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My mom came over with fresh cut flowers yesterday, a hug, and a "What can I do? What do you need?"She knows I'm struggli...
24/07/2024

My mom came over with fresh cut flowers yesterday, a hug, and a "What can I do? What do you need?"

She knows I'm struggling with caregiver burnout, and is always an ear, and a hand too. Today she watched Beau for a few hours so I could go to a meeting. I'm so thankful for her.
....

Something about Beau: he has a great sense of humor, is very funny, and loves to be silly and laugh. Yesterday I told him to tell Grandma bye & give her a kiss, and he instead kissed the flowers. We laughed and I said "not the flowers...Grandma!" With a twinkle in his eye and many giggles, he kissed them again repeatedly.

21/07/2024

"no more sorrow and pain...."

We did a thing today; we took Beau to church for the first time in a long time. Vacation Bible School was this (last) week and today was a little presentation and songs. Brinna helped lead praise & worship at VBS (the days she wasn't sick 😔) so she had practiced her songs a lot at home leading up to it. Beau learned right alongside her and would often get out his play guitar. After the beginning part of the video, you can still see him mouthing many of the words 🥰.
He lasted about 55 minutes in church, I call that a win!

We got some big news yesterday - Beau was offered a spot in the full day class at the Special Learning Center for the up...
19/07/2024

We got some big news yesterday - Beau was offered a spot in the full day class at the Special Learning Center for the upcoming school year. We are thankful for this unexpected opportunity, and although we/he love our local school, we and his team there are in agreement this will be great for him. This is new for the SLC, the first year they will have one class that is there all day.

The plan for this upcoming year had been for him to attend SLC for morning class four days a week, and our local school district in the afternoons five days a week. He will now be there 4 full days, and will attend our at our local school for only 3 hours a week. These few hours will allow him to keep familiarity there, keeping next/future years in mind, as he will age out of SLC. This too will allow him to have some of his language therapy minutes with a speech therapist he has been working with since he was three that he has a good working relationship with.

4 and a half weeks left of summer break. This is my favorite picture of him so far. 💙

I did not know when first embarking on the road of life alongside autism that one day I would have to carry produce from...
12/07/2024

I did not know when first embarking on the road of life alongside autism that one day I would have to carry produce from the refrigerator and kitchen counters to other rooms of the house with me. Nope, couldn't have predicted that one. But, here we are 🥴😂. I'm glad God has blessed me with humor so that I don't completely go mad.

Beau likes to peel potatoes, as I've shared before. Here's the thing...when he likes something...he loves it, he's obsessed with it. He is so hyper-fixated on peeling cucumbers, potatoes, anything he can, and using butter knives to chop that and other things into tiny pieces. He is also obsessed with unpeeling cuties/oranges but will not eat them, just continues to want more to peel.

This isn't the greatest hobby when groceries cost approximately $6,723 a week. 🫠

Dude works quick, too. This is after a trip to the restroom and brushing my teeth, etc. Maybe he'll have a future job in food prep. 😏

05/07/2024

Over the years, we have been delighted to feature Del Bigtree, Dr. Judy Mikovits, Dr. Brian Ho**er, Dr. Andrew Wakefield, and so many more. These renowned autism advocates and experts have presented on the AutismOne stage and are now featured on AutismOne’s AO OnDemand.

From July 7th to July 14th, you can access valuable insights for free!

These presentations offer invaluable scientific insight for the purpose of supporting individuals with autism.

Register now to gain access to this amazing presentation delving deep into the science!

