Jago the joker (2024)

04/04/2023

A beer company was hiring a taster, Someone to taste the beers before they are taken for selling. So they placed adverts and one afternoon, my father walked into the manager's office asking to be employed.

The manager tried to figure out how he could drive him away but couldn't come up with an idea, so he decided to give him a trial. He ordered his secretary to give him a glass of wine 🍷

He took a sip and said, "It's Red wine, Varietal, three years old, grown on rift valley, matured in steel containers."

"That's correct!" The manager exclaimed, "Well give him another one let's see." So he was given.

He took a sip again and said, "It's Guinness, a combination of barley, roast malt extract, and brewers yeast brewed around Thika road in Nairobi, Kenya 2 years ago"

"Incredible!" said the manager.

Now the manager went closer to the secretary and whispered to her saying, "Go get some of your urine in a cup let's see if he will get that."

So my father was given the cup of urine. He took a sip, turned to the manager and said, "Female urine, 26 years old, 2 weeks pregnant and if I'm not given this job, Sir I will tell your wife who is responsible for the pregnancy"

both the manager and the secretary fainted 😁😳

My father got the job✌
Kudos to real drunkard

04/04/2023

Robbers Enter a House, Asks for all the Money
and Valuables.

After they collect what they can, they give the
man of the house a gun with instructions to
shoot his wife or else he be shot himself.
The man gets the gun, points it at his wife and
hesitates. He is thinking of what he has gone through in life with his wife and how she has suffered and sacrificed for him.

He hands back the gun and says, “I am sorry I
can’t do this…

“The boss of the robbers silently grabs the gun
from him and passes it on to the wife with the
same instruction.

The wife gets the gun and without any single
hesitation points to her husband’s head and pulls the trigger. But at last, the gun had no bullets in it. The robbers get their gun and walk out of the house laughing.

QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION.

1). If you were the man in that house how would you react towards your wife?

2). If you were the wife, what explanation can you give to your husband!

3). If you were invited to bring peace between
this couples, what advice would you give?

04/04/2023

🤣💔🤣MY GIRLFRIEND 🤣💔🤣
™️
𝗜 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗶𝘀 𝗮 𝗽𝗼𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗲𝗿. 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗲𝘀 𝗺𝗲, 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝘆 𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗺𝗲 𝗶𝗻 the 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗺𝘆 𝘄𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝗱𝗮𝘆.

𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗲 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝘆 𝘄𝗶𝗳𝗲 “𝘄𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗶𝗻𝘃𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗴𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝘆𝗲𝘁. 𝗜 𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗽𝗶𝗰𝗸 𝗵𝗶𝗺 𝘂𝗽 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝘄𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗵𝗶𝗺“

𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗺𝘆 𝗶𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗰𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝘀𝗮𝘆: '𝗺𝗮𝗱𝗮𝗺 𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗲𝗿, 𝗚𝗼𝗱 𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝘆 𝗵𝘂𝘀𝗯𝗮𝗻𝗱'𝘀 𝗰𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗜 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗮𝘃𝗮𝗶𝗹𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗵𝗶𝗺''.🤣💔🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂

04/04/2023

BRA! BRA!! BRA!!!🤣😂😂🤣😂🤣👍
Bra wey know maths is called *Algebra*😅😅
Bra under animation is called *Zebra*😅😅
A Muslim bra is called *Ibrahim*😅😅
A Christian bra is called *Abraham*😅😅
Bra wey balance is called *Equilibra*😅😅
Alcoholic bra is called *Brandy*😅😅
Poisonous bra is called *Cobra*😅😅
Hard bra is called *Brass*😅😅
Skinny bra is called *Vertebra*😅😅
National bra is called *Brazil*😅😅
State bra is called *Anambra*😅😅
Academic bra is called *Library*😅😅
Magic bra is called *Abracadabra*😅😅😅🤣😁😁😅

Strong man is called *bravery* 😂😂

Any new thing is called Brandy ❤️😂

Head bra is called *braid* 😂😂

Hugging bra is called *Embrace* 😂😂

Different types of bra is called *branch* 😂😂

Sport bra is called *Ibrahimovic*🤣

Dirty bra is called *brat*

Proud bra is called * brag*

Musical bra is called *bracket*

Motor bra is called *brake*

Cloth bra is called *brazier*

Human bra is called *brain*

Oya give me bravo 👏👏

I sabi book na😂😂😂😂🤣

04/04/2023

Two men dīed same day and become Ghøst.
And this conversation ensued between them

Ghøst 1: *How did you dīe?*

Ghøst 2: *I was mistakenly locked up in a freezer. At first I was freezing and then I couldn't breathe and dīed*.

