Andrews, N.C.

25/11/2023

Get local help with technology: personal training, support, and set-up.

11/11/2023

Looking for something fun to do TONIGHT? There’s a free flash dance (a one-time-only modern-music contra) at the John C. Campbell Folk School from 7-9 p.m. All dances taught, and there are always people available to dance with. Come have fun!

17/06/2023

There are a bevy of dances in Brasstown, NC, this week. Come join in!

• Saturday, June 17, 7-9 p.m. Keith House, 1 State Rd 1565
• Monday, June 19, 4-6 p.m. Keith House, 1 State Rd 1565
• Tuesday, June 20, 7-9 p.m. Open House, 1 State Rd 1565
• Wednesday, June 21, 7-9 p.m. Keith House, 1 State Rd 1565
• Thursday, June 22, 7-9 p.m. The Crown Restaurant
• Friday, June 23, 4-6 p.m. Keith House, 1 State Rd 1565

Folk School dances suggest a $5-10 donation, per adult.

09/05/2023

You’re so Cherokee County if…

• You don’t believe round pegs fit in square holes.
• You haven’t been able to eavesdrop on your neighbors since the crypto mine opened next door.
• You refer to the police department as “Murphy’s law.”
• You submit selfies to the Arts Guild’s downtown art contest.
• You still check local dumpsters for FBI most-wanted criminals.
• You thought a “social district” was a group on Facebook.
• You’ve stopped tourists from entering Shoebooties to buy footwear.
• You still call Erlanger Western Carolina Hospital by its “true” name.
• Your favorite Christmas song is “Run, run, Rudolph.”
• You know Big Frank.
• You prefer going to another state to buy gas.
• Your idea of fun is launching pumpkins 300 feet into the air with a giant trebuchet.
• You have to remind people the state doesn’t end at Asheville.
• You stash money under your mattress in case you ever need to call 911.
• You see a sign that says “Hanging Dog” and don’t call the SPCA.
• You have friends in high places. Well, high-elevation places.
• You make reservations for the DMV but not for Valentine’s Day.
• Your school used to literally be a prison.
• You go to the Henn to watch “chick” flicks.
• You miss the Possum Drop. And Miss Possum Drop.
• Your favorite restaurant smuggles its chicken sandwiches from across the Georgia border.
• Your child’s school confiscates more e-cigarettes than it does cell phones.
• You go out of your way when you’re at the beach just so you can say you drove Murphy-to-Manteo.
• You know who Abraham Lincoln’s real dad is.
• You think the waterways should be controlled by the “NCVA.”
• You’re still waiting to learn why The Learning Center closed.
• You tell your mother you spend all your free time “at the parson’s,” and you mean it.
• Going to church is a family reunion.
• Your idea of an “Appalachian Driving Experience” is navigating your driveway.
• Every time you cross into Clay County or Graham County, you think, “This used to be ours.”
• Directing tourists to the Wherehouse becomes an Abbott & Costello routine.
• Your local SWAT team is not subject to the U.S. Constitution.
• You tell people that Murphy USA gas stations are named after your hometown.
• Tourists ask you where they can hike the Mount Alban they heard about.
• There’s a Bible verse on your company sign.
• You get excited when you visit another Cherokee County.
• You always thought “roundabout” was a manner of speaking.
• You consider yourself inclusive because you voted for Madison Cawthorn.
• You can pronounce any of the following: Konehete, Qualla, Unaka, Wehutty.
• The only time you wore a mask was during Halloween.
• You’ve eaten at 20 different restaurants next to the hospital, all in the same building.
• You chose your college because it has a Chick-Fil-A on campus.
• You rave about The Crown but don’t understand its menu.
• Horror movies have nothing on the roadkill you’ve seen.
• Your Sundays consist of going to church, the casino, then back to church.
• You call going to an ATM “a trip to the outer banks.”
• You live next to the world’s biggest ten commandments but steal your neighbor’s wi-fi.
• You wonder whether inflation is helping West Tubing Company.
• You changed your address from Hanging Dog to Murphy when you joined PETA.
• You buy your kids’ school clothes at thrift stores but tell your commissioners to send a $50 million grant back to the state.
• You can’t decide which river to go white-water rafting on.
• Your favorite part of driving into Tennessee is the higher speed limit.
• You stop by the local realtor to sit at your old coffee counter.
• You get urgent care in a log cabin.
• You’ve considered opening a bed and breakfast called “Murphy beds.”
• You thought banning critical race theory would slow down the track team.
• You’ve been considered for the job of Andrews police chief.
• Your town’s entire police force has been suspended.
• You bragged that Mark Meadows was your representative until Congress held him in criminal contempt.
• The only streaming platform you like is the one you fish from.
• You’ve thought a restaurant should open next to the hospital lab called “The Peachtree Dish.”
• You brag about having the largest ten commandments in the world, then immediately check the Guinness book of records to make sure you’re not lying.
• You get your politics from Cherokee Guns billboards.
• You have to explain to tourists that Brasstown Valley Resort is not in Brasstown.
• Your shed has a shed.
• You remember Doyle’s Cedar Hill, Parker’s Drug Store, Hillbilly Mall, District Memorial Hospital, Piggly Wiggly, and The Sirloin.
• When your boss sent you to the store to buy Posted notes, you came back with a stack of “No trespassing” signs.
• You shrug when you hear North Carolina’s under a hurricane warning.
• Relatives think your child is cursing every time he tells them the name of his school.
• Your vet offers punch cards for spaying and neutering. Tenth one’s free.
• You use your $60,000 SUV as a pickup truck.
• You love hearing the racetrack from your house but complain about the noise from the crypto farms.
• You want the trains to come back but never rode them while they were here.
• Your family photo was taken in a field of flowers… next to Hwy. 64.
• You think IOI is when you owe yourself money.
• You like going to Monte Alban because it reminds you of Fantasy Island.
• Your favorite billboard is a semi-trailer in a field beside the highway.
• You call your local newspaper publisher “Murphy Brown.”
• You thought Snap-On produced fruity beverages.
• Your nightmares involve school consolidation.
• You tell friends you know someone on the board of NASA.
• You thought kudzu was North Carolina’s state flower.
• You complain when the power goes out but don’t want the TVA to build new transmission lines.
• You can drive to five other state capitals faster than you can to your own.
• You ate farm-to-table before it was cool.
• You live in the most beautiful place on earth.

