Misfit Writers

30/10/2023

"It SO good...!"
99c - VOLUME ONE - Books 1 & 2 - AMAZON HERE:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CLWPMX7W

BOOKS IN THE SERIES:

1. Apocalypse Earth - Road To Hell
2. Apocalypse Earth - Decimation Earth
3. Apocalypse Earth - Second Wave
4. Apocalypse Earth - Earth - Attack
5. Apocalypse Earth - Space - Destruction
6. Apocalypse Earth - Congress Of Nations
7. Apocalypse Earth - Lunar Downfall
8. Apocalypse Earth - Maxi Turbo - THING
9. AVAILABLE LATE NOVEMBER

Apocalypse Earth - Volume One: Writers Like Or Similar To Terry Pratchett Douglas Adams Barry J. Hutchison Simon Haynes M.R. Forbes David Blake Adeena Mignogna Steven Campbell Matt Haig Maz Evans eBook : Laurie, SG: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

03/09/2023

Sigh. Tough day at the office - saving the world, again...


*SG Laurie's "Apocalypse Earth" - like Monty Python's Guardian's Of The Galaxy...!

Buy Book One or read FREE on Kindle Unlimited here:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07GD9FF65


*Book 9 - available December 23.

***Launch page for the ridiculousness writers***

11/05/2023

"Guys! Quick! You gotta let me in...!" - Monty Python's Guardians of the Galaxy - SG Laurie's "Apocalypse Earth - Road To Hell"

1981 - Africa, where life is much like this book, cheap (it was going to be "free" but Amazon said .99c was free enough). Now don't panic, earth is being attacked - by an unbeatable, unrelenting extraterrestrial force hellbent.
And as once mighty First World superpower nations are brought to their knees, one man will do whatever it takes - lie, kill, try bed his cold but super-sexy boss, cheat on his taxes, always behave unprofessionally, definitely politically incorrectly.

The result? An out-of-this-world epic space-comedy adventure...! Read the "Road To Hell", the first book in the Apocalypse Earth series here:

AMAZON UK - https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B07GD9FF65?notRedirectToSDP=1&ref_=dbs_mng_calw_0&storeType=ebooks

AMAZON USA - https://www.amazon.com/Apocalypse-Earth-Outgunned-Outnumbered-Outta-ebook/dp/B07GD9FF65/ref=sr_1_1?crid=39U8UFFQALNDL&keywords=sg+laurie&qid=1680556553&sprefix=sg+laurie+%2Caps%2C187&sr=8-1

03/04/2023

"Guys! Quick! You gotta let me in...!" - Monty Python's Guardians of the Galaxy - SG Laurie's "Apocalypse Earth - Road To Hell"

1981 - Africa, where life is much like this book, cheap (it was going to be "free" but Amazon said .99c was free enough). Now don't panic, earth is being attacked - by an unbeatable, unrelenting extraterrestrial force hellbent.
And as once mighty First World superpower nations are brought to their knees, one man will do whatever it takes - lie, kill, try bed his cold but super-sexy boss, cheat on his taxes, always behave unprofessionally, definitely politically incorrectly.

The result? An out-of-this-world epic space-comedy adventure...! Read the "Road To Hell", the first book in the Apocalypse Earth series here:

AMAZON UK - https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B07GD9FF65?notRedirectToSDP=1&ref_=dbs_mng_calw_0&storeType=ebooks

AMAZON USA - https://www.amazon.com/Apocalypse-Earth-Outgunned-Outnumbered-Outta-ebook/dp/B07GD9FF65/ref=sr_1_1?crid=39U8UFFQALNDL&keywords=sg+laurie&qid=1680556553&sprefix=sg+laurie+%2Caps%2C187&sr=8-1

***Launch page for the ridiculousness writers***

04/01/2023

In one corner we have those who SIT. In the other corner we have those who refuse - they STAND, firm in their beliefs.
And can the situation be improved? J.Peterman's SPLASHBACK - I CAN'T P*E STRAIGHT - & Other Stuff About It, a guide for those who need, ahem, a guide...
- Great Gag Gift For Him - GET IT HERE: USA - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0B5KVD48D

UK - https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0B5KVD48D

27/12/2022

Ladies, your guy a bit of a "loose" cannon in the bathroom? Is his aim off-centre? Would you prefer he sit down to p*e, avoiding the problem altogether?

J. Peterman's "SPLASHBACK - I CAN'T P*E STRAIGHT - & OTHER STUFF ABOUT IT" comes with engaging illustrations and incredibly insightful and helpful step-by-step INSTRUCTIONS to get your other half to p*e straight and WITHOUT splashback!

