Purple Ella

31/01/2022

Dog walks are the time when I’m most chill. Which is lucky because the last few weeks have not been chill! Having a minor operation today so not sure how this will impact my content over the coming week. Since my audience is largely autistic/adhd I thought it would be helpful to let you know.
Also good wishes and videos of cute animals welcome 🤗

28/01/2022

In this video I'm explaining the criteria you need to meet for an autism diagnosis in the DSM5.

This would be useful if:
- You're considering whether you or someone you know might be autistic
- You want to learn more about autism
- You are autistic and you want to fully understand the criteria

I also explain some of the issues with the wording of the DSM-5

https://youtu.be/LJJYgOtPpTs

21/01/2022

Is there a link between adhd and addiction? In this video I'm talking about why adhders are more likely to develop addictions and struggle to recover. Knowing why can sometimes help us move forward so I hope this's useful

https://youtu.be/8eqMmvYTgU0

17/01/2022

I had a lovely frosty walk this weekend with Coco. Getting outside is so good for my mental health.
☺️

14/01/2022

Yesterday we commemorated the passing of our friend IndieAndy who was a wonderful person. He was kind to everyone he met, and his loss will be felt by the autism community and all who knew him.

12/01/2022

Scheduling self care. Todo lists are great, but people often only put work and chores on these lists.
I think I thought that self care would take care of itself. Of course I’ll remember my meds, long relaxing baths and time to do art. Except I don’t. I get into neurodivergent paralysis once my work is done and sit scrolling my phone instead of doing things which will help me to feel calm and happy.
So this year I’ve started scheduling my self care. I add one thing to my days list that is self care - that might be art, time with friends, a nice warm bath, Lego or a cheery movie.
I have timers for things like taking my meds; doing my physio and journaling.
That means that my self care is taking as big a priority as my work and chores which is as it should be.
Do you schedule your self care? If not perhaps give it a go.
This is some art I did in one of my self care slots this week.
☺️

10/01/2022

Starting afresh. I’ve not been doing brilliantly lately. But equally I’ve not been struggling as much as I would have done a year ago with the same challenges. And that’s it really - I think I imagine that one day I’m going to be sorted and that it will be a noticeable sudden kind of sorted.

But actually these changes (self care, emotional regulation, dealing with our past and the impact on our now) happen in small increments. Barely noticeable sometimes but happening.

And each day we get to start afresh. Reminding ourselves of our goals and carrying on.

So when you have a bad day try not to think - well that’s it I’m still failing, I’ll always fail. Instead think - I’m slowly taking steps towards the life I want to live. Im not there yet but I am on the path.

07/01/2022

I'm setting some intentions for 2022. Not New Years resolutions, nothing pressured, just some dreams and hopes.

https://youtu.be/WtrHtaJ9Lg4

05/01/2022

This morning I had a meltdown. My youngest is isolating in her room with covid, and the new term starts for the older two.
I was trying to make social media content whilst cooking breakfast, sorting bus passes and providing entertainment for isolating child.
And I realised - this is partly self imposed pressure - which is encouraged by the social media algorithms.
After 6 years making content it hurts when I see people who started one or two years ago grow massive followings and I feel s**t for feeling this way - because we’re doing it to help people so my ego shouldn’t be a factor.
But my life experience - being the unpopular one - and my childhood trauma all play into feelings of rejection and failure which haunt me.
I respond to that by working harder, making more content.
And then when that doesn’t work I feel even worse, it feels unfair. But this world isn’t fair and that’s that.
So I need to get off the hamster wheel. I’ve considered giving up but I love what I do and I love the community who support me.
So I want to move forward making the content I want to make, when I have capacity to make it.
No more - making something only because it’s likely to do well.
Not making something I wanted to make because it will not score highly on algorithms.
Essentially I want to make content I care about and am passionate about not content to feed the algorithm. I want to be me, and those that want to watch that and support that I want to appreciate.
I’m not going to look at other creators in my niche - I’m simply not strong enough to do so without feeling less than. Perhaps one day that will change and I’ll be able to cope but for now I need therapy and to protect myself from my own demons.

I hope this made sense. And for anyone else who feels less than, or not seen or valued for what you do - it’s OK to have these feelings, don’t feel ashamed. We deny these dark feelings because we’re not supposed to have them. But no one is entirely good or entirely bad and acknowledging the dark feelings helps us to change them and do what we need to do to move on.

03/01/2022

How instagram is this pic 😂
I hope you all had a good Christmas and a good start to the new year.
Going back to normal after the festive period is another time of adjustment. So those of us with neurodivergent brains will need to be gentle with ourselves and take it slowly as we ease back in.
So self compassion and self care are the priorities this week 💜

31/12/2021

Since it's NYE I wanted to take a look back at 2021, and what I've achieved and the fun time's I've had with my friends and family.