Ghøst 1: *Oh! What a sād way to dīe*.

Ghøst 2: *Yeah. How did you dīe?*.

Ghost 1: *I dīed of heart attāck. I came back from work and saw a man's pair of shoe at my door steps. I rushed into the room and saw my wife nāked alone on the bed. I searched everywhere including the kitchen, all the other bedrooms, I mean everywhere but I couldn't find the man! I just sat on the floor and suddenly developed a heārt attāck and dīed.*

Ghøst 2: *Did you check inside the refrigerator?*.

Ghost 1: *No*

Ghost 2: *Idīot! You should have checked the refrigerator and both of us would have been alive now*🏃‍♂️🚶‍♂️🚶‍♂️
🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣

04/04/2023

It's sad reality 😥😥😥😥😥

This snake was in a lady's office. where after he when
The snake then the lady cabinet and the snake where the police went on that day bit the snake by the almighty father on that day. The lady the cabinet along with the snake on that day and the police and went to the place and the snake later. Together with them they didn't make it later they came back from there where you are the policeman was there. After the snake. Sad reality.😂🙆🍂

I was unable to read this please somebody should help

04/04/2023

1. Bae swear I love u, Even if they ask me to choose between u or a trip to America, I promise.😒😏
I'll be thinking about you in the plane.😃😂

2. One girl posted "I love my bed, so soft and big." The moment I liked it, she deleted the post. She didn't even allow me to comment self.

Well she's my neighbour and she sleeps on a mat😂😂

3. When ur boss starts saying, "don't call me sir, call me Eric" My sister just find iron pant and wear😂😂😂🤣

4. Guys, do you remember that moment in the exam hall wen you looked at your friend and found him also looking at you😂😂😂

5. Sometimes your boyfriend is over protective because he knows that you're too easy to get. Just one plate of indomie na pant👙 shifted😂😂

6. How to detect a wife material 👉 make a funny post, any lady that comments "Lol Sir" is a wife material. Marry her 😂😂

7. My brother, if her phone rings and she stares at you before picking …
Just know that your assistant is calling😂😂

8. When I say Girls are very beautiful😍 I mean those that hustle for themselves.., not the tax collectors 🚮😒😒🚶

9. Your mates are getting married. You are there shouting all men are players. My sister, it is better you marry a player than end up with a referee.😂😂

10. You're dating a fat girl and you're complaining she's cheating on you.

Uncle, can you finish a full cow?😂😂

11. Who among you watch this film 那些个字头上的啊有
weytin pain me pass for the film na weytin CHI HONG talk last 我就在哪个性爱🤣😁💔

12. Stop running after people. If they forget you, forget them too. You didn't come on earth to be someone's memory card. Love yourself.💯

13. Stop ignoring my post am not your Ex 😂 I did nothing wrong to you 🙄🚶

04/04/2023

Time to Laugh 😂🤣🤣😅😅🤪

1. I no dey hear waiting you dey talk,Just dress your hand go down small make I see that number 3😂🤪

2. Went to donate blood for Money today, as I donate two pints, I was admitted and given back three pints 😹😿😿😅

3. My EX thought he broke my heart . Mtcheew heart wey I don put screen guard 💔😛🤪😹😹

4. Everywhere is boring make we do another election so that them go rig am make we begin shout 🤠🤣🤣🤪🤪🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏾‍♀️

5. Do rats see other rats 🐀 deád and be like: No, no not Aisha … I was with her in the bàg of rice just now 😏🤦🤧

6. Keep buying fried rice and Chicken 🍗 for ur babes while ur boxers look like Sm1 dat escape bomb blast😫🤐🤐😛🤪

7. Toheeb I noticed say when you dey do ablution the water wey you suppose use rinnse your mouth, you no dey pour am.out. Hope say you no dey drink water lowkey???😅🤣🤣😜

8. Imagine you acr dead during a bokoharam attack and you hear. "Shoot everyone again" that moment even your urine alone can flood Nigeria 😅🤣🤣😹😂😂

9. The most embarrassing moment is when you are seated beside your crush in church acting like a big boy then your younger brother comes running with 25 frs saying ‘Bro mummy says this is your offering.🤣🤣🤣

