Opening Closed Doors

07/07/2023

15/12/2022

Check out the latest episode on the Opening closed doors podcast here www.openingcloseddoors.com

21/09/2022

Join us in the Emotional Intelligence Academy for this informative conversation presented by the amazing -AnnParis-Riviere. We’ll be discussing the power of emotional intelligence and parenting within the context of culture and transgenerational trauma. What are some of the practices that perpetuate trauma in parenting? How can we be more aware and act to halt these practices?

We will be on zoom and clubhouse.

Follow the link below for the clubhouse link.
http://ow.ly/i4wS50KOHXt

Sign up here to download part 1 and to be sent the zoom link:

http://ow.ly/Oer750KOHXy
http://ow.ly/kjbq50KOHXA

09/09/2022

RIP Queen Elizabeth II

07/09/2022

The challenge we have as high achievers is that good is never good enough!

Go easy on yourself!

Success not ONLY about reaching your goal as some of us may believe, it's mainly about how you got and the lessons and skills learn along the way. I was blessed to have a son. I was not trained to be a mother! I was not trained to be a mother of a young man with disabilities - I learnt as I went alone my journey of parenthood. On the way (I believe) I have developed..

RESILIENCE
PATIENCE
LOVE
PEACE
JOY
EMPATHY
...and so much more

What have you learnt along your journey?

06/09/2022

What are you thankful for today?

05/09/2022

Every choice we make has an effect on the outcome of the day, week, month, year!
Choose wisely.

02/09/2022

Fret comes from the Old English word freton which means to devour like an animal. When you fret over something, it consumes your thoughts. It hinders your progression. It holds you back, keeps you stuck, drives you to procrastination!

How do you deal with anxiety, procrastination and worry?

There is a verse from what I call the 'google of life', the bible, which says ' Do not be anxious about anything..' The verse goes on to say, presenting your issues in prayer to God takes off the weight of worry leaving you peaceful and fret free! (Phil 4:6,7)

I know, its' hard to believe right? Well have a go today, present your worry before God and see what happens to the anxiety. This does not mean all your challenges will disappear. It does mean you are on the road to a fret free life because someone bigger than you and I is in total control and has your back.
Happy Friday

01/09/2022

Every day is a chance to choose again. Focus on the opportunities of the new day the new week, the new month .
Happy first of September.
What goals do you have planned for September?

25/08/2022

No one can love you more than you love yourselves!
Hold on.. did you hear / read this correctly?

Yep. No one can ever love us more than we love ourselves.

Be careful how you step into relationships!!

Please comment and let me know your thoughts on this one.

24/08/2022

I just had to post this!
What opinion do you have of yourself?

20/08/2022

Perfectionism never happens in a vacuum. It spreads quickly to those around us resulting in a toxic stifling environment.

Have you wondered why colleagues, family or friends leave when you arrive? Have you wondered why you are struggling t loose weight or why you get so irritable?

Take some time to notice your thought pattens and self talk. Are you speaking kindly to yourself or do you expect 'perfection' from you?

What are you afraid of? What weight are you carrying?

What are some of the 'chains' you are carrying around you neck?
Doubt?
Fear?
Shame?
Hate?
Who do you need to forgive?
Who do you need to apologies to?

Its time! Release yourself from these weights! Take courage, have some self compassion and make connections.

There is no time like the present. Make this weekend a time to start small but...START.

19/08/2022

Revisiting perfectionism: I few posts ago I described the what, why and how to become more aware of the effects of perfectionism. I love the way Brene Brown in her book - The Gift of Imperfection puts it. She talks about the link between perfectionism and shame.
Where perfectionism exists, shame is always lurking. Shame is the birthplace of perfectionism! When we don’t claim shame , it claims us
Further myths of perfectionism
1. Not the same thing as striving to be your best
2. Not about health achievement and growth

Perfectionism is the belief that if we look, live and act perfect, we can minimise or avoid the pain of judgment, blame, and shame.

She describes shame as the '20 ton shield we lug around thinking it will protect us. It is the weight that prevents us taking flight'.

Shame prevents us taking risks, making the first move or excelling in business, relationships or education.

Shame says - I am bad while guilt (sometime can be a good thing) says what I did was bad. In other words, shame destroys self - worth, self value and wellbeing, guilt informs us that the behaviour needs to change.

Bréne talks about building SHAME RESILIENCE because at some time or other, we will experience shame in our life. The key is how to be aware of the factors that inform us about feeling ashamed. She highlight 4 indicators:

1. Learn to recognise and understand your shame triggers.
2. Develop high levels of critical awareness about your web of shame.
3. Be willing to reach out to others.
4. Become able to speak about shame.

Vulnerability is the antidote to addressing shame. Do you have a 'vulnerability' partner? Do you have someone you can talk when overcome with feelings of shame?

