The Chris Crofton Show

17/07/2024

BBILF (Bog Bodies I'd Like to F*ck) ALSO: David Axelrod VS democracy. Greg says "make love." PLUS: Leonard Cohen and the seedy '60s, and a song of the week from

06/07/2024

Alternate titles: "Forgetting Love Canal" or "Capitalism is the Opposite of Enlightment." ALSO: Hot Plate: the scratch-off - If you get a pork chop, you get a t

27/06/2024

"Well, we've gotten to the bottom of nothing, now." - Chris ALSO: Robin Gibb gets TOO sexy. Small people with giant heads. The Bikeriders. PLUS: The Maharishi w

22/06/2024

Low-budget charcuterie. Shoddy kayaks, pants - and dogs! Was the Constitution triple-spaced? ALSO: The New Advice KIng column: "Should Progressives Vote, or Let

13/06/2024

150 Episodes!!!! Past publicity stunts that have gotten us in trouble, i.e. filling ponds with cold brew, spraying pond water onto the mayor's furniture

05/06/2024

Chris doesn't know how America's two-party system came to be. Greg gently offers a correction. ALSO: TV on the gas pump. Chris says: "I don't want to put everyo

03/06/2024

Neil Hamburger, fake eyeballs and Joe Rogan. ALSO: Bill Burr vs Bill Maher. Eddie Vedder screen printing on a private jet. PLUS: Stone Gossard's groundbreaking

03/06/2024

Chris is back from the Neil Hamburger tour!! Chris is happy! Greg is happy! Gregg Turkington hung out with Anton LaVey. That's right, you read it right. ALSO: P

03/06/2024

Greg says the show is "a finely packed and stacked operation." Chris talks about his inner life, AGAIN. Neil Young, meglomaniac. ALSO: Open mics at barber shops

04/05/2024

Youtube prarie dogs, feeling self conscious around Persian cats. Obama's Pearl Jam birthday. ALSO: Greg calls Chris "Chris Kaczynski." The sportification of Ame

24/04/2024

"Nut Pods." Coachella is a PSYOP. Camels standing up to their *waists* in water. ALSO: Rigged scales at Walmart. Greg says bananas are ripening extra fast. PLUS

16/04/2024

“The worst men have the best jobs, the best men have the worst jobs or are unemployed or locked in madhouses.”

- Charles Bukowski

09/04/2024

The nightmare in Gaza. ALSO: Powerlessness, foodies and trying to get famous. Principles before personalities. PLUS: Sidney Lumet's "Network," William Friedkin's "Sorcerer," and "Handgun," the movie. Fugazi - "Greed": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yiwXrnkgpEM Cold Brew Patreon: https://Patreon.com...

03/04/2024

Elvis, The Memphis Mafia and Colonel Tom Parker. Tom Parker's ridiculous gambling style: "He didn't understand the basics, but it was his favorite thing to do." ALSO: Mashed potatoes, gravy, sauerkraut, crisp bacon and sliced tomatoes. PLUS: "The worst news I've ever heard in my life about anything....

21/03/2024

Our mom got severely bitten by her own cat, soooo...US health care - portals, paying medical bills with JP Morgan gift cards. ALSO: Marketing myths about whiskey lead to tourists drowning in the Cumberland. Every bar should have their own ambulance. PLUS: 550 miles of formica, Can Do Cold Brew and P...

28/02/2024

Nashville's trajectory may be unstoppable, but it doesn't mean you gotta be happy about it. "Liberals" are dividing along property lines. ALSO: Brian Jones's acid-casualty beagle. PLUS: a fresh Brian-Jones-themed Can Do Cold Brew ad, and a song of the week from The Rolling Stones!!! The Rolling Ston...

28/02/2024

James Hetfield's propane habit. Chris says liberals who buy political biographies have ruined thrift stores. ALSO: Conservatives are excited about AI because they are incapable of writing good scripts. Vince Neil's horses. The new Can Do Cold Brew ad!! PLUS: RIP Dex Romweber. Song of the week from F...

17/02/2024

Rich people, ducks and berries. The garbage cans of Madison, Tennessee. ALSO: Hanging antlers on the walls of vacant office space, and calling it a boutique hotel. PLUS: Doc Noss, and the Victorio Peak treasure!! A Doc Noss-themed Can Do Cold Brew ad!! Song of the week from Kenny Rogers!! Kenny Roge...

09/02/2024

Dad fights dirty! Irish farmers in therapy!.Greg explains bitcoin! ALSO: Dream-interpreting a motorcycle. PLUS: A couple sketchy edits, and a song of the week from Weedeater! Weedeater - "God Luck and Good Speed": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fz8VhXyYCgM Cold Brew Patreon: https://Patreon.com/chr...

30/01/2024

Chris demonizes climbing walls, again. Stockton Rush's coffee cup. Greg Abbott's dishonest border war. ALSO: Throwing Elvis impersonators at a problem. The Kardashians are Wild West mummies. PLUS: Greg hopes he doesn't end up a mummy in a funhouse! Can Do Cold Brew! Song of the week from Leslie Stev...

28/01/2024

It's true. Chris broke his scapula during Nashville's "blizzard." The hospital offers a glimpse of the lost middle class. ALSO: Chris's greatest hospitalizations! Cat Scan machines are overpriced toaster ovens. PLUS: Can Do Cold Brew, corporate mergers and a song of the week from Eric Bachmann!! Eri...

21/01/2024

https://www.spreaker.com/episode/episode-132-chris-vs-himself--58326926

Chris has an existential crisis, Greg's audio is f*cked - and it's still a good show!!! ALSO: A great idea for converting an abandoned car wash into a coffee shop, Can Do Cold Brew bringing back vaudeville and the new Advice King!!! PLUS: The new Nashville Confidential, and a song of the week from A...

12/01/2024

CBS’ 'Nashville’s Big Bash' featured Lynyrd Skynyrd and Rob Schneider, for some reason

09/01/2024

Improv: the laziest way to try to get famous. Tap Dancing vs Grunge. ALSO: Private equity should be illegal. The whole financial industry should be illegal, in fact. The best Can Do Cold Brew ad ever. PLUS: A song of the week from The Strokes!! The Strokes - "OBLIVIUS": https://www.youtube.com/watch...

04/01/2024

"Iron Claw" sucked. Japanese scientists computer-modeled the call of the Moa (in like, 1980) and played it through a loudspeaker in a New Zealand swamp - to little effect. ALSO: Rogue waves, the guys who threw pies at Bill Gates and Bird scooters repurposed as police batons. PLUS: Chris previews the...

30/12/2023

Some guy put a coffee roaster in his gym. Van Gogh got tweaked on coffee. Where did Van Gogh get all the paint? ALSO: William Friedkin vs Al Pacino. Mortgage companies are where 48 Hours episodes are born. PLUS: A new Advice King!! A new Can Do Cold Brew ad!! Song(s) of the week from Jonathan Richma...

13/12/2023

Let's try less hand-wringing and more hand-holding

13/12/2023

CUBEHEADS! The rodeo clown running Argentina. Corporate media talking about the "complicated legacies" of war criminals. Knowing so much you can't function, vs knowing so little that you play frisbee. ALSO: Harvard isn't for learning, it's for networking. The world's highest bouncing superball. PLUS...

30/11/2023

Rich people’s roof decks collapsing under the weight of their helicopters. Death may be a premature conclusion. Greg is stockpiling carbon paper. ALSO: Billionaires looking at each other and seeing cartoon turkey legs. Proto-libertarians mad about newspaper stands. PLUS: Chris's NPR feature, The A...