https://www.facebook.com/102319371218464/

Ben Kibiwott, Marigat (2025)

24/02/2023

😂HIV Test🤣

Brian went for HIV test in a hospital on Friday and was told to come back on Monday for the result.When he got to church on Sunday, the pastor declared to the people that, ''Everything you are looking forward to this week shall be positive!''Brian jumped to his feet and shouted, ''I reject it in Jesus name! My own go be Negative ooooo!"
🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

06/02/2023

😂 😂 *AS E DEY 🔥 HOT 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😍 😂 😂 😂 😂 😍 😂
1. *To All Virgins who Are Wondering What S*x is Like.*
*Well it's 10 Times the Feeling u Get When Cleaning ur Ears.*
🙄🙄🚶🚶🚶
2. *I Wonder Why girls With big Breasts Suspects Every Guy that Looks at Them*
🤔🤔🤔
3. *Doggy Style With a Slim Girl is like Eating With Fork and Knife,*
*All u Will Be Hearing is "chan chan chan"* ♨
🤣🤣🤣🤣
4. *In ds Weather, Any Babe that Visits Her Boyfriend While on Her Period is a Witch.*
🤣🤣🤣🤣
5. You're Too Big to Dance in Church But You go Gaga Crazy When you Hear the (gbedu wey dey Burst Brain)
God Dey Watch You o
6. You're Married but STILL Chases other Ladies and you Claim You're going for refresher courses
Your cup go soon full
7. Just because you met him in a bus and he bought you gala, you cm store his name as ''Bros gala''
Sista tank you o
8. You're an O'level holder but you sponsor your girl for university
My broda, you be scholarship board?
9. You dey inside hotel room snap picture come upload and write ''Home Sweet Home''
Your Mata Dey God's Hand
10. You enter public transport #600 to go shoprite go snap picture with other people's goods,
Abeg wetin i wan tell you?''
11. Do you know that 90% of Girls Urinate On Their Body While Bathing ?
12. Dangote did not send 'I love you Jesus to 25
people before he get rich' please stop disturbing
me or else I will curse ooo
13. NEPA is the Major cause of unwanted Pregnancy in Nigeria
Everythng starts when she Enters the Room to Charge Her Phone😅
14. Salary 20k, Phone 400k, Weavon 30k. And you go to church to ask God for a Miracle, When you are already Performing magic😂
15. If You Were Ask To Collect N1,000.
From All Your EX How Much Will You Get😂
As For Me I Will Get N4000
16. I overheard a girl talking to her BF, initially I thought she was talking to God, because the things she asked for only God can provide them😂
17. When the devil fails to destroy you, it sends you a girlfriend from MBA_ISE😜
18. Plz Kn

04/04/2022

PART 3
💥MAMA MBOGA💥
After kupromisiwa kutembelewa nilienda kwa hao c mnaelewa tu nyumba za machali kasisi hukaa😂😂nkachukua zile nguo chafu+socks+viatu nkaeka kwa gunia nkasukuma chini ya kitanda😹😹Nkapanguza nyumba mbiombio na nkaosha tuviombo ile nisionekane mchafu😂✋nkaenda soko kutafta samaki zile kubwa kubwa mbili za soh na viungo😋😋nkarudi home nkaamua kurelax bed nikitegea huyo dem anibeep😹kitu around 7:30jioni akanitext nifungue mlango ashafika Mimi naye ni Mani Mara that that😂😂😂Shida nilikua nayo sikua na viti its either ukalie mtungi ama kitanda😹😹sa ilibidi akalie kitanda nkamsho kaa anaeza asha gas apike supper nshabuy😋😋akakubali then akasema niendee unga ya uji amezoea uji😹😹nkashangaa but niliendea then after kupika supper akaanza kupika uji😂😂kumaliza kula supper kidem kikaleta tena uji kumbe alikua amebeba (mkombero)only for genious na njugu akabondea kwa uji😳😳weuweh wacha nkunywe uji😋😋kumbe huyo dem ni krimino wa mapenzi😂😂tukaenda bed tukaanza romance polepole nkimgusagusa karibu na COG yake akaanza kuwet akaniutak shati nkabaki na vest akaingiza mkono kwa boxer 😋😋akaanza kuchezea shilingi kwenye tundu ya choo😂😂wacha nkaingia rasmi kwenye uwanja nakwambia nilipiga bao zingine extraordinary😂😂sikuwai choka✋✋nilisalute huyo dem yangu yote imagine from 8:30pm to around 3pm nyumba ni nyimbo tu😂😂😂then kuamka morning.......watch out part 4 over 18 only😂😂😂
Like my page😉😉😉

