Providing a space where raw, real discussions on mental health unfold. We aim to break stigmas + more
02/02/2024
I just participated in a story challenge that asked folx to share a photo(s) of themselves at 21 years old.
The first 3 photos you see here are from 2010… 14 years ago.
Not only does it seem like a lifetime ago but it makes me sad.
Sad because the pics I look back on all make me appear to be so happy and living my best life and to a small extent I sort of was.
That is, if you consider refusing to deal with my mental health, physical health and financial wellbeing…refusing to look outside of a life of partying and find out what I actually wanted to do with my life and start working towards that…living a “carefree” life when the raw reality was I was completely and utterly neglecting myself and to this day I am still paying for it.
I get we all go through phases but this phase consumed me. I was using partying and drinking as a HUGE crutch to numb the inner wounds and emotional pain/confusion I was experiencing, which in turn only exacerbated those things.
I can’t lie, I had fun, from what I can remember of it. Looking back now, if I had the choice and power to do it differently, I would.
However, I don’t belittle myself any more or hold a grudge against myself for making the choices I made then, because I wasn’t in the right mindset, I didn’t have the emotional intelligence or maturity like I do now. In saying that, I’d like to think that those experiences helped mold me into the person I am now.
It’s so surreal and weird to look back on these past experiences but I’m at a place now where I for the most part, can confidently and comfortably do so.
I’ve always battled with my emotions and these pictures truly reminded me of how much monumental growth I have experienced and it sucked to go through and it’s a legit never ending process but I am so damn proud of myself for leaning into the process, the messy, uncomfortable and challenging roller coaster of self growth.
Use this as a reminder to take a few moments and celebrate some small or big wins you’ve experienced. We go through so much in a day, week, month & year that we forget to slow down for a sec and reflect on our growth. You’ve come so far, you should remind yourself of that 💕🫶🏼
