ABOVE the FRAY

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ABOVE the FRAY Above the Fray is a weekly podcast where we share advice on parenting, marriage, and life.

We strive to help people live freely and lightly by living 'above the fray.'

🎄We’re not the story headline.We weren’t created to be the center of the story. That’s Jesus's place. He is the reason w...
26/12/2024

🎄We’re not the story headline.

We weren’t created to be the center of the story. That’s Jesus's place. He is the reason we are here. To honor Him with our whole self.

We must decrease and Christ must increase. That is where we get energy, joy, and peace.

I’m saying, if you think it’s all about it you, you’re likely unhappy and frustrated in your marriage.

We mentor wives and couples to help them discover the joy “decreasing” in marriage. ✹DM “Lifelong” for details.


Merry Christmas, friends. We appreciate you and pray God's blessings over you and your families!“For to us a child is bo...
24/12/2024

Merry Christmas, friends. We appreciate you and pray God's blessings over you and your families!

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”
‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭9‬:‭6‬ ‭ESV‬‬

🎄This Christmas, take a look at the claims about Christ. Has He proven to be all that the Bible claims to be in your mar...
24/12/2024

🎄This Christmas, take a look at the claims about Christ. Has He proven to be all that the Bible claims to be in your marriage?

If YES, encourage someone with the hope that you have.

If NO, where are you looking for the answers to your questions?

👀Keep asking and seeking. But in the right places.

➕Search the Bible.
➕Pray and pray with honesty.
➕Get godly counsel.
➕Test the spirits.

🎄““Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

🎄For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.”
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭7‬:‭7‬-‭8‬ ‭

Create traditions that point to Jesus. If it is gifts, lights, trees, family and friends gatherings, music, etc
 point b...
22/12/2024

Create traditions that point to Jesus.

If it is gifts, lights, trees, family and friends gatherings, music, etc
 point back to Jesus.

May it all be a reminder of the miracle and gift
of God incarnate.

Jesus is indeed the reason for the season!

When the world says candy, Santas, material things, drinking, and any other distractions, you don’t say, “ok, I take all...
20/12/2024

When the world says candy, Santas, material things, drinking, and any other distractions, you don’t say, “ok, I take all of it.” Or “I’ll just hide out and have none it.” Instead say, “Here’s Jesus. He is the reason.”

That’s how the devil looses at this game.

This is Living Above the Fray:"Only one life, ’twill soon be past,Only what’s done for Christ will last.Give me Father, ...
19/12/2024

This is Living Above the Fray:

"Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Give me Father, a purpose deep,
In joy or sorrow Thy word to keep;
Faithful and true what e’er the strife,
Pleasing Thee in my daily life;

Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last."

CT Studd, "Only One Life, Twill Soon Be Past"

Actually, don’t just make “a” room for Jesus in your marriage, give Him the whole kit and caboodle. It’s His anyway. Eve...
18/12/2024

Actually, don’t just make “a” room for Jesus in your marriage, give Him the whole kit and caboodle. It’s His anyway. Everything that you have is on loan to you from the Lord.

You’re just the good stewardđŸ™đŸŸ

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.”
‭‭James‬ ‭1‬:‭17‬ ‭ESV‬‬


This post was inspired by a post by and as usual, got me to thinking
 about the Christmas season and marriage.And submi...
17/12/2024

This post was inspired by a post by and as usual, got me to thinking
 about the Christmas season and marriage.

And submission. Jesus submitted. It was submission to will of the Father that he lowered himself to be born in a manger. But it was motivated by an immeasurable love for you and me.

I clearly see how God is preparing us for heaven, the day we will all bow. It is a beautiful hope.

đŸ”„or đŸ„¶ Do you help set the temp in a good way in your marriage? Or are you more like a thermometer, reacting to whatever ...
14/12/2024

đŸ”„or đŸ„¶ Do you help set the temp in a good way in your marriage? Or are you more like a thermometer, reacting to whatever is put out, good or bad?

God calls us to more than thermometer living. It’s harder being a temp setter but there is no gain without pain.

PRO TIP: Choose the thermometer. It’s peaceful. It’s trusting God to be your strength.

Working with youth and raising our children has taught us a lot of lessons that we use in our marriage. I pray this is a picture that someone is blessed by seeingđŸ™đŸŸđŸ’•

God ‘s love is relentless. Nothing is snatching us from His hand. Let’s get crazy, too, by aligning our love with God’s...
13/12/2024

God ‘s love is relentless.

Nothing is snatching us from His hand.

