05/19/2024
When I was growing up, we didn’t have a lot of money. We had enough. My parents owned their home, we ate warm meals together as a family, we already had a computer when the internet came out, but the “money story” which was fed to me, was that there was never enough. (Is there ever?) I can’t even count how many times I heard: “we can’t afford that” when I asked for extras - like the cool blue jeans and sneakers, rather than off brand sort from K-mart. I was told that I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth - like it was a bad thing!
So I went to work. I never found it difficult to find a job that fit my needs. Once I set my mind on working somewhere, it wasn’t long before I was. When I finished high school, I started working for a major Canadian financial institution. I started as a bank teller and worked my way up to financial services advisor, helping people with loans, mortgages and investments.
I learned a lot. It is quite interesting to see the financial portfolio of a person, along side their physical persona. One of the things which really stuck with me was for the most part, people who look like they have a lot of money, really just have a lot of debt; and people who look very regular and unassuming, generally have a lot of money. It was all starting to seem like a big show. Maybe my parents were on to something.
I burned out at the bank, I knew my time was up but I didn’t know what to do next. One day, out of the blue it hit me: I want to sell cars! And so that’s exactly what I did. 6 weeks after making the decision to switch careers, I was hired at a Saturn SAAB Isuzu dealership, and sold 10 cars my first month. I was 23 years old. That year, my gross income was more than my fathers’. A part of me wanted to scream: “See how easy it is! All you have to do is put your mind to it! You were wrong! We CAN afford that, IF we want to!”
Those were big years for me. I really felt like I was winning. I drove a fancy car, I owned my own home, I started travelling, I could afford to buy designer dresses and Manolo Blahnik’s. But something was off.
Despite all the pleasures associated with it (did I mention I love cars?), I was beginning to realize that my job was conflicted with my core beliefs. Allow me to explain. Once my clients’ had about a year left on their car loan, I was expected to solicit them back, so they could start all over again. I had a huge problem with this. I knew that people are in debt up to their ears - and my job, just as they’re getting the chance to get their head above water - was to pull them back down? I don’t think so. I was really beginning to learn the ins and outs of colonial capitalist society and I wasn’t swallowing.
So I flipped my life upside down again and went back to school. That was about 15 years ago, and until recently I had been searching for a financial opportunity that met my needs on all levels. I love to learn, I love to travel, I love people, I love freedom! For a good few years, I worked hard in the service industry, saving up all I could just to jump on a plane and f**k off for the winter. That’s the closest balance I could find.
I also love to write, so that is what I do for the most part these days. I have found myself to be completely disenchanted by work that does not bring more benefit to people’s lives than it does harm - and I’m not just talking about money. I’m talking about global impact, positive change, community engagement with soulful people. It’s not that simple to find. It’s downright hard.
Now that I have my little family, I work hard to create that change for them. We try our best to reduce our toxic impact; we eat organic whenever possible; we have kept bees, and chickens, and a little a garden; I am learning about native plants and how they can help us to find balance in our health, but those choices don’t pay the bills. So, to be honest, this little digital marketing project that I am embarking on is my attempt to balance all of OUR needs. I’m so happy you’re along for the ride. Thanks for reading.
