eTruePolitics.com

  • Home
  • eTruePolitics.com

eTruePolitics.com Fake News ... and proud of it. eTruePolitics.com: the universe's most trusted name in politics
(9)

Trump Family Claims Parking Problems Prevent Them From Attending Trialhttps://etruepolitics.com/trump-family-claims-park...
02/05/2024

Trump Family Claims Parking Problems Prevent Them From Attending Trial
https://etruepolitics.com/trump-family-claims-parking-problems/

  New York (eTruePolitics) – Donald Trump Jr. unleashed a fierce attack on the "Marxist media" in an exclusive interview with eTruePolitics today, claiming that the only reason he hasn't been attending his father's historic criminal trial was because he hasn't been able to find a parking space. "...

02/05/2024

"Being dumb's just about the worst thing there is when
it comes to holding high office." - Harry S. Truman

"The worst thing a man can do is go bald." - Donald J. Trump

Eric Trump Confirms Being Paid $50 to Attend Father’s Trial
02/05/2024

Eric Trump Confirms Being Paid $50 to Attend Father’s Trial

New York (eTruePolitics) – “$50 dollars is $50 dollars,” shrugged Donald Trump’s son Eric in confirming a report that he was paid to attend his father’s Manhattan criminal trial. In a related story, eldest son Don Jr. was said to have turned down an offer to make an appearance. “Don, Jr....

30/04/2024

All women are human beings.
Kristi Noem is a woman.
Hence, Kristi Noem is a human being.

(WARNING: The claims contained in this syllogism have been known to cause vomiting.)

20/04/2024

Quote of the day:

From a perspective juror in the Trump trial.: “I wouldn’t believe Trump if his tongue was notarized.”

She was excused.

Marjorie Taylor Greene Calls for Russia’s Admission to the Union as the 51st State https://etruepolitics.com/mtg-russia/...
19/04/2024

Marjorie Taylor Greene Calls for Russia’s Admission to the Union as the 51st State https://etruepolitics.com/mtg-russia/

Washington (eTruePolitics) – She loves borscht? How else to explain Rep Marjorie Taylor Greene’s call for Joe Biden to “immediately” grant statehood to Russia as the 51st state of the Union? “This makes sense to me,” Greene crowed. “Russia’s great, lots of bigots, not too many homos....

Putin Set To Name Trump King of Ukraine; Diet Coke Shortage Could Scuttle Dealhttps://etruepolitics.com/trump-king-of-uk...
18/04/2024

Putin Set To Name Trump King of Ukraine; Diet Coke Shortage Could Scuttle Deal
https://etruepolitics.com/trump-king-of-ukraine/

Moscow, Kyiv (eTruePolitics) – EXCLUSIVE: Russian President Vladimir Putin is set to name former U.S. president Donald Trump to the newly formed position of King of Ukraine as soon as Russia completes its coup of the Eastern European nation, according to Kremlin sources. Aides to Trump say he like...

Supreme Court Justice Amy Barrett Tells Trump He’s UntouchableWashington (eTruePolitics) – Ahead of two upcoming Trump r...
17/04/2024

Supreme Court Justice Amy Barrett Tells Trump He’s Untouchable

Washington (eTruePolitics) – Ahead of two upcoming Trump related cases, Supreme Court associate justice Amy Barrett has reportedly assured the former president that since his name does not appear anywhere in the Constitution he can never be convicted of anything.

A so-called “originalist” interpreter of the Constitution, Barrett had previously told her GOP fellow-travelers that it is not her job to interpret the intention of the founders when they wrote the Constitution.

“My husband tells me what to do,” said Barrett, “not the Constitution.”

https://etruepolitics.com/trump-constitution/

Putin Offers Trump A Look-a-Like "Just in Case"
16/04/2024

Putin Offers Trump A Look-a-Like "Just in Case"

Moscow (eTruePolitics) – "Jail will kill him," said Russian president Vladimir Putin in offering former president (of the United States) Donald Trump a look-a-like to serve any upcoming jail terms. Details of how and where the switch will occur are being negotiated with a demand by the potential s...

Das vadanya democracy.Putin Wing of Republican Party Unveils New Symbol
10/04/2024

Das vadanya democracy.

Putin Wing of Republican Party Unveils New Symbol

Washington (eTruePolitics) - In a yet another attempt to ingratiate himself with the far right wing of the GOP, House Speaker Mike Johnson unveiled a proposed new GOP symbol for the party to a chilly reception, which included boos and hisses, at a Arizona donor fundraiser Tuesday night. Johnson was....

Trump to Narrate Bible Bedtime Stories on New Prayer Podcast
27/03/2024

Trump to Narrate Bible Bedtime Stories on New Prayer Podcast

Palm Beach, FL (eTruePolitics) -“Donald Trump’s Bible Bedtime Stories”, a new prayer podcast produced by “PillowTalk”, a just launched division of Trump Media & Technology Group, will be the ex-president’s first foray into voice-over work in what promises to become a media empire. Inspir...

Trump Reportedly Unable To Pay His “Massive” Testosterone Bill
23/03/2024

Trump Reportedly Unable To Pay His “Massive” Testosterone Bill

Palm Beach, FL (eTruePolitics) – If life wasn’t difficult enough for Donald Trump now come reports that he is unable to afford his daily testosterone supplement. Sources close to Nugenix, the ‘Testosterone Booster’ sold over the counter and primarily marketed to aging men to enhance their fl...