04/04/2022

PART 2
💥MAMA MBOGA💥
So the next day ilifaa ikue birthday ya kijana yake na alikua ashaniinvite😋😋nilijisemea kwa roho huyu mama atajua mluhya ni kusema nini😹😹mwanzo venye nakaa pekeangu kuonja kuku na chapati ni k**a usiku wa Giza😹😹so nkajiprepare kitu 7:30 asubuhi nkadunda huko bila kuchelewa😂😂kuonyesha ujirani mwema kufika huko nkapata pia relatives wake wamefika kutoka ushago kumbe walitravel usiku 😋😋nkajiunga nao kwa wimbo wa Happy birthday yake Harmonize🔥🔥baada ya muda kiasi aliniita jikoni kiasi nmsaidie kuchinja kuku maana Mimi ndio nilikua tu hapo chali pekeake😋😋nkafanya hivo but kuna dem hapo alikua ametokea ushago kwao sema dem mrembo sio sura,sio shape wema sepetu kando😂😂nkajisemea once cozy always cozy nkaanza kufikiria vile ntapiga mistari😋😋Ju nilikua nyuma ya jikoni pekeangu nkichinja kuku nkaitisha huyo dem Maji moto🔥🔥nkamsho asiende anisaidie kushika kuku tutoe mabawa 😹💪kudem kikakubali Mimi naye nkajua hii ndio opportunity ya kupiga mistari😋😋😋👇👇👇
Me::Nikuite nani bytha???
Her::Am mercy😉
Me::What a good name😋😋
Her::hahaa really?and what about you??
Me::Am Mr Cozzy boy ukipenda Benito but huku mtaani naitwa The Prophesa😉
Her::Wooow
Me::Can I have your contact so that we can be sharing ideas???
Her::Okey...
Me::,Nice leme flash you get mine😋
Nkajua baaas hivi ndio bahati hukuja ntamfanyia mazihara hadi atii😂😂Sa vile tulimaliza kuchinja kuku tukarudi sitting room kuimbia mtoto hbd😉But Mimi ni nani nkaanza chatting na huyo dem ili watu wasielewe nkamsho me nakaa tu hapo karibu😝😝akanipromise kunitembelea coz atakua huku for a period of one week💪💪kusikia hivo nilihisi damu ikiflow at the rate of 167cm/min sec 😂😂si wacha mungu aitwe mungu nkapromisiwa kutembelewa that night😂😂Watch out part 3 ndio upate kuelewa zaidi kilichotendeka💪💪LIKE 👍 MY PAGE😉💥@💥

