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13/12/2024

Good morning fams

05/12/2024

JOKE OF THE DAY: A man was swiping through a dating app when he matched with someone who didn't have a profile picture. Desperate for a change, he decided to take a chance and meet her.

He wasn't expecting much, maybe someone a little rough around the edges, but when he arrived, he was floored. She was stunning: 5'2", baby blue eyes, strawberry blonde hair, and all the right curves.

Impressed, he asked what she did for a living. "I teach Sunday school," she said.

He'd never dated a Christian girl before, so he was intrigued. On the drive to dinner, he lit a cigarette and asked if she cared for one.

"Oh, heavens no!" she replied, "What would I tell my Sunday school children?"

Fair enough, the man thought. Some people smoke, some don't.

At the restaurant, he ordered a steak and requested the second-most expensive bottle of wine on the menu. When the wine arrived, she declined a glass.

"You don't drink?" the man asked, surprised.

She shook her head. "Oh, heavens no! What would I tell my Sunday school children?"

The dinner and conversation were amazing, but the man couldn't quite figure her out. On the drive home, he passed a cheap motel and figured, why not take a chance?

"Want to get a room and fool around?" the man asked nervously.

She winked and said, "I thought you'd never ask!"

Surprised, the man laughed and teased, "Really? What are you going to tell your Sunday school children about this?"

She grinned mischievously and answered,.......... Continue Reading in below comment ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

Wa Embu On Line

Don't forget to like, comment and follow page pls... These are the least you can do for me Abeg 🙏😭😭🙏

05/12/2024

Breaking News 🚨🚨

A 31 year old mother shed tears on CNN after hearing that his 10 year old son she changed to a girl won’t be receiving any help or medicines from the Government as Trump plans to end Gender Affirming care .

Trump is set to pass a law that prohibits changing the s*x of a child and teaching them that they can be a woman in a man’s body . America spends millions on these people as they constantly need medicines every time .

My worry is , Why will a parent do that to his or her child ?
Well , this is about to end now as Trump said .

Moral lesson : I pitied the kids .

05/12/2024

MY HUSBAND WAS MOCKING MY UNDERWEAR IN A GROUP CHAT WITH HIS FRIENDS – HE SOON REGRETTED IT

So, Tom and I were pinching pennies like crazy lately because he’s all about getting this fancy sports car. I've been putting off buying anything nice for myself, even just some new makeup or underwear.

Two days ago, I was cleaning up and moved Tom's phone to charge it. Right then, it lit up, and I saw this photo pop up. It was from my own underwear drawer! I peeked into his group chat and saw he sent this photo to his buddies, saying he "doesn't remember marrying a granny." They were all having a laugh about it. My heart just DROPPED. I felt so embarrassed and betrayed!

The next morning, I met up with Joyce, Tom's mom, for brunch. I tried to act normal, but Joyce saw right through me. I ended up spilling everything. But instead of being as shocked as I was, she just had this mischievous glint in her eye. She leaned over and said, "Leave it to me, dear. I know exactly what to do."

So, imagine: that evening, Tom walks in, and his jaw just DROPS as he sees ⬇️

05/12/2024

I was on my period the day I was r***d.
My stepsister and I were on our way to the night vigil that night, we were not going directly to the church, we were going to meet Sarah, my stepsisters' friend so that we would go to the church together.
My step mother was a Muslim, but dad was a Christian before he died and he made sure that we, his children converted to Christians.
So my step mom doesn't go to church with us, but she usually gave us transportation fare to church.
But my step sister and I would not use the money for transport, we spent the money on snacks.

I did not even hear the steps of the guys coming, they must have tiptoed.
We entered a corner, for shortcut and the three men came, one covered my mouth and the second one supported him to carry me to a nook.
My stepsister ran away.

I begged and begged the men to not do that to me, but they didn't even listened to me.
I told them I was menstruating, they didn't listened.

The three of them took turns to r**e me. Two holding me down while one doing it.
The third one was still on me, and I was trying to break free even though I was extremely weak.

My hand got hold of a stick on the floor and I stabbed his eye with it. He fell down, in pains as blood were coming out, then a hunter flashed his light towards us.
He started whistling immediately he saw what they were doing to me.
The guys ran away before the other hunters came.
The hunter told me not to worry that he recognized one of them.

Two days later, they were caught and my stepmother got them arrested.
It was when they were totured that they later confessed that my stepsister was the one who sent them to r**e me so as to check if I was truly a virgin or not.

