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Honest conversations about the importance of Care, the many layers of diving deep into Radically cari

20/11/2024

Hospital visits can be/are exhausting. The familiarity of it all. The smell of cleaning supplies along with coolness as if I immersed myself in a meat cooler. Sitting in the room, being present and advocating in an enhanced way.
Splitting my time between home and the hospital along with making sure I still bring in $$$ is a lot. I find that the more time I spend away from the hospital I am rested but also the mistakes and uncomfortably of my dad having no extra advocacy support lingers.
The time I spend gets shorter and shorter and I always with other various tasks and needs never happen to be there when the doctors show up. Which makes the advocacy process a little harder
Having both of my parents in different places brings up a lot of back and forth and navigating care in different areas while also advocating for self in various spaces as well.
Being an advocate for my loved ones especially when they are even more vulnerable is deeply important. I know them on a personal level as well as their health history backwards and forwards. I have found out that when I am there things are just as intense when I am not.
Tensions build more when I am not present and miscommunication happens so much. As well as a lack of empathy and connecting on how best to communicate with them. I am extremely grateful for all those who choose to be in medical profession and work in the hospital setting.
It’s a lot of work and I appreciate all that, we have far more good experiences than bad ones. However the bad ones are happening far more frequently.
With that comes a responsibility to make tough decisions on advocating in way more assertive ways and not holding back and asking for different doctors and even sometimes nurses and expressing how best to communicate and support my parents.
This is what makes it more exhausting not feeling safe and comfortable having them there without me because of things I witness, hear firsthand or even secondhand.
Caregiving does not stop when they are in a healthcare facility sometimes its importance and difficulty is expanded.

03/11/2024

This is 34!
I have been 34 for a full day now and to be honest it does not feel a whole lot different than 33. I usually do some kind of celebration in honor of my birthday. This year I was not really feeling it. The majority of people closest to me live really far away or were out of town.
So I kept it simple, I went out to my favorite Japanese steakhouse with my parents and one of my best friends and her mom.
My 33 year was one that kept me on my toes, I learned a lot and started truly creating passion projects and offerings. Diving in to my writing especially my poetry again and began the process of rewriting my caregiving memoir, while also working on two separate poetry collection books and another book. Yep four different books all at once.
Launched my first 31day Radical Self Care Embodiment Journey (course) one more will be happening in December of this year.
Gonna have lots of offerings for this in 2025 as well as a new offering dropping in Summer 2025. As well as the completion of both poetry books and the 2nd draft of the memoir.
34 is about creating, living, learning and being present in the journey.

30/09/2024

A week ago today. My mom, Bella and I drove back home from Panama City Beach where we surprised my Nana for her 99th birthday celebration. It was a lovely time seeing family and having a little getaway just the three of us.
This trip was a lot of behind the scenes lists, prep work and making sure I had people ready to help support my dad if needed. Since we were a good 6.5+hr drive away. The most important thing was that we had in case of emergency contacts to help him.
Everything went well and no emergency’s happened to us while we were gone or to him while we were out of town. One of my biggest fears is something happening while I am far away.
This trip had a lot of discomfort and a much needed space to relax and figure lots of things out. Also it was lovely to have one on one time with my mom and for my dad to have much needed alone time as well.
Also Bella was great the whole time we were on the long car ride there and back and in the Airbnb. It helped me see the possibility of doing something like this again maybe a solo trip with me and Bella.
The truth is I was able to really recharge while I was away from home.

26/09/2024

Our journey together is gonna be held with love, support and what I define care as. Compassion, connection, awareness, authenticity, respect, regeneration, empathy and empowerment.
This is everything you will receive on our 31days together. Still have openings available link in bio to sign up. Please feel free to message me with any questions you may have.

18/09/2024

Radical Care is how you define for self. I define radical care as embracing and embodying what care means and represents to me and how I carry that out in the world.
Care is so immensely valuable and important and until it’s the forefront of how our systems function it will be Radical.
My first radical self care embodiment journey starts on October 1st. Comment the word CARE on this post and I will send you more information on this offering and how to sign up.