04/04/2022

PART TWO
★TRUE LOVE💖💖
Baas so after classes manze Dem vile alikua amenishow tunaezachat whatsApp so immedietly 👁️nilimtext👇👇
Me::Hi Jane??
Her;:Hi too cozy boy how's you??
Me::Am good less you my dear😚😚
Her::Am also good 😘
Me::Wooow that's nice to here
Her;:Okey remind me ulisema wewe n mkale??
Me;:Yes yes am a kalenjin
Her::Wooow lucky me😋😋😋Huwa natamani wakalee saana
Me::(smiling)Yes indeed you are lucky Hadi madem hunisumbua but Mimi nilipenda tu wewe😚😚😘
Her;;:Woow,,,Thanks alot manze can we meet for lunch today coz najua unakaa nje but Mimi Niko ndani kwa hostels
Me::Yeah we can if possible😋😋
Her;:Okey nikitokea outside get nitakushtua ndio tuongee zaidi sawa
Me::Popoaa
Sasa hapa nilijua kimeumana mwanzo Dem anadai lunch na ile kusota nimesota😂😂😂Mfuko inatoa tu Echo😥😥So K**a vile alisema nilinawa uso harakaharaka nikajisprey😂😂nisinuke Kondoo alafu nkachukua my Empty wallet nkaweka kwa my side pocket then nkajifanya Niko na kakitu Dem asinichukie so after like 30minutes Dem akanitext nitokee twende ""Adonai bar&Restaurant"" Nayonayo nikajijaza Hadi huko tukaelekea hoteli kumbuka Sina kitu 😂😂but tunaenda kula haidhuru tukaandamana naye akinipa stories about her life experience nikimskiza tu😚😚then tukafika hotel Akaitisha Menu nikajua baaaas Mimi kwisha😂😂🙏🙏Manze Sina kitu na sijamwaambia but haidhuru Dem Akaitisha Chips Kuku na soda kubwa na akaniitishia pia nkashtuka manze but ilibidi nijinyamazie tu😥😥Sina Uwezo so tukaendelea kula tukipiga mastory.........aaaah follow Part 3 ujue mbivu na mbichi😂😂😂 invite 50 nikuje na part 3

02/04/2022

PART 1
🔥 TRUE LOVE 💖 💖
Baaaaassss Kuna Huyu Dem alikuaga coursemate wangu alikua anaitwa Vera si huyo Dem nilikua nmemcrushia walai😚😘Sema kuumbwa manze but Dem alikua somehow mgumu but sikufa moyo though nilikua muoga kumsho ilibidi nijitahidi tu coz Sina otherwise 😹😹madem warembo huwanga na matusi saana👋so Kuna Huyu beshteangu Trevoh nilimsho about my situation jamaa akaniadvice nijitume tu akinikataa Basi nielewe it was not meant for me😩😩So ilibidi one day tukiwa discussion Fulani nimface tu mwanzo kwa class nilikuaga umeme Hadi alikuaga ananiogopa upande wa kitabu😹😹so ilibidi niandike kapaper then nmpe kisiri tu coz hangedinda kuchukua😹😹👇👇
""Dear Vera,
""Reason ya kukuandikia hii later is that nimekufeel toka kitambo na ningependa uniruhusu Moyoni mwako you are the only one my 💓 heart has chosen so kindly I request you to love back ""
Yours admirable
Zélcér
so kumpa hiyo letter after kuisoma for a while akareply back kwa hiyo letter🤓sikujua ameandika Nini so moyo ulikua unadunda manze 😹😹So kufungua hivi nikapata ameandika
""Thank you for loving me here is my contacts 07######XX chat me on whatsApp today after classes""
Weeee Sema kuruka juu manze Sasa hapa nkajua deal imeingiana😹😹😹Mambo yanasonga shwari kabisaa so ukitaka Kujua what next follow me on PART TWO ujue kilichoendea like my page 👉
Ikifika 200 naleta next o