I hope you enjoy the video and a very happy new year to everyone.

https://youtu.be/IkmGdaLbOpI

29/12/2021

The week between Christmas Day and NYE can be tricky. Routines are changed, extra socialising and it’s harder to eat as I normally do.
I found myself wobbling and turning to unhealthy coping strategies. So I decided to turn it around. Started my day with some yoga and headed to Bath with my family for a change of scene and some family time.
I took this in where we had a lovely lunch ☺️ I wish these wings were real.
💜

24/12/2021

I made this little vlog for anyone looking to escape the chaos for five mins and enjoy some twinkly stimmy lights. So grab a cosy corner and enjoy.

Merry Christmas everyone.

https://youtu.be/5gdJ_LF9Ygc

22/12/2021

This is a reminder for anyone stressing that they’re not ready for Christmas - it’s one day that can be whatever you want/need it to be.
If that’s eating pizza in your PJ’s then that’s OK.
You are under no obligation to make it perfect, or to do things which make you anxious or overloaded. Keep it simple. Ditch some of the must do’s and add in some time to relax and regulate.
💜🎄

22/12/2021

For anyone interested in owner training their assistance dog this is the company I use (Pawsable). They provide support with training, insurance, and help with access issues.

Training your own assistance dog is hard. It's a lot of ongoing work, and it can be frustrating. For me it's been absolutely worth the effort but please do consider how much capacity you have.

20/12/2021

This is my snow globe collection - I love snow globes!
I love collecting things, arranging them, sorting them, and categorising them. During the rest of the year it’s my Lego models, and my popheads but it’s good to have a Christmas collection too.
What Christmas activity brings you joy?
🎄🎄

19/12/2021

This is a link to all my social media channels, and ways in which you can support me as a creator if you’re benefiting from my work and want to say thank you.
https://direct.me/purpleella

17/12/2021

I vlogged a day in my life as a neurodivergent, disabled content creator. I hope you enjoy it.

https://youtu.be/wca3XJ-cptw

(Description: A photo of Ella's head and torso in a rainbow striped jumper, with the words Day in the life (autistic & ADHD) - in the background is a large green field with a purple, orange and blue sky in sunset)

10/12/2021

This weeks video is on the topic of trauma including;
- why trauma impacts our bodies and brains
- why neurodivergent people might be more likely to experience a trauma response

https://youtu.be/7r31FWMjrY0

08/12/2021

Why do autistic people and ADHDers find Christmas tricky sometimes?
1. Executive functioning difficulties impacts our ability to plan and complete the stages required to finish a task. This makes organising everything from gift buying to decorating extra hard.
2. Receiving presents is hard - it might be unexpected and we might need time to process which means we don’t give the reaction people expect and then we feel awkward about that.
3. Food can be impacted by sensory sensitivities and we might not be able to eat the foods we’re served over the Christmas period. Also eating in a group can be difficult and overwhelming.
🎄🎄🎄

06/12/2021

I don’t know who needs to hear this today -
You are enough even when;
You make bad choices
You’re not productive
You respond to stress with an unhealthy coping mechanism
Because in that moment you were doing the very best that you were capable of with the resources that you have. So love yourself because you deserve respect and compassion 💜

03/12/2021

I've been working on new designs for my merch store. Designed and drawn by me so please head to my store to check them out;
https://purple-ella.myspreadshop.co.uk/all

03/12/2021

I'm so excited about tonights fundraising livestream for Dogs for Autism to support the amazing work that they do providing fully trained assistance dogs to autistic people of all ages.

Please join me (no pressure to donate, just come for the fun if you can't afford to) at 7pm GMT
https://youtu.be/MvWSIIeqxMk

If you'd like to sponsor a puppy head here:
https://dogsforautism.org.uk/puppy/

01/12/2021

I was nervous about having two visible teeth out and being someone who makes video content as my job and how I was going to look with a gap.

So yeah here it is - gappy Ella! I know I will get negative comments about this - I already got negative comments about my teeth so I’m expecting more now.

But you know what - my teeth are completely irrelevant to what I do. My teeth do not change my ability to talk about and

My gap won’t stop me being a loud, proud advocate. It is completely irrelevant to what I do so I’m gonna own it! Yeah I have a gap - I’m choosing to consider it cute - and anybody who thinks otherwise will not be impacting my self esteem!

We all have flaws, not one of us is perfect and sometimes those flaws make us who we are today, strong and compassionate. So be proud of your flaws and join me in refusing to feel bad about imperfection ☺️
💜

29/11/2021

Today I had to do a scary thing. I’ve had two teeth out at my dentist and I find dentists really hard and my anxiety is very high when I have to have work done.

So here are my tips for dentist anxiety:
1. Take support - today I took Mr Purple and Coco my assistance dog to my appointment and they were able to comfort me (Mr P reminding me to do my calming breath work and Coco with snuggles and deep pressure therapy)
2. Make sure ahead of time that the dentist understands your situation - so in my case telling them ‘I’m autistic and will need support and may struggle with my sensory issues’
This meant the dentist was prepared and able to make accommodations for me like keeping things quiet and being extra encouraging.
3. Give yourself rest before and after - even if the treatment is minor the anxiety is exhausting and it will be easier to cope if you’re well rested.
4.If you’re needle phobic and need anaesthetic then ask for the numbing gel and when they do the needle ask for a countdown so you know when it’s going to be over - I also close my eyes and think of other things.
5. Take headphones and some calming music to listen for distraction.
6. Take sensory toys to fiddle with your hands if you think this might help.

