All Things Wonderful and Weird (2025)

30/09/2024

My son is struggling right now. He’s back at college for his second semester freshman year. He’s not happy with his roommate situation, he’s not sleeping, he’s finding it hard to be creative with his work (he’s in art school) and he’s miserable. He has a plan in place to transfer, so he knows this is temporary.⁣
⁣
My biggest fear when he left for college is that he wouldn’t be happy. (I know we all worry about that). His texts to me about how unhappy he is have made me so sad and make me feel helpless. But my heart is also full, because he called me last night at 1:31 am. He knew I would answer, he knew I would get out of bed (to not disturb hubby) and go downstairs and talk to him for as long as he needed or wanted.⁣
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He knew I would hold his heart and hear him out. He knew he could just be silent on the other end and I wouldn’t rush to get him off the phone or to speak. We talked for 37 minutes. He told me he loved me twice and he thanked me for listening. We haven’t always had an easy go of it, but I am so happy he knows I will ALWAYS be there for him.⁣
Credit to the respective owner ✍️

30/09/2024

An elderly farmer went into town to catch a movie. At the ticket booth, the attendant noticed something on his shoulder and asked, "Sir, what's that on your shoulder?"
The farmer replied proudly, "That's my pet rooster, Chuckie. He goes everywhere with me."
"I'm sorry, Sir," said the attendant, "We can't allow animals in the theater, not even a pet chicken."
Undeterred, the farmer walked around the corner, discreetly tucked Chuckie into his pants, and returned to buy his ticket. He found a seat between two elderly ladies named Mildred and Marge.
As the movie started, Chuckie began to stir. The farmer unzipped his pants so the rooster could p*ek out and enjoy the film.
"Marge," whispered Mildred.
"What is it?" asked Marge.
"I think the man next to me is behaving strangely," Mildred whispered back.
"Why do you say that?" Marge inquired.
"He unzipped his pants," Mildred replied, "and he seems to have something out."
Marge chuckled softly, "Oh, at our age, we've seen it all."
"Yes," Mildred sighed, "but this one is eating my popcorn!"

Credit goes to original owner

30/09/2024

Just bought a new house, and my first project was painting the stairs. The entire house was greige, and I couldn't take it anymore! 🙈 After staring at paint swatches for two months, I think I finally got the shades right. 😂
Credit - original owner ( respect 😀)

30/09/2024

NEIGHBORS HATED THE COLOR OF MY HOUSE AND REPAINTED IT WHILE I WAS AWAY — I WAS ENRAGED & TOOK MY REVENGE.
My house is on a corner lot. Two years ago, a newlywed couple moved in next door and immediately made weird comments about my house's yellow color. Soon, they outright DEMANDED I paint it a different color. My house has always been yellow; I love it, and there's no rule against it.
They called the police and the city on me, but both told them to back off since I hadn't done anything wrong. They even tried suing me (the suit got tossed, and they had to pay my legal fees) and attempted to rally our neighbors to form an HOA to force me to repaint. Our neighbors told them to get lost, so now they're alienated by everyone.
I had to go out of town for two weeks, and when I got back, my house was GRAY. I almost drove past it because I'm so used to my yellow house. The neighbor from across the street came over and showed me pictures he took of the painting company setting up and doing the work. He and another neighbor called the police, but the painting company had a valid work order and had been paid, so the police couldn't do anything.
It seemed everything done to my house was legal and no damage was done. But I was enraged and planned my revenge. Next day, I⬇️
Credit goes to respective owner

30/09/2024

Some people are rich in ways others will never understand.

30/09/2024

Mustard powder is a gardener's best friend.Here is why.

Natural Pesticide: Mustard powder can act as an effective natural pesticide. Its strong smell and compounds can deter pests such as aphids, caterpillars, and beetles. Sprinkling mustard powder around plants can help protect them from insect infestations.

Soil Conditioner: Mustard powder can improve soil health by acting as a biofumigant. When incorporated into the soil, it helps reduce soil-borne diseases and nematodes, promoting healthier plant growth.