02/04/2022

PART 1
💥MAMA MBOGA💥
Pale nje ya ploti yetu kulikua na mama Fulani alikua anauza mboga na matunda tofauti tofauti🍑🍒🍆🍅🍄sasa alikua something like 30 years hapo hakua old sana😉na alikua na one child(boy)So tulianza kuzoeana naye coz alikua mpoa sana nikibuy mboga ananipa hadi addition😋😋my love to her ❤❤was extraordinary but niliogopa kumsho mwanzo she was older than me nlikua namtamani tu kiundani😋😋one day nilienda kumuuliza about her background akanisho vile waliachana na mume wake tangu hiyo siku aliamua tu kujitegemea hatamani kuoleka tena😒😒atajishughulikia tu pia mwanawe na maisha ikisonga😉Nilianza kua rafiki wake wa karibu though alikua anastay the plots next to ours😋Alikua kaumbika ni mama ndio lakini mwili ni ya Tanasha Dona😘Macho sexy haga nayo imejichora kwa dress sema kummezea mate😋😋Though nik**a aligundua nko interested kwake kimapenzi😂nilijisemea moyoni huyu akieza nipa nakanyaga as if nko disco matanga the last day😹😹So the next day alinialika birthday ya mtoi wake...

Watch out part 2

Like my page 💙

04/01/2022

PART 7: MAZISHI YA MAPENZI

Vidole vyangu vya mikono vilitetemeka ungedhania zinapiga densii☺. ''Swee .....na....umewahi niona kwa hiyo shule?''🤔 Nlijarbu kuongea lakni sauti ikatoka nzito k**a ya Jeff Koinange😅. Modee wa English ama dem wa mine aliniangalia kw muda🙂, roho nayo ikaniambia 'utajua ni mazishi.' Baada ya kunyamaziana kw muda wa chupa kuoza dem wngu akasema😎, ''Niambie wew ni mwanafunzi kw hii shule si ndio?''
Nlijarbu kujitetea lakni wpi? Nyani mm siku zngu zilikuw zimefika. Nifanyaje?🤔🤔🤔😁

Ilibidi niweke masilaha chini na kusalimu amri kw kumwambia ndio mm ni mwanafunzi pale shuleni🤗. Nakwambia aliposikia tu hivo alinifukuza nyau nyau k**a mbwa😥....''Toka hapa, shetani bila mkia😫.''

Pale shuleni maisha ilibadilika kabsa😴, kwanza matumaini yangu ya kupita mtihani yalitolewa hospitalini yakapelekwa I.C.U. ....Nakumbuka siku moja tukifanya mtihani wa English (ambayo Ex-dem wngu atasahisha)🤓. Ilikuwa composition, mm nkaandika hivi ;

Begin with it was around late night and everyone was asleep........ 🛌asleep like nothing, i heard mbu!🗣️ Uuuwi!! Wuuui! Uuuuwi!. I thought i was dreaming but it was of true. So i woke up drinking myself a coat and borrowed God, so i took a hii ya kurarua miti⛏️ and got out😂😂.
Many people were at the middle of their outsides. My mother had already been out and was aresting her bones😅, people were asking it is of what? But from where the noise was coming from they were not returning the question 🤷🏾‍♂️. So i filled myself and took a kiberite and said whatever will sing will sing😂, as i went holding my intestines with fist😆.
When i arrived there were alot of people.they were sorouding a particular guy who had substructed his trouser and it was there on earth🤣🤣🤣....he was caught climbing my jirani's cow peacefully😂😂....some people were saying he should repeat that before everyone
When i saw that, i was being caught by sleep, i went back running KIPCHOGE KIPCHOGE🏃 to my house. AMEN!

Baada ya examination kuisha nlikuwa games nacheza ball🙄. BAZU saizo najijazz kw majamaa😛 nkijua 'compo yngu italead.' Infact akili ilikuwa ikiniambia, 'Na kwanza dem wngu anaimark😋, hapa nitachafua k**a marks🙌.' Kidogo kidogo nkiwa nimetulia prefect akanshow naitwa kwa staffroom na modee wa English☺. Mimi huyo nkatoka unyoya, kufika uko alkuw peke yake kw ofisi. Roho ikanichapia😋, ''itaenda hivi hivi uangushiwe mzinga wa nyuki, ukule asali🤓''
''Niambie,'' nkamwuliza modee wa English. After kuuliza hivo nkawekelewa kofi ya stima ''PAAP💥''. Nkashikwa na kizunguzungu, nkaanza kuona modeee wa wawli. Kujam, nkakunja ngumi.....

