Favvy's blog (2026)

08/06/2026

Story 4: Ghosts

On today's story review of The Thing Around Your Neck by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, we're looking at story 4 titled Ghosts.

I won't lie, this story confused me at first.

Going in, I thought I was about to read something supernatural. The title certainly didn't help sef, for a while, I kept wondering if the narrator was hallucinating or imagining things.

But the more I read, the more I realized that this isn't really a ghost story.

The story follows a retired professor reflecting on his life during and after the Biafran War. He has lost his daughter, he has lost his wife, he has watched his country, his university, and even old friendships change beyond recognition.

Then one day, he encounters Professor Ikenna, a colleague everyone had assumed died during the war, and that's where the story got interesting for me.

Because the "ghost" isn't a ghost in the horror movie sense.

It's the way the past keeps showing up when you think you've left it behind.

The more I think about it, the more the title makes sense. The story is filled with ghosts. The ghost of the war, the ghost of lost dreams, the ghost of loved ones who are gone. Even Ikenna himself feels like a ghost, a man everyone had already buried in their minds suddenly appearing years later.

What I enjoyed most was how quietly Chimamanda explored grief and memory. There were no dramatic scenes, or grand yadas, just an ordinary man carrying the weight of losses.

And maybe that's the point.

Sometimes the things that haunt us aren't spirits, sometimes they are memories, sometimes they're the lines between what could've been, sometimes they are the people we've lost.

This wasn't my favourite story in the collection so far, but it definitely left me with a lot to think about.

Alright bye, that's all for today's story review. See you tomorrow for story 5.

🖤.

06/06/2026

"Imitation"

"Oyibo people are like that, if you do something in a different way, they'll think you're abnormal as though their way was the only possible way."

Story 2: IMITATION

On today's story review of The Thing Around Your Neck by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, we're looking at story 2 titled Imitation.

I really enjoyed the dynamic of the story. It started off with the end. Classic Chimamanda. She takes us through the annoying phone call that completely shatters Nkem as she discovers that her husband, her rich Nigerian husband who lives in Nigeria and only visits her and the kids in suburban Philadelphia for two months in a year, has a mistress.

Then the story takes us to the very beginning. How she went from being an ordinary girl to a big man's wife, and how this life once felt like a dream. And how the news of his cheating didn't surprise her as much as I expected it to because she had at some point dated a married men herself.

I really liked the relationship she had with her house help, the whole "let's have a drink" dynamic. There was something refreshing about it.

Saying I loved the use of words like egalitarianism or sarcastic observations like "It's one of the things she has come to love about Americans, the abundance of unreasonable hope" is an understatement.

What I completely missed until I was done reading was the meaning of the title itself.

Nkem's house was filled with expensive imitation artworks. Beautiful copies of the original. And somehow, that was Nkem's life too.

From the outside, she had everything. The rich husband, the big house, the children, the American dream. But the more we get to know her, the more you realize she was mostly existing in a life someone else had built for her. Waiting for Obiora's calls, waiting for his visits, living where he wanted, doing what he wanted. The paintings weren't the only imitations in that house.

This was a beautiful read and, like Chimamanda, we're left hanging. Nkem doesn't explode when Obiora visits for the summer or even ask him about the mistress. Instead she's like, "We'll have to find a school in Lagos for the kids. We're moving back to Nigeria."

And there and then, the story ends.

Here I am wondering what happens next. Would Obiora agree to the relocation knowing fully well he has a mistress in Lagos? Would she fit into Nigeria once again? And was moving back to Nigeria her way of finally choosing an original life instead of an imitation?

Alright bye... See you tomorrow for story 3

🖤.

05/06/2026

You guyssssssss,

I'm doing a daily review of each of the stories in the book The Thing Around Your Neck by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.

This book is a collection of 12 short stories, much like the moonlight folktales we read in primary school. Each story, no matter how short, is deeply emotional and easily relatable.

Here's what I have to say about Story 1.

Story 1: Cell One

I loved how descriptive it was. It felt like I could feel the underlying emotions. The story centres around a lecturer's family in Nsukka, particularly their son, Nnamabia, who was the favourite child. He was charming, handsome, popular, and the kind of kid who got away with a lot of things.

He wasn't a cultist, but he was arrested alongside some of his cultist friends when they were drinking past curfew, and that's how he ended up in a cell.

