Love, Illusions and Longing

07/10/2022

I felt devastated when my website got trashed during the pandemic. But it is a real problem or a Third World Problem?

Dorothy Heller, writer, blogger. Love, Illusions and Longing.

19/02/2022

Deeply moving article. The anchor gave me chills:

https://www.nationalgeographic.com/history/article/a-divers-hunt-for-lost-slave-ships-led-to-an-incredible-journey

Explorer Tara Roberts took up diving to learn about the human side of a tragic era. She wound up connecting with her family’s inspiring past.

01/10/2021

This is an incredible demonstration of working mother multitasking and grace under pressure-a rabbi handling her child's tantrum while she is presiding over High Holy Day services over Zoom. I'm awestruck; I thought meltdowns in the supermarket were hard to handle!

https://www.kveller.com/watch-this-rabbi-lead-high-holiday-services-while-managing-a-toddler-tantrum/

Earlier this month, Rabbi Aimee Gerace, the education director at the Pasadena Jewish Temple and Center and a mother of two, was interrupted by her toddler during a work meeting on Zoom. That’s practically a daily occurrence for many of us — thanks Covid-19! — and, admittedly, for Gerace, too....

28/09/2021

Last night's post was about the ravages of aging. This is what 100 look likes-if you're Betty Reid Soskin. Soskin turned 100 on September 22,. She is the oldest active park ranger in America--she became a park ranger at 85--serving at the Rosie the RIveter/World War II Homefront park in Richmond, CA. One of her motives for becoming a park ranger is to honor the thousands of black and Latina Rosie the Riveters who served the war effort. This is the way to grow old!

https://www.nytimes.com/2021/09/20/us/betty-reid-soskin-100.html

Betty Reid Soskin has fought to ensure that American history includes the stories that get overlooked. As she turns 100, few stories have been more remarkable than hers.

27/09/2021

I finally saw ELIZABETH IS MISSING, an acclaimed PBS Masterpiece mystery about dementia. Glenda Jackson, the award-winning 85-year-old actor who left the theater to serve in Britain's House of Commons for two decades, plays Maud, the determined but addled heroine. Elderly characters are usually portrayed either as cute wrinklies or freak show horrors. Although Maud is brave and feisty in her way, the fate of both the heroine and her missing friend is enough to make any senior viewer seriously consider su***de well before the next pledge drive. Or give any middle-aged son or daughter nightmares about what to do with the parents. I certainly admire Jackson's acting chops, but I came away from my television wanting to color my hair, run marathons, and get plastic surgery. Maybe it's time for more 85-year-olds to write and produce these dramas as well as act in them.

26/08/2021

Just finished brilliant and insightful memoir by Anna Wiener, a liberal arts outsider in the technology industry of Silicon Valley: UNCANNY VALLEY." (Uncanny valley, btw, is "a term used to describe the relationship between the human-like appearance of a robotic object and the emotional response it evokes)." She nails startup company culture, Silicon Valley illusions and delusions, its effect on society. This is also a Cinderella story-- she ventures forth on her journey, clueless, from a badly paid beginner's job in Manhattan's sclerotic publishing industry. She returns as a NY Times bestseller, contributor for the New Yorker--the dream of every publishing intern and creative writing grad--with the solid, supportive, and smart partner she discovers in the technological wilderness. Very definitely a Silicon Valley success story, but this time it's the lover of literature that triumphs, not the geek.

21/06/2020

I never binge-watch, but I am binge-watching AMERICA FOR ME, a documentary about Oak Park High School and the racial disparities in a community that considers itself to be liberal. The kids are moving, touching, sincere, brilliant, maddening, and you can't help worrying about them and cheering for them. AMERICA FOR ME amply demonstrates how good educators are really the most important people in the world. The only strange thing is that each episode begins with a stern warning "for mature audiences only-violence, etc." There are no similar warnings before zillions of violent, exploitative programs and films. Any kid over 12 can and should watch this and any parent who is shocked has been in a medically induced coma for the last two decades. Available on Hulu until Tuesday and also available on Amazon Prime.

21/06/2020

My tribute to the aforementioned Mae West:

http://www.dorothyheller.com/my-cougar-moment-older-women-younger-men-mae-west-and-the-mature-single/

21/06/2020

Streaming on PBS, a documentary about one of my heroes: MAE WEST--DIRTY BLONDE. She was a woman pioneer, turned plays about s*x into comedy and cash, and at one point was the highest-grossing actress in Hollywood. Although she lived long enough to become a caricature of herself, she had a handsome bodybuilder years younger who was devoted to her. Not such a bad way to grow old.