12/09/2024

Foundation of Care.
For me I define the word Care with these 8 words.
Compassion, Connection, Awareness, Authenticity, Regeneration, Respect, Empathy and Empowerment
True compassion takes deeply connecting with self and others.
Awareness is the cornerstone of life and helps guide being authentic and standing in one’s authenticity
Regeneration is allowing self to renew, grow. The path of releasing and learning which allows an understanding of respect for self and others for who they are
Empathy to support and honor someone else for what they have experienced, are experiencing or going through. Connecting with them as a support to empower them to be true to themselves even in the mucky waters of life.
Care is an embodiment that bridges communities and love. It allows us even with our differences of experiences of life, upbringing and so much more to share space and truly allow our humanity and core of self to shine and allow others to shine as well.
I want to support others while they open what care means and represents to them. To embody their journey into radical self care.
My first 31day Radical Self Care Embodiment Journey starts on October 1st.
Comment the word Care and I will send you the information for this offering

10/09/2024

I have been sorting my mother’s medicine for close to two years now. Late last week my dad and I were having a conversation and he mentioned to be has been doing well with taking his meds regularly. Something I have been noticing for a while. We discussed and I ask if he would find support in me using the same system I have for mom.
He thought it was a great idea and so starting this Sunday I will be setting up daily meds for the whole week for both of my parents.
Morning, Afternoon, Evening and Bedtime. Radical self care Embodiment represents so many things to me and when I do this weekly task I have done for close to two years now. I remember the importance of how much focus and presence goes in to it. Even though it’s habit I check the bottles make sure all the pills are in the correct spots and there are non missing or any duplicates.
Only focusing on the task at hand, anytime my mind wanders or I start to tense up I think about my concentration on sorting medication. Why because it has be go to the task at hand.
Am i perfect? Absolutely not. Do I loose my way and think about a multitude of other things sometimes? Yes I do. Do I make mistakes and get short or exhausted? Absolutely.
I remember I am human and while I do have roles that require a deep sense of paying attention to detail especially my caregiver role. I am learning and supporting myself in being my full authentic self.
The one I am discovering more about everyday and embracing the journey even in the mess not as strength but as being vulnerable and allowing myself to be a mess, experience sadness, anger and a whole other range of emotions
This is why I created the Radical Self Care Embodiment Journey. 31 days or diving in to embodiment practices that are tailored for each individual. To create community and to inspire each other and ourselves to honor or humanity and dive in to what Radical Self Care means and represents to us.

Want more information click yes on the poll and I will send you information about the program for the month of October.

30/08/2024

31 day Radical Self-Care Embodiment Journey Swipe ⬅️. Look ⬇️
I BELIEVE THAT WE ARE ON THE EDGE OF A MASSIVE CULTURAL SHIFT
TOWARD A WORLD OF DEEPER CARE...but we live in a Culture of Harm that has systematically held us hostage, away from our deepest needs, away from each other, and away from the Earth.
I believe that we get to embody all the parts of ourselves - including the dark, messy,
“flawed” parts - with open and loving arms. I believe that the more we practice accepting our whole selves, the more easily we can care for ourselves and others.
The Radical Self-Care Embodiment Journey is for you if...
You’re feeling checked out and unable to connect with life, and you’re ready to be seen and heard in your full humanity, flaws and all with open, loving awareness.
You’re feeling exhausted and overwhelmed, questioning yourself and what you’re doing before you even begin the day, and you’re looking for a space where you can go within to experience peace and carry it out into the world with you.
You want to stop feeling afraid of change, even if it’s change that’s for positive growth
You’re feeling doubt, shame and guilt around making space to care for yourself in the midst of all your already caring for and desire support in cultivating a practice of grounding to help you connect to what you need so you can be resourced for life as it shows up.
You’re longing for embodied awareness so you can authentically make choices toward deeper freedom
You’re ready to connect with others who are longing for the space to practice radical care and embody new practices and loving feedback from community to embody the change you desire
Have any questions please reach out via DM
Sign up starts on September 1st

28/08/2024

I have been a Busy Bee lately..
Including the fact that we discovered that what we thought was a start of a bee issue was actually one that had been there for years.
I am glad these bees felt safe and secure to create a home in our house. However I am extremely grateful that will have a new home where they will thrive.
I am excited to share some new coming up of my first offering and community space that focuses On Radical Care.
Also looking forward to hopefully what is a break in house related projects being complete for the foreseeable future.
I feel like I discovered the bee’s at the perfect time as a reminder to create and be in community’s again. To co-collaborate, co- create and to connect, grow, heal and transform