30/03/2023

Sign up for a 5K through downtown Hayesville to benefit Carolina Christian Academy:

Building leaders who follow Christ is the mission of CCA. We know we've met our goal when we see our students professing their faith freely and following God's leading even when it's hard. 

21/09/2022

How crypto ruined Cherokee County:

Cryptocurrency mining brought constant noise to this remote part of Appalachia

26/08/2022

BREAKING: FORT BRAGG MOLD-INFESTED: https://brevitypost.com/

24/08/2022

BREAKING: BIDEN ORDERS MIDEAST AIRSTRIKES: https://brevitypost.com/

23/08/2022

US: LEAVE UKRAINE NOW // PLUS MORE BREAKING HEADLINES: https://brevitypost.com/

22/08/2022

RUSSIA BLAMES UKRAINE FOR BOMB and more top breaking news headlines: https://brevitypost.com/

20/02/2022

A London mortician took his hearse to the mechanic for the fifth time in two weeks to get its blinkers repaired.

“You’ve got to get this fixed!” he demanded. “I lead funeral processions, and when my blinkers are broken, families drive to the wrong cemetery.”

An hour later, just as the mechanic finished, the mortician got an emergency call and explained he had to rush to pick up a stiff in the nearby town of Watford.

He took the hearse and picked up the body, but on his way to the funeral home, his turn signals went out again. He turned the k**b up, then down, then back and forth. Eventually he pulled over, got out, and changed the bulbs himself to no avail. Exasperated, he drove directly back to the mechanic.

“I’m done,” he told the repairman. “I’ve tried everything I can think of but nothing works!”

The mechanic took one look in the back of the vehicle and replied, “You can load a hearse in Watford, but you can’t make it blink.”

09/01/2022

Remember those classic Burma-Shave signs? What if they were updated for the pandemic era?

Remember those classic Burma-Shave signs? What if they were updated for the pandemic era? It’s like a pillowfor your face;and catches particles in case –Burma-Mask. The lassie saidshe’d pledge her …