Aligned Choices Mediation

09/30/2024

Please join Karen Omand and me for a deep dive discussion on relationship coaching and why I've chosen to offer this service.

09/07/2023

“Never give up” is a great self-affirmation. But sometimes when in a relationship, you are left with no choice.

If you are willing to say, “This is no longer what I need”
Or “This is just too much to cope with”, you are then able to pivot and push for real change.

Please remember that when you choose to end your marriage, you are not giving up. Rather you are taking a big step towards caring for yourself first.

When your relationship no longer serves your values, goals or well-being, it is ok to refocus on your personal growth and happiness.

09/06/2023

Even if they are also a lawyer, no family mediator can provide legal advice to any of their clients. We can provide you with legal information directly, refer you to online resources like stepstojustice.ca, or help you negotiate the terms of a separation agreement… but we cannot advise you in any way.

If you and your spouse can usually come to agreement on child related issues and you trust the others financial reporting, Family Mediation with ILA (Independent Legal Advice) alone is an option. Once you have created a memorandum of understanding in a Mediation process, you can take that document to a family lawyer for ILA.

This is not the same thing as hiring a lawyer on retainer for a “court battle”, and it’s important to choose a lawyer who’s aligned with your goals to keep the process moving as smoothly as possible towards that legally binding agreement.

Good ILA is meant to:
- ensure you have the information to make sure you made the best possible decisions;
- review the financial documents, make suggestions, and make sure you understand all of your responsibilities.

A settlement focused lawyer who provides ILA isn’t going to:
- upset the agreement you created in mediation;
- or push you into making a deal you don’t want to be a part of.

Please remember that you can choose to follow or not the legal advice you’re getting.

08/30/2023

Services for separating spouses with children. If you fit into one or more of these categories our approach to Family Mediation is right for you:

Low conflict - We both acknowledge our marriage is ending and want to work together for the benefit of our kids

Medium conflict - There is significant tension in the conflict between us, but we agree on some issues and want help resolving those we haven't settled

High conflict - communication is very difficult and unstable, or has broken down between us and we need help to break the impasse and stay out of the courts.

For more information or to book a free consultation visit http://www.alignedchoices.com/

08/30/2023

Trauma enters our lives without warning and echoes through our days and our relationships. Talking about it can help and finding the right person to start sharing your experiences with is possible.

08/27/2023

In today's Blog I address clients who may be surprised to know that for best results the Family Mediation process includes the advice and expertise of a Family Lawyer.

https://wp.me/pcDdlO-1Io Link to Blog

12/18/2021

12/18/2021

05/03/2021

In my recent interview with Four Columns for a Balanced Life, I discussed my take on how people can thrive after their separation. Please click the link below if you want to learn more. https://tinyurl.com/ej2d4h6w

02/17/2021

Today I am celebrating a first! Fatherly magazine has quoted me in an article about how couples can figure out a way to divide household tasks fairly between them. I am very happy about this and hope you will celebrate with me! https://tinyurl.com/1m92xruq

02/08/2021

Empathy is easy enough to spot when we have trust for those sharing space with us. But when chronic disagreement and firm judgements have become normal, adapting our view of empathy can promote self-care. Learn more @ alignedchoices.com/is-silence-a-sign-of-empathy/

01/27/2021

Being grateful helps with the healing process, replenishes the energy expended during stress, and allows you to act with empathy while finding a more peaceful path towards the most important plans you have for yourself, and your children.

12/09/2020

“Remind yourself, and others, that your needs are important too”.

12/02/2020

Emphasizing how you turned a setback in your plans into honest self-understanding, frees your perspective and opens you to new and greater opportunities in the future.

11/27/2020

This open letter is my invitation to anyone dealing with family conflict. My experiences with conflict resolution in my personal and professional life have given me clear perspective on how mediation supports honest and liberating discussions. Read more @ https://www.alignedchoices.com/post/a-message-to-anyone

There is no right or wrong way to think or feel while communicating with your spouse. Exploring your future plans and concerns with the other person in the mediation room after years of misunderstanding and lack of support may sound like an overwhelming proposition.

11/11/2020

Gratitude and giving are healing acts which free up the energy otherwise expended on stress. You will feel more confident and act with care in attaining the most important plans you have for yourself, and your children after separation.

11/04/2020

“Negotiating with your spouse during a can be a painful and frustrating process. It can also lead to positive conversations based on mutual respect based on your shared love for your children’s wellbeing” Read more @ https://www.alignedchoices.com/post/negotiating-tips-for-lasting-resolutions

During my family mediation practicum, I had the rare opportunity to learn from an exceptionally skilled mediator named Christine Kim. These tactics have been very useful to my clients because they give people who are feeling lost or unsure a way forward.