07/08/2024

My backyard has been one my quick access oasis. A space where I decompress, creat, allow myself to feel fresh air and take in the warmth of the sun. Life is life and in that lately I have been on the edge of my seat. I am still learning in this role of caregiving. A lesson I will always be a student in. So much changes it seems on the daily. I have been doing this for over seven years now and there is still so much to learn and lean into.
You see this last year there has been a lot of unhappiness and frustration on my end. I got attached to so many ideas of what was to become and choices that would be made when situations came up. I was wrong and I felt shook up. My own intuition of what I thought would be done did not happen. My unhappiness is because I allowed myself wholeheartedly to believe in an outcome that did not happen. It is due to my belief the nasty and hurtful things that have been thrown in my face almost on the daily by one of those I care-give for.
So many times I wanted to walk away and say I’m done, tapped out, ready to not be in this role anymore. Then it dawned on me I would not be happy if I just left. I would be miserable and I would beat myself up. So I created the space to dive within and create safe spaces around my home for me to be by myself.
The backyard quickly became one thanks to my lovely dog who loves the outdoors and has brought joy and energy to my life. Caregiving for someone who is emotionally abusive is not easy, it’s a challenge and I don’t take the abuse lightly. I go through ranges of way to shield and protect myself from it.
Crying daily has become a Practice in moving through the raw emotions I try to suffocate myself with as a way to not buy in and believe what this person says to me about me to be my truth
My backyard is my oasis

08/07/2024

Hi, I’m Avis Adele. I’m a Radical Care Empowerment Coach. I help care workers and patients connect with our personal power to advocate for our highest selves and our deepest needs, without slipping through the cracks in our current care systems and institutions.

I specialize in working with care workers; the care professionals, caregivers, parents, and patients, who want to advocate for their personal care needs and the needs of those they love and care for, without being disempowered by systems of power and privilege that limit what care is given and determines who gets care and who doesn’t.

Instead, I show you how to advocate for a radical ethic of care that values compassion and connection, awareness and authenticity, regeneration and respect, and empowerment and empathy. I do that through Radical Care, where I help Radical Care Workers navigate the Culture of Harm that can get in our way when we start to Radically Care for ourselves, each other and the planet.

That way we don’t internalize the self-hatred, self-blame, “not-doing-enough” and burnout that the Culture of Harm can show up as in our personal care journeys, and instead, we are Free to Care, Radically.

This is our work together in Radical Care.

25/06/2024

Caregiving- Care Work is a journey that constantly changes. Full of change, intensity, lists that continue to grow and grow. A journey where this a lot of surrendering, looking inward, learning new things, connecting and communicating in new and expansive ways. I have experienced so much these last 7+ years and the journey continues to change and adapt.
These last couple of months I have had to dive deep with in and do a lot of stepping back. A lot of self reflection and a lot of standing my ground and standing up for myself. I call the period in the journey the reimagining stage. The building a new and blossoming fresh perspectives, tasks and so much more.
I am silent a lot now more than I have been. Tension is high and well things are shifting. To be honest I surrendering and gave up so much more than I ever should have to walk in this journey. Choices were made and I am in this space now of having to decide not to give up any more.
I had so much saved and built up a lot and now I have $10,000 in debt. And no savings to speak of. I keep going from a space of do I stop the majority of what this caregiving journey is and shift it majorly.
However i truly don’t know what the right choice is and I don’t think I ever will. No one should ever have to become financially unstable to care-give for there loved ones. Yet here I am at a crossroads. Applying to jobs like crazy and continuing the work I love to be more financially abundant by being self employed. While also doing all the caregiving related things in between.

