12/05/2024
I can't hide the feeling of sadness that I have been enduring since the day that you left. I told myself that I would try to forget and unlove you, but I can't believe that I am still here, waiting for you. I am still hoping that you will come back, even though I don't even have any idea where you are right now. I told myself not to want you anymore, but the truth is, there is an urge in me that wants to beg you to stay by my side forever. I want you to love me the way I love you with all my heart, but I know that I cannot force you to feel the same way. I don't understand why I still keep waiting. I still keep holding on to what you promised me, because when you said that you would never leave me, I sincerely prayed that you would be faithful to your words. I have prayed for you to stay, even if the time comes where I have to push you away just to see you being afraid of losing me. But I don't know what happened to you. I don't understand why you have to hurt me this much when you said that I mean a lot to you.
You don't know how much I miss you, my love. I guess you don't even think about me right now. But even though I am hurting a lot because of your absence, why does it feel like I am still expecting you to come back and make everything right? Why do I keep expecting that you will still come back to love me better? It hurts me to miss you, without knowing if you still care about me too. Even if I try so hard to hide what I feel, the loneliness that I feel whenever I wake up still doesn't fail to remind me that I will never feel whole again without you.