18/08/2022

Excited to be releasing Episode 011 of the opening closed doors podcast. Listeners will be inspired by the Giant thinker Ram Castillo , Design Director, 2 x Author, Speaker, CreativeLive Instructor, Business Coach, Certified Chair and Approved Advisor based in Sydney.

The unconditional love of his mother, commitment and resilience of his father and the legacy of his grandmother is apparent in his passion and mission. Ram thinks deeply and intentionally about his self-development and the personal development of others. He is prepared to open doors and do what to takes to achieve his goals.
Go ahead and subscribe to the podcast.
Listen to full episode via amazon, apple podcast, spotify of follow the link in my IG linktree in my bio or listen on the openingcloseddoos.com website - www.openingcloseddoors.

Looking forward to hearing your reviews

18/08/2022

Excited to be releasing Episode 011 of the opening closed doors podcast. Listeners will be inspired by the Giant thinker Ram Castillo , Design Director, 2 x Author, Speaker, CreativeLive Instructor, Business Coach, Certified Chair and Approved Advisor based in Sydney.

The unconditional love of his mother, commitment and resilience of his father and the legacy of his grandmother is apparent in his passion and mission. Ram thinks deeply and intentionally about his self-development and the personal development of others. He is prepared to open doors and do what to takes to achieve his goals.
Go ahead and subscribe to the podcast.
Listen to full episode via amazon, apple podcast, spotify of follow the link in my IG linktree in my bio or listen on the openingcloseddoos.com website - www.openingcloseddoors.

Looking forward to hearing your reviews

17/08/2022

Because you are worthy!

11/08/2022

Announcing the release of Episode 10 of the Opening Closed Doors Podcast with the powerful Cherlene Wilson. Look out for this episode at 12pm GMT today.

Cherlene Wilson describes herself as being ‘emotionally healed, whole and powerful’. In this episode of the Opening Closed Doors, Cherlene shares with us her powerful, inspiring life story. The vulnerable and vivid description of her childhood longing for paternal ‘emotional presence’ through to teenage trauma and attempted su***de, provides an open door into her resilience and the backdrop of her successful Emotional Wholeness career.

Her insights into generational trauma and the impact of parental self-awareness and emotional maturity in childhood development shines a light on her personal journey and authority. Her thoughts demonstrate a sound understanding of the roots of positive interpersonal skills and its effects on performance in later life.

Listen on Spotify, Amazon, Apple podcast or www.openingcloseddoors.com

11/08/2022

What brings you joy? What do you find yourself dwelling on? You can have the choice to create joyful moments. What sparks joy for you? Share some of the things that sparks joy for you. Share in the comments below?

10/08/2022

I am so excited to announce the latest episode of my podcast - Opening Close Doors with Wanda Scott. In this episode, Wanda shares her journey . As a woman of Christian faith, Wanda shares the part God plays in her life.
Check out this episode on Spotify, Amazon, Apple Podcast or follow this link https://directory.libsyn.com/episode/index/id/24018033.
Also available my website www.openingclosedoors.com or www.sophianicholls.com. Leave a review and a 5* rating. Happy listening.

21/07/2022

RESISTANCE

Have you ever had a new project to work on and you just cannot seem to get round to doing it? Have you ever cancelled at the last minute for a romantic date? Have you found yourself getting anxious, angry or agitated when you have to start actually working on a brilliant idea for a business? You could be experiencing RESISTANCE.

Resistance often comes when things are going well in our lives. It is ironic… When we have a problem to deal with, we seem to be able to press forward and get through it. Resistance seems to creep in when things are going good and we have a faint glimmer of life ‘going well’. This can be daunting and uncomfortable for some of us. There is a chance of thriving instead of the safety of surviving.

Resistance is your way of slowing down and making sure that it’s safe to get attached to something new and important. In some cases, it can also be a warning sign that something isn’t quite right so you might need to step back and regroup.

Resistance is not the same as procrastination. The feelings of resistance are signs that something might need refocussing.

Releasing Resistance Requires Refocus

Here are 5 tips for releasing RESISTANCE as we navigate our life journey..

1. Be clear on what you want
2. Be clear on why you want it
3. Be clear on when you want it
4. Be clear on any unconscious beliefs that are preventing your progress
5. Be inspired to step back in and show up

Having a clear roadmap towards your goal and really wanting to achieve the goal with clarity, releases the ‘hand - break’ of RESISTANCE.

Jump in the drivers seat and LET GO!!

19/07/2022

Have you ever wondered what you can do to take a break? Unpaid carers often express 'I cannot find time for ME" or 'I feel GUILTY when I take time for me'.

Self-care or looking after YOU is crucial for YOU and for those you care for. Don't wait until it's too late.

Here are 50 ways to take a break.

Let me know which one resonates with you?

17/07/2022

A young couple moved into a new neighborhood.

The next morning while they were eating breakfast, the young woman saw her neighbor hanging the washing outside.