07/06/2024

My journey is growing, changing and blossoming in various capacities. My first love has been writing. I wrote a book about my caregiving journey from April 2017- December 2021. It was extremely therapeutic to write this book. I feel called to share that this version of the first book I wrote will not be the one published or shared first.
I wrote it for me as a way of expressing my inner dialogue, healing the experiences that were still holding me hostage and well to say I wrote a book from start to finish. I am so extremely proud of the fact I made this happen.
Excited to dive in to what my first published book will be. This journal is the space I write my poetry, a gift given to me by my dear friend for my 33rd birthday.
Today is her 33rd birthday she has been with me through every moment and major life event since 3rd grade and she has always believed in me especially when it comes to my writing and my poetry. Long before I ever believed in it.
So I’m extremely to dove in to this journey of the unknown in f writing poetry and sharing it for the masses in so many various ways. This page here is dedicated to my caregiving journey and my podcast all about Radical care.
I have a created a page dedicated solely dedicated to my poetry please follow if you feel called.

05/05/2024

This is our lives intertwined in February 2017 when we did the last part of transformational training course together. Another soul friend I met in my mid-late 20’s. Let’s talk about how she has shown up in ways that still blow me away. She has sent us food, shown up in front of my house, sent gift cards randomly in the mail. Sat on the phone once while I threw up because I thought I had a possible exposure to you know what right after my mom got a biopsy to confirm her Lung Cancer Diagnosis in June 2020.
She is fierce, inspiring, compassionate, intelligent and passionate about health in all the areas. Physical, emotional and mental. She has called me out on so much and has walked beside me through the entirety of this journey in ways of coaching, advocacy, listening and being her authentic amazing self.
She lives around 200 miles away and yet I feel as if she is right next to me whenever we connect. She believes in me and all I am up to, she inspires me to keep going and sharing my authenticity in so many ranges of ways. she will be writing the forwards to each and everyone of the books I write.
This woman has blessed my life in ways I am still unraveling. Thank you for being a soul friend and being in my life through this intense journey of caregiving. A lot of people left. You not only stayed you broke down the walls that I kept trying to put up.

01/05/2024

It’s official the 1st of May. In May 2017 my father got an official Diagnosis of Bladder Cancer. May happens to be Bladder Cancer Awareness month and I will be sharing about the caregiving aspect of having a loved one with bladder cancer. He is in remission and while that is a beautiful gift the things that have transpired due to that diagnosis have expanded his health care needs and come with other health issues.
Stay tuned for content that’s informative, fun and most of all authentic when it comes to being a caregiver of someone who has had Bladder Cancer.

27/04/2024

This is my friend our lives crossed paths in March of 2017. Just two months before my caregiving journey started. This amazing woman has shown me a deeper understanding of the meaning behind friendship. She has cared for me deeply since the moment we met. She has made me laugh numerous times and held me when I have been down. I never knew that some of the most impactful, wonderful, loving and profound friendships would be of people who I met in my late 20’s.
Her heart is so full of love, joy and the way she always reminds me that she cares and she is there for me is truly a gift and a blessing. Our lives crossing paths was an absolute blessing. I have seen her become a mom twice. She is a sister, a soul friend, a person who has believed in me from the start, has supported me in more ways than I can think of in this moment.a genuine, down to earth, out of the world outgoing person who I am deeply profoundly blessed and lucky to have to have as a friend. Seven years of you in my life through death and grief, lost of friendships, motherhood for you, caregiving for me, dog additions for both of us, moves, and so so so much more. I know I got you and sure hope you know you got me as well.

21/04/2024

This is my friend . We have been in each other’s lives since 3rd grade. 1999 was the year we met and this year marks 25 years of friendship.
A friendship that has gone through so many range of stages in life. There was a period for a year where we did not speak. Thinking back to that year it flew by and how once our friendship grew again. No time passed and we connected again, healed and moved forward through what caused the pause in our friendship.
May 2017 my mom and I were at the hospital while my dad was getting the tumors removed from his bladder. All of sudden Mara and her mom Michelle’s walked in kept us company while we waited. It was a surprise and was much needed.
This was only about two months after we connected with each other again. She has been one of the biggest support system I have had in this season on my life.
A friendship that has shown me she is family through and through. I want to highlight this relationship here because relationships are important to me especially ones outside of the journey.
She has been there through all my parents cancer diagnosis’s and so much more that goes beyond that. She has been there through the darkest times of my life and even though she does not believe she is someone who is good at supporting people I call BS because her friendship and support has kept me going.
She has grounded me, called me out, listened, honored my boundaries every step of the way without judgement or pushback and she has supported my business, advocated me and celebrated along with me the wins as well as been there durning the falls and breakdown. Please tag below who you are blessed to have support you in your caregiving journey. For the next couple weeks I will be sharing those who have personal supported me.
❤