Visit OnDemand.autismone.org

04/07/2024

🔸 Mycotoxins: The Hidden Cause of Inflammatory Illness with Julie Logan, DC

⏺️ RECORDED VIRTUAL EDUCATION EVENT
🗓️ July 1-31, 2024
https://tacanow.org/event/mycotoxins-the-hidden-cause-of-inflammatory-illness/
📲🖥️TACA website
https://tacanow.org/monthly-learning-series-pans-pandas/

Mycotoxin exposure is more common than previously thought, and in genetically susceptible individuals, can lead to crippling illness, including worsening neuroimmune conditions such as PANS/PANDAS. Biotoxin mediated illness can look and act just like Lyme disease, and often goes along with, or is caused by, a Lyme infection. Unresolving inflammation and severe symptoms in many body systems is the hallmark of this disease, earning the name Chronic Inflammatory Response Syndrome (CIRS). We are discovering more and more frequently that many of our patients with severe inflammation, allergies, compromised immune function, Mast Cell Activation Disorders, Autism, Pandas, Lyme diagnoses, etc are actually in a mold exposure that has been undetected, creating the inflammatory storm that underlies many of these conditions. In this discussion Dr, Logan will discuss the discovery, diagnosis and treatment of this illness, and discuss its possible relationship to PANS/PANDAS as well as its role in Autism severity.

For best results, please use chrome or safari web browsers.

If any local business could use some kitchen help peeling potatoes, I know a guy who would love that job! 😉Beau LOVES to...
04/07/2024

If any local business could use some kitchen help peeling potatoes, I know a guy who would love that job! 😉

Beau LOVES to peel potatoes. He has been doing this all summer. It's kind of to a point where I'm trying to hide them because he can go overboard.

Over the weekend, my husband was working on something in the yard while me and our daughter were at church. Beau pulled his hand and led him into the house where on the counter lay two potatoes he had peeled, and a bag of frozen green beans. "French fries. Green beans."

He was telling him he wanted some homemade french fries and green beans for lunch.

He ate heaps of green beans, which blew our minds. 🤯

I took his picture with one of his potatoes today, and he had to ham it up for the selfies 😄😍

02/07/2024

Beau can swing now! He has swung on his stomach for a couple of years, and just kind of sat on a swing moving his hips a little. So exciting 🤗. Makes us happy to see him to this with his sister.

Since the fall, he has gained the ability to put on his own pull -up, he started drawing "smiley faces" suddenly, became able to dress himself, put on his own shoes, pedal a bike/tricycle, ride a scooter, and swing. I'm sure I'm missing some other motor skills type skills. I attribute the rapid changes to discovering and addressing mycotoxins (mold toxicity).

Shortly after this video, he turned around and noticed the sky and said "rainbow!". We explained that it was a sunset 😄❤️

28/06/2024

Beau doesn't participate in Bible lessons and Children's Church, VBS, etc. with his peers, but as his Mom I can meet him where he is at - and it's a blessing to do so. He loves to pray, he loves children's praise and worship music, and he likes the "Baby's First Bible" storybooks.

I love how interested he was here, hearing about how Jesus is the good shepherd. I know Jesus loves this little sheep (Beau) even more, much more than I could; and I can trust in that. ❤️

"I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me - just as the Father knows me and I know the Father - and I lay down my life for the sheep." - John 10:14-15

16/06/2024

THIS.

Beau ate peas this evening. Whaaaat is happening?!Since starting a new supplement, he has tried and ate: pickles, tacos ...
13/06/2024

Beau ate peas this evening. Whaaaat is happening?!

Since starting a new supplement, he has tried and ate: pickles, tacos (meat + taco seasoning and the shell), rice, green beans, one piece of cantaloupe, and now peas. I cannot even begin to tell you what a big deal this is; and for it all to happen in a short amount of time. 🤯

Starting Ubiquinol is the only thing that's changed, and after this big of a difference, and in this timeframe, I know it has to be linked to that. Of course, the years worth of gut and overall health work have helped get us here too.

