11/16/2025
AIO? Was I rude in my texts? Why is my friend acting "off" with me?
u/Substantial-Wash-700 says,
Do you ever have a friend who thinks you're mad at them (you're not) and so they start acting off with you?
My friend does this often. I'm going through it again and it's very similar to this situation.
On Saturday, my friend had a BBQ at a park for a local activist group she recently started. I signed up to bring 30 hotdogs for the BBQ weeks ago.
First screenshot is Wednesday, second screenshot is Thursday and Friday.
Now bless my friends heart, but she was super stressed about this meeting and I heard she was up prepping late the night before and things went wrong with the meals she ordered. (I was out of town until Friday and she had several other friends helping her so please no, "you didn't help her enough" claims.) So I know stress is compounding a lot of this. But I get to this BBQ and my friend is acting off with me from the get go. Not rude, but different. Not as chatty or as much eye contact she would have with me as usual.
Knowing how my friend's mind works, I know she thinks I was acting off first and the only thing I think she can pin that on is maybe my "I'll get the hotdogs and buns" text that maybe came off dry? But I would think she'd notice I'm at the BBQ supporting her and excited to see her after being out of town for the past week. It's like my friend from the get-go assumes I'm mad with her and starts acting off so it puts me on the offensive.
Anyway, it's Tuesday and my friend is still acting like this. Again not rude, still polite, but different enough it makes me notice. It actually low-key soured the Halloween party we also went to that Saturday night that I was so excited for too. :/