18/04/2024

My dad’s fistula is not working probably and has not been since they started using it towards the end of last year. So the attempted to but one up farther in his upper arm/armpit area. This is where the surgical attach a vein and artery together.
The vascular surgeon said depending on how it looked up there they would do the best they could to play one but might have to a graft which was they did. The connected a tube inside of his arm which is attached to both the vein and artery.
The bandage on his forearm is from the of fistula which they tied off and the other bandage is where the graft is. This is not the best option as they don’t last as long and more likely to cause infection however it’s better then what is attached and hanging out of his port.
So hopefully in a month-two they will be able to take out the current attachment for his Dialysis and they will be able to use this graft with ease.
Never a dull moment that’s for sure, this is the fourth time he had something done since the fistula was placed back in July 2023.

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July was another slow month for doctor’s visits. Just one this past month. Worked on a lot of big caregiving related tasks. It’s nice and I enjoy these moments of stillness when it comes to be in offices. Two months back to back with only one. . #caregiving #caregiver #caregivinglife #caregivinglife #carecantwait

Season 3- Episode 10 . Connecting with the heaviness without eating away at you. . I share about how I allowed the heaviness of caregiving to eat away at me and deciding to become aware of when that happens and how to not allow it to take a hold of me. The heaviness is real and I get to honor that and I always get to allow myself to be in a space of optimistic realism and how that has greatly supported me through this seven year journey. . #radicalselfcare #caregiving #caregiver #caregivinglife #podcast #podcasting #podcastersofinstagram #podcastlife #podcasters #radicalselflove #radicalacceptance #carecantwait

When we had the consultation with the urologist who would be preforming my dad’s bladder removal surgery. He listed a long list of complications and side effects that could happen after one no longer has a bladder. Also addressing the concerns of what could happen in surgery so on so on. . From each tube a bag is attached which collects and holds the urine, emptied out multiple times a day. I have also had to flush out this tubes once or twice. And we keep an eye on them to make sure they don’t come out too much. Because a tube has fallen out completely twice before . One of the things was kidneys not functioning properly and that the testing might not be able to carry the load alone. . Sure enough three months we learned of this normal Nephrostomy tubes place in each of his kidneys and that he was in Stage 4 Kidney Disease . As its bladder cancer awareness month I wanted to share that even though my dad has been free from bladder cancer since the surgery September 2017 the effects from that cancer diagnosis still affect his health and life today. . He of course has become very use to this process and it’s a part of him he will carry till he dies. The regeneration he has gone through since this journey began seven years ago still amazes today . #caregiving #caregiver #caregivinglife #bladdercancer #bladdercancerawareness #bladdercancersurvivor #kidneydisease #kidneydiseaseawareness

I went deeper on another level in the latest episode. Speaking into the expectations I put on myself, others have put on me and the expectations I have put on others. . In this episode I share about a couple stories of when moments got really intense in my home and words were said out of anger, frustration from a space of operating in defense from my point of view. . This episode also shows how I connect with the unknown expectations I was putting on my parents and how it was effecting our relationship. . This episode was extremely important and was very emotional for me to record. . #podcast #podcastersofinstagram #radicalselflove #radicalselfcare #radicalacceptance #selfcare #caregiving #caregivingtips #caregivinglife #caregiver #carecantwait #lettinggoofexpectations

Caregiving comes with unexpected moments that are like WTF . Like what happened this morning. Thank goodness for having certain medical supplies to keep it covered and safe till I was able to convince him to go along with a medical professional from his vascular surgeons office. . Luckily it did not go all the way down to the graft and the doctor did three horizontal mattress stitch’s. . Get to keep it dry and safe for the next couple weeks with daily bandage changes. Always learning something knew and apparently I did a good job of packing the wound as well as securing it. Go me thanks for all the medical shows I have watched and years of experience in caregiving. . This was the first time I had to pack a wound though. . #caregiving #caregiver #caregivinglife #carecantwait #unexpected