W**d Suppression: The glucosinolates in mustard powder can inhibit the germination and growth of w**ds. Applying mustard powder to garden beds can help suppress w**d growth, reducing the competition for nutrients with your plants.

Fungicide: Mustard powder has antifungal properties that can help combat fungal diseases like powdery mildew and downy mildew. A solution of mustard powder and water can be sprayed on affected plants to treat and prevent fungal infections.

Nutrient Source: Mustard powder can provide essential nutrients to plants. It contains compounds that, when broken down, release nutrients such as nitrogen and sulfur into the soil, enhancing plant growth and health.

Animal Repellent: The strong odor and taste of mustard powder can deter animals like deer, rabbits, and squirrels from munching on your plants. Sprinkling mustard powder around the garden can help keep these pests at bay.

Composting Aid: Adding mustard powder to compost piles can help sp*ed up the decomposition process. Its natural compounds help break down organic matter more efficiently, resulting in richer compost for your garden.

Credit goes to original owner

24/09/2024

A COUPLE went to breakfast at a restaurant where the “seniors' special” was two Eggs, Bacon, Hash Browns, and Toast for $2.99.
“Sounds good,” the wife said…“but I don't want the eggs..”
“Then, I'll have to charge you $3.49 because you're ordering a la carte,”…the waiter warned her.
“You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?”…the wife asked incredulously.
“YES!”… stated the waiter.
“I'll take the special then,”…the wife said..
“Great…how do you want your eggs?“…the waiter asked.
“Raw and in the shell,”…the wife replied.
She took the two eggs home and baked a cake.
DON'T MESS WITH SENIORS!!!
WE'VE been around the block more than once!…

24/09/2024

24 GENERAL EGG KNOWLEDGE
1. Storing eggs upside-down makes them last longer. Turning your eggs upside down before stashing them in the fridge will make them last longer. Placing the pointy end down in the carton will prevent air pockets inside the shell from coming in contact with the yolk, which helps slow down the aging process.
2. It is generally not recommended to eat eggs from reptiles like snakes and lizards, or other non-bird animals, because their eggs are not a good source of nutrition for humans. They are often high in fat and low in protein compared to bird eggs. Some reptile eggs can carry harmful bacteria or parasites that can make you sick.
3. Washed eggs need to be refrigerated. When a hen lays an egg, with that egg pops out with a nearly invisible coating called a bloom. This bloom helps prevent air and bacteria from permeating the shell and prematurely aging the egg. That is why fresh eggs straight from the chicken are often placed in bowls or baskets on the kitchen counter. Grocery store eggs, on the other hand, have been washed, thus removing the bloom and requiring refrigeration to keep them fresh.
4. The colour of the egg yolk should be very bright yellow or deep orange. The difference in colour is based on what the chicken is eating. Chickens who only eat the grain feed given to them will lay eggs that are yellow. Chickens that are free-range and eat mostly bugs and vegetation will produce these orange yolks.
5. Chickens can still lay eggs even if there is no rooster (Male chicken). Many people think that you need a rooster for a hen to lay eggs. Most of the hens producing eggs today have never seen a rooster in their life.
6. In the stores, you can usually find small, medium, large, and jumbo or extra-large eggs. Some may speculate this has to do with breed, but in the commercial industry, it usually has more to do with a hen's age. The Older the Hen, the Bigger the Eggs. The older the hen, the more likely she is to produce these larger eggs.
7. Apart from using water to test the freshness of an egg, there are other ways to tell if an egg Is fresh:
If the shell seems unusually thick, then it is fresh.
If the yolk stands really tall after you have cracked the egg, it is fresh.
If the yolk has wrinkles or dissolves into a puddle when you crack it open, then it is an old egg.
8. A chicken will lay bigger and stronger eggs if you change the lighting in a way to make her think a day is 28 hours long.
9. Eggs are good for your eyes. They contain lutein which prevents cataracts and muscle degeneration.
10. Breed determines egg shell colour. Commercial eggs are brown or white, but some breeds can also lay blue, green, or pink eggs.
11. Duck eggs are higher in fat and better for baking.
12. Brown eggs are more expensive than white eggs, because the hens that lay them are larger and require more feed.
Credit goes to respective owner

