𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗡𝗼𝗶𝘀𝘆 𝗣𝗲𝗻

02/08/2024

As a fresh grad adult playing the 20s' game circle (┬┬﹏┬┬)

21/06/2024

𝘞𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘮 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘶𝘭𝘭, 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘰𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴.

21/03/2024

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒄𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒆𝒇𝒍𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝒎𝒚 𝒔𝒐𝒖𝒍...

Happy ✨

21/08/2023

at that moment, I knew, there is hope.

01/08/2023

𝑴𝒚 𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝑨𝒖𝒈𝒖𝒔𝒕,

May each second of your days be filled with joy, hope, and the fondest of memories. Life above all.

✨

31/07/2023

Whatever it is that you are trying to accomplish, know this!!

Movie: A Man Called Otto (2022)

✨

31/07/2023

𝘚𝘦𝘪𝘻𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺!

✨

04/07/2023

𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚎𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚎 𝚘𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎.

✨

05/06/2023

And just like that, we're down to our next, last year as students🤞

Indeed, it was a well-spent school year. I was opened to a lot of opportunities, overwhelming experiences, and worth-knowing stories of people coming from different walks of life.

𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬:

1. It's very important to have a strong support system. Surround yourself with people who empower and encourage you to pursue your limits while still keeping you grounded all the time.

2. The "Let Them" Theory. If you asked your friends or anyone else for something or to go somewhere with you and they suddenly changed their mind, let them. Don't force people to attend to your own needs and expectations (kimmy nakita ko lang sa reels kaya in-include ko HAHA pero very relatable and truu naman).

3. Do not stick to one circle. Spending months in college has immersed me in the wonders of our diversity and versatility. Everyone has a different story to tell and dreams to aspire to, which are all worth knowing and would even empower you in many good ways.

4. The world is a big stage. Grab the opportunity to live every moment and be happy. You're allowed to fear things, but don't allow fear itself to win over you. I'm still in the process, but with some help from my people, I'm slowly conquering a few of them.

Soon comes the next table-turner moment of our lives, and we're all counting the odds.

✨

08/05/2023

Perhaps it's true when people say that there are seasonal friends.

The friends we had in high school might not be the people with whom we'll celebrate life. Or they could be the best ones who would change us for the better. And perhaps the circles we found in college will remain nothing more than a fragment of our past. In some cases, it could also be the opposite.

We meet people not by mere coincidence but rather by fate. In a way, they're expected to enter our lives. They're the ones who come at the right time. To remind us, for the last time, about life's bitter truths, which we were already quite well aware of a long time ago.

Eventually, time will pass, and everything may or may not change. Perhaps the connections we found yesterday will last only until tomorrow. Some friendships might end in doubt, betrayal, or in silence alone. And some friendships come unexpectedly and are probably the best of their kind.

Nonetheless, every relationship formed will grow into moments and memories that are worth knowing and having.

✨

02/05/2023

𝑾𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒖𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒐𝒖𝒍, 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒅𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒂 𝒍𝒊𝒆.

✨

24/04/2023

12/03/2023

Days before the world said goodbye to 2022, I felt more anxious and pressured about life - my future, my career, and even my ambitions. I couldn’t think of a plan, goals I wanted to achieve, or any life resolutions for the new year. Then came this year. Still, I got nothing sorted out.

Welcoming the first days of 2023, I only had one resolution in mind. But I said to myself, “𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺 𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘢𝘯, 𝘢𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘢𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘢𝘨𝘢 𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘰𝘯. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘴”. From that, I decided to start with the small details of my life. Honestly, wala pa rin akong concrete goals sa buhay, but currently, I’m in the phase of improving my system - something I learned from a book I’m reading today.

In the past months, life has just been a great adventure. And I’m grateful for the small wins and good changes I gained. Gradually, natututunan ko na ring mag let go, mapa bagay man o tao. And finally, naa-adopt ko na into action some of life’s lessons I learned long ago.

Going outside my comfort zone is a decision I don’t regret. Being away from home is an opportunity that made me expand my horizon. Now, I am simply grateful to the people surrounding me who influence me in many good ways.

Life may be unpredictable, but these small wins are the best kinds that are worth celebrating.

I’m already in my 20s, an adult. Pero marami pa rin akong hindi alam sa buhay. And that’s okay. Because one way or another, I’m going to figure it out. Today, I just feel empowered to pursue who I wish to become.