14/06/2020

Rhiannon Giddens at SF Jazz Fridays@5. Trained as an opera singer, she fell in love with the banjo and is now a brilliant interpreter of Americana/Roots/Bluegrass, as also seen on Ken Burn's "Country Music" series. She describes herself as "that girl at the party"-the one who brings up history, slavery, racism in music, the black origins of the bano--both the terrible and wonderful of the American story.. She does so with great erudition and wit-check her out.

https://www.npr.org/2018/11/02/662261895/rhiannon-giddens-is-the-21st-centurys-revelator

Giddens' influence is not contained by her many accolades but by her drive to unearth forgotten stories, developing the ethos of a new reconstruction based in truth-telling.

14/06/2020

Detailed discussion of an iconic photograph by Robert Frank. Sadly, still relevant:

https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2020/06/12/arts/design/robert-frank-americans.html?campaign_id=58&emc=edit_ck_20200614&instance_id=19358&nl=cooking®i_id=67625617&segment_id=30889&te=1&user_id=3b69e16e40ee0a66b300bcf0214a1351

How, in a single photograph, Robert Frank captured the ongoing story of a divided nation.

19/05/2020

Being single during a pandemic, cryonics, and the loneliest man in the world:
http://www.dorothyheller.com/boomers-on-ice-the-mature-single-and-cryogenics/

19/05/2020

Boomers, cryonics, and the loneliest man in the world:

http://www.dorothyheller.com/boomers-on-ice-the-mature-single-and-cryogenics/

18/05/2020

How to bring peace in the Middle East:

https://www.nytimes.com/video/opinion/100000004431936/the-shampoo-summit.html?campaign_id=41&emc=edit_od_20200516&instance_id=18544&nl=op-docs®i_id=67625617&segment_id=28102&te=1&user_id=3b69e16e40ee0a66b300bcf0214a1351

In a hair salon in Israel, Arab and Jewish women find common ground… in a sink.

18/05/2020

SF Jazz' Fridays at 5 program introduced me to an eclectic, Grammy award-winning Colombian gypsy jazz group: Monsieur Perine. They're South American, not French, and the name came from a joke based on the word "perineum," not commonly used in conversation. They are all unique musicians who write their own songs-colorful and original:

10/05/2020

The story of the childless woman who invented Mothers Day:

http://www.dorothyheller.com/the-mature-single-and-mothers-day-angst-ambivalence-and-brunch/

09/05/2020

A very cogent point for Mother Day's--it's time to pay the humans who raise the human race:

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/05/08/opinion/sunday/women-housework-coronavirus-mothers-day.html?referringSource=articleShare

One lesson from the pandemic: Child care is work. And it should be compensated.

02/05/2020

Completely escapist--even dated? Sounds just perfect! PRESENT LAUGHTER on PBS, with a Tony Award-winning comic performance by the brilliant actor Kevin Kline. A 1942 play the late British playwright/satirist Noel Coward:

https://www.pbs.org/wnet/gperf/noel-cowards-present-laughter-full-episode/7618/

Kevin Kline gives a Tony Award®-winning performance in Noël Coward’s Present Laughter.

02/05/2020

CRIP CAMP, available on Netflix, is a moving, illuminating, often funny documentary about a summer camp for disabled kids and teenagers that gave birth to a "disability revolution" that led to the American Disabilities Act. The kids who became activists show rare courage, determination, and grit as they struggle to make lives for themselves in a society that preferred to keep them hidden:

02/05/2020

ABBY GOLDFARB has actually been in FIDDLER ON THE ROOF, both in English and Yiddish. She's using her Broadway talents while in isolation to write satires on the Corona Virus. Here she is in a brilliant Covid-19 version of "Matchmaker, Matchmaker:"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SrxJkVebwDI

"Matchmaker" (Fiddler On The Roof) parody in the time of Coronavirus Follow on Instagram for more content! 🎹 Accompaniment track: PianoTrax LYR...