S3.EP8 of the @radicalcarepodcast out now. In this episode I share about how I lost myself in the process and tools I am utilizing to not let that happen again. . #caregiving #caregiver #caregiverlife #carecantwait #radicalselflove #radicalselfcare #podcast #podcastersofinstagram #podcasting

S3.EP7, speaking about making tough decisions. So many choices have been made in this journey and a lot of them are tough in navigating what I can say yes to and what I want to say yes to and what gets to be pushed back or saying no to many things for various reasons. . Listen now where ever you get your podcasts . . #radicalcarepodcast #radicalselfcare #radicalacceptance #podcast #podcastersofinstagram #podcastinglife #caregiving #caregiver #caregivinglife

S3.EP6 of the podcast is all about Relationship Changes. I speak in to why I think people leave without speaking or expressing. Of course it’s my interpretation and opinion of why people have left since the deep dive into my caregiving journey started in June 2020. . Here I am sharing about the death of relationships and how it’s hard. I go deeper in the episode and this is only a 56 second taste. If you personally know me I would love for you to listen to this episode. If you are a fellow caregiver or a mother please listen to this episode. If you are a friend/family member of a mother or someone who is a caregiver listen to this episode. . #radicalselfcare #radicalcarepodcast #selfcare #selfcareforcaregivers #caregiving #caregiver #caregivinglife #caregivingsupport #podcast #podcastersofinstagram #podcasters #podcastinglife #podcaster #podcastlife #podcastsofig

My dad has been cooking again and it’s been such a blessing to see him do something he loves so much.. . I also love how while he is pushing him self to get out of his stage of depression he does not push him self physically and allows himself to take the breaks and time he needs in the process. . He has such a glow about him in enhanced ways when he is cooking. I loved recording him prep the sausage rolls and then having a taste once they were finished. . Also showing him this video, he picked out the song and gave final approval. . #radicalselflove #radicalselfcare #radicalacceptance #cooking #cookingathome #cookingtime #cookinggram #caregivinglife #caregiving #caregiver

In 2017 before my caregiving journey began a friend made me my first ever bubble baths with roses. She told me to relax, enjoy and wow was it absolute magic. I remember how that first one made me feel. I felt so present, so seen and so at ease within my body. It was healing. @thechapelofroses showed me the magic of roses and all they have to offer in ways I never knew flowers could. It has been quite a while since I have felt the petals with my hands and on my body. . Yet the memories of pure therapeutic bliss remain forever implanted in my mind, heart and soul. So here is to another rose bath in my future this week. I am calling it in. . #radicalselflove #radicalacceptance #radicalselfcare #roses #healing #bath #rosebath #magic #caregiving #caregiver #caregivinglife #community #connection #selflove #selfcare #selfcarefirst #selfcarematters #selfcaremagic

Episode five of the podcast is me sharing about what it is like caregiving for multiple people at once. This little taste is me expressing about how sometimes I have to give more attention and support to one of them over the other. . Being the solo caregiver to both of my parents at the same time is a lot of work, navigating through changes different personalities and care duties as well as the constant change that revolves in this journey that is full of unexpected ups downs and in between moments. . #radicalcarepodcast #radicalselfcare #caregiver #caregiving #caregivinglife #carecantwait #podcast #podcastersofinstagram #podcasts #podcasters #podcastinglife #podcastshow

Season 3, Episode 4 is all about Feeling your Feelings. Easier said than done am I right. So in this episode I dive into how I have allowed over the majority course of my life prior to my caregiving journey and through out stages of my caregiving journey putting my feelings aside. Letting them go deep down inside and burying them under the rug. Letting them marinate till the point of a major breakdown/meltdown. That the boiled over so intensely I got to look within in and connect with how truly important it is to feel my feelings and what that looks like and how it can support in healing, releasing, growing, experiencing. . Does feeling your feelings scare you, make you uncomfortable or liberate you? Would love to hear your thoughts. Let me know in the comments below. . #radicalcare #radicalcarepodcast #radicalhonsety #radicalselfexpression #radicalselfcompassion #podcast #podcasting #podcastersofinstagram #podcasts #podcasters #podcastinglife #podcast

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