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23/04/2024

Hello 😍😎

LAUGH WITH ME😂😂Today, my 12 years old sis in jss2 came back from school feeling moody.... I was cooking when she entered...
19/04/2024

LAUGH WITH ME😂😂

Today, my 12 years old sis in jss2 came back from school feeling moody.... I was cooking when she entered and she didn't even greet me, she just went straight and layed on the bed facing the wall.

I pretended not to care as I focused on the beans I was cooking... When I was done, I dished the food and left hers covered on the dinning table then went to my room...

I came out few minutes past 6 and noticed the food was still there untouched, then I knew something was wrong.

I called her and asked wat happened. At first, she was reluctant in telling me but after much persuasion, she later told that she caught her boyfriend hugging another girl in class today. 12 years old already has a boyfriend?? Nawa

I pretended it wasnt that big deal so I could here the full gist... Just when I was about asking her how it happened, she interrupted with "I cant believe he'll do that to me, and we have been dating for 4 years o"

Me: 😲😳🧐🤥🙉🤷‍♂️🙆‍♂️🙅‍♂️
Well am still looking for where to faint cause our neighbor who overheard it fainted where I wanted to faint 🙆‍♂️

I am Oluwa Tobiloba
Although I am not the best I am among the best

Follow me abi shey I no dey try😭

Kindly follow me by tapping on the + button on my profile for more of my jokes😭

Tap👉 Äjãx øffïçîëlÄjãx øffïçîëlÄjãx øffïçîël

19/04/2024

I just want to be lonely 😥

Na only one girl in this world who is1 beautiful 😍2 honest 🤗 3 friendly 😘👫4 respectful 👌5 she don't like 💰6 she leaves a...
19/04/2024

Na only one girl in this world who is
1 beautiful 😍
2 honest 🤗
3 friendly 😘👫
4 respectful 👌
5 she don't like 💰
6 she leaves at Yaounde I don't know how to write it but I'm sure in at lampadaire🏘️
7 she is clean, awesome, etc
She loves me and I love her too 💓 like normally 💏👫
8 she's the only girl i will never forget and regret loving her 💔💕
9 I know some are jealous but i still love her 💕
10 I don't know how to thanks her u guys all know her her name is NJUMA SHINA she is all for I don't know how I can thanks u knowing u change my life knowing u change me i can't imagine my remaining life without you shina thanks for all accepting me thanks for loving me thanks for caring for me I pray God to give you peace, prosperity, happiness,joy, long life u shina Amen 🙏

13/04/2024

HELP ME! MY WIFE NEVER BELIEVE ME AGAIN 😭😭😭😭

My best friend bought a brand new car and called to inform me. I was so happy for him. I screamed on the phone in joy and told him I was coming right away.

When I got to his house, he threw the car key on me and told me to drive around and bring the car back to him.

"Omoh you mean am?" I asked in excitement.

He said yes.

I got into the brand new car and drove straight to my house to pick my wife. That was the only place I could drive to. I wanted her to enter a brand new car and feel the excitement.

When I drove into our compound, my wife ran out of the house. I saw the smiles on her face. She was just waiting for me to confirm it.

"I bought a new car baby."

She screamed for joy. Fell to the ground. Rolled in the compound and stood up again. She started singing "Narekelemo". All her face was smeared with dust. She had used her cloth to clean the floor. By the time she got up, she was looking like someone whom soldiers had beaten up with firewood.

I did not know how to tell her it was a joke anymore. She opened the car and entered. I also got into the car.

We started driving around Jos. We were just driving around without a destination. My wife was screaming in the car. She was Shouting like a terrorist. Dancing. Even touching my manhood with style.

After three hours, my friend called me to bring the car home so his Uncle could see.

That was how I took the next U-Turn and started driving to my friend's house. We got to his house and I alighted from the car. I handed the car key to my friend. My wife was still in the car looking at me.

My friend asked why my wife was still tying wrapper and why her face and hair was dusty. I told him she fell down why we stopped to buy something on the road. I begged him to go inside as she may be embarrassed if he came close.

He went in.

I walked to the car and told my wife to come down so we could climb Okada and go home.

The woman became surprised.