At first, he didn't seem shaken by the conditions. He played smart, became a favourite among the inmates, and generally appeared to be doing okay. Until a sick, old, fragile-looking man was brought into his cell for a crime his son had committed.

What stood out to me was how deeply concerned he became about the man. For the first time ever, he seemed sober and reflective, and all he could talk about was the suffering of that poor, innocent old man.

Because really, the measure of our humanity is how empathetic we are to the suffering of others, and this was his transformative experience in prison.

It was a short, simple tale with a lot of psychological depth that you might not immediately pick up on. And, in classic Chimamanda style, we're left hanging, wondering what happens next.

Does this experience change him for good, or does he return home and go back to his former extravagant lifestyle? How shaken is he? What becomes of him?

Alright, that's all for today.

Tomorrow, I'll share my review of the next story.

🖤.

03/06/2026

Consistency Helps Itself

I've said this before, and it's really something I think works. Not just for me, but I've seen it play out multiple times.

One of the reasons we're able to keep streaks is because consistency helps itself. If I've had a 30 day streak with my best friend, I wouldn't want to end it. So even if I don't feel like showing up one day, the thought that it all disappears if I don't keep it up is enough to make me continue. You get?

My roommate was showing me a 200 day streak she has with a friend of hers, and they even have a child together called "Meli." It was so cute and cool. She would seriously not go to bed without sending her streak partner a video because the fact that she has been consistent so far is enough to compel her to keep going, even on days she doesn't feel like it.

That's exactly how it was for me two days ago.

I had one of the most hectic days ever. I was exhausted and all I wanted to do was sleep. But I hadn't written my daily content. My brain was foggy and I was in no state of mind to write.

Did I still write? Absolutely.

Because not writing would mean killing a streak that has taken over two years of effort, discipline, and time to build. And nothing is more disappointing than allowing a single day of weakness to destroy something you've spent years building.

Dearest reader, knowing that consistency helps itself, what do you do with this information?

Simple.

If there's something you're working on, something you want to be consistent with, create a streak for it. Make yourself visibly accountable.

For me, I do this very simple thing. I like programming my environment. I place before my eyes the things I want to remember. So I draw a weekly calendar on paper, write the dates, and every day I achieve the goal attached to that streak, I tick it off.

And honestly, it feels really good.

Looking at the wall and seeing those ticks reminds me that I've been showing up. Sometimes, that's all I need on a day when I don't feel motivated to still show up for myself.

Because the truth is, you can't always ride on willpower. There's only so far willpower or excitement can take you. You need a system that keeps you grounded.

And a streak does exactly that with very little effort.

🖤.

02/06/2026

A RANT: WHAT DO YOU DO?

Today, we are properly ranting. Yes, because I've been angry about something since 8am, and the Bible says you shouldn't let the sun go down on your anger. Hence, I'll let it go in this piece.

****

I'm not an angry person. In fact, I'm the kind of person you meet and, on the very first day, we'll relate so well you'd think we've known each other forever. However, you don't want to get on my bad side.

My thing is, and I think this should be basic human decency: I won't treat you in a way I don't want you to treat me. I won't speak to you in a manner I can't stand. It's that simple.

So this morning, somebody I don't even know replied rudely to a message and suggestion I dropped in our Chemistry practical group chat. I was so pi**ed because, from where to where? If the response had anything to do with what I said, I would understand. But no. It was completely vague, out of context, and, again, rude.

My first thought was, is this person generally okay? Maybe they had a high fever. Maybe they dropped off their courtesy and human decency somewhere and forgot to pick them up. Or maybe, just maybe, they woke up on the wrong side of the bed, which somehow affected their ability to respond like a human being with functioning thinking faculties. Just maybe.

Now, being Favour Okwanyionu, I wasn't going to let it slide easy, because I would never speak or respond to anybody like that, therefore I won't even take it. So I replied to the person privately because it had to be a mistake, you get? But then again, this person was completely unapologetic about the message.

For me, it's the audacity to talk nonsense and still stand ten toes down in the nonsense.

And maybe I'm a little more pained because it was a girl. You'd think there would be some level of alliance or solidarity or something. But then again, people are simply themselves.

Dearest reader, why am I sharing this story or this rant?