~ That’s all, BYE BYE…

17/02/2023

𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘝𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦
𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘣𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘧𝘦, 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦
𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘛𝘪𝘮𝘦’𝘴 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘦𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘳

𝘞𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭,
𝘞𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘵,
𝘞𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦,
𝘐’𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨,
𝘐’𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵
𝘐’𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦,
𝘐’𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨

𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘪𝘧, 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳’𝘴 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴
𝘐𝘵’𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘧 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘴
𝘈𝘴 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘶𝘱𝘰𝘯 𝘶𝘴
𝘈𝘴 𝘪𝘧 𝘢 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘥𝘺

𝘔𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘝𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘬𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘭𝘶𝘦,
𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘵𝘩,
𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘪𝘳 𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳,
𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦,
𝘙𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘥𝘶𝘦,
𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺,
𝘐𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦
𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵,
𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦,
𝘜𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘴𝘬𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵

𝙏𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙣, 𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙑𝙖𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙚.

23/12/2022

𝙏𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙮

Turning twenty is an upside-down story. You get lost a lot, but you eventually find your way. You’re often going to doubt yourself, your capabilities, your choices, and everything you were once certain of. You’ll get distracted and crushed by countless miserable thoughts. At one point, you will realize that you’re already drowning. You'll lose track of the supposed high points of your year. Most days, you’ll spend time regretting not seizing those past opportunities. Most days, you’ll stare at your reflection in the mirror, silently uttering your what-ifs and what-could-have-been moments. Before you know it, it's too late to reflect on what has already passed you by.

Turning twenty is absolutely something. It’s one of those life chapters that will give you the feels. A year that is lived with perplexing moments, unsure decisions, and wavering actions - yet still lived with genuine happiness. Being twenty surprises you in unexpected ways and in ways you already anticipated. It’s a turning point. One way or another, you’ll figure it all out.

𝘓𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘺𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘺-𝘰𝘯𝘦. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘯…

-The Noisy Pen

19/09/2022

𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐘𝐒: 𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐆𝐎

Most days, I tend to fear the mere thought of having to let go of many things. Things that I’ve been trying to hold for a long time now. I fear that everything might change if I ever let go of them. Because honestly, most of the changes that have happened in my life are the kinds that I wouldn’t be proud of having. Changes that I selfishly wished to be unchanged.

Most days, I hesitate to throw away the things of significant value. Those that serve as stored pictures and printed memories of the rarest yet warmest days I’ve ever had. I hesitate to try new things, grab the opportunities that knock on my door, and roam around unfamiliar places. In a way, I hesitate to know the unknown, and I hesitate to discover a different side of myself.

Most days, I’m afraid to let my heart speak for my mind. I fear that if I allow it to become my voice, I might not contain the words and rage that it has been keeping for a long time while living in silence. As a consequence of the matter, I have lost countless, irreplaceable treasures. And, with pleasure, Time made me see some of the few counted people I hold dearest by my side slowly fade away into thin air.

𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗼, 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝘄, 𝗜 𝗮𝗺 𝗯𝗲𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗿𝘆.

On some days, I choose to be careless. I choose to leave behind some of the treasures I once found, even if they are the rarest of their kind. Slowly, I try to be vocal and loud. I try to be positive. I try to be just out there – allowing a part of myself to experience the 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙄𝙛𝙨, the 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝘾𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝘽𝙚, and the 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝘾𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙃𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝘽𝙚𝙚𝙣. And I’m scared way too much. But that’s okay. Because I know that letting go of the things I used to have, used to do, and of the people I used to be with, would mean opening a new door of endless possibilities, new dreams, and new beginnings. As much as possible, I try to have fun while being afraid about a lot of things. And that may be the best part about the journey of letting go.

- 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗡𝗼𝗶𝘀𝘆 𝗣𝗲𝗻

04/09/2022

Pansamantala, piliin mo ang 'AKO'. Piliin mong sumaya. Piliin mong maging malaya. Piliin mong bumitaw ng panandalian at isigaw ang 'yong pinagdadaanan. Hayaan mong marinig ka ng nakararami. Hayaan mong ikaw ang maging boses ng mga nangangamba't natatakot.

Pansamantala, huwag kang matakot maging mag-isa. Huwag kang mangambang magkamali sa bawat hakbang na iyong tinatahak. Hayaan mong itama ka ng mga nagawa mong pagkakamali. Hayaan mo ang 'yong sarili na makilala ang bawat aspekto ng pagkatao mo.

