Ganja Mama Revolution

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Transparency: Why This Site Came To Be!

For a long time, I have struggled with pain management, anxiety, and depression. I have never liked pills or have ever been able to ever take them routinely! Even with antibiotics I have always quit as soon I started feeling better! (I know, you’re not suppose to do that!) I’ve never been good at birth control pills, but with PCOS that wasn’t to much of a problem for the first few years. After my son was born I went on the shot. Which was much easier to maintain then a daily regimen of tablets! But it’s never been in my nature to put pills in my body... the only pills I ever reluctantly elected to take in my life ever, were pills for weight loss or weight management! Pills like Metabolife and Ginkoba among others. And even then I was reluctant. But, I had such a desire or drive to help manage my weight as well, since it too has been a driving factor for most of my life!

But the pain!!! The physical pain... well in 1999 we took out a mortgage on a home, and we became homeowners of our own place! I couldn’t wait to garden and plant flowers and make my space my own! (Yes I love to garden and anything nature, hence why I applied for my patient/care-giver license in the state of Missouri to help myself and others! I just have yet to get my space to start!)

During the summer of 99’, I over-extended my back (or what most people like to call “throwing your back out”) while hoeing the front yard, to lay grass seed in some rather dead patches. I was miserable. It was like having a stiff neck! You know, like when you go to turn your head and you get that sharp pain. Yeah, that was what this was like, only it happened every time I took a step, moved my legs, or put pressure on my feet, etc... I was miserable. But I rested, was bedridden for awhile except to use the bathroom, but I got better and life went on. The following winter I got sick, and had bouts of coughing spells. During one of the coughing fits while in the bathroom I again “threw my back out” and hit the floor catching on to the toilet as I went to help stop me from hurting myself more. I couldn’t even get up. My husband had help me to make it back to the bed in the bedroom. Again, I was down for a bit, not only being sick, but also with a back pain problem of some kind. This was the worst, because every time I coughed, I would re-strain the injury or the inflammation. But again I got better and was able to continue on with normal everyday activities.

January rolls around and I find out I am pregnant and due in September. (There were other complications along the way, but that is for another day!) During labor I had excruciating back lower back labor. It was so intense. Me being one who wanted to try and do it naturally with no pain management was hitting intense pain spasms that finally when it wouldn’t be safe to do it any longer if I waited anymore I said I couldn’t take it and they had to give me the epidural. Ya’ll, I had been scared of this procedure from the moment I ever learned about it! To many what if’s! That’s my anxiety coming into play! The things that go on in my head! Anyways, as scared and afraid of this shot as I was, the pain was just too unbearable for me to stick to my convictions, and I had to break. I was so disappointed in myself! Another one of my internal ways of thinking... but, I lay there resting peacefully finally. And my family watched the contractions on the monitor double in strength and magnitude from where I had been when I took the shot. Ya’ll, as much, as I wanted to hold to my convictions, knowing the contractions doubled in strength and magnitude slowly from there, I now know I would have never lived through that had I tried to do it naturally. I also, think back and wonder, even after the epidural that body is still having the contractions, we just can’t feel them. So... did the contractions at that size and magnitude damage something in my lower back, that I had already experienced strain in twice previously in the last year? But, again I healed and I got better.

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