10. The Devil is such a hard worker. Once you say no more fornication, one babe will just text you...
"you dey house"?
And to lie again say you no deh house, Na still sin.🤔 🤔 🤣🤣🤣

11. You say a relationship heartbreak is the most painful feeling? My friend, I guess your teacher never separated you from the person you had planned to copy answers from in an exam.😹😹😂😂😂😂😹😹😹😹😹😹

12. HAPPY NEW MONTH LOVERS💛🥂🥳🎊

Hey Cutie🥰 I can see you Smiling and scrolling please🙏😥😥 tap my profile below👇 to get for more funny posts.
Pleeeeeeaaaase😥😥😥🙏🙏 Do not ignore me this new month. GOD BLESS YOU🙏🙏🙏

30/03/2023

😂TRUE STORY ABOUT ME AND MY GF❤
Jago😁 and his Girlfriend🤵‍♀️ were taking a romantic❤ walk down the beach one cold night.
Shady grabbed the girl's hands, drew her closer to himself, kissed her and said, "Baby, you know I love you so much. There's no one here. Its just the two of us, let's do 'WEWEECHU😋'." The girl looked around and said, "My love, I don't want to do 'WEWEECHU😋' please. Let's just hold hands and cuddle." Shady agreed. After a while, Shady asked her again, "Oh baby, my love, please Let's do 'WEWEECHU'!😋❤" The girl replied, "Baby, don't rush me. I don't want to do it. I just want to be wrapped in your arms." shady calmed down.After a long while, shady couldn't hold it any longer. He said, "My heartbeat, it's not fair oh! Let's do 'WEWEECHU😋😋' na! We haven't done it since last year oh! Let's do it now now." The girl reluctantly agreed. Jago immediately grabbed her closer to himself, hugged her tightly😫, brought out the guitar strapped to his back and they both start singing, "WEWEECHU😂 A MERRY CHRISTMAS🥳! WEWEECHU😂 A MERRY CHRISTMAS🥳! WEWEECHU😂 A MERRY CHRISTMAS🥳! AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR🤩🥸!"Got you didn't I?! D!rty minds😂! What were you thinking 'WEWEECHU🤣 was?🥺
🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

30/03/2023

RELAX AND LAUGH🤣

1" My application to work for NEPA has been approved I pity my ex,cuz first thing tomorrow morning am removing their street transformer😂🤣

2" Abeg Who still remember this song ?
This is super story....
Alafenstrafensoro 😂😂
🏃

3" Men no longer toast girls dis days, they just start calling U names like swty, hun, bae & angel until u finally get close to them.🙆😂

4" I just want to remain a virgin so that when my kids grow up, they will be proud of me.🤔

5" In Naija, you can graduate and stay unemployed until you forget the course you studied.🙆🙆🤣

6" Nowadays before U tell me ur problems, come with paper & pen, let me list mine so that we can pray together.😁😂

7" Awkward moment wen U visit ur rich uncle & U are served 2slices of bread, an egg & a little cup of tea& D kids be like "can U finish it?🙄😂

8" My mum was the first to perform a successful brain surgery in Nigeria with only one hot slap, the brain got set by itself.😂🤣🤣

9" My neighbor broke up wt his girlfriend in a restaurant & she started crying,everyone thought he proposed, so they started clapping👏🤣

10" God please oo bless our hustle oo make our mama no follow campaign bus go Lokoja because of 1k.🤣🤣

12" Stop asking me what I do 4 a living. Do u think living in Nigeria is a small job?
I live in Nigeria 4 a living
😛😷🥴

13" May you never be in a condition where people will say "how i wish i could help" 😭😭

14" Benefit boys organized a dancing competition in sch. Economic teacher took 1st & wz given 10k while principal wz last.Lifenobalance🤣

15" *girls who laugh anyhow on a first date don’t have money for transport*😂😂😂

16" My job is to eat rice and chicken at weddings,
whether the bride loves the groom or not. It's none of my business
😂😂

17" Benefit boys come school late, principal flog time keeper say na him ring bell early.🤣😂

18" What is Disappointment???
Disappointment Is When Your Girlfriend Is Twerking & Nothing Is Shaking 🤦🏻‍♂️🙆🏻‍♂️🙄😝😜🥺

Jago the joker

04/04/2023

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30/03/2023

30/03/2023

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