"That laundry is not very clean; she doesn’t know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap."

Her husband looked on, remaining silent.

Every time her neighbor hung her washing out to dry, the young woman made the same comments.

A month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband, "Look, she’s finally learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this?"

The husband replied, "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows."

And so it is with life… What we see when watching others depends on the clarity of the window through which we look.

So don’t be too quick to judge others, especially if your perspective of life is clouded by anger, jealousy, negativity or unfulfilled desires.

"Judging a person does not define who they are. It defines who you are."

— Jonathan Kestenbaum

14/07/2022

UNDERSTANDING SELF SABOTAGE

Self sabotage is a coping mechanism.

It is what happens when we refuse to consciously meet our innermost needs. This could be because we are unsure whether we can handle those needs when they are met.

The unmet need to 'find yourself' could result in sabotage in relationships. Can you handle being alone?

The unmet need to 'follow your dream in creating great art' could result in sabotage in professional success. Can you handle societal measures of success?

The unmet need to 'believe in your ability and in yourself' could result in negative self- talk because believing in yourself will result in going into the big wide world and taking risks towards success. Can you handle the vulnerability?

What does SS look like? This will be different for everyone however there are some behaviours that are seen to be indicative of self sabotage.

Perfectionism is one of these behaviours.

Perfectionism is wanting everything to be perfect the first time!
Perfectionism is not a great thing.
Perfectionism is a hindering thing because it sets up unrealistic expectations
Perfectionism holds you back from showing up and trying or doing the work!
Maybe because we are afraid of failing?

HOW ABOUT....

Instead of Perfection, focus on Progress
Instead of having something done perfectly, focus on just getting it done
From there you can edit ,build, grow and develop to exactly what your vision is.

If you never start, you will never arrive!
I would love to hear your comments on this. Comments on how you are overcoming perfectionism would be great.!

12/07/2022

Time to Think about Taking Time for U!

Put on your mask first so you can help those around you. It's selfish NOT to care for U than to Care for U.
On this National Simplicity day, think about one myth you hold about self- care.

What would it feel like today if you did one simple thing for you without feeling guilty? Yes, I know that feeling of GUILT when you have a million and one things to do as an unpaid carer?

So today, do one simple thing that is just for you.
An hour sitting by water
An hour reading your favourite series
An hour walking though a field (don't forget your hay fever tablets :)

Take some time for you today.

It's OK, no one will judge you only YOU so tell YOU, its OK to Take Time for me TODAY

11/07/2022

Excited to be announcing Episode 8 of my new Opening Closed Doors Podcast with Tina Vaphiais from https://www.instagram.com/oluvme/.

A successful youth coach, founder and CEO of Oluvme (a community for women and children to receive help and guidance) Tina Vaphiadis shares her personal journey with vivid imagery.

Closing Doors to a toxic relationship, to the freedom of living her life like a phoenix rising from the fire of negativity. Tina shares the impact on her family as a result of the toxic relationships and how she left, opening the door to living a life full of gratitude, forgiveness and accountability.

Tina describes the importance of ‘owning your baggage’ and moving from victim mode to making the choice to be free. She shares the road from ‘forgiveness to freedom ‘and the route to ‘embody’ gratitude.

Tina say ‘We are not honest because we don’t want to have the difficult conversations. If we hold back we carry the sacrifice resulting in resentment and not love. Take the baggage off!' ‘Forgiveness is not easy but you have to let that burden be carried by the other person. It’s their burden’

Tina relates how her experience shapes the way she supports young people going through family divorce. Speaking about generational trauma she says, ‘I saw myself in her (her daughter's) eye and this really woke me up.

Listen on apple podcast, spotify, amazon or www.openingcloseddoors.com

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/opening-closed-doors/id1617974038https://open.spotify.com/show/3PQi3H74EwakNIHzzaWRPf

Don't forget to like, download and share. I would appreciate any comments too.

10/07/2022

Love is a choice not just a feeling.
Your choice matters! Choose well.

07/07/2022

Self Sabotage has limited relevance to the purpose driven life.
How many of the following behaviours do you find yourself exhibiting?
1. Avoiding conflict
2. Disorganised
3. Procrastinating

Walk in your purpose.
Kick self sabotage to the kerb!

05/07/2022

As Carers, the journey can be long. Remember to put fuel in your ‘tank’ because if you run out you cannot carry on.

…. Self Care Matters, Carers matter!

03/07/2022

“Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult-once we truly understand and accept it-then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.”
― M. Scott Peck, The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth
A reminder!

Happy New month. Let's make it count. Your trials are opportunities for growth! The butterfly had a challenging journey yet comes out strong, balanced and ready to go.

01/07/2022

Happy 1st July! As you move into the second half of the year, *‘Plan for what it is difficult while it is easy, do what is great while it is small'. Have you set your goals for the next 6 months?
(*Sun Tzu, The Art of War)