The US Women's National Team defeated a talented Brazil team 1-0 last night in the Championship Final of the inaugural, ...
11/03/2024

The US Women's National Team defeated a talented Brazil team 1-0 last night in the Championship Final of the inaugural, hemisphere-wide, W Gold Cup Tournament. So proud of my midfielder niece Sam who started again, as she has throughout the tourney, and had an awesome performance yesterday. (She was second on the team in minutes played for the entire tournament.)

Happy campers: parents Denise and Wayne on the pitch with no. 17.

The Associated Press Sports Editors (APSE) just released their nominations for the best sports writing of the year:. So ...
29/02/2024

The Associated Press Sports Editors (APSE) just released their nominations for the best sports writing of the year:. So pleased and proud that my niece Alex Coffey has been nominated in the the 'Long Feature' category of the '2023 APSE Contest' for her touching Philadelphia Inquirer story about Preston Mattingly, his mom and famous dad (Don) and alcoholism. It's a story about hope. Congratulations Alex, amazing work.

https://www.inquirer.com/phillies/philadelphia-phillies-alcoholism-bulimia-recovery-farm-director-20230510.html

LONG FEATURE
Alex Coffey, The Philadelphia Inquirer

The Phillies’ farm director admires the person his mother has become after overcoming some dark days. And they made that journey together.

All men are human beings. Mike Johnson is a man. Hence, Mike Johnson is a human being.  (Warning: The claims contained i...
23/02/2024

All men are human beings.
Mike Johnson is a man.
Hence, Mike Johnson is a human being.

(Warning: The claims contained in this syllogism have been known to cause vomiting.)

https://etruepolitics.com/gop-piggies/

Alina Habba and Donald Trump In Happier Timeshttps://etruepolitics.com/alinehabba/The good times are all gone and you’re...
01/02/2024

Alina Habba and Donald Trump In Happier Times
https://etruepolitics.com/alinehabba/

The good times are all gone and you’re fired.

Photo illustration by Ray Dougela

The good times are all gone and you're fired.       Photo illustration by Ray Dougela

02/09/2023

"Being dumb's just about the worst thing there is when it comes to holding high office." - Harry S. Truman

"The worst thing a man can do is go bald." - Donald J. Trump

(Epigraph courtesy of Andy Borowitz's spectacular "Profiles In Ignorance.")

Financially Beleaguered Giuliani Moves Law Offices to Central Park Location
24/08/2023

Financially Beleaguered Giuliani Moves Law Offices to Central Park Location

New York (eTruePolitics) - Following today's booking in the Fulton County Jail, Rudy Giuliani flew back to his native New York where he immediately relocated his law offices to a "convenient and affordable" location according to a subdued Giuliani spokesperson. The former New York City mayor is repo...

28/07/2023

Washington (eTruePolitics) – The American Lemming Society today named Rep Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) its “Man of the Year” for 2023. The announcement was made by the Lemming’s honorary new president, Alabama Senator Tommy Tuberville.

21/04/2023

Disney CEO Bob Iger to Florida: "You've got your own Goofy -- Talk about Fantasyland! We're outta here."

DeSantis Signs Endorsement Deal With Royal Pudding
19/04/2023

DeSantis Signs Endorsement Deal With Royal Pudding

Chicago, IL; Tallahassee, Florida (eTruePolitics) – Florida governor Ron DeSantis has signed a multi-million dollar endorsement deal with Mondelez International, the holding company that produces Royal Pudding. The arrangement was announced by the governor’s press secretary who called the lucrat...

11/03/2023

A more beautiful hed and sub you'll never see. (New York Times)

Michael Cohen, Donald Trump’s ex-fixer, is set to testify before a grand jury next week, as a likely indictment of the former president looms.

Mr. Cohen is the key witness in a case built around a hush money payment to Stormy Daniels.

Heroes
09/03/2023

Heroes

Your support plays a powerful role in our lifesaving work. We are grateful for the compassion you demonstrate through your loyal commitment to our patients around the world.

In PR Counter-Offensive Tucker Carlson Promises to Donate Soup to Ukrainians
09/03/2023

In PR Counter-Offensive Tucker Carlson Promises to Donate Soup to Ukrainians

Washington (eTruePolitics) - “It’s the least I can do since I practically started the war,” explained Fox TV host Tucker Carlson in announcing today he would donate “lots” of his favorite soup to Ukrainians suffering from the Russian invasion. “I can get a good price,” joked Carlson. ....

Address


Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when eTruePolitics.com posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Videos

Shortcuts

  • Address
  • Alerts
  • Videos
  • Claim ownership or report listing
  • Want your business to be the top-listed Media Company?

Share

Our Story

FAKE NEWS ... and proud of it.

eTruePolitics.com is an online satire publication covering American politics with a laser-like focus on ridiculing buffoons. We write articles and create photo illustrations, cartoons, GIFs, videos and audios (in surround sound) with the goal of shaming fools.

Dedicated to taking scraps of truth and turning them into absurdist nonsense, eTruePolitics may be the universe’s most trusted name in politics. eTruePolitics’ motto is “Semper vigilante”(“Always vigilant”). We promise no sincerity. Ever.

Perps: