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Life’s inconvenient truths, served on a platter of dry humor with a side of optimism’s leftovers.
(1)

15/06/2024

Precisely.
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It's not clutter... it's a three-dimensional archival system, best left to knowledgeable hands.

13/06/2024

What would you tell your younger self? Mine - It's okay to let go of that shirt. It doesn't picture well.
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Adulting: the art of looking back at your younger self and whispering, 'You had no idea.'

10/06/2024

Enjoy.
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Life's favorite hobby: proving you wrong.

03/06/2024

Betting on my back - that sucker is a regular Judas. Good morning ☕
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Ah, morning... the thrill of discovering which part of my body has randomly decided to betray me overnight.

01/06/2024

Absolutely.
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You are capable of amazing things... statistically, you will likely give up. But, yes, it's 'possible.'

30/05/2024

Winning.
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Welcome to adulthood, where your dreams come with an interest rate and your student loan payments last longer than most of your relationships.

27/05/2024

True.
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Ah, life. Where success is simply the art of disguising your failures as character-building experiences.

23/05/2024

Absolutely. Like a nice Époisses de Bourgogne.
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Why age gracefully when you can age like an old cheese... full of character and slightly offensive.

21/05/2024

Accurate. 🎯
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They call it 'midlife' because 'slightly-used life with some mileage' didn't sound as appealing.

18/05/2024

Agreed.
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Trust your instincts... because who needs rational thinking?

16/05/2024

Affirmative.
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Impulsiveness: making life exciting one regrettable decision at a time.

12/05/2024

Like fine-tuning sarcasm or binge-watching a show - fancy.
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They say life doesn't get easier, you just get stronger... in reality, you don't actually get stronger, your coping mechanisms just get fancier.

07/05/2024

Affirmative. 🎯
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Choosing the steep path builds endurance; choosing the path of least resistance builds joy.

03/05/2024

Find your inner Shakespeare in the slow lane 🖋
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Traffic: turning the most prosaic commuters into poets of profanity.

30/04/2024

Absolutely 👍
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Dress for success; it'll distract them from your glaring lack of qualifications.

30/04/2024

Should lull you right to sleep... 🧠
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Sleep well... or spend the night reliving past conversations and perfecting comebacks you'll never use. Equally refreshing.

26/04/2024

Absolutely. 🎯
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Passive-aggressiveness: when you can’t afford a therapist, but you have a Twitter account.

25/04/2024

Correct.
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It's not disorganization... it's simply redefining the chaos theory in practical terms.

24/04/2024

Good morning. ☕
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21/04/2024

Invading personal space so efficiently, you'd think they were land developers.
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Close talkers: because apparently, they need to feel your breath to hear your words.

20/04/2024

Some days it's like the mind is preparing for the witness protection program.
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It's not forgetfulness, it's practicing plausible deniability on a personal level... well played.

18/04/2024

Handed out like spray cheese on crackers at a wholesale club.
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Life: relentlessly handing out responsibilities like free samples of exhaustion.

17/04/2024

It's like Miracle-Gro, but for problems we're not even sure exist.
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Worrying: because why face your problems when you can just grow them in your imagination?

16/04/2024

The placebo effect in action. 🏆
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The best is yet to come... just kidding.

15/04/2024

True.
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You can be anything you want to be, within the limited range of options your circumstances allow.

14/04/2024

Affirmative.
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Life’s like a relentless wave that doesn’t just knock you down—it holds you under just to see how long you can hold your breath... good times.

12/04/2024

Absolutely.
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Dream big—worst case, you'll have fantastic stories for your therapist.

11/04/2024

Effective tactic. Introvert's playbook.
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Oversharing: Ensuring your presence is a contraceptive against further invitations… use liberally!

09/04/2024

Storytime: Once upon a time, I was at a get-together, and someone asked me what country I wanted to visit and I replied very confidently "Africa". As soon as the word left my mouth I melted into my chair. I was the idiot. The look on their face when I said it is forever seared in my memory.
Hasn't happened to you yet? Don't worry, you'll get your chance.
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'Be yourself’ is great advice until you realize you’re an idiot.

08/04/2024

Isn't that the truth.
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Unsolicited advice: Like a verbal colonoscopy, invasive and unwelcome... but hey, at least they 'care', right? So sweet

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