Marahil ay masyadong maikli ang oras para bigyan mo ang 'yong sarili ng pagkakataong kumawala at magkamali ng paulit-ulit. Ngunit kung hahayaan mo ring lumipas ang bawat pagkakataon, higit ka lamang na magkakamali, matatakot, at muling babalik kung saan ka rin nagsimula.

Kaya pansamantala, pakiusap, piliin mo ngayon ang iyong sarili.

- The Noisy Pen

31/08/2022

Life is a story of chasing our purpose, our passion, and our dreams. This is exactly the reason why we are always able to live another day and endure the pain that life offers us every second. No matter what or where life brings us, we just could not easily give up without trying or putting up a fight. Our dreams, our goals, our hope - these are what makes us go all the way and give the best that we got. We always believe that everything is possible in life, and that at the end of the day, we will be claiming what we seek most. But what if there is only the impossible. What if we’re now only left with the impossible things, impossible choices, or impossible dreams.

When I was but a young kid, I had no idea whether what is possible, nor what is impossible. All I ever cared about was playing, having fun, and crying whenever I was hurt by a small wound that I got from not always listening to the words of the elders. Life was pretty great to me back then. I was probably careless and self-centered. But alongside that character of mine were the dreams that stayed with me for quite a long time. In fact, I still do remember sticking to that dream of becoming a nurse when I grow up. It actually went on for six or seven years, give and take. But the thing is - when the world starts to show you what real life is and how cruel it can be to you, your dreams as a kid will change, or worse,they could fade. But the worst part? Aside from your dreams, everything around you will also change. YOU, in particular, could change. Because truth be told, I did.

From where I stand right now, and from what I know about myself so far, some things are just quite impossible to achieve yet. And yes, maybe it’s because I’m still hesitant to dive into risks and take the fall. Maybe I’m giving too many excuses instead of just allowing myself to accept the opportunities that come to me. But you see, this is the very reason why I’m writing this. Because this is the part where everyone should come to realize and learn some truth.

The truth is - nothing in this world is impossible. And if ever there is, none of us could ever tell whether what is possible and what is not. At least not until you’ve reached the end of the game. Nothing is certain at the moment because we still have so many things to fear, things to lose, and so many things to learn. But this doesn’t mean that it’s already impossible. We’re just currently trapped into our own wall of reasons and excuses. And that’s what needs to be changed.

You see, dreaming of something in life is what keeps us alive. We may look at things differently or see every situation negatively, but these are what actually drives us to move forward and do something about our lives. Certain or uncertain, bad or good, possible or impossible, the thing is - as long as we’re not giving up, and as long as we’re on the track, nothing is over yet. Because the moment we started to dream of something, that’s when we began making changes. That’s the moment when we started to see the world in its real colors.

Right now, all I have are my dreams. And maybe I still have those thousands of reasons with me. But I’m not giving up, because as most people would often say and believe - it’s not over until it’s over.

Keep on dreaming and do what you know is right. As cliche as this could seem, but you must never forget to follow your heart, especially when you feel lost at times. And someday, we’ll all know that everything is, actually, worth the while.

Truly,
The Noisy Pen

27/06/2022

Some days, we live for fun and adventure. Some days, we stick to one corner. In that particularly empty and quiet place. Because at times, the presence of silence is everything we need.

Some days, we seek the most for connection. To be with our people, or to find a new friend in a stranger we met across the street. Some days, we would rather choose to be alone. To be in the comfort of our own space, and do the things we have always loved doing. Without fearing neither judgment, nor embarrassment.

Some days, we will be happy. Some days, we will live with regrets. Some days, we will live with both. Perhaps, we can really never know what we will be feeling seconds after this moment passes. And tomorrow, it could all be the same again. Or maybe not.

That's one of the million truths about life. There are days when you will have to enjoy the company of having other people around. But on some days, you just have to embrace the company of yourself.

31/12/2021

To All The Friends I Have Since Then

Life, as we know it, is always full of surprises. It’s full of inevitable challenges, countless failures, infinite choices, and thousands of confusing emotions. But most of all, life, as hard as it could get for any of us, is always surrounded by different people possessing different personalities and values.

Truth be told, among the billions of people existing in this world, it is hard to find someone who shares the same interests as we do. Someone who thinks the same way as we do. Someone who shares the same hopes and dreams as we do. It’s a priceless present that any of us could ever receive. And one could never be so lucky to have such people in their lives.

