11/11/2025
Making and having a child is the biggest financial decision if you are ever going to make, followed by marriage, and everything else after. As such, do not outsource them from anyone, in the form of influence, blackmail, or otherwise, at least from individuals who can barely keep their heads above water financially.
Many people have a poverty mindset, believing and subscribing to a socially-imposed pressure and time limit that pushes them into having children without the resources to care for them, under the idea that children will grow, when they as parents are barely making it. Many people are pressed from David Mashabela being a first-time father at 50, because he wanted to achieve certain goals, and reach financial stability ahead of parenthood. I have always subscribed to this mindset — planning all the way to the end and last detail. Having children is not simply drinking water, it's a major event, both physically and spiritually, and this context, financially. There isn't anything pretty with a life of lack, especially as a result of poor planning.
If you want your child to be in a classroom of 70 children, by all means have them without financial stability, if you feel your dreams are not important or urgent enough, or, you can risk and sacrifice your dreams by diverting all resources at your disposal towards parenthood, by all means, have children. Once you have a child, there are certain risks you can no longer take, women are risk averse by nature, and more so as mothers, they will choose safety any day, in the interest of the child. As a father, any risk you take towards pursuing your goals, will likely jeopardize your relationship with your spouse, because she always has the interest of the child first, despite the potential upside.
Life is not group work, and certainly not parenthood, in the planning stages, society, family, and even your spouse may make you believe so, until the child is born. You are going to be required to foot every cost