24/09/2024

′′ I have chosen loneliness to defend myself. I protect myself from humanity around me, from this loud and intrusive humanity. I live surrounded by animals, trees, flowers. I have horses, donkeys, rams, goats, pigs, chickens, ducks, geese, pigeons. Then of course dogs and cats. I don't even know how many there are...
I feel much closer to nature and animals than humans. I confess I hate most of the human species. I accepted the cause of animals to finally make sense of my existence here. I'm trying to explain to the man that cruelty inflicted on animals is unworthy, unacceptable, inhumane precisely...
I don't give a damn that the world remembers the divine B. B., that wasn't divine at all.”

- Brigitte Bardot

23/09/2024

Never seen that! Amazing!
Sunflower seeds growing into sunflowers while still in the sunflower.
Credit: Reddit|MrMacBro

23/09/2024

"This is my son.
At about a year old, I overdosed with him in my bed. Well, it was just a mattress on my living room floor.
At 2, he had to come visit me in jail. He beat against the glass screaming and crying for his mommy. He started biting his nails after that.
At 3, he witnessed me get hit in the head with a brick, and my head split open. He rode with me in the ambulance. It scared him really bad.
At 4, he was in a car wreck with me, one of my many DUI's.
At
5, my mother had to raise him most of the time. I barely even came home.
At 6, I lost full custody, and I went to prison.
He is 12 today. He lives with me. He attends a private Christian school. He is on the honor roll. He gets prayed with every night and his mommy is there to wake him up for school every morning. I celebrate all of his accomplishments with him, and he celebrates every sober birthday with me. I tell him how much I love him every day. He’s so kind to the broken because we were once broken. He’s truly so special.
Thank you God for allowing me to be a mother to this sweet boy every day.
It’s the sweetest gift of my sobriety."
Credits goes to the respective owner✍️

23/09/2024

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in awhile a $20 bill fell out onto the sidewalk.
Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."
"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me, Officer."
"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. " Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"
"Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to a Golf course. A lot of Golfers come and p*e through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'why not make the best of it?' So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., buddy! Give me $20 or off it comes!'
"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing ."OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Not everybody pays."

23/09/2024

"...And after a long time the boy came back again.
"I am sorry, Boy," said the tree, "but I have nothing left to give you- My apples are gone."
"My teeth are too weak for apples," said the boy.
"My branches are gone," said the tree."You cannot swing on them."
"I am too old to swing on branches," said the boy.
"My trunk is gone," said the tree. "You cannot climb."
"I am too tired to climb," said the boy.
"I am sorry," sighed the tree. "I wish that I could give you something... but I have nothing left. I am an old stump. I am sorry..."
"I don't need very much now," said the boy, "just a quiet pleace to sit and rest. I am very tired."
"Well," said the tree, straightening herself up as much as she could, "Well, an old stump is a good for sitting and resting. Come, Boy, sit down. Sit down and rest."
And the boy did. And the tree was happy."
Shel Silverstein - The Giving Tree, 1964.

23/09/2024

An elderly man rear-ended a guy driving an expensive European sports car. Enraged, the guy hops out and confronts the old man. He yells,
"Look what you did to my car! You're going to give me $10,000 right now or I'm going to beat you to a pulp!"
"Oh my…" the old man said nervously. "I don't have that kind of money. Let me call my son.” he said with hope. “He trains dolphins and he will know what to do."
"Dolphins!" the other driver huffed, while rolling his eyes.
The old man pulled out his phone, dialed his son, and just as his son answered, the irate man snatched the phone away from the old man.
"So, YOU'RE a dolphin trainer, huh?” The irate man yelled, “Well, your old man here just rear-ended my car and I need TEN GRAND right now, or I'm going to beat you AND your old man to a pulp!"
"I'll be there in 10 minutes." says the voice calmly on the other end.
Exactly 10 minutes later, a Jeep pulls up and a guy hops out and proceeds to pulverize the bully, leaving him in a heap on the side of the road. When he finished, he walked over to his father and said,
"For the last time dad, I train Seals… Navy Seals. NOT dolphins!”

