Baban Hafsoh. Hospital card #1000, consultation fees #8000, drug & drops #12,000.

Dad: ( pick up the phone, call Umm Hafsoh), please send #30000 out of the #40000 I kept with you for the market.

*Hmmm, Oju ti da, Okan ti walee. Always remember the prophet advise " DON'T! BE ANGRY, DONT BE ANGRY!!, DON'T BE ANGRY!!!.
Abu Hafsoh despite the Gbeseee, in Shariah, you still need to seek Allah's forgiveness. Don't also forget, " OJU APA KOJO OJU ARA".

*May almighty Allah bless us with the best of character.*

©️ Abu Faatimah DhikruLlah AbdurRaheem
Effective Islamic Parenting
https://chat.whatsapp.com/EAeJOGU6aFl1BZZwJbUH6V

26/02/2024

*A subtle way to teach your child that " feelings are human but actions in response should be Islamic & fair ”*

One of the major goal of positive parenting is to raise emotionally intelligent kids.

Hence it's important to accept our child's feelings and teach them how to deal with those natural feelings.

Acknowledging all feelings surely doesn't mean that we have to condole & look over actions resulting from those feelings.

Take for instance:

Dad: Why did you abuse your sister?

Child: Because she took my toy away.

Dad: You're angry. I understand ( the
feeling acknowledged).

But No matter how angry we are, we don't abuse as Muslims (setting a boundary). وَيۡلٞ لِّكُلِّ هُمَزَةٖ لُّمَزَةٍ
Woe to every scorner and mocker.

(Notice I didn’t respond abuse too, you don’t respond to anger with anger. You have to be calm, you’re teaching them to be calm too)

Come sit with me until you calm down.

Hold my hand and breathe slowly (teaching how to regulate himself,)

Child: I want my toy back. Take it from her.

Dad: I want you to sit with me now. We will get the toy when we figure out a better way to have it back.

Can you think of a way? (integrating his logical and
emotional brain)

Once you get to a solution, appreciate the child for calming down and not acting impulsively.

Dad: How do you think she must have felt?
(Teaching empathy)
How can we make her feel better?

Child: I don't know.

Dad: Well if I were at your place, I would say, "I'm sorry for hurting you. Can I have my toy back, please?"

Child: Ok I will try this.

Now you can use this method with next your child has an outburst of emotions, may not necessarily be hitting, but when there’s an action that isn’t acceptable, you can go this route with them.
©️ Abu Faatimah DhikruLlah AbdurRaheem
Effective Islamic Parenting

https://chat.whatsapp.com/EAeJOGU6aFl1BZZwJbUH6V

24/01/2024

*Choose Wisely*

They are not coming for you because they know for you it is too late

But your children?
Yes they are the real targets

Your children education is your responsibility.
The choice of school is your real choice.
What is your priority? Phonetics, Morals & Values, Islamic ethics,
Quran memorisation or what?

Choose WHO you want to give your child to raise & WHAT you want them to be taught

Act WISE before your children will tell you " fundamental rights" in replacement of the goodness to parents

Then DON'T BLAME ANYBODY but yourself.
Enroll your children in a sound Muslim School, Let them grow pious, consciousness and committed.
We are Muslims

*ABU FAATIMAH DHIKRULLAH*
EFFECTIVE ISLAMIC PARENTING

23/01/2024

*Respect*

Teach children how to respect.
Let them know that respect is earned and not given freely and that it is important to show respect in all aspects of life.

Let them know that respect is something that everybody and everything deserves. Not only Muslims - but all human being .

The Prophet SAW taught us to be kind and show mercy to others. And it's not just humans that deserve respect, but animals and objects like books and pens too.

Clearly explain to your child what it means to respect others belongings. Demonstrate respectful behavior towards others property in your interactions with your child and others. Children often learn by observing.

Teach your child to ask for permission before touching or using someone else belongings . Emphasize the importance of waiting for a positive response .Let them know the consequences of not respecting others and their properties,such as hurting feelings, damaging items or losing good friends.

Tunde moves from Ora village to Lagos, he was 10 years old.He was trained on courtesy, kindness, firmness and respect.Before Tunde join his peers in a neighbourhood football pitch, they usually end each match with fracas and hot argument. Even sometime with wounds & tears.

Tunde show love, kindness and fairness to all in a slow and steady manner.He never disrespect any, even the kids among them. He never use anyone's thing without permision. Tunde always insist on 'NO MATCH WITHOUT ALL TEAM MEMBERS'. This earned Tunde a big RESPECT from all within the shortest time he joined the team.

*Abu Faatimah Dhikrullah*
*Effective Islamic Parenting*

30/12/2023

I don't know how to teach my child? Read this!

The easiest yet the toughest way is
Be the Best Version of Yourself

Children are Constantly Learning from us. Good and Bad.

The tones, the mannerisms, the approaches and the mindsets.

Whether we like it or not, we are The Teachers.

Mirror the behavior you want your child to be.

That's exactly what Prophet Muhammad is to us

﴿لَقَدْ كَانَ لَكُمْ فِيهِمْ أُسْوَةٌ حَسَنَةٌ لِّمَن كَانَ يَرْجُو اللَّهَ وَالْيَوْم الْآخِرَ ۚ وَمَن يَتَوَلَّ فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ هُوَ الْغَنِيُّ الْحَمِيدُ﴾
[ الممتحنة: 6]

Laqad kana lakum feehim oswatun hasanatun liman kana yarjoo Allaha walyawma al-akhira waman yatawalla fa-inna Allaha huwa alghanniyyu alhameed

English
There has certainly been for you in them an excellent pattern for anyone whose hope is in Allah and the Last Day. And whoever turns away - then indeed, Allah is the Free of need, the Praiseworthy.
Surah Al-Mumtahanah
©️ Abu Faatimah DhikruLlah AbdurRaheem

29/12/2023

When a 💼gift is offered to your kids and you take it, and guilt trip them when they ask for it, Don't you think you are teaching them that's its okay to steal?

Why not open a bank accounts or get a piggybank ( kolo) to save, or teach them to give, save, invest no matter how small the sum.✅

Telling them " all the food you eat in this house, have you ever pay for it or how much is it self, abeg get out"❓❌
https://www.facebook.com/100083328033428/posts/343617015092564/?mibextid=Nif5oz