The most frustrating thing about life as an ADHD person is being dismissed and invalidated. When we say we âcanâtâ do something, we mean it literally! Weâre not lazy, weâre not unmotivated; we have an actual neurological difference in our brain that impacts our executive function. Saying âjust do itâ is no more helpful than screaming at a paraplegic to get up and walk and then showing them how easy it is for you. Weâre painfully aware that many of the things we struggle with are easy for other people. #hiddendisability #executivedysfunction #ActuallyAutistic #audhd #dontbelikedave #adhd #neurodivergent #adhdawareness #ableism
Almost every ADHD adult I know has been a victim of the "ADHD tax." Often, we blame ourselves and engage in self-deprecation because we believe we should have filled out the form earlier or remembered to do it. The reality is, if we were personally to blame, this wouldn't be a common trap that virtually every ADHDer Iâve ever met falls intoânot occasionally, but regularly! This is about existing in a society that isnât designed around our needs; it's about being set up for failure from the outset.For example, I just received a ÂŁ500 late fee on a ÂŁ5000 tax that I was never due to pay in the first place. Why? Because I didnât complete a complex form on time. I asked for help, but the person on the phone explained that it was a relatively simple form and all I had to do was follow the steps. Simple for them, perhapsânot for me.In the UK, accessibility issues like this are covered under the Equality Act 2010. However, proving that this was an accessibility issue is easier said than done. Often, people just donât understand. They tell us that weâre lazy or making excuses. Telling someone with ADHD to "just do" a task they're stuck in paralysis over is like asking a paraplegic to just get up and walk and then calling them lazy when they donât comply. Weâre not lazy; we have an actual disability that makes tasks like this difficult for us. Society often doesnât understand this, and having to repeatedly explain ourselves is exhausting. #adhd #adhdawareness #adhdsupport #ADHDLife #adhdtax #ActuallyAutistic #audhd #autistic #hiddendisability
I canât speak for other neurodivergent people, but for me personally, one of the biggest drains on my energy is having to continually explain myself, being judged by neurotypical standards, and having facets of my disability treated as though they are either a character flaw or laziness. If a neurodivergent person tells you that they âcanât do something,â please donât tell them why itâs easy for you; they already know. Expecting them to accomplish something because itâs easy for you is no different than telling a paraplegic to âstop being lazy and just walk.â We know you canât see our disability. We get that itâs hard to understand something you havenât experienced, but weâre not asking you to! All we ask is that you accept what weâre telling you and refrain from judgment. I, for one, am done apologizing for my neurology! #adhdlife #ActuallyAutistic #adhd #neurodivergent #ADHDawareness #audhd #hiddendisability
Many neurodivergent people find it easier to make and maintain neurodivergent friendships, we tend to attract each other, and would likely be seen moving in packs if we weren't so often retreating from the outside world. Masking is bad for us yet we do it anyway because itâs often safer than being our true selves. Being misunderstood is stressful, yet masking can often lead to burnout. This means we sometimes need to withdraw to protect ourselves. Fear of being judged and shamed makes it so much harder to emerge from our reclusive state; I feel very fortunate to have friends who can empathise without judgment (the double empathy problem). #autismacceptance #ADHDAwareness #AuDHD #ActuallyAutistic #neurodivergent #neurodiversity
Woman have spoken and they choose the bear; as men we need to stop being offended by this, itâs not open for us to debate. #actuallyautistic #adhdawareness. #adhd #audhd #autistic #feminist #neurodiversity
NEVER get between an ADHDer and their coffee; they will come for you. #neurodivergent #adhdawareness #adhd #actuallyautistic #audhd #relatable #caffeine #coffeetime
Hey folks, quick reminder to stay hydrated! I've been feeling awful with a headache for the past several hours, and it just hit me that I haven't had anything to drink all day. It's kind of ridiculous how this surprises me every day, but like many of my neurokin, I struggle to pick up on my body's signals. Aside from coffee and energy drinks, I always forget to hydrate properly. Learn from my mistake and make sure to drink some water today! #adhdawareness #adhd #audhd #ActuallyAutistic #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #interoception #relatable
I've recently received numerous comments and messages from individuals seeking advice on neurodivergent relationships. Some inquiries come from neurotypical individuals looking to understand their ADHD partner, while others originate from couples where both individuals are neurodivergent.Before delving further, I want to emphasize that I am by no means a relationship expertâmy wife can certainly attest to that fact. That being said, I've been married for nearly 20 years (this July). My wife is autistic, and Iâm AuDHD, which means I'm both autistic and ADHD. Throughout our marriage, we've encountered our fair share of disagreements, most of which stem from differences in communication styles, leading to misunderstandings.I plan to create several reels sharing my personal experience with neurodivergent relationships. However, it's important to note that these are solely based on my personal journey, nothing more. Hopefully, some of you will find them helpful. There's plenty to discuss, so consider this Part 1.#ActuallyAutistic #adhdawareness #audhd #executivedysfunction #hiddendisability #neurodivergentrelationship #relationships
