Caren Austen Ink

02/08/2024

Such a cutie!

28/07/2024

Hahahahaha!

06/07/2023

13/06/2023

I have reached 100 followers! Thank you for your continued support. I could not have done it without each of you. Now, aiming for 1,000! 🤗🎉

26/03/2023

• An Oxford comma walks into a bar where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking ci**rs.
• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”
• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
• A question mark walks into a bar?
• A non sequitur
walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."
• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.
• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
• A synonym strolls into a tavern.
• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.
• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.
• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned a man with a glass eye named Ralph.
• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
• A dyslexic walks into a bra.
• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.
• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.
--Credit to The Writers Forum

15/11/2022

05/02/2022

In case you didn't already know, writers are known for our incomparable ability to procrastinate. Yesterday, I had a job for a non-profit to complete. I sat down to write around noon, then realized I was hungry for lunch. (I experienced exceptional hunger multiple times yesterday.) So, lunch. And, I sat down to write again. Then, I remembered I'd planned to do laundry. So, I stripped the bed, gathered up the towels and tossed them in the washer and sat down to write again. Of course, I was up and down multiple times to wash three loads of laundry. About that time, I realized I was quite sleepy. So, a nap was in order. Nap completed, I sat down to write, when the buzzer on the dryer buzzed. Well, you know, I really hate to leave my laundry to wrinkle, so I popped up to sn**ch it from the dryer, fold everything, and put sheets back on the bed and clothes in their proper places. Ahhh, a feeling of accomplishment. Now, to write. Gee, a hot chocolate sounds good. So, go to pull the electric kettle out of the pantry and make the perfect cup of hot chocolate. Ahhh, now to write. Oh, shoot! I haven't printed out the info docs and previous printed material to use as a guide. That would make this project so much easier to complete. So, I printed out everything I needed. Hmmmm . . . now my stomach was rumbling again. How could I write on an empty stomach? So, I heat up left-over pizza. Yum! Okay, now to write. Oh, but my dirty hot chocolate mug and my plate from the pizza are sitting in the sink, and I hate dirty dishes. If I get that out of the way, I can surely concentrate better on writing. Dishes done. Time to write. I mean, it's really time to write, because I have a deadline. This is to be in my client's inbox when she gets up in the morning. GOTTA WRITE!!! So, I write the opening paragraph, and my Apple watch reminds me it's time to stand, so I stand and figure, as long as I'm up . . . Okay, no more fooling around. I have to finish this!!! And, I start writing and writing and writing. Gee, that's exhausting. I take a break, because I haven't checked FB in a while. I have a new pic of my sweet Liam. Gotta post. Back to the project, and I complete another couple paragraphs. Oh! Gotta see how many responses I have to my post on FB! Okay, I have to finish this! After a few more hours, I finish at last. Whew. Now, to get ready for bed and allow my mind to dwell on other things for a bit, because I know I need to read what I wrote with fresh eyes to do the necessary editing. Now in my jammies, I sit down to re-read and edit. Wow! That was a good idea. Re-writes in order. Finally, satisfied with what I've written, I email it off, along with an invoice. (Perhaps, the most important writing I've done all day? 😁) Now, bedtime at last. Today, I woke up excited with the idea of a whole day with no obligations. I can devote all day to work on one of the two books I'm currently writing. But, you know, I noticed my bedside table, which guests can see all the way from the front door, is really cluttered. It should only take a few minutes to organize that, right? I have all day after all . . .

23/09/2021

Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.

10/02/2021

Ah, the tortured life of a writer.