I did not expect Ubiquinol to help in this area and left me scratching my head at first. We started this based off his Mitoswab results, that gave us a more detailed look at his mitochondrial dysfunction. We've also known he has oxidative stress. This would help him, I knew/hoped, but this area has taken me by surprise! But, believe me, I'll take it! 🙌🏻

Thanks as always to our amazing Dr. Sonia ODonnell McGowin / Covenant Pediatric Wellness Center for helping us so much on our journey ❤️

12/06/2024

I'm assuming they talk about sitting "criss-cross applesauce" at Beau's new school; he was saying it to himself this morning as he sat down to watch some cartoons. I repeated it and sat down and showed him my legs sitting that way. He looked at me, amazed and surprised, like 'how does she know about this?!' 😆😅

His voice is the sweetest, and I will never tire of hearing it. 😭❤️

If you're familiar with autism then you know how common extreme picky eating/very limited foods is. Beau hasn't eaten a ...
08/06/2024

If you're familiar with autism then you know how common extreme picky eating/very limited foods is. Beau hasn't eaten a vegetable since he was a baby, unless it was mixed in something (homemade popsicles, smoothies, chopped up spinach in eggs, etc.)

Today, he ate his FIRST VEGETABLE since he was a baby!!! I cannot believe this really happened! Two whole green beans! Rejoice with me! 😭🙌🏻

In the last month, he has tried and ate: pickles, tacos (taco meat and shell), rice, and now he has had two green beans. This is after literal YEARS of never eating a new food in general (unless it's a new Simple Mills cookie or something like that 😏).

Oh how I hope this continues. We have worked so hard for years on his gut.

07/06/2024

I have to share another video with y'all. I cannot believe I actually captured this, because I rarely take the time to take a video. I'm so glad I did!

Beau does this thing where he will say he is something, for example in the bath, a jellyfish. He likes me to say very incredulously "you're not a ____, you're a boy!"
This week he was saying in a high pitched voice "I'm an angel!" I tried to get a video of him saying it, and even though he didn't say it the same way, he was saying it. I tried to do the game he likes, but then he went and said this and shocked me. 😭

He is so smart, and like my mom said "he knew exactly what he was saying. He was giving you a compliment and he knew it."

04/06/2024

My new favorite word Beau says: hippopotamus 🦛😄

Today was Beau's second day at SLC, but his first day of school transportation. He has an hour long commute there, and b...
29/05/2024

Today was Beau's second day at SLC, but his first day of school transportation. He has an hour long commute there, and back.

His driver is the sweetest, and has been hands down the best person they could have hired to do this job this summer. I'm blown away by how above and beyond she has taken this responsibility, of him and one other student. What a blessing! She called me this morning after they arrived, and told me all about how it went on the way. She said he did amazing, never cried, and happily sang the whole way (I sent some children song CD's). When they arrived, he spotted a vehicle that looked like mine, and asked "Mommy?" but didn't get upset when he realized it wasn't me. He sang happily the whole way home and never cried, and clapped his hands and said "Yayyy!" when they got near the school. He saw my car (for real this time) and said "Mommy!"

Brinna, Beau's big sister, had a really hard time initially when it was decided he would be going to this new school this summer and next year. There was a lot of crying and worry. She said, among other things, "Ok, it's your and Dad's decision, but if he goes, I'm going too!" We did a lot of reassurance, talking through it, and praying. She accepted it, but still hasn't liked to talk about it too much.

Today when his driver called to tell me how good he did, she made this drawing as we were talking. The picture was sent home from his pre-school the last week of school, and she had asked if she could have it to hang up on her desk in her room. She said the drawings on it are things that remind her of Beau. "He is my sunshine, and rainbow. He loves to act like a pig and say pig noises. He loves cupcakes. This is me and him together."

"Beau is allright and I knoe it." ❤️

Today was Beau's first day at The Special Learning Center. He will attend their summer school for a few hours a day, sev...
28/05/2024

Today was Beau's first day at The Special Learning Center. He will attend their summer school for a few hours a day, several days a week, for a few weeks. I'm grateful for this opportunity this summer to help ease him into his routine that will begin in August with a split day between schools.