PART 8 inakuja💣. Stay tuned kwa page👉

04/01/2022

PART 6: MAZISHI YA MAPENZI

Kuenda kuinua sufuria ynye imetumika kufunika ugali nkagusa mkono wa MTU😫. Alinyamaza, nkanyamaza😊. Ghafla, akakimbia lakni hakuwa na mbio, yani alienda kw slow motion😎. Roho yngu ilkuw karbu itoke inimeze juu ya pressure nimeiweka all the term😉. Yule jamaa alipofika nje🤗, kumtazama kw umakini, kumbe alkuwa, ''MAFUTA KANONO'' mwenye huwa anapenda kuniongelesha dry😀. Roho ikaniambia ''baaaas lipiza kisasi😁'' ...Nkatulia ndani ya jikoni ncheki ataenda wapi🤔. Kw bahati mzuri akaenda direct kuelekea kw choo.

Coz sikutka anijue, nlivalia kininja😎, yani nlibaki tu na boxer, ungekutana na mm ungedhani mm ni nightrunner🙄. Nlipofika pale kw choo nkamfungia ndani silently then nikasonga kando nione vile gaidi katajisadia this time round😛. Alipojarbu kufungua mlango alipigwa na shock, akaanza kupumua mrefu k**a mimi kwa zile episodes za MAZISHI YA MAPENZI🤓.... ''Aki woiye nihurumie, nfungulie mlango,'' Mafuta kanono alisema. Nkameza mate kisha nkamwambia kw sauti ya juu , ''Natka uombe k**a Paulo na Sila hadi milango zifunguke!😂''
Alianza kuomba hadi nkamhurumia😊🙏, nkamfungulia. Naye alipotoka nje aliniambia asante na kuniita ''MHESHIMIWA.''

MAFUTA, alienda kulala mm nkarudi jikoni kuenda kuconfirm ile sembe😁. Kufika jikoni nkaifinyanga ile ugali na supu ya cabbage hadi tumbo ikasema 'tosha kw leo.' Nlipomaliza kukula ilkuw like saa tano usiku. Akili naye ni nani?🤔 ikaniambia 'enda teachers-quaters uko ndio dem wako ako.' Naye mm ni nani nikatae kuenda na niko na drspell😅.
Nakwambia, nlivalia kinyasa fulani hapo nlkuw nimeificha mahali, kisha nkaelekea hadi kw base huyo modee wa English hulala☺.

Nlipofika🤔, nkabisha mlango mara kumi ndio akaamka kufungua. Alishangaaa kuona babes wake uko na tna usiku🤔. Nlimdanganya kw kumwambia, ''Nlitka kukusurpise😋, coz juzi nlkuw om. Nkatravel pande hii jana kw anko yngu🤗...nkakutana na modee fulani kw center leo asubuhi nkajarbu kumuuliza huwa wew unalala wapi😃.'' Baada one, two, one, two dem akaniamini coz mm ni BAZU na dem ananipenda😍. Nakwambia dem alkuw amedungia kamini skirt kengne black, shape ya haga ikajichora smart😋. Wcha hta haga, kifuani alkuw amebeba sharp pointed t**s 90• kando😯. Alkuw na shape ya kihuddah huddah hivi🙂...yani ule urembo wa aina yake. Saa hizo skuw na shirt🤗 ..nlitka ajionee janadume yenywe alivyobeba😁💪. Huku mzee mfupi alikuw amesimama tu na kiherehere yake😩 (Mafans huyu mchezaji hta hawezi kungoja uwanja ifyekwe??). Sikuw najiamini tna coz ya ile dry spell nlkuw nayo😎, ni kitu leventeen years ago 😁😁 nkihave sex😬.

