16/03/2023
So today I had to put my big girl parties on! ๐ฉฒ
I generally just want to run & hide when it comes to being in front of a group of people let alone a crowd! ๐ฌ I try and avoid it at all costs.
It Just isnโt my cup of tea.
Over the years long before kids I was put in these uncomfortable situations, and just done them. I felt I had to it was part of my job.
I used to work in real estate doing property management before going to local government.
In that time my boss put my name down to enter the novice auctioneer competition.
I nearly f**king died!
I tried everything to get out of it. It was held at the golf club & the place was jam packed with people.
I could feel myself shaking, sweating, hands were getting all clammy, stomach churning.
My turn came, I got up to the stand & off I went.
Well I done it, I donโt know how - I could hear myself trembling - but I managed to do ok apparently.
I had lots of pats on the back & was told Iโd done a good job - I was confused because I thought Iโd done a crap job - I said โcouldnโt you hear me trembling?? Apparently not!
Maybe it was all in my head.
I didnโt win, but I didnโt come last either!
So to me that was a win! I didnโt come last & I done it. (but donโt ask me to do it ever again lol)
Then after some staff left, I was put in the position to take on all the tribunal cases.
I did assist to start with thankfully. So I learnt to prepare my case and present it at the Tribunal, I was successful with all cases I dealt with, but it was the most awful feeling being there kicking people out of their houses. It didnโt fit with my personality. I done this for a period of time until it got too much for me and the last case I had was a house that was down the road from where I lived, & the guy liked to drink a lot.
I had them evicted, but not before an abusive phone call.
I was crapping myself, he had me in tears.
I didnโt know what this guy was capable of & he knew where I lived.
That was the straw that broke the camels back. I left my job.
So 13 years on Iโve been in local government, I helped introduce new software & we had to train most of the staff. At that point it was fine, we trained groups. But itโs been a good 10 years since Iโve done this. 4 kids later I wasnโt feeling confident at all.
Which brings me to today, I had to train 2 groups today! Big girl panties are on!
So I prepared what I needed & was going to do along with a little self pep talk, got there & the big screen wouldnโt sync with the computerโฆ. ๐คฆโโ๏ธ anyways everyone tried to help, we had a laugh & eventually got it fixed.
What a way to start! ๐คฃ but I got through them without any other worries. ๐
I done it & I was confident! Win win โ
โ
We can do anything, itโs a matter of just getting on & doing it. โ๏ธ๐ซถ๐ป
โค๏ธ
