Masked Spying Press

16/11/2015

02/06/2015

Mzuzu University weeds 20 students and sends home 41 students on withdrawal and repeat courses and many others on supplementary dosage!

26/05/2015

Mzuni Students access End of Semester Exam Results which are not released

Results for last semester exams are being uploaded online and many students have accessed the results which are marred with not little anomalies.

How can students have access to results that are not released officially or through any communication?

This is unprofessional and worse for any reputable university.

Results that indicate strange courses from the ones students enrolled for.

The online system shows different average marks when you click other links (like view all link) to access the same results.

This shows the system has a lot of flaws and needs to be improved.

22/05/2015

BREAKING NEWS

The Malawi government has abolished the upkeep allowances (food and stationery stipends) to students in public universities.

The development has been revealed by the Minister of Finance - Goodall Gondwe - in the parliament today during his presentation of the 2015/16 National Budget.

The affected institutions include Mzuzu University (Mzuni), University of Malawi (Unima), Luanar and MUST.

The decision is to take its effect from the upcoming financial year (which starts in July).

14/08/2014

MESSAGE FROM THE OFFICE OF THE PRESDENT TO THE 2014’S 19TH CONGREGATION GRADUANTS – MZUZU UNIVERSITY

Sponsored:

RELATING TO SCHOOL FEES

Mzuzu University Students Representative Council (MUSREC) would like to inform all Mzuzu University Students Union (MUSU) members particularly government-sponsored graduating students whose fees recon indicates debt not to panic over the balance.

The notice follows the recent release by the University Management that all students owing the university money in form of fees or any other obligation would not be allowed to graduate unless they settle the same.

MUSREC is, to this effect, assuring all such students particularly those whose financial obligation to the university is emanating from school fees that the Government has expressed commitment to square up all the balances to those who were benefiting from its sponsorship.

MUSREC further cautions that those paying the money, as urged by the university’s communiqué, while they fall under government sponsorship is doing so at one’s will.

However, MUSREC emphasizes that those students not falling under government-sponsored category are obliged to make the settlements as required.

RELATING TO WELFARE OF GRADUANDS AND INVITED ATTENDANTS

The office of President further informs all graduating students and Parents who, prior to the graduation day, would like to be accommodated on campus to make accommodation arrangements with the office.

Those intending to seek accommodation on campus will be required to pay K1500 per bed per night. This include both single and shared beds. Thus the students or parents willing, will pay K3000 from 20th to 22nd.

On the other hand, fees at the magnificent Nora hostels will be slightly higher. Bed space will charge K2000 in shared rooms while a single room will be at k2500. This means from 20th to 22nd, K4000 and K5000 will be paid for those willing to sleep at NORA in shared and single rooms respectively.

NOTE: All beds are not furnished with beddings except for mattresses. Remember that the rooms are open both to students and guardians/parents.

09/05/2014

Mzuni runs with erratic water supply for three days now until Monday.

Unconfirmed reports indicate that the situation is due to unpaid water bills.

Is this situation necessary for the students survival?

02/05/2014

http://www.orakonews.com/mzuzu-university-suspends-75-students/

28/04/2014

Masked Spying Press (MSP) wishes to condemn in strongest terms the barbaric conduct by irresponsible individuals who took to demonstrations a few hours ago and broke the university facility.

The development leaves a lot to be desired and the community is actually surprised by this act. It is never heard of since history of the universities in Malawi.

Demonstrations at a university have been their but such a thing is entirely new. How could the whole of the so-called intellectual break glasses of the very buildings you use in the name of demonstrations?

The perpetrators of this act must be solemnly held responsible otherwise the entire student community cannot risk paying on behalf of these idiots.

19/04/2014

Rumours indicate that both stationary allowances and school fees might be settled by Tuesday. This means that by Wednesday, the students will have their stationary allowances in pockets or banks.

Lets hope this is true...

17/04/2014

NEW SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASE EPIDEMIC IN MALAWI

Via TheChief Mourner
Worse than HIV and HERPES combined, a new virulent strain of Sexually Transmitted Disease has been identified. The disease is contracted through dangerous and high-risk behavior. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lecter and pronounced "gonna re-elect her." Many victims contracted it in 2012, after supporting one of the heaviest carriers of the disease to power in April that year.

Cognitive characteristics of individuals infected include: anti-social personality disorders, delusions of grandeur with messianic overtones, extreme cognitive dissonance, inability to incorporate new information, pronounced xenophobia and paranoia, inability to accept responsibility for own actions, cowardice masked by misplaced bravado, uncontrolled facial smirking, ignorance of geography and history, tendencies towards evangelical theocracy, categorical all-or-nothing behavior.

Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed at how this destructive disease originated only a few years ago from a bush found in the Domasi and Malosa areas in Zomba.

By: TheChief Mourner

12/04/2014

“I believe hip-hop can greatly help spread gospel to the streets and colleges where lifestyle is so influenced with negative western culture. Hip-hop is western-originated and as such it plays relevance in approaching such youths to the benefit of their salvation” - Nic.

http://maskedspymzuni.wordpress.com/2014/04/12/ril-nic-bashes-obdurate-mzuni-students-with-his-maiden-mix-tape-launch/

18/03/2014

To All Men:

1. Before you start a
relationship with a lady,
you
must think carefully
about what you are about
to do. A relationship is not
something you
should rush into or handle
lightly.

2.Are you ready for a
relationship with her? Are
you
emotionally,
mentally and spiritually
mature to meet her needs?