He was happy at drop-off, so excited he ran straight into the building, actually! But, he got scared once it set in and had an emotional day, kind of a rollercoaster of up and down. He played a lot outside on the playground and enjoyed that and their tricycles. The staff are pros at handling this transition time with patience and distractions. He was crying when I picked him up and said "all done" through tears as I put him in his carseat.

Bless his heart, it's going to be hard at first, but I'm pretty confident he is going to love it once he is used to it. I know he is confused, even though I've explained to him many times, and he will say things back like "new school" and smiles when I say there will be new teachers and friends. "Kids" he will say.

Tomorrow also begins school transportation, for the commute from our town and back. That adds another level of things for him to try to understand.

On we go, I know it's going to lead to great things!
😊🤍

25/05/2024

Absolutely true.

21/05/2024

WE HAVE AMAZING NEWS!!!

Beau was awarded one of the 2024 TACA National Medical Scholarships in the amount of $1,500! Praise God and thank you to TACA ( The Autism Community in Action ) and their donors! Beau was a recipient last year as well, and we couldn't be more thankful.

These funds help us as we treat Beau from a holistic/functional medical approach. Tragically, our mainstream medical model does next to nothing for children diagnosed with autism and co-occuring conditions... and parents pursuing true medical care for their children pay for these things out of pocket. This is why organizations like TACA are so important.

More amazing news-
In the last couple of weeks, Beau has learned to pedal his tricycle! He has been doing the "Flintstone feet" approach for a very long time. It just "clicked" one day. He is really riding now! So proud!

Today was Beau's last day of (morning) school before summer break! But in a week and a half, he will start at The Specia...
17/05/2024

Today was Beau's last day of (morning) school before summer break! But in a week and a half, he will start at The Special Learning Center for their summer program. It is only about 3.5 weeks, 4 days a week, in the mornings only. Come August, he will continue there for his mornings, and our local school district for the afternoon.

Days like today can be hard for many of us who have children with special needs who are in this transition time, and we don't know what they understand, or know they don't understand. It makes me sad to think about him missing school and everyone there and not getting what is going on. It's also hard to have any help we have removed for a few months.

I will say, what a wonderful thing, to have a place he can go to (miss) that he loves and works so well with/for him! Thank God for that!

Onto some summer memories...as his shirt says "Let's Gooooo! ☀️

When I saw this shirt I had to buy it because it's something his big brother always says 😂

Beau woke me up at about 4:45 this morning asking to pray. I thought he was saying he wanted to go play, and I told him ...
08/05/2024

Beau woke me up at about 4:45 this morning asking to pray. I thought he was saying he wanted to go play, and I told him later, and to go to sleep. He repeated it again, saying "I want pray" (which sounds kind of like like "E won payy"). So we prayed. I don't know what was going on in his mind at this early hour, but I praise God he finds comfort in the name of Jesus. ❤️

IEP day. While it actually stands for Individualized Education Plan, I've heard a couple play on words used such as: "I ...
30/04/2024

IEP day.

While it actually stands for Individualized Education Plan, I've heard a couple play on words used such as: "I Expect Progress" or "I Encourage Progress".

Progress has definitely been made this year. Do we have a long ways to go and some not so positive stuff? Oh yes, 💯 percent. (Especially at home...). But we are all encouraged and very happy about his "immense progress".

The biggest factor in his progress since the fall has been discovering and treating Beau for mold toxicity. He is still continuing treatment and will be a long road. It has been one of the most difficult things to walk through. We moved out of our home for two months. We threw away many things we felt we couldn't clean properly. We spent money we didn't have to remediate our home, nothing is covered by insurance. My husband barely got to see the kids during that time while he worked his job and on our home. We moved back in. We still have things on our to-do list to do. Beau has a regimen of things he takes, one that I recently increased.