28/11/2021

I'm so excited about my Christmas fundraising livestream for Dogs for Autism 😊

Join me, and channel regulars Cathie and Ros in the gingerbread decorating competition of the decade! Who will make the prettiest house - you decide.

I'll be donating advertising revenue and any super chat donations to Dogs For Autism to support their amazing work providing fully trained autism assistance dogs to autistic people of all ages.

If you can't be at the stream but you'd like to donate to Dogs For Autism anyway you can do so here https://youtu.be/MvWSIIeqxMk

If you can be there then hoorah, let's have some silly, festive fun!
https://youtu.be/MvWSIIeqxMk
(you can click on this and ask YouTube to send you a reminder on the day)

26/11/2021

Ableism, what is it? And how can we fight it? Find out in this weeks video where I'm also sharing some tips for non disabled people on how they can support disability rights.

https://youtu.be/7MN6lmVq3E4

24/11/2021

Wonder Girl and I are going to see the relaxed performance of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs on the 16th December, 2pm at Bristol Hippodrome

Relaxed performances are so helpful for us because we both struggle with sensory overload. In a relaxed performance any loud or overwhelming sound effects are either taken out, or demonstrated at the beginning so that they're not unexpected.

Also the atmosphere in the auditorium is more relaxed so we don't have to worry about stimming, or reacting in an unusual way and being judged.

If you're local to Bristol click this link for more info and how to book and join us at the panto
https://www.atgtickets.com/relaxed-performances/pantomimes/bristol/

If you're not local here is a list of some other relaxed panto performances you can see in the rest of the country
https://www.atgtickets.com/relaxed-performances/pantomimes/

24/11/2021

I’m having a bit of a hard time at the moment. I had my covid vaccine booster which has hit me pretty hard and I find my sensory issues are worse when I’m feeling poorly. Plus because I have a chronic illness (EDS) any increased fatigue or symptoms seriously reduces my capacity and I feel frustrated that I can’t keep up with my workload and family commitments.
But I’ll be kind to myself and gently focus on getting smaller amount done and taking rest breaks so that I can get back to normal without too much stress.
So if you are autistic and you’re unwell it’s worth keeping in mind that this might affect your sensory processing and adjust as necessary - you might have less capacity and need more sensory care.
💜🌈

22/11/2021

How I wish I could go back in time and give teen Ella some advice. If I could I’d want to say;
- Be yourself, don’t let the world tell you that it’s wrong to be different and don’t work so hard to modify yourself because you will lose yourself in the modifications.
- The bullying is hard right now, and I know you feel like perhaps it’s your fault. But it’s not - the bullies have their own issues that they’re projecting onto you because you’re an easy target. Try to hold onto that.
- You have sensory issues and that’s why you often find yourself feeling overloaded by life
- You are not stupid, school just isn’t set up to support people like you.
- Life will get better, you will find people to love and who will love you back just the way you are. You will find a purpose and one day your struggles will help you to inspire other people in the work that you do.
What would you tell your teen self?
p.s swipe to see my comically bad teen pic.
💜

21/11/2021

For anybody that missed it, this is my interview on BBC Radio 5 live and I'm on at around 1 hours 28 mins in.

The big weekend news and sports stories with Chris Warburton and Jeanette Kwakye

20/11/2021

Just popping into let you know that I’ll be on BBC Radio 5 live at 8.15am tomorrow.
I’ll be talking about the recent news that Christine Mcguiness and Melanie Sykes have been diagnosed with autism.

As well as sharing a little of my own story and the work that I do now trying to raise awareness and understanding.

So for any early birds feel free to tune in and find out if I can make sense that early on a Sunday morning 😂

19/11/2021

In todays video I'm talking about the link between autism and gender diversity. I'm also explaining (as I understand it) the differences between gender ID, assigned s*x and gender expression.

Plus there's some stuff that I'm a tad nervous to share about my own exploration of gender id (and conclusions) from the last few years.

I hope you find it useful;
https://youtu.be/_wAaZBsWTN4

15/11/2021

Some days will be bad. No matter how hard you try, no matter how much self care you practise. It’s part of being human.
And for those of us with ‘stuff’ (mental illness, past abuse, neurodivergence, whatever your stuff is) those days will hit hard.
We can feel like we didn’t make any progress. Or we might as well stop trying because it doesn’t work.
But it is working. It’s just that nothing is perfect and sometimes we stumble.
So don’t give up, keep fighting. Just as I will today on my bad day. I will pick myself up from the floor and keep going.
We have got this!
💜

12/11/2021

NEW VIDEO
Imposter syndrome can affect autistic people or ADHDers in multiple ways including;

-diagnosis doubt (particularly when you're late diagnosed)
-feeling 'not good enough'
-feeling unqualified

I have felt them all! Now that I'm feeling more confident I am exploring this topic and sharing some of the ways that I've been working to overcome these feelings.

Hope you find it useful.

https://youtu.be/Bhj4X7IY9bM