"What about

06/04/2024

😂IF U NO LAUGH WETIN U GAIN😂

1. Main reason why I have not travelled to abroad: “What if I get chased by a dog that doesn't understand Kai Kai Kai”. 😒🤭😂😂

2. Help me thank GOD oo, I now have a property abroad😇. My friend travelled to Canada with my earphone and charger 🤭😂😂

3. Do you know that...
90% of rubber bands on ladies hair are from stock fish, plantains and takeaway packs🏃🤭😂😂

4. Is it proper for a lady that has diabëtes to have sugar daddy 😒🤭
I don wärn Favour but she didn’t heed to it 😂😂

5. Employer: “Your CV says you are really quick at Maths, so what’s 8O×18
Applicant (Me): 98 ☺️
Employer: That’s not even close 🙄
Applicant (Me): “Yes but at least it was quick 🤷😇🤭😂😂

6. PRINCIPAL: “Why were you absēnt yesterday
ME: I attended a būrïal ma! 🥲
PRINCIPAL: Hmm! That will not stop me from punïshing you today. Now answer me; who dīēd ?
ME: “The first son of the cousin of my grandmother’s youngest nephew who is also the youngest step-brother to the woman who gave birth to my uncle’s youngest step-son and he also...
PRINCIPAL: Alright! Alright! Please! That’s enough! Just go to the class! 😒🤭😂😂

7. That moment you tried helping your mother shoūt your brother’s name and she be like “Ehh so you are here, come and go and fill this gas” 😳😭😂😂

8. I heard my neighbour Joshua & Nkechi child today singing: “Palent listen to ya shoedlen, we are the lizards of tomollow, cüm and pay our school figs, and give us the sun edumention...”😳
Chai!!! I just faintëd 😂😂

9. Up till today, nobody has explained to me why I wrote Junior WAEC 🙄😒😂

10. Having Grëedy friends is stressfül see me now I’m drinkïng Yoghurt in the Toilët 🥲🤭💔😂😂

11. You will screenshot an attire on Instagram that might cost 75k to sow, and you will be looking for innoçent tailors in your street to sow exactly that style with 1k, looking for tailors to ënd their Careers🙄🤭... Wicked people 😒😒😏

Abi I no try 😥

Kindly react and follow me for more 🙏👉 Doctor En

06/04/2024

🌝😁 KEEP SMILING CUTIE 😍😂

1. “It is better for Precious to disappoint you than Favour to kïll you”... 😒
I come in peacë 🤭����😂
2. Men like s*x
Men want s*x
Men cannot do without s*x
Potiphar’s wife that wanted to rapë Joseph nko, is she a man?😒 or even Favour that was seducïng me when I came to borrow note from her room? 🙄🤭😂😂
3. Fairly used 3 years relationshïp for Sale!🥲
Very close to marriage🥹
Neatly used and no Abortiön🙂
DM! If you’re interested...🤲
Serious buyer only 😒🤭😂😂
4. One lady somewhere is preparing motivational quotes to post tomorrow because her man hasn’t called her since yesterday...🤭😂😂
Favour I didn’t mention you oo 😒
5. “500 Level girl dey cook for 100 Level boy”...🥲😩
Omorr, this Yahoö sweet oo, shey person no go do like this...🙄🤭😂😂
6. You remember that serious relationship I was building with Favour 3 months ago, that one I told you about guys🥲 they have stolën the cement oo
7. 1000 ways to dïe in Nigerïa..🥲
✍️0001: “Mom is sweeping and you mistakënly step on the broom 😳����🤭😂😂
8. Me as a photographer: “Smile as if you love Tinubu 🤭😂😂
9. This cöuntry na something else oo, I buy Sardine today na ponmo I see 😳🥲🤭😂😂
10. This Nigerïan movie I’m watching now, one girl👱‍♀️ went to Babàlawó to make his ex boyfrīend 👱🏼‍♂️ run mäd, only to find out that the natïve doctor was the boy’s father🧔😳... Lemme not tell you what happened next 🤗😇
I’ll tell you in the next jokes episode on my Profile Timeline 🤭😂😂🥰
11. You are trying to go without reacting 🙄
It’s not fair oo 😢

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06/04/2024

1. I need to tell you a secret; look at 5.
2. The answer is.... look at 11.❤️
3. Don't get mad, look at 15.🔥
4. Calm down don't be mad, look at 13.😉
5. First look at 2.🥰
6. Dont be that angry look at 12.🕯️
7. I just wanted to say I LOVE YOU.😘
8. What I wanted to tell you is.. THE ANSWER IS ON 14.🤩
9. Be patient look at 4.😍
10. This is the last time I am going to do this look at 7.🥰
11. I hope you are not mad when I say this; look at 6.😟
12. Sorry look at 8.😟
13. Dont get mad, look at 10.😥
14. I dont know how to say this but look at 3.🥺
15. You must be really angry but look at number 9.....🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Please follow my up Äjãx øffïçîël

😍😍Äjãx øffïçîëlaÄjãx øffïçîëlw me 👉MÎĞÅ

06/04/2024

This evening, via WhatsApp

Me - (on my status) Love is just a stupid game.

Babe - (on her status) Some relationships are just waste

Ex - (messages me) Ah, what happen?