Sisi hao ndan ya nyumba🤓. Tuliangaliana kwa mda kisha aka smile na kuniambia🤓 "aki nimekumiss". Akilini nlkuwa najiambia 🤐, "hii kitu ntalima mpka chini ya parent rock🙄 yani lazma nmwage mpka na damu😆" Saa hizo dem amenshika begani, nafeel tu ni k**a za heaven zimenshika✌. Dem kaniuliza, ''Babe hii shule nafunza inaitwa ST. LUKE HIGH SCH, na wew pale kw timeline yako ya Facebook umeandika ati still schooling in ST. LUKE HIGH SCH, what about it?😩😩😧🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔''
Vidole vyangu vya mikono vilitetemeka ungedhania vilkuw densiiii.....

MAZISHI tunayo, hatuna??? Tegea part 7 ya MAZISHI YA MAPENZI hapa tu kw page 👉

26/12/2021

Nimetumia jamaa mwingine 10k ya rent mistakenly so nikajua nikimwambia a reverse back atakataa so nikamtumia text nikaandika "Welqam to illuminatti brotherhood ,we have sent you some welqam amount .If you aren't interested please reverse back the money with two hours, " .😂nikapolea nikingonja dooh zangu zirudi, then message ikaingia nikathani pesa zimerudishwa kusoma nikapata imeandikwa "Please I am interested even my cousin here is interested please send her some welcome amount"😊😊Then I just fainted

Moral lesson:1.Maisha ni gumu na pesa muhimu😂
2.Life is important but money is importantier😂😂😂😂😂

20/12/2021

PART 5: MAZISHI YA MAPENZI

Nlijarbu kusonga mbele😌 miguu yngu ikakuw nzito k**a mimba🙈. Wanafunzi walinyamaza wote wakijua chenye kinanisubiri ni kifo😞, mwanzo deputy prinsi alkuw simba💥. 'MAFUTA' mwanafunzi mnono kw wote shuleni alingusa mguu kisha akasema kw sauti ya chini, ''Jeuri leo hiyo mkia wako kidogo, ya pesa nane itakatwa😃.''...... Mimi naye ni nani? Nliamua kurudisha mkono kw kumwambia, ''MAFUTA hauoni hta vnye umenona😁, hadi tumbo yako imegawika mara tatu k**a ng'ombe ya grade🤓''

''Lipua nakupea sekunde tatu, ufike hapa mbele😒, '' deputy principal akaamrisha. Nlistuka na kutetemeka k**a mgonjwa wa kifafa😝, sijui cha kufnya. Kw bahati nzuri ama kw bahati ya sir God🙏, mwalimu wa kiingereza(dem wa mine) akapigiwa simu, ikabidi atoke kw parade aende areceive call🙌. Infact, alienda hadi na nyuma ya madarasa😎. Hapo roho yngu ikatulia😋, nkasonga mbele ya parade. Nli.face mastudee wenzangu ungedhani nlkuw nimechukua number one kw exams😅. Kila mtu alinyamaza kisha deputy prinsi akasema, ''huyu ndiye jangili kw hii shule😁, anashinda akiambia form one's ati yeye ni BAZU☺, ati anaweza hta pea PRINCIPAL transfer letter na hkna kitu atamfanyia, nkt! wanafunzi k**a hawa hkna kitu atapita kw hii shule, labda tu apite mlango ya shule😂😂😂.''