GET IT ON AMAZON HERE: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0B5KVD48D

Great gag gift - while providing helpful tips and advice for him to improve the problem!

01/04/2022

🔥🔥Nice Guys Sit Down When They P*e T-Shirt - $24.99🔥🔥

In one corner we have those who SIT to take a leak. In the other corner we have those who refuse - they STAND, firm in their beliefs.

And in the other, other corner we have those who COMPROMISE, these guys you see here - so show your support, buy your NICE GUYS SIT WHEN THEY P*E t-shirt now - $24.99

*in white/red/sun yellow/heather grey/steel blue and available from spreadshop here: https://chassis-albuquerque.myspreadshop.com/nice+guys+sit+down+to+p*e-A6245da5fde26f021c2a5b35e?productType=812&sellable=vrOLJvkvAwUxDLVDBNa0-812-7&appearance=1

- Nice Guys Sit Down When They P*e - An Age-Old Argument. But You Can Make Your Stand - $24.99⬅️

18/02/2022

In the back of my mind was a small voice. It said: "A giant comet is heading toward earth and we are all going to die - run...!"
Well, that may be true, but no one has ever stopped to consider the danger of long-term survival of the human species.
Do you see? Imagine, what if we survive? What if we humans just go on and on in the face of every obstacle? That's what we've been doing since we began - surviving. Meh...

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/



MOVIE: Contact - [1997]

07/02/2022

So here they were, one grown man calling another grown man a name. It wasn't a good name. They both knew what it meant and that something should be done about it. Armed with nothing but words and a rabid contempt for one another, the question was, who was going to do something about it first?
Him?
Or him...?

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
Always FUNNY...! Always RIDICULOUS...!

MOVIE - Stargate

25/01/2022

It was a surprise. Not a nice one, not like a group of your closest and dearest gathered in secret - for your birthday - to surprise you - "Surprise…!"
From this point onward was a very delicate time.

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
Always FUNNY...! Always RIDICULOUS...!


MOVIE - The Fifth Element

10/01/2022

His hips thrust against hers and they moaned in unison - about the price of cabs, transport in general and living costs verse salaries.
"Can you believe it?" she said. "Everything's so expensive!"
"And what the heck are we doing in places like Afghanistan?"
They both shook their heads, wondering: What WERE they doing in Afghanistan?


Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/



Movie: Start Trek [1966]

17/12/2021

"Say, you local? Maybe I can pick you up, take you out for a soda sometime. But not here, a nice burger joint - you know, one with a drive-thru? What you think…?”

Misfit Writers brings you the sci-fi comedy series: "APOCALYPSE EARTH" - more humor here: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

Movie - The Matrix

25/11/2021

She went viral. Not around the world - what I mean is she SPAT in my face. She didn’t mean anything by it, that’s just the type of girl she was.
She just didn't like to hear the truth.
Or that maybe, just maybe the jig was finally up.
"The jig's up," I told her. Know what she said? She said: "Please! Don't interrupt me when I'm talking about myself...!"
Then she laughed. It was a startling sound - like a hyena, screaming, because it had been punctured in the throat.

Misfit Writers brings you the sci-fi comedy series "APOCALYPSE EARTH" - more humor here: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

Movie - Escape From [either] LA./New York]

17/11/2021

"Luke!"
"Yeah...?"
"Hey, man, call for you - line one, think it's your dad..."
"All right - gimme a second to finish this and I'll be there!"

Misfit Writers brings you the sci-fi comedy series "APOCALYPSE EARTH" - more humor here: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

06/11/2021

The bus driver had an interesting take on traffic lights - he sped through them. At one set he turned hard left on a red and drove through a shopping mall.
In his favor, he slowed down to better his aim and navigate safe passage at high sp*ed through the startled shoppers...

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

[*movie credit - The Blues Brothers]

29/10/2021

"So tell me, Morpheus, we've been wondering - literary sci-fi, what the heck is it?"
"Literary sci-fi is like any other sci-fi but the quality is much higher - you know, the aliens can read and write and are a little more grammatically accurate?"

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
Always FUNNY - Always RIDICULOUS...!


[*movie credit - The Matrix]
*No one knows which one...

05/10/2021

I held her tight in my arms.
When suddenly there was a noise - from downstairs.
"What was that?" she asked and I held her tighter.
"That? Probably my wife," I said.
"Your wife…! "she screeched, pulling away.
"Shh! Keep it down, if she finds us up here it will be bad for everyone…!"

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
Always FUNNY...! Always RIDICULOUS...!