Me - Nothing o

Ex - Talk to me jhor

Me - Nothing. I'm not in the mood to talk

Ex - You know you can talk to me ba?

Me - I said nothing

Ex - (messages my babe) Sister, don't tell me you and Barnabas are fighting already

Babe - Mtcheeww, I should have listened to you sef

Ex - Gist me nau

Babe - Is it gist you want?

Ex - Oya sorry, sorry, I just want to know. You see that Barnabas is a very evil person.. Very bad person.

Me - (messages my ex) Good night

Ex - Goodnight dear. Please don't let my sister stress you. You deserve love. I love you.

Me - Thanks.

Ex - (Messages my babe) Baby sis talk to me nau.

Babe - I'd tell you when I get home. I'm done with this rubbish relationship.

Ex - Sorry Sister

Babe - Goodnight abeg. I'm not in the mood to even be online.

Ex - Sleep well baby, you deserve better

Babe - (goes offline)

Ex - (updates her status) Las las, na everybody go chop breakfast. Over joy wan wound me.

Babe - (from the bedroom) Barnabas come nau

Me - (walks to the bed)

Babe - What were you doing with my phone?

Me - I was bored so I used our phones to act like we were fighting on whatapp

Babe - Did my sister fall for it?

Me - Yes nau, she was messaging me thinking it was both of us...

Babe - I love you baby

Me - I love you too baby

Me and babe -

06/04/2024

This morning at the restaurant with my guy Reuben

Reuben - (beckons to the Waitress) Barnabas wetin you go chop?

Me - wo, I don't want to eat here, id buy something else when we leave here.

Reuben - Let's eat here, that Waitress, I dey try talk to her..

Me - That's why you've been eating here? To impress her? Wow.

Waitress - (walks up to us) Good day sirs.

Reuben - Porridge dey?

Waitress - Yes sir..

Reuben - Bring one plate for me and rice for my friend Barnabas.

Waitress - Him no want porridge too?

Reuben - He doesn't eat yam

Waitress - Oh.. Okay (goes and comes back with our food)

Reuben - (begins to eat) Barney you don't know what you're missing in yam sha.

Me - Abi..

Reuben - (eating slowly)

Me - Why are you picking your food?

Reuben - (refuses to look up) she dey look me ba?

Me - Yeah...

Reuben - Today yam no too sweet sha..

Me - Really?

Reuben - Yeah.. Be like she rush today or something

Me - Wait, she's the one that cooks too?

Reuben - Just the porridge sha..

Me - Tor.

Reuben - (continues to eat gently and slowly)

Waitress - (walks to us) Omo enh... I just dey like watch you eat Oga Reuben

Reuben - na so I dey eat for house sha..

Waitress - E dey sexy sha.. As you dey take your time..

Me - Well,

Reuben - (uses his leg to kick me under the table)

Me - Ahhh!!

Waitress - What happened?

Me - Why you dey kick me Reuben? I just want to say you don't use to eat like that at home na, I wasn't going to tell her that you said the yam she cooked today is not sweet nau

Reuben -

06/04/2024

😂AFRICAN IS FULL OF WAHALA😂...............................................................

There's nothing you can do that'll satisfy them 😥😥😥😥😥
She's getting married, What does the husband do for a living?
(Is it your marriage?, He lives for a living)🤔🤔

That her husband no fine.
(Are you his wife?? Eyes of the gods??)🙄🙄

The husband is older than her.
(Is she marrying your father??)😏😏

The husband looks short and broke.
(Oya go and marry your own Goliath)😮😮

Is not by expensive weddings ooh hope they last.
(Are you God? Are you the one that knows the end from the beginning?☹☹.

No wonder she's just feeling her self, because she want to Marry.
(I see you, keeper of the flame)☹☹.

Ahh, She just finished serving (Nysc) she no go find work do? Na to go Marry?
(Hanty, Provider of our Daily bread)😏😏

How long have they known each other.
(Osheyyy! accurate time keeper, Destiny Changer)🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Can she still give birth.?
(I see you fertility doctor, Daughter of Fruitfulness)😯😯

Is he aware that she was a runs girl.
(Chioma Jesus, Mediator of all saints, Assistant Jesus)😌😌😌

Is not just to rush into marriage at early stage
(Go and ask your mom how old she was when she married your dad??)😒😒😒

Then finally they will sum it up.
Am happy for them shaa.
Na wah ooo, this Life ehhh😕
Nobody knows tomorrow oo🤪

Hanty you are not happy, and you are jealous, be happy for people so good things will come for you too, stop looking for fault in other people's relationship and mind your business

Congratulations is enough.😏
Find your own peace.
Be Genuinely happy for people🙄
©️näzzyjñr😆

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