Wanafunzi walinichekea😇, kwanza form one's. Moyoni nlitamani nipewe mmoja wao nimtafune hadi akose sura, lakni wapi????🤗 ...baada ya parade deputy prinsi akanipeleka ofisini mwake akaniwekelea nyahunyo k**a ten hivi😫. Tako langu lilikuw limemewaka moto ungedhani nachoma makaa🙁. After kutoka ofisi ya deputy prinsi, nlichapa walking race kali hadi dorm(sikuw na hamu ya class tena)😐. Nlipofika dorm, nlilala kw bed one way k**a maiti...ama kweli si mapenzi yngu ni maiti mtarajiwa???😣

SHIDA, nlipoamka ilkuw kitu saa tano usiku na sijekula lunch na supper, na vnye mi ni sembeholic😯. Wanafunzi wote walkuw wamelala😮. Nlitoka kwa bed kisniper, nkaelekea jikoni coz huw nko sure kuna sembe huwa inabaki😝. Nlibomoa dirisha,kisha nkaingia ndani ya jikoni🙌. Nikaenda hadi penye sembe iko🙂, saa hiyo giza iko kibao but sikugusa hata meza juu mind yngu ilikuwa focused kwa sembe😀👌. Nliruka moto na ndoo ya vyombo chafu successfully✌. Ile time nlienda kuinua sufuria yenye imetumika kufunika ugali, nikagusa mkono ya MTU💔....................

PART 6 inakuja, stay tuned kw page 👉😋

20/12/2021

Jirani ameumwa kichwa na nyoka🐍, nikachukwa kamba nikamfunga tight kwa shingo🥺. Sai naona akirusharusha miguu🦶, hapo si sumu inatoka sasa.😂🤣🤣😂

20/12/2021

Hii neno "I'm sorry" hutuliza moyo sana lakini ngoja Tu uambiwe na daktari 😂😂😆💔

20/12/2021

Mnaangalia👀 Memes zangu k**a p**n 😅no comment no like just pleasure
🥴🤗🤓🤠
anyway thanks💔✌

20/12/2021

Wachana na heartbreak ,kuna hii pain ingine ati mnangoja wageni waende ndio mkule😂🤣🙌

23/11/2021

PART 4: MAZISHI YA MAPENZI

Kuenda kugeuka ilkuw mwalimu wa Maths😪. Alinkodolea macho makali k**a ya Atwoli kisha akasema, ''kijana, ninakutuma fimbo ofisini unakuja hapa ku,harass form 1😎, yani unamwambia asipokuoshea nguo eti utamkamua?🤔 Sasa tafuta fimbo nzuri nkukamue, nakwambia leo nitakutandika usipolia, nitalia😝.'' Nlijua sasa hapa, hkna option bali tu kutii kichapo cha mbwa😥.

Nlitafuta fimbo mbili nzuri kisha nkampea🤗. ''Touch your toes, '' mwalimu aliniambia. Nlitoa viatu kisha nkainama kushika vidole vyangu🙂. ''Kijana yani unakuja kujifnya sukari kw hii shule, ati sasa tukulambe?🤔'' ....Mwalimu alinpea nyahunyo ya kwanza takoni😴, ilkuw moto k**a kipara ya kibaki, nikakausha hiyo. Akanipea nyahunyo ya pili, PAP. This time ilkuw moto zaidi🙄, machozi yakaanza kutoka machoni😓. Roho ikasema, ''Wew ni ndume🤐.'' Wakati ya tatu ilishukishwa, tako ilikuw moto k**a jehanamu....ikabdi nshike tako langu na mkono😮. Mwalimu akasema, ''Juu umeshika umefuta hiyo😪💔.''
Nyahunyo ya nne ilipoachiliwa🤗, machozi yngu ilkuw imeanza kumwagika ovyo sasa, mwalimu akasema, ''unalilia nani?🤔 sitaki kuona harufu ya machozi hta, kimbia darasani na usirudie kosa lako.''
Nlipanguza machozi coz sikutka classmates wngu waone BAZU akilia.....then, nkakimbia mpka class😮.

Vnye nliingia darasa🙄, nlitembea polepole hadi kw locker yngu, vnye nlijarbu kukaa chini tako ilkuw moto k**a jiko. So nlikaa juu ya hewa, nkishika locker😒.