Let’s get crazy, too, by aligning our love with God’s love and pursuit.

Does your spouse know you are on the hunt?

🎁The fruit of goodness is meant to be shared. And we NEED the Holy Spirit to help us. It’s the inner heart transformati...
12/12/2024

🎁The fruit of goodness is meant to be shared. And we NEED the Holy Spirit to help us. It’s the inner heart transformation to match our outer actions.

Goodness can be a game-changer in your marriage. We train to be good wives by looking at God, obeying, repenting, repeat.

By the way, before I hear it, this post can be for husbands also. None of are truly good. We desperately need a Savior.

🎁Regifting is taboo to some but NOT in this instance! The Bible always encourage us that when God gives to us, we should...
11/12/2024

🎁Regifting is taboo to some but NOT in this instance! The Bible always encourage us that when God gives to us, we should never keep it to ourselves. In fact, if you withhold, in many cases, you will loose.

🎁In this season of giving, the BEST gifts you can give your spouse are those given from the Spirit. They cost no money. Bless your spouse by praying for more love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self control.

🎁And when God places opportunities to practice these fruit, you MUST obey.

If you are a big social media person, you’ll get the biggest ego boost for declaring all the non-negotiable expectations...
10/12/2024

If you are a big social media person, you’ll get the biggest ego boost for declaring all the non-negotiable expectations for your husband.

Except, they don’t work. The don’t bring peace. They don’t bring unity.

As wives, we can help establish the kind of marriage we want by being gracious, patient, flexible, giving, receiving, and rarely having to “lay down the law.”

Jesus set an example for us on how to live and live without the heavy hand of condemnation. Marriage done well is a picture of that.

Can you think of any unhealthy and hurtful boundaries we may set in a marriage? âœïžđŸ‘‡đŸœđŸ™đŸŸđŸ’•

If your husband wants to touch your bum
 It’s his. Be glad.He’s not trying to touch another woman’s bum. Be glad he desi...
07/12/2024

If your husband wants to touch your bum
 It’s his. Be glad.

He’s not trying to touch another woman’s bum. Be glad he desires you.

This is what I mean by “Let him be intoxicated by your love.” Generally speaking, men are visual and love to touch their wive’s soft feminine skin.

Dear wife, he married you. He chose you. Of course, he wants access.

BUT. If you always swat his hand, tell him “no”, act like you don’t like it, and make him think he’s wrong for desiring you, he will eventually get the message and stop.

A husband’s intoxicated desire for you is biblical. It is something you both can pray for more of. And the times when we as wives want to *deny access* pray about that too. After having heard from God, then present any concerns on the topic to your husband with respect and honor.

IT’S BIBLICAL
“Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well

a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭5‬:‭15,19‬

YOUR BODY IS HIS
“For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another
” ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭7‬:‭4‬-‭5‬ ‭

I think it takes honest and bravery for wives to look at their own behavior and call it out if it’s not honoring God or ...
06/12/2024

I think it takes honest and bravery for wives to look at their own behavior and call it out if it’s not honoring God or her husband.

I wonder just how many of us wives have essentially tried to be our husband’s Holy Spirit and mama? But you learned and are happy the Lord saw fit to teach you? And life is so much better now, as a result?

Is this something all wives deal with, trying to be their husband's Holy Spirit /mama?

hack defined:A strategy or technique adopted in order to manage one’s mental headspace and daily acts of service to pr...
06/12/2024

hack defined:

A strategy or technique adopted in order to manage one’s mental headspace and daily acts of service to promote love, peace, and oneness in marriage.‹
It is learning to let go of all offenses, real or perceived.

I often come across some đŸ”„ marriage content that is perfectly well said. Sharing some of them here. Which one is your fa...
05/12/2024

I often come across some đŸ”„ marriage content that is perfectly well said. Sharing some of them here. Which one is your favorite?

Had to put in one of our ownđŸ˜…đŸ’•đŸ™đŸŸ

We have to put a reign on our minds if we want a marriage that thrives. Some thoughts need to be crucified. Some, you ca...
04/12/2024

We have to put a reign on our minds if we want a marriage that thrives. Some thoughts need to be crucified. Some, you can let loose to grow unchecked. See the below list:

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, ➕whatever is honorable,
➕whatever is just,
➕whatever is pure,
➕whatever is lovely,
➕whatever is commendable,
➕if there is any excellence,
➕if there is anything worthy of praise, đŸ’ĄđŸ«¶đŸ©”think about these things.”
Philippians‬ ‭4‬:‭8‬ ‭

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