As soon as he began treatment and we moved out, we saw changes. The school saw obvious changes and were stunned. They were meeting me at the door at pick up with wide eyes, describing how he was doing. It has been financially, mentally, emotionally draining...but it's all been worth it. We pray he continues to respond and his numbers come down.

Yesterday I had such a sweet moment, and some comedic relief after a long, hard week with Beau. Laughter is one of God's...
28/04/2024

Yesterday I had such a sweet moment, and some comedic relief after a long, hard week with Beau. Laughter is one of God's greatest gifts and in our life alongside autism, I cherish it all the more.

One of the many behaviors he has had is trying to bring his outdoor tricycles inside to ride. I will repeatedly tell him they are *outside toys* and being as stubborn as stubborn can get, he will have hour long tantrums at a time, trying to get it through the back door.

Yesterday afternoon Beau's big brother took him outside so I could get some housework done. They returned as I was scrubbing the floors. I heard my daughter's voice yell out "Mommy, we have something for you!" Moments later, Beau appears; in just his T-shirt, pull-up, AND his dirty boots, stomping towards me. "Take off your boots, please!" No use, he keeps coming towards me. That's okay, because in his hand is a bouquet of flowers. He hands them to me! I make a big deal of it, and it IS a big deal to me, because my other kids tell me for the most part, he did this on his own. He picked a flower and they said something to him about taking it to Mommy. He keeps going with it and later walks it in and hands it to me himself without being told to. My first bouquet from him 💖.

I put them on the counter and took a picture, but I didn't have time to put them in water yet/ just then. About five minutes later, Beau grabs the flowers from the counter and starts walking towards the back door.

"Wait! What are you doing with Mommy's flowers?" I asked him.

He stopped in his tracks. Looking at me, he replies, "Outside flowers." He proceeds to walk outside and set the flowers on the ground outside.

OK, then. 😂 As my seven year old daughter says, I think he was "using my words against me".

19/04/2024

Today was originally Beau's Kindergarten registration appointment, and although he wouldn't be having the typical Kindergarten experience next year, he would officially be in that grade and receiving full time services at the local school district.

However, after speaking with his team and administration at school, we've recently had a big change in plans. Next year, he will still receive a 'full' day as we planned, but instead he will be attending the Special Learning Center, located an hour away, for their morning classes; and in the afternoon he will have another year in the pre-school room at our actual school. He has been in this room since the day after he turned three, for three hours a day. For those not familiar with our very rural area, the hour commute (one way - two hours total drive time) is probably pretty jarring. Of course it is not ideal, but things look different for us in rural areas in regards to services...and sometimes it's our best option.

The Special Learning Center has a wonderful reputation, and I've never ever heard a single negative word about them. Before I had Beau, I worked for the Missouri Schools for the Severely Disabled. I would help give tours to parents of incoming students and sometimes this was a young child coming over from SLC, and a staff member from there would come with them on the tour, to help in the transition. I went and toured SLC in regards to my own child a couple weeks ago. A strange feeling, to say the least.

There are still some specifics to work out, but this is the plan. It is a big change, and certainly scary, but we are praying it will be a great experience for him and the added year will give him more time to progress. No matter the official "grade" level, etc., that's all we want for him! ❤️

I snuck this video of him reading a book to himself. I could listen to him all day. 🤗

Beau hyper-fixates on different things, and these obsessions can really affect his daily living and quality of life. At ...
16/04/2024

Beau hyper-fixates on different things, and these obsessions can really affect his daily living and quality of life.

At times, they make him happy, make us so happy to see him happy, and have no negative consequences. It's a beautiful thing to see him happy, and his joy is just so much....more....joy than most people's joy. If you know you know.

Oftentimes though, the hyper-fixations can cause him anxiety, major upset, and even what appears to me as intrusive thoughts.