Ghafla bin vuu nkidhani mambo yamekwisha😫, (kumbe shetani naye amechimba 6-fit down sea level ya jeneza la mapenzi yngu). Deputy prinsi akaingia na kusema twendeni parade🤓. Tulipofika assembly, walimu wte walijitokeza, akiwemo😌, mwalimu was English, karembo kangu. Coz mastudee walkuw wengi sikuw na wasiwasi coz hkna vnye angeni.spot kirahisi😯. Ticha on duty aliongea kisha akamkaribisha deputy principal. Nkiwa nimetulia tu hivi😝, Deputy principal akasema, ''there are arising cases of monolisation & us as teachers we won't tolerate with it....LIPUA, the notorious criminal in this school come forward😞.....''...... Makosa!!!! Maze, niende mbele, si yule mode wa English ataniona na kitaumana🤔🤔🤔😌.

Nlijarbu kusonga mbele miguu ikakuw nzito k**a mi.......

Tegea PART 5 . Stay tuned kw hii page 😯 . Alf c nibuyie data bundles 0704810252

23/11/2021

PART 3: MAZISHI YA MAPENZI

Nkajua sasa hapa nkiingia ndani☺, ntakuwa nimepigilia msumari ya mwisho, kwenye jeneza langu la mapenzi😓❤💔. Nje ya staffroom nlipumua moja ndefu k**a lori ya transis. Saizo roho inasema, 'ingia tu ndani🙌'...miguu nayo ina,oppose inatka kutoroka hadi dorm. Mwishowe, nkaamua kuhepa mambo ya mwalimu wa maths. Nkachana guu hadi dorm😎. Nlitulia kw bed nkiwa na stress kibao, nafeel tu kuachana na shule😇.

Akili ilikuw ikiniambia, ''Ona sasa ulivyo?🤔 Umehepa mwalimu wa maths, na huyo ni transformer ya stima..wew kusema ukweli, umejipaka asali takoni, kisha ukaupindua tako lako (kuelekeza) kwenye mzinga wa nyuki😎.'' Nlitamani kulia, lakni machozi yalikataa kutoka. Roho nayo ikiniambia, ''baaas kufa kikondoo☺💔.''

Nlihisi kiu ya maji😊, nkaelekea penye tap ya maji iko...kufika uko nkaptna na FORM 1😯, na vnye mi ni BAZU na nadharua form ones. Hii ndio conversation yetu🙂🙂👇👇👇;
ME: Mono unafnya nin hapa?
FORM 1: Nakunywa maji.....
ME: Unakunywa maji mingi kwani wew ni ng'ombe?🤔
FORM 1: Hapna sio hivyo😥.
ME: Kwanza uliitwa hii shule ama uliombewa...?
FORM 1: Nliitwa😇.
ME: Uliitwa ukaitika aje?
FORM 1: Hapana nliombewa.
ME: Uliombewa na pasta nani?😝
FORM 1: [laughing] mm sikuelewi, yani hii maneno yako haingii akili yngu😉.
ME: Mono k**a haiingi akili yako jarbu kuzindulia ndani🤗....halfu kabla uende class enda hapo kw cube yngu unioshee nguo na ubrush viatu vyngu😗. Usipofnya hivo ntakukamua before nkuuu.😎..[kabla sijemaliza kuongea sauti ikaongea nyum yngu]
SAUTI: Ni nani huyu ana,harass form one....kijana? Kijana? Geuka nkuone😁✌.

Kuenda kugeuka alkuwa mwalimu wa😪......

PART 4 inakuja🙏, stay tuned kwa page . Like my page & SHARE my posts 🤗✌🙏🙏🙏💥💥💥💥💥.

22/11/2021

I forgot to zip my trouser, so a lady told me politely, " Sir your garage is open" I gave her naughty smile😅as I zip up and asked, "Did You see my RANGE ROVER parked inside? "
The lady smile back😆and said *no just one small TOYOTA with two flat tyre, *

I'm still crying 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭....... 👉👉

Ben Kibiwott

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