16/09/2021

“I’m very particular about the men I sleep around with, Mr. Gates, and I don’t know you from a bar of soap. I’m heir to a vast fortune, and, for all I know, you’re the heir to nothing BUT a bar of soap - do you understand, Mr. Gates?”

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
Always FUNNY...! Always RIDICULOUS...!

07/09/2021

Quaid said: "An inordinate amount of black cats has already crossed my path - clearly a conspiracy, a sustained, deliberate attempt to mess with me. Look...!" he said, pointing up ahead in the road.
Two other black cats, about to cross the path of the taxi.
The driver of the Johnnycab said: "Okay, I'll admit - that's suspicious, sir," as they stared at the cats staring at them.

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
Always FUNNY...! Always RIDICULOUS...!



[*movie credit - Deep Impact - 1998]

31/08/2021

"Psst! Jackson...!"
"Huh - what...?"
"You know who I am?"
"Of course!"
"Are you sure?"
"Of course!" he'd said again
On a hunch O'Neill said: "Jackson, am I your mother?"
"Of course!" he'd said again, so convincing even O'Neill had believed him.
"Okay, I was just checking," he said and Jackson sighed inwardly - because it was just easier. O' Neill was a nut, completely unstable by this point.

*The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/


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[SCENE: Stargate - 1997]Still, O'Neill had doubts.

07/08/2021

The sun was beginning to rise. Midnight come and gone, pressing tenderly into the new day, the first distant rays warmly hugging the hostile earth.
Then a voice from the sky said: "People of earth, clue 15, across - like helium but not hydrogen. Five letters - anyone...?"

Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
- Always FUNNY...! -
- Always RIDICULOUS...! -


[*photo credit - Independence Day [1996]

05/08/2021

"You know, Kirk, all my life I've encountered people obsessed with opportunity. Rabid opportunists. Opportunists who indulged themselves at the expense of everyone else. Well, I've been thinking about getting a dog. At least it'll love me. At least it will be loyal, even though I’m not."
"You saying you're not loyal?"
"I'm saying I'm not a dog."

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

20/07/2021

"Vader, I am the Emperor. Therefore, your boss. And right now I just want to rustle up a few handmaidens, take a candlelit bath and, you know, just RELAX a little."
"Yes, my lord," Vader said.
But inside he sighed to himself and thought: Yes, the pressing needs of emperor-warlords in general - when they always briefly inspired a hope in the people, for the people - but were often more in line with gross inhumanities on an industrial scale.
And taking a bath.
He shook his head as he left the Emperor, who called after him: "And Vader, not TOO hot, please...!"

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
Always FUNNY...! Always RIDICULOUS...!


*WHO: Darth Vader & his boss, Palpatine.

13/07/2021

"I told you, I don't have time for 'feelings'. I'm too busy cleaning up - after YOU. Now, for the last time, drop the attitude, pick up your socks and find a job."

Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/



photo-movie credit - "The Old Guard" (2020)

05/07/2021

The sun was beginning to rise. Midnight come and gone, pressing tenderly into the new day, the first distant rays warmly hugging the hostile earth.
Then a voice, from the sky, said: "People of earth, clue 15, across - like helium but not hydrogen. Five words - anyone...?"

Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/ - Always FUNNY...! Always RIDICULOUS...!

[*photo credit - Independence Day [1996]

24/06/2021

And now for the news: "Good evening. I'm Jenny Lerner. A giant comet is heading toward earth and we are all going to die. But first…"

FROM: The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
Always FUNNY...! Always RIDICULOUS...!
[*movie credit - Deep Impact - 1998]

15/06/2021

There was an iciness to her, a layer of permafrost set in her eyes about three foot thick that was completely unrelated to the weather.
And it didn't look set to thaw anytime soon.
So we were in deep doo-do🤨

*The "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/


*[SARAH CONNOR - TERMINATOR]

09/06/2021

New cover for Book 7 in the "APOCALYPSE EARTH" series - to be released 14 June, this month. Yay, the adventure continues...!🦸‍♂️✈️

Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

08/06/2021

People were immediately uncomfortable. The two held onto each other for what was, let’s say, longer than was socially acceptable.

Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

21/05/2021

“Look, let’s not hold a grudge and fall out over this.”
“Really? Well, what do you suggest we do then?”
“Why don’t we kiss - make up a little?”
Obviously that wasn't going to happen. Unable to agree a resolution they continued to stare at one another. Until finally he disengaged from the stare-down because childish engagements with soon-to-be-dead humans were beneath him.

Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

14/05/2021

"Huh...?"
"You guys seeing what I'm seeing?"
"I think we are."
It was a very dark time and they realized what they'd thought at first was a man was actually: A very stocky woman with short hair who'd forgotten to shave.😁

MOVIE: Spaceballs [ 1987] Lovvvvvvvvvvved this...😂

"Apocalypse Earth" - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

03/05/2021

"So, look, man - thing is, that stuff I said earlier, you know, `Hey, Luke, I'm your father'? Well, thing is, I was at the nerve center of an Electromagnetic Coronal Mass Ejection when I said all that. So I'm retracting my earlier statement. So, we cool or what...?"

Scene: STAR WARS - "Luke, I am your father"
Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Apocalypse-Earth-Outgunned-Outnumbered-Outta-ebook/dp/B07GD9FF65/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=sg+laurie&qid=1620073860&s=books&sr=1-1

03/05/2021

He looked uncomfortable, which beat looking poor and down-and-out (and asking for money and handouts), which is what he really was.
But, in the interests of impartiality, I remained quiet and thought: You silly, silly little man - we could have made a much, much better movie, if it wasn't for my surprisingly uncommitted acting...!

Movie: ELYSIUM - 2013
Meh, we really DIDN'T enjoy this one - and what was with her wacky, totally unconvincing accent...?
*Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

09/04/2021

"You get my fax...? I didn't hear back from you."
"What do you want?"
"Well, for starters, a little less hostility. Secondly, what color panty's you wearing...?"

MOVIE: The Fifth Element [1997]

*Do Not Be Alarmed - this post was brought to you in the interest of ridiculous science fiction - most notably the "Apocalypse Earth" series: https://www.misfitwriters.com

31/03/2021

"I give up. Really. I have nothing left to give you when I've given so much again and again. So I give up...!"
"Look, if you're that upset about it, geez, I'll pick up my socks. Honestly, all this drama - over footwear...?"

*ENEMY MINE - Misfit Writer Rating: 10/10

More humor here: https://www.misfitwriters.com

*MISFIT WRITERS bring you a ridiculous sci-fi series - "Apocalypse Earth" - so ridiculous that the destruction of earth is the least of our worries...!

23/03/2021

"... and I was like, say what...? Know what she did? Gave me one of those demure looks over her shoulder only they seem capable of affecting – you know, one of those moments when your feet leave the earth and you black out, repeatedly? And when you came to gravity was restored. You never have that happen to you? Well, anyway, so I said to her..."

* MISFIT WRITERS - The home of silly, ridiculous SCI-FI satire and humor - see more: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

15/03/2021

"You listen to me, young lady, humans don’t improve with age. Getting old you have all these complications. You're going bald, you need your eyebrows shaved, tidied up, things you'd never thought of having to do when you were younger - so take it from me, enjoy it while you still can...!"

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* MISFIT WRITERS - The home of silly, ridiculous SCI-FI satire and humor - see more: https://www.misfitwriters.com/
😁

09/03/2021

"Listen, get your big stinky face outta my face - and brush your teeth!"
"No - when HELL freezes over...!"
"Shows what you know - who's to say hell’s a mono-climate country with a mono-culture of inhabitants? Maybe hell's a climate of varying extremes, like it is on earth. Did you think of that? Anyhow, what I want has very little to do with climatic conditions. Just get outta my face, man...!"

Misfit Writers bring you the "Apocalypse Earth" series - ridiculous, funny sci-fi: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

04/03/2021

"What do we know?"
"Near as we can tell the craft leveled out a few meters above the ground, the fuselage straining under the massive effort and the engines screaming and then began hauling itself skyward again. Flight recorder picked up passengers applauding and hollering what a great job the pilot did.
"Then, about 3 miles out, they were put into an unusual holding pattern - upside down with the emergency slides deployed. Didn't stand a chance."

*SCENE - The "NEW" X-Files - any thoughts about the revived series?

MISFIT WRITERS brings you: "Apocalypse Earth" - funny ridiculous SCI-FI - more info. here: https://www.misfitwriters.com/

01/03/2021

"What the heck is that smell...?"
"You'll have to excuse me, Morpheus. You see, the truth is I have a terribly, terribly dark secret - flatulence. I squeeze one out and there's a stench that hangs in the air - people are frightened, they're VERY afraid. Are you afraid, Morpheus...?"
"To be honest, yeah, I am a little. Seriously, you should see someone about that - you stink, man...!"


MISFIT WRITERS brings you: "Apocalypse Earth" - funny ridiculous SCI-FI and available on amazon - more info. here: https://www.misfitwriters.com/