The End

Credit:Unknown
Follow my Page Marvelous Mion for more interesting story like this

01/12/2024

🤣 MARVELOUS 🤣 MION🤣 JOKE 🤣
1..the benefits of marrying short girl is dat u can put your phone on top of the cupboard without password 😂😂😂

2..u dey inside bus🚍
And the driver begin dey scràtçh Em hand for head dey spead up dey say.. "This world don tïrê me"!!
🙆‍♂️u get time dey reply am with.. " As in eehn😏😂😂

3..after eating your BREAD alone in the bus 😏
U are turning to ask.. "What's the time??
😡it is 48:76pm.. nøñsense 🥺🥺

4.. Men beware!!
Never Dåte a lady with a screen craçked phone..
😏if she can bréak her own phone and fēel normal, what about your hëart?? 🙆‍♂️🙆‍♂️😂😂

5..on my wedding day, if u cannot explain how water enter inside coconut🥥..
No food for you 😂😂

6.. Boldness is when you enter a football viewing centre, switçh øff the tv and Shøut.. "I want to preach the word of God😂😂

7..AMERICAN: "OH, he's gone!! 🥺
AFRICAN: "when I saw him licking oranges and groundnuts yesterday.. I didn't know he was saying goodbye🙁🙁 😂😂

8.. U will stand one place and drink 2 sachets water, or when you buy bottle water, u will carry it from the market to my house.. Why?? 🙆‍♂️😂😂

9..thats how some pastors will quote a verse in the Bible.. Baaam, u will search the whole Bible but couldn't find it 🙆‍♂️😂😂

10..Everything is not Village people, how will u go for job interview and be f!ghting over sockets to charge your phone?? 🙆‍♂️😂😂

11..we can't find our secondary school friends on Facebook again, because .."Joseph blessing" Is now.. "La candy La crūsh" 😂😂

12.. to view the complete joke and funny story pls click and follow or like 👉 Marvelous MionMarvelous MionMarvelous Mion

01/12/2024

"When I first met Chris Brown, I told him that I'm from Atlanta. I'm not really from Nigerian cuz I wasn't born there." Davido

"I do afrobeats but if you listen to me, you'll realize that I don't have the Nigerian accent. I speak and sing like an American, you know what am sayin'. When Chris Brown and his friends first heard my songs, they were like: 'Are you sure you're an African bro?' And I said nah! I'm from Atlanta. My accent is so soothing and demure." Davido

01/12/2024

“I was on my síck bed in Abuja I almost lost my lífe. Only to wake up and see that Wizkid posted Declan Rice. It was the beginning of something new for me and my family. I have never been the one to b¡te the hand that feeds me and I will never be that person” Odumodu Blvck

Moral lesson: Never bite the hand that once fed you.

01/12/2024

Between Wizkid and Davido, who rocked the $840K Croc rain boot better 👀⁉️

Imagine spending $840K (1,410,989,487.60 - Naira) on a rain boot🥶

゚

01/12/2024

"The day I was cooking and Drake stôpped by to eat, he entered the kitchen and it was only the 2 of us but nothîng happened. Drake is like a brother to me, sometimes we slęep on the same będ and nothing happens." Tem

"Alot of people found it fascinating that I was in the kitchen cooking for Drake and his team but I was actually cooking for him. I was just cooking for my people and Drake came by and said that he must eat my food. It wasn't even at Drake's house, it was at my own house. I cooked Chicken and Rice the Nîgerian way and Drake really lovęd it. It's a lot of work to cook it but I did it for my brother, Drake and my people. I know many people can't believe that a Savãge Drake spend time with a gîrl without smashîng her. But I tell you that Drake and I can even slęep on the same będ and nothing will happen." Tems

Drake Ate TEMS' FOOD and Not TEMS FOOD🤐

Na bloggers talk😂☺️

01/12/2024

The reality of the current world 💔

01/12/2024

History 🚨‼️

Wizkid's “Morayo” album breaks the record for an African album with the BIGGEST Opening week streams on Spotify.

Morayo has surpassed 48M streams in 6 Days breaking Tyla’s record of 46.4M streams.

01/12/2024

Breaking News!

South Africans cry as Wizkid's Morayo breaks South African Grammy winner Tyla's record for the most first week streams for an African album on Spotify with 48 million streams in 6 days.

It has surpassed Tyla's previous record of 46.4 million Spotify streams.

Wizkid’s Morayo holds the record for the biggest first week streams globally for an African album on Spotify.

Omoh, Popsy was not joking when he said he came to break records oh chaii😂
Don't forget to like and comment ooo ☺️

30/11/2024

She wan collect pass God

30/11/2024

How celebrities look if pregnant 🤭😂

30/11/2024

I just feel like dropping this here

30/11/2024

One word for this Werey 🤣😂
👇👇👇

30/11/2024

All m€n bløcked. Lad!es let’s discuss why u cheating on h!m, they won’t see your replies😁

The replies are too heartbreaking 💔😭
A thread👇

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