![Mark was a man driven by purpose. Growing up in poverty, he vowed his family would never endure the struggles he faced. ...](https://img3.medioq.com/649/018/594059176490186.jpg)
08/12/2024
Mark was a man driven by purpose. Growing up in poverty, he vowed his family would never endure the struggles he faced. As a husband to Anna and father to Nicky and Sam, he worked tirelessly to build a successful contracting business. "I'm doing this for them," he'd tell himself whenever he missed a family dinner, a bedtime story, or a birthday. Though proud of Mark's hard work, Anna often felt the ache of his absence. Their children adored their father but rarely had his full attention. Birthdays were celebrated with presents but without his presence.
One December, Mark promised that Christmas would be different. He worked day and night to book an extravagant trip to a luxury cabin. As the trip approached, Mark became consumed with work, determined to finish every project and resolve every issue before leaving. By the time the family arrived at the cabin, Mark was exhausted. He spent the first two days sleeping and the next glued to his laptop. "Just a few more emails," he told Anna and the children, missing their sledding adventures and snowball fights.
"Look, Daddy! You can keep it on your desk!" Nicky beamed, holding up a handmade frame. Mark glanced up briefly, his phone still in hand. "That's wonderful, sweetheart. Thank you," he said before turning back to his screen. Nicky's smile faltered as she quietly placed the frame on the table.
Later that day, while the children played outside, Anna sat beside Mark. Her voice was calm but heavy with emotion. "Mark, we have everything we could ever need—except you. The kids don't care about this cabin or fancy gifts. They just want their father. I want my husband."
Mark nodded distractedly, promising he'd do better once things settled down. Deep down, he was convinced his hard work would be worth it. He wanted Nicky and Sam to attend the best schools, live in a big house, and have every opportunity he never had. He believed they would understand one day.
Years passed. The children grew up. Nicky chose to attend a community college, and Sam followed his passion and attended trade school. Neither pursued the expensive schools Mark had envisioned. They left to live their own lives. One quiet evening, Anna was sitting in the living room, flipping through a photo album filled with memories of the kids. She smiled softly at a picture of Nicky and Sam laughing. Mark walked in, curious, and peered over her shoulder.
"When was this?" he asked, squinting at the photo.
Anna didn't look up. "It was that summer we went to the lake," she replied simply.
Mark frowned. "I don't remember that." Anna turned the page, her silence a heavier response than any words could have been. For the first time, Mark felt a pang of regret that cut deeper than any business failure. He realized he had missed the best parts of life—his family. He had worked so hard to give his family everything, but he had denied them the one thing they truly needed—him.
Just as Mark's family desires his presence and attention, the Lord desires the same from us. He wants us—our hearts, our focus, and our time. The things we often value most, such as time, are what He longs for us to offer Him willingly.
Luke 10:38-42 recounts the story of two sisters, Martha and Mary, who interpreted the balance between time and service differently. The scripture states: "Now it happened as they went that He entered a certain village, and a certain woman named Martha welcomed Him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus' feet and heard His word. But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, 'Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me.' And Jesus answered and said to her, 'Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.'"
The problem in this story is not that Martha is serving. Serving is good. Serving and being kingdom-minded is what we should all strive for. In the story, serving was not the issue. The issue was that Martha became distracted by her service and disconnected from worship. She allowed her work to replace her intimacy with the Lord. On the other hand, Mary chose to sit at Jesus' feet and listen, prioritizing time in His presence. Spending with the Lord is always the better choice!
Let me say it yet again: engaging in ministry or acts of service is important, but it cannot substitute for personal time with God. True intimacy with Him comes through prayer, reading His Word, and listening to His voice. This is how we truly come to know Him—by building a relationship that goes beyond what we do for Him and focuses on who He is.
In any relationship, quality time is essential. Love cannot thrive without intentional moments spent together. We fulfill our daily responsibilities and even engage in work that serves others and honors the Lord, but we must still prioritize spending quality time with Him. It's not just about asking for things or rushing through a quick morning or nighttime prayer. The Lord desires a deeper connection—He wants us to desire and deliberately choose Him, not just the blessings He provides.
As we serve, it's important to consider our motives. Why do we serve? Some may serve because we are called to do it. Some may serve because being in service causes us to have a good feeling (natural endorphins) and gives us purpose. It is good to have a reason to serve. Whatever the reason, serving for recognition or self-glorification should not be in the equation. All glory belongs to God, not to us. The Bible declares in 1 Corinthians 10:31: "So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." Similarly, Psalm 115:1 says, "Not to us, Lord, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness."
When we serve from a place of humility, we reflect God's heart. Pride is one of the most dangerous spiritual killers that Christians face. Often, it takes root, and we don't realize until our responses shock us. We must be vigilant, self-reflect, and ask the Lord to convict us with the truth or the reality, even when unpleasant. Let us strive to serve as an offering to the Lord, always keeping Jesus at the center. We cannot take any glory for ourselves because all glory belongs to Him. This truth must anchor our minds and hearts. There is no room for self-glorification and God-glorification to coexist. They are on opposite ends of the spectrum. As John the Baptist said in John 3:30, "He must increase, but I must decrease." That must be our perspective always. Jesus is the center, the reason for everything we do. All that we do must be for His glory. When pride takes root, it destroys the true purpose of service.
Another consideration in service is balance, particularly with family. Like Mark, we can become so absorbed in serving others that we neglect our loved ones. While we may bring many to the Lord through our service, our families are among our first ministries. Let us follow Jesus' example of balance. We must carve out time to serve, (time to) connect with our family and loved ones, and, of course, time to spend in the presence of our Savior.
Let us not become so busy "doing" that we fail to wait on God, listen to Him, and be guided by Him. When we serve from a place of deep connection with God, our service becomes a true act of worship, glorifying Him and blessing others. Let us continually seek His presence so that our service reflects His purpose.
"O God, thou art my God; early will I seek thee: my soul thirsteth for thee, my flesh longeth for thee in a dry and thirsty land, where no water is" (Psalm 63:1).