3. Being sexually attracted
to her means absolutely
nothing. It isn’t a
sign of likeness, love or any
other thing your mind
may come up
with. It may just be your
hormones messing with
your mind. A woman is
more than her body and
her sexuality. She
has a life which
you should be able to blend
with. Can you do that?

4. This lady has a history.
Can you handle it? She has
a past. Can
you handle it? Can you
handle her mistakes,
failures
and
weaknesses? Can you
handle her dreams without
being intimidated and
becoming jealous?

5. She already had a life
before she met you. Can
you
fit into and
help improve her life?

6. Love is commitment. Are
you ready to commit your
life to helping
her grow and become all
that she can be, by God’s
grace?

7. Is she valuable enough
for you to devote a large
portion of your
life towards the
accomplishment of HER
dream? Are
you ready to
pour your resources into
making her all the Lord
plans for her to be? If you
are not ready, don’t just
bother.

8. Before you open your
mouth to say ‘I love you’,
ask yourself if this
is not just a moment of
‘emotional madness’. A lady
needs much
more than ‘I love you’. She
needs your commitment.

If you are not ready to
make that commitment
that will lead to
marriage, please
leave her alone in peace
and stop wasting her time.

11/03/2014

The lecturer Tito. Banda who belonged to the Faculty of Education is no more.

You will further be updated of any related developments as we establish.

May his soul rest in peace!

23/10/2013

SEDUCING A LADY IN A BIBLICAL MANNER (Courtesy of Mike Charles Banda aka MCB)

BOY: Do u have a boyfriend?
GIRL: No, I don't have.

BOY: Gen 2:18 "The lord God said,
it is not good for a man to be alone, I will
make a helper suitable for him.
GIRL: "But I don't love you.

BOY: 1 Jn 4:8 whoever does not
love, does not know God, because God is love.
GIRL: & how do I know you mean
those words?

BOY: Matt 12:34 for out of the abundance
of the heart the mouth speaks.
GIRL: but how can I be sure that
you're loyal & honest?

BOY : Mark 13:31 "heaven & earth will pass
away but my words will never pass away
GIRL: But why me? There are alot
of girls out there

BOY: Prov 31:29 "Many women do
noble things, but you surpass them all.
GIRL: But what is in me that you
like?

BOY: Song of solomon 4:7 "you are
altogether beautiful, my darling there is no
flaw in you"
GIRL: But I’m not that beautiful you're exaggerating

BOY: Prov 31:30 "charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman
who fears the Lord is to be praised
GIRL: What happens if I say yes.

BOY: Gen 2:24 "Therefore man shall leave his father and his mother & they shall become
one flesh
GIRL: How come you know the scriptures this much

BOY: Joshua 1;8 This book of law
shall not depart from your mouth but you
shall meditate on it day & night so that you
may be careful to do all that is written in it. For then you make your way prosperous and you
will have good success"
GIRL: Woow, I can see you really love God

BOY: Ps 34:8 oh, taste and see that lord is
good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in
him.
GIRL: mmm. Ok please give time to think
about it

BOY: Philippian 4:8 "finally brethren,
whatever is true, whatever is honourable,
whatever is just, whatever is commendable, if there is
any excellence, if there is anything worthy
of praise think about this thing
GIRL: oww I love you already
BOY: Revelation 22:21 "Amen"

21/10/2013

'BOOM' and 'DOOM'
By Manly Makonda

A good populace of this community dared look on the notice boards and eyes were unavoidably held captive on articles entitled ‘BOOM’ and ‘DOOM’. The words are a twin with completely different faces which one is likable is your business.

‘Boom!’ would never come with a softer and kinder tune; it is an explosive sound in literal sense. The outcomes of such an explosive are devoid of pain and agony. Our most revered president, the ‘divine leader’, was coloured with this as his trade mark. If what this trade mark was meant for then what happened Thursday night, the word became flesh; therefore, the Deputy Speaker had felt the effect of fate.

The same word would symbolically mean a rise or success. The community so outraged with anger could not trace any spot of it all. FOLLOW THE LINK BELOW

21/10/2013

A good populace of this community dared look on the notice boards and eyes were unavoidably held captive on articles entitled ‘BOOM’ and ‘DOOM’. The words are a twin with completely different faces which one is likable is your business.
‘Boom!’ would never come with a softer and kinder tune; it is an explosive sound in literal sense. The outcomes of such an explosive are devoid of pain and agony. Our most revered president, the ‘divine leader’, was coloured with this as his trade mark. If what this trade mark was meant for then what happened Thursday night, the word became flesh; therefore, the Deputy Speaker had felt the effect of fate.
The same word would symbolically mean a rise or success. The community so outraged with anger could not trace any spot of it all.

04/10/2013

MUSREC should instantly retract its unfounded verdict herein regarded unconstitutional and make unconditional apologies to the victims and the Student Community for injuring/assassinating the pride of the former (victims) and undermining the mandate, involvement and capacity of the latter (Student Community) failing which, the Student Community shall defend the constitution and this may turn out a boomerang action.

MUSREC, in its memo dated 3rd October, 2013, addressed to the Student Community, is quoted as having suspended some of its own members, a move that has raised wonder and concern on the part of the...

02/10/2013

Politics is like ocean waves. They appear closer to where you are standing. But the moment you try to touch them, they are meters away. If you try to chase them you get drown. Or Politics is like a coin at the bottom of an ocean it appears floating towards you.