He has been obsessed with chickens and turkeys for some time now. Adding to it in the past week, is barns and sheds. Last night he was sobbing uncontrollably about wanting to see a shed. This comes from us telling him something he sees out the car window isn't a chicken house, it's a shed. Now it has been added into the loop. He will sob uncontrollably and completely lose control as he will scream at bedtime for example, "See chickens! See turkeys!" I remind him we have already seen them that day, and that it is dark and time for him and the chickens and turkeys to go to sleep. We pray and cuddle and he will eventually calm down. A couple of times, he has opened the bedroom window, looked at me while crying about it, in a way that said 'please stop me, I'm going to jump' (wanting to elope to find chickens and turkeys). He has eloped, during the daytime, once, and got a distance down our road; all on a mission to go to the next road over to some turkey barns. It was a traumatic, scary time; of course we are just glad he is okay. Yesterday he was riding his tricycle in the driveway and looked at me, then the road, grinned and said, and I quote: "Bike. Road. Turkeys." He had his mischievous, teasing expression on his face, and there was no anxiety in him. I was floored at the verbal outlined "sentence" and filled with amazement and thankfulness for that, while also continuing this overwhelming feeling dealing with this obsession.

Today, he didn't get a good enough look at a nearby barn he likes to point at on the way home and said: "Please. Mommy. *Long pause.* See barn."
I can't even believe this spontaneous speech he is putting together!

This picture was taken recently when we visited a nature center. He got to see a turkey up close from a wall of windows. He was peaceful, and so very happy. It was a good day. ❤️

Always remember: "Just because someone has difficulty communicating, that doesn't mean they have nothing to say." This w...
06/04/2024

Always remember: "Just because someone has difficulty communicating, that doesn't mean they have nothing to say."

This week we were in another town about 30 minutes from home. This is a town with a community pool, and we go there a few times each summer. Otherwise, Beau is never there. This week though he came along with me for somewhere I had to be in that area, and he looked at me as we were pulling away and whined a bit and said "swimmin'." He was wanting to go swimming, and he knew exactly where he was.

Last week, when we turned right at a fork in the road to head to another city, he looked left, where we would need to turn to go to the pool town. He whined and said the same thing.

He has an incredible memory, and he knows so much more than anyone knows, he just has trouble communicating it. It is an amazing thing to see some of his thoughts come out as his speech progresses. And boy, is he ready for summer. 🌊

Beau has been crying at morning pre-school for me for the past week and a half, just very emotional about it. This is ne...
04/04/2024

Beau has been crying at morning pre-school for me for the past week and a half, just very emotional about it. This is new, he has never done this before. He has always loved going (even though that doesn't mean he is easygoing and complies with everything, he still has loved going). Throwing huge tantrums and screaming, and crying, are normal for him but this is sad, emotional tears and not behaviors. I know it has nothing to do with school itself or staff or students. His staff is amazing and they are so sweet, supportive, and caring about this issue! My Mama heart hurts, and I can't stand to think of it; on the other hand, this could be a very good thing. I believe, as does his MAPS doctor, that this is a developmental milestone he missed that he is simply going through. Beau just turned 5, but it is what you typically see with a young toddler if they go to daycare, etc. With children like Beau that have a developmental delay, their timeline does not look like other kids.

I homeschool Beau's older sister, and I'm all about mothers being with their kids as much as possible. As much as I love homeschooling, it surprises some people that I do send Beau to school part-time and plan to send him to full days next year. Although MANY autistic children thrive with homeschooling, for the foreseeable future this is not what I feel is best for Beau or our family. Ironically, he is going through this as we are preparing to have his IEP meeting which will involve the huge transition from 3 hour days without me to a full 8 to 3 next year. Of course, by that time this phase could be long gone. But for now it is bad timing to be dealing with these emotions.

Today, he got to skip class and spend the day with Mommy since big sister has co-op and I didn't have an afternoon caregiver for him. He is enjoying YumEarth (dye free) suckers and just chilling. He loves to laugh, tease and be silly; he holds up an orange sucker and says "yellow!" so that I will say "that's not yellow, that's orange!" & he laughs and laughs.

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