23/09/2024

All it needs is a cowboy hat and a revolver 🤣
Like a boss 🦅
PhotoCredits: Thomas Jarrold ()

23/09/2024

A strange old lady has moved into my house 😁
I have no idea who she is, where she came from, or how she got in. I certainly did not invite her. All I know is that one day she wasn't there, and the next day she was.
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She is a clever old lady and manages to keep out of sight for the most part, but whenever I pass a mirror, I catch a glimpse of her. And, whenever I look in the mirror to check my appearance, there she is hogging the whole thing, completely obliterating my gorgeous face and body. This is very rude! I have tried screaming at her, but she just screams back.
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The least she could do is offer to pay part of the bills, but no. Every once in a while, I find a $5 bill stuck in a coat pocket or some loose change under a sofa cushion, but it is not nearly enough. And I don't want to jump to conclusions, but I think she is stealing money from me. I go to the ATM and withdraw $50 and a few days later, it's all gone! I certainly don't spend money that fast, so I can only conclude the old lady is pilfering from me. You'd think she would spend some of that money to buy wrinkle cream. And money isn't the only thing I think she is stealing.
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Food seems to disappear at an alarming rate-especially the good stuff like ice cream, chips, and sweets. She must have a real sweet tooth, but she'd better watch because she is really packing on the pounds. I suspect she realizes this, and to make herself feel better, she is tampering with my scale to make me think I am putting on weight, too.
✨
For an old lady, she is quite childish. She likes to play nasty games, like going into my wardrobes when I'm not home and altering my clothes so they don't fit. And she messes with my files and papers so I can't find anything. This is particularly annoying since I am extremely neat and organized.
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She has found other imaginative ways to annoy me. She gets into my mail, newspapers, and magazines before I do and blurs the print so I can't read it. And she has done something really sinister to the volume controls on my TV, radio, and telephone. Now, all I hear are mumbles and whispers. She has done other things-like make my stairs steeper, my vacuum heavier and all the k**b and taps harder to turn. She even made my bed higher so that getting into and out of it is a real challenge.
✨
Lately, she has been fooling with my groceries before I put them away, applying glue to the lids, making it almost impossible for me to open the jars. She has taken the fun out of shopping for clothes. When I try something on, she stands in front of the dressing room mirror and monopolizes it. She looks totally ridiculous in some of those outfits, plus, she keeps me from seeing how great they look on me.
✨
Just when I thought she couldn't get any meaner, she proved me wrong. She came along when I went to get my picture taken for my driver's license, and just as the camera shutter clicked, she jumped in front of me
I hope she never finds out where you live!

23/09/2024

A hillbilly went hunting one day in West Virginia and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his pickup truck and was about to drive home where he was confronted by an ornery game warden who didn't like hillbillies. The game warden ordered to the hillbilly to show his hunting license, and the hillbilly pulled out a valid West Virginia hunting license. The game warden looked at the license, then reachd over and picked up one of the ducks, sniffed it's butt, and said, "This duck ain't from West Virginia. This is a Kentucky duck. You got a Kentucky hunting license, boy?" The hillbilly reached into his wallet and produced a Kentucky hunting lcense.
The game warden looked at it, then reached over and grabbed the second duck, sniffed it's butt, and said, "This ain't no Kentucky duck. This duck's from Tennessee. You got an Tennessee licence?" The hillbilly reached into his wallet and produced an Tennessee license. The warden then reached over and picked up the third duck. "This duck's from Virginia. You got a Virginia hunting license?"
Again the hillbilly reached into his wallet and brought out a Virginia hunting license. The game warden was extremely frustrated at this point, and he yelled at the hillbilly, "Just where the hell are you from?"
The hillbilly turned around, bent over, dropped his pants, and said, "You tell me, you're the expert!" 😂

22/09/2024

Have a great day :)

All Things Wonderful and Weird

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