Because at least once, or probably more than once, you've experienced someone moving mad around you. Someone has said something that made your blood boil, and yet you still let it slide because you knew it wouldn't change anything.

This experience made me realise that courtesy is a luxury in this society. For real, not everyone is sensible enough to understand how to navigate relationships and interactions with people.

Alright, that felt good. Like I poured all of that onto these pages.

What do you do when you're so upset but want to let it slide?

We already know Favour Okwanyionu writes a rant.

But you, what do you do?

🖤.

01/06/2026

PROPERLY TIRED.

I've had one of the most hectic days ever and as I think back to how it went, I'm impressed. I was literally doing so much at the same time and I couldn't understand how I do it, but I just do.

There are days where you literally outdo yourself and the reward is being properly tired. Oh, how nice it is to be tired from doing what we once could only imagine, hope for, or pray about.

Sometimes we get so caught up in the exhaustion that we forget to acknowledge the growth. We forget that there was a version of us that wished for opportunities, responsibilities and experiences that now make up our everyday lives.

Today was stressful. It was demanding, it stretched me in ways I didn't expect, but it also reminded me that I am capable of more than I often give myself credit for.

So dearest reader, I am allowing myself to be tired. Not frustrated or defeated. Just tired. The kind of tired that comes from showing up, giving your best and getting things done.

And for that, I am grateful.

🖤.

30/05/2026

Arsenal lost.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm in pain.

But first, from where to where? Since when did Favour Okwanyionu start liking football? And not just liking it, but passionately supporting a club?

Alright,,, let's go back to the beginning.

I didn't care about football. Not because there was anything remotely wrong with the sport, but because it simply wasn't interesting enough for me. I would often ask, "Why are 22 grown adults running around after one ball?" It seemed laughable.

However, I have this friend who talks about football all the time on his status. Every major match, every football season, I wouldn't have peace. His status would be packed full of memes, updates, predictions, and banter.

Over time, after constantly seeing his posts, I got used to them. I might not have watched a single match, but I usually knew what was happening because of his status updates and his very cruel memes.

Now, sometime in early May, I came across a particular video on his status. It was absolutely hilarious. It was an Arsenal fan being overly dramatic about a match scheduled for May 30.

In the video, the guy was checking his blood pressure, avoiding unnecessary arguments, staying away from confrontations, and whenever anyone insulted him, he'd simply say, "Make 30th of May come first."

It was both hilarious and strange.

So I slid into my friend's DM to ask what exactly was happening on May 30. He told me it was the Champions League final and gave me the background story of why it was such a big deal for Arsenal fans.

Then he said something that stayed with me.

He said Arsenal had never won the Champions League, and the closest they had ever come to winning it was in 2006.

Dearest reader, guess who was born in 2006?

Like,,, burst my brain. I couldn't believe it.

That's when I started researching the club to confirm his statement. Somewhere between the articles, the videos, the history, and the heartbreak, I fell in love with the club. I fell in love with the resilience, I fell in love with the story. And like a storyteller I deeply admire would say, Arsenal is a great story.

Because it is.

This is a club that earned the nickname "The Invincibles" after going through an entire 38 game league season unbeaten, only to spend the next 22 years waiting to win the Premier League again.

How do you not get emotionally attached to a story like that?

So after discovering this emotional rollercoaster of a football club, and realizing that 2006, the year I was born, was also the last time they came close to winning the Champions League, I became hooked.

Because what do I love almost as much as a good story?

A good emotional story.

I even became the one reminding my football status guy about May 30. That's how invested I was. I was eagerly counting down to it.

You know those stories with happily ever afters? The ones where the hero suffers, struggles, survives the unimaginable, and eventually wins?

Yes. That's what I was expecting.
In fact, I was convinced this season would be it.

Now imagine my heartbreak when the game ended in a penalty shootout. Just imagine.

It feels like that scene in The Fault in Our Stars where Augustus Waters discovers his cancer has returned and says, "I lit up like a Christmas tree."

Or that scene in How to Get Away with Murder when Wes Gibbins dies in that burning house.

That's exactly how heartbreaking it feels. Because you'd think that after everything they've been through, this would finally be their moment.

