03/09/2018
By Zahra Taha Ali
Blog link: https://www.facebook.com/thearchieffect/
POTTY TRAINING: What it taught me about parenting and life.
It was time we started shedding off the diapers and started toilet training my 2.5 year old. These kind of stories best be boring, if they are boring, there was definitely less work involved. If God forbid, they are interesting, then they would also be sad ( and messy and smelly and p**py) if I may say so. Unless it involves a toddler waking up one fine morning, taking off his diapers and sitting on the toilet seat, p**ping and informing you that he is successfully trained. That my dear, doesn't even come in the genre of fantasy. No seriously, never expect it and never believe it.
Ours was a jolly ride, I told him no diapers from today, and he ran behind me, naked with a diaper in hand for one hour, occasionally hitting me with it till I put it on. This went on for two days. We weren't allowed to remove the diaper by our toddler, unless we were ok with a diaper maniac on loose, which we weren't.
📝 LESSON NO. 1: Never let them get so big that they fall in love with a convenience. Once a child knows it is convenient they will get difficult in leaving it. Like adults, children enjoy being lazy.
On day 3, Papa was home. The weather changed, Pampers were carefully stacked away and child was left stranded without any instructions, other than the random playing of a song on YouTube,
" if you need to p*e , you tell mommy...." .
Ten mins later, toddler is found standing in a pool of you know what, crying. He called me, and I explained to him that "THIS" will happen if you don't tell mommy.
📝 LESSON NO 2: The most difficult of life lessons can be learnt if made to stand in your own s**t.
The next time my boy needed to p**p or p*e, he told me. I was shocked, and said Mashallah infinite times at his immediate learning and understanding. In one accident, this one was trained and knew the signs. Whole of Friday, we spent without wearing the diaper. The next day pappa went to office, I took off the diaper (put on for the night) but he refused to go to the toilet. Stood like stone and waged a war against the bathroom trip. We had multiple accidents that day, with the p**p and the p*e the mop wiped away my confidence with each sweep.
📝 LESSON NO 3: Just because things go well one day, doesn't mean apka time badal Gaya hai.
The next three days were spent in the battle of the bathroom trips. But I mastered on putting him on the seat and once there, bribed him with chocolates and surprises.
📝 LESSON NO 4: If your bribe dint work, you dint go high enough.
By the next weekend, we were successfully trained. My boy fell in love with those bathroom trips and some days we were doing a visit every 15 mins, just like that. I started having a rotator cuff pain in my shoulders.
📝 LESSON NO. 5: Be careful what you wish for- you might get an overload of it.
Lately, my son doesn't want to honor a diaper even if he's wearing it. At night or when out, we will say, “You have a diaper darling, don't worry.” But he insists he be taken to a washroom. Middle of the night, twice, thrice, four times. Yeah.. lucky us.
📝 LESSON NO. 6: If you word hard at something, it is bound to work out for you.
📝 LESSON NO. 7: No one is too young, too naive, too weak, too feminine, too masculine, too old, too not ready. Everyone deserves an opportunity to escape the bag of s**t they move around with.
My toddler has recently discovered the aim game. Doing in the seat is suddenly too boring-been there done that !!!!!
🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
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