02/05/2020

NISSIM BLACK doesn't present himself like you would expect a Rapper to look--or an Orthodox Jew. He's both--and describes himself as "Hitler's Worst Nightmare." Nissim is the son and grandson of jazz and hip hop musicians whose lives were derailed by drugs. His search for God found Orthodox Judaism in a Sephardic Seattle synagogue. Now living in Israel and recording with major Israeli musicians such as Gad Elbaz, his work ranges from tender to whip smart satirical to deeply spiritual. Here's a song he wrote on the anniversary of his mother's death:

https://soundcloud.com/nissim-music/both-of-us

Written By: Nissim Black Additional Vocals By: Balewa Muhammad Produced By: Yosef "One20Muzik" Brown Additional Keys By: Yisroel Laub Mixed By: Jonathan Friedlander for Quality Sound Studios, Jerusal

14/04/2020

Now is the time for books-and to support our local businesses. Leighs Books and Bookasaurus on Murphy street in Sunnyvale is normally a wonderful resource for reading and browsing for both adults and kids; consulting real live expert human beings; and exceptional children's books and gifts. You can order online and they will also do contactless delivery or store pickup:

http://www.leighsbooks.com/

14/04/2020

Not everybody gets to shelter in place:

http://www.dorothyheller.com/boomer-in-the-corona-virus-crossfire-behind-the-front-lines/

I'm a boomer working just behind the Corona Virus Front Line. My coworkers and I are almost at the bottom of the medical food chain, but still classified as essential designated disaster workers. We're all within nodding distance of Covid 19.

13/04/2020

You don't have to be Jewish to love the Saturday Night Seder fundraiser for the CDC CoronaVirus Relief Fund, full of both Jewish and non-Jewish celebrities, rabbis, assorted other humans--Bette Midler playing Elijah. Cythia Erivo and Shoshana Bean singing "There Will Be Miracles." Ben Platt singing "Over the Rainbow," Billy Porter and"Go Down Moses," Tan France in "Q***r Eye for the Sinai." And more. Wonderful. Enjoy and contribute!

https://www.saturdaynightseder.com/

  DONATE NOW Total Raised: $2.35 Million…and we are still going!There’s still plenty of time to donate! Click the button above to contribute. Thank you to everyone who has contributed, from the bottom of our hearts.Total includes donations from viewers of Saturday Night Seder made on saturdayn...

08/04/2020

A safe and healthy Passover to all who celebrate it and all who don't. A reflection from when holiday preparations and marital status were our only worries:

http://www.dorothyheller.com/single-at-the-seder-why-is-this-night-different/

As a mature single, Passover has a special edge for me. When I had a home and partner, I was the host. Now, I am a mature single, divorced, and a renter.

08/04/2020

Covid 19 robs us of a genius poet/singer songwriter:

https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-country/john-prine-obit-253684/

Grammy-winning singer who combined literary genius with a common touch succumbs to coronavirus complications

07/04/2020

A brief message from the Love Illusions and Longing blog:

http://www.dorothyheller.com/boomer-pandemic-romance-stay-tuned-love-illusions-and-longing/

Boomer Pandemic Romance-Stay Tuned Love Illusions and Longing  Boomer Pandemic Romance-Stay Tuned Love Illusions and Longing  Dorothy Heller, L.I.L. - Love, Illusions, and Longing, Mature Singles-Single & Over 45  Add comments Apr 072020   Well, hello again. Welcome to blogging about the longing...

06/04/2020

Two remarkable women who put our current predicament in perspective:

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/03/28/nyregion/naomi-replansky-eva-kollisch-coronavirus.html

Two extraordinary women — one 101, the other 95 — lived through the worst of the 20th century. They have some advice for you.

06/04/2020

"I'LL BE ME: Glenn Campbell," on Amazon Prime and YouTube. You don't have to like country music to see how Alzheimers Disease ravages a master entertainer and his struggling family. Campbell began a farewell tour after being diagnosed with Alzheimers. Campbell's musical knowledge is so profound that he is able to play astonishing guitar solos when no longer able to find the restroom, and sing his final recording perfectly when he can no longer understand the words. It is deeply moving to see Campbell share his music as everything else falls apart.

06/04/2020

Thank you to Tami Mulcahy of South Bay House Concerts for hosting virtual house concert with Nashville artist Kyshona. Kyshona was going to swing by the West Coast on her way to Australia to promote her new release: LISTEN, praised by Billboard and Rolling Stone. Tour cancelled by the pandemic, we heard her from her home studio in Hendersonville, once home to Johnny Cash and Roy Orbison. Kyshona is a former music therapist with a rich, powerful voice whose songs soar with caring, spirit, deep emotion.