But then there's reality, there's the unpredictability of life. Let's be honest, there's nothing quite as painful as an almost. Because it feels so close, so within arm's reach, you can smell the victory, you can imagine how it would feel sitting on your skin, you can already taste it on the tip of your tongue.

And then, just then, it slips away and here I am. Furious. Devastated. Hurt.

And hell no, I'm not about to give some deep insight into why we lost or offer a comforting perspective on the pain.

For the record, "you people tried na" does not make it any better.

Abeg, carry your sympathy far from me😑

Okay bye.

🖤.

28/05/2026

We oftentimes forget to do the simple thing of standing up for ourselves.

I know you're good at defending others. I know you'll go to war for the people you love, but would you go to war for you? Would you fight for yourself the way you fight for others?

I read somewhere and I'll quote, “the love you so desperately crave, why don't you give it to yourself?” Allow me paraphrase; the love you so freely give others, would it kill you to give some to yourself too?

Dearest reader, there was this popular meme I saw recently, it read, “Since consideration is the highest form of love, how come you don't consider yourself?”

And truly, how come?

How come you're patient with everyone else but harsh on yourself? How come you forgive others for making mistakes but punish yourself for every little thing? How come you constantly pour into people and still leave yourself empty?

You deserve softness too.
You deserve grace too.
You deserve the same kindness you hand out so freely to the world.

Please, stand up for yourself too.
Choose yourself too.
Love yourself too.

You are someone worth fighting for.

🖤.

27/05/2026

How do you keep on keeping on?

A friend of mine reached out to me yesterday, commending how well I’m holding up given that it’s been a week since I lost my phone and I’ve still been showing up and carrying on like nothing happened.

Omor, I didn’t even know what to say because really, how was I holding up? I was just going through each day and deciding to be happy. I remember spending a whole day crying and that didn’t bring back my phone. Me that does not like stress, anything that’s way out of my control, I won’t even allow it stress me.

Being sad wasn’t going to fix it, so I chose not to drown in it. I chose to show up for me and still do what I normally do because I have a system that supports that.

I hold myself to a certain standard, a certain routine and like the words from a poem I like say, “even if the light’s turned off and my fears are not gone, I’ll give it my best shot because the show must go on.”

Dearest reader, I read somewhere that the world doesn’t stop for broken people, so as you’re crying, just be moving small small too. Like they say, “dey cry dey go front.”

How do you keep on keeping on?

For me, I don’t really have another choice. I have to, because the journey is far and things can always be worse. But you, how do you do it?

Ask yourself that.

🖤.

26/05/2026

I watched a really emotional video today and it left me feeling so many things at once. I don't even know how to explain it properly.

It was a TikTok reel of a lady talking about what could genuinely count as one of the worst days of someone's life. She had food poisoning while on a date with the actual love of her life. Like dream man kind of love. And this man cleaned up after her and still married her.

At some point she said, "this man cleaned up my diarrhea," and as unreal as it sounded, it was so emotional to me.

Because in a generation where people are so quick to write others off, where everyone is expected to always look perfect and have it together, this man stayed.

The craziest part is that it was a Netflix and chill type of date in her house. Oga could have quietly left. No explanations. No judgement from anyone. But he stayed, looked beyond the ugliness of the moment, and took care of her.

I watched that video over and over again trying not to cry, and it made me ask myself a very honest question: if the tables were turned, would I do the same for someone else?

I remember Chimamanda saying in one of her books, I think Dear Ijeawele, that before you go above and beyond for someone, ask yourself if they would do the same for you if the tables were turned. Ever since I read that, I've liked imagining whether I can give back the same kind of love and grace that I receive.

A lot of people will watch that video and say, "awww, such a sweet guy," but if the roles were reversed, they would never stay through something that unpleasant.

Dearest reader, may we never experience tragedies so humiliating, and may we meet people who are compassionate enough to care for us even in our ugliest moments.

But more importantly, may we become those kind of people too.

The kind who hold the shattered gently.
The kind who do not stop loving people because they are broken.
The kind who understand that some situations are simply beyond human control.

Because maybe that is one of the purest forms of being human.

🖤.

Favvy's blog

08/06/2026

06/06/2026

05/06/2026

03/06/2026

02/06/2026

01/06/2026

30/05/2026

28/05/2026

27/05/2026

26/05/2026

Address

Website

Alerts

Shortcuts

Share