ADHD paralysis can be debilitating (Part 2). This is a follow-up to the last video. I was overwhelmed by the huge number of people who commented, describing their own experiences and expressing how much they related to what I was describing. I was also stunned by the enormous number of comments and even PMs from people calling me lazy (among other things). Thereâs not much I can do about people who choose to be willfully ignorant, but for those who just didnât understand, I wanted to elaborate a little. For those of you who have been affected by this, please remember you arenât lazy, and we are not merely procrastinating; itâs not your fault. If youâre neurotypical and it doesnât make sense to you, thatâs OK; just accept what weâre telling you and donât dismiss or undermine us. I plan to follow up with a 3rd video on underlying causes and a 4th for friends, family, and colleagues on how they can be supportive. #ActuallyAutistic #adhdawareness #audhd #executivedysfunction #adhdparalysis #hiddendisability
What is it like living in an ADHD brain? Well, Iâve only lived with my own, so Iâll try not to speak for everyone (although I'm certain many others with ADHD can relate). Simply put, it's noisy and hectic, with an internal monologue of stray thoughts colliding and crashing through a dysfunctional brain. Beneath the chaos, there are feelings of guilt, shame, and the ever-present echo of voices from my formative years, saying, "you're not good enough," "you're a failure," "you are so stupid!". #adhdawareness #adhdlife #adhdsupport #adhd #hiddendisability #ActuallyAutistic #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #adhdsim #executivedysfunction
Archaic and ableist practices persist in classroom environments, causing trauma to neurodivergent youth. We must strive for improvement. This message is not directed at the exemplary teachers; rather, it addresses educators who profess to embrace neurodivergent-affirming approaches in theory but fail to implement them in practice. These are the teachers who instruct students to "remove your headphones while I speak," despite understanding that some students rely on them for focus. They acknowledge that eye contact isn't necessary for engagement yet insist, "please look up while Iâm speaking." Similarly, they may ask neurodivergent students to "stop taking notes while Iâm speaking," disregarding the fact that for some, note-taking is integral to their executive function. True support for neurodivergent students requires consistent action, not just theoretical endorsement. #AutismAcceptance #audhd #adhdawareness #actuallyautistic #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #teachers #educators #InclusiveClassroom
A couple of months ago, I shared a reel that sparked some backlash. In it, I mentioned that "ADHD and Autism are not superpowers" and elaborated on why labeling them as such can be detrimental. I want to emphasize that I'm not dictating how individuals should perceive themselves; personally, I embrace my neurodivergence with positivity. However, it's essential to recognize that "disability" is not a dirty word. #adhdawareness #autismawareness #neurodivergent #hiddendisability #ableism #actuallyautistic #adhd #audhd
Many of us are familiar with the idea of Body Doubling and how useful it can be for getting started on high-anxiety or low-dopamine tasks, but itâs not just about productivity; it can also help us relax. How many of us have planned a day to rest and ended up spending the whole day pacing? Having a friend or family member join us in a leisure activity can help us fully engage in something that we find restorative and restful. #adhdawareness #adhd #aoudad #ActuallyAutistic #autismawareness #neurodivergent #bodydoubling #adhdparalysis
As a quick reminder to my neurodivergent peers, it's okay for you to say "NO." Many neurodivergent people, myself included, struggle with setting boundaries and often compromise our own mental and physical health to keep others happy. While I've always found setting boundaries challenging, sometimes it's essential to prioritize our well-being. #adhdawareness #adhdsupport #AuDHD #neurodivergent #ActuallyAutistic #autismacceptance #mentalhealthawareness #reels
Spoon Theory is a useful concept for explaining mental or physical energy and how, through disability, that energy can become limited. With ADHD, there is a secondary impact created by executive dysfunction and impulsivity, causing us to frequently make wasteful choices in how we utilize that energy. #autismacceptance #ADHDAwareness #AuDHD #ActuallyAutistic #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #SpoonTheory
For me, AuDHD doesnât just equal the sum of autism + ADHD. It feels more like having two distinct aspects of your personality that both compete for dominance and act entirely in their own self-interest. Usually, ADHD takes precedence, often to the detriment of my autistic self, who is left picking up the pieces. #ADHDAwareness #AuDHD #ActuallyAutistic #neurodivergent #neurodiversity
Society often values concepts such as a relentless work ethic and productivity highly. However, these ideals can become counterproductive when they lead to burnout. Sometimes, making the choice to quit and prioritize self-care is essential for moving forward positively. #ActuallyAutistic #adhdawareness #audhd #neurodivergent #burnout #neurodivergent #relatablepost
The past week has been overwhelming with numerous people and seemingly immovable "things." At times, I need to remind myself that it's not just acceptable but essential to make myself unavailable to others in order to protect myself. It's okay to switch off; prioritizing your well-being over society's expectations and demands is perfectly acceptable. #adhdawareness #ActuallyAutistic #audhd #neurodivergent #ADHD #autisticburnout
Losing my class schedule was a frequent (daily) event for me, often leading to wandering the halls of my high school, appearing lost and confused. To make matters worse, I would frequently find myself seated in a class already in session, only to realize I didn't recognize any of the students. I can still feel the shame and embarrassment. #adhdawareness #adhdlife #ActuallyAutistic #neurodivergent #audhd #adhdbrain #autistic
