26/12/2022
I was so caught off guard.
I didn't even know how to respond.
My husband would talk to people, family, friends-, they'd ask, "how's elle, how's the baby?" People would text me," how are you, how's the baby?" Check-ins would be, "how's the baby?" Naturally the conversation was turned 100% on baby updates, pictures, etc.
The first time I was asked, "how are you doing?" (Period, no other statements followed) I was literally speechless. No one had asked that before. I didn't know how to answer. Because truth was (and still is) things have been hard.
A mom in those first 12 weeks has very little sleep, routine is not a thing, feeding yourself is a chore, did I even brush my teeth?
Then add a colicky baby. One who cried for 5+ hours at a time.
It's hard. Really hard.
And the postpartum period doesn't only effect the mom- it effects the dad too. We hold dad's to such unrealistic expectations during this time as well! It takes a team, a village right?
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This has by far been the most difficult postpartum period - it's amazing how people (who claim to be close to you) can be so quick to be unaware of what life might be like for you. They take advantage of their access to you at your lowest place. It's hard.
So next time you talk to a new mom, please ask how she is doing? Period. The end. Baby will be fine. Listen to her. Look for ways to SuPPOrT the family -- not tear them down. If there's ever a time to be overly positive, this is probably it.
It's not the time to push your own agenda.
Thank you for being that person for me. I'll never forget you actually asking how I'm doing. 💕
9 weeks in, and finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel and not letting anyone steal our families peace.
Word of the year 2023: ✌️ 🕊️ peace.