Friends, as what we call them, are the family that we unknowingly build from nothing. But it is something that we all must continue to work on with effort and patience. It doesn’t require us with any kind of proof. Trust, understanding, an enough amount of care, and a little bit of fun are all that is ever needed. Speaking from experience, becoming friends with people is one of the most challenging things to do. We are sure to experience new things, discover new life lessons, and deal with various personalities everyday. More to that, we will be faced by many issues, which, at some point in our lives, could possibly become one of the ultimate reasons why we begin to draw a line and even put an end to the friendship that we nurtured for as long as we could even remember. However, the gift of friendship is also the best thing that could ever happen to us even on the most ordinary of days. It will give us moments to treasure, memories to keep, things to hold on to at times when we are so down and unmotivated. Being friends with people will make us realize that there is something more to life that even our own family couldn’t show us. Friends - they don’t bring out the version of you that most people think is what you only are. Rather, they allow you to explore more about yourself. They help you bring out for yourself the person whom you never thought you could be. With them, you’re going to meet both the best and worst version of yourself. But don’t worry, because that’s exactly where the fun is. And if you’re lucky enough with your friends, you’ll find yourself not alone even when that fun has come to an end.

Some people might be wondering about the difference that it makes when you have your family as your friends and having your friends as your family. To answer that, I’m actually not certain about what difference it does make, but I do know a thing or more about friends and families. The thing is - while family are the friends with whom we share our life in this world, friends, on the other hand, are the chosen family with whom we share the life we have in our own world. Surely, there are ups and downs on both sides, and one can never be too careful when dealing with all the dramas. But regardless, there are much more greater things about these two that we could count. Things to be grateful for. Things that are, indeed, worth living for.

And so, to all the friends I have since then, I give you this message of love. Life has always been challenging for all of us, and that’s exactly the reason why it’s quite rare to find a friend in someone who has always been fighting his own battle. And so, in light of all these, my ever dearest friend, to you I say thank you.
Fate. Not fate. Whatever it is that brought us together, I thank you for coming into my life. Thank you for giving your time to get to know me. Thank you for choosing to stay despite meeting a part of my worst version. But most of all, thank you for entrusting your life and your story with me. It is true that with everything that has happened to us, we happen to build our own walls to protect us against pain and sadness. But knowing that you shared a part of your life with me, as your friend, that is something I will always cherish.

We may be saying goodbye to another year that gave us all the happiness and sorrow that we could ever feel, but know that with saying goodbye is welcoming another chapter of our story. And with all of my hopes and prayers, may we get to live life to the fullest as we say hello to a new year. Let’s be strong together as we face yet another ride of life. And for always, please remember, my friend, I will be there for you.

Truly,
The Noisy Pen

24/12/2021

Something About Christmas

Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year. It brings people together – friends, families, couples, strangers, and even those who consider each other ‘enemies’ for life. It’s probably one of the few remarkable holidays when love is both felt and seen in every place and in every way. This is probably the reason why Christmas day is warmer than any ordinary day. We just couldn’t hide the feeling of joy whenever we’re with our people. Well, at least that’s how I think it is for me.

People of different lives from all over the world are patiently counting the days before Christmas. Who wouldn’t be? It’s when Jesus Christ, our savior, came to life, started to change the world, corrected our mistakes, and the rest of the story then became our great history.

So, how do people celebrate Christmas day? I HAVE NO IDEA. Crazy me, right? Well, here’s the truth. We all have our own ways of celebrating events, and there’s no difference when it comes to celebrating Christmas. Now you know! This is the kind of question that only you, my dear friend, has the absolute power to answer. It is your story to tell. Then why am I writing this? What’s my point in writing this if I’m the one who just told you that celebrating Christmas is your own story to tell, right?

My answer is simple. It is because I’m about to share with you MY story of celebrating Christmas. You’re excited! I know that. That’s how people are – always anticipating to hear some stories about other people’s lives. Just KIDDING! I don’t care if you’re excited or not. I will still be sharing my story, and I am doing it now.

Like I said, we all have our own unique ways of celebrating Christmas. Most of us are all about families gathering together at a cozy home – in one table, eating and laughing together while reminiscing some of the old good days. Oh, and there are also kids everywhere inside the house – playing together like they’re not strangers to each other. Some people celebrate with their friends who are all away from their respected families. They spend their time by doing their thing – shopping, traveling, going to resorts or beaches, or just simply staying at one’s place and talk about stuffs until they realize that Christmas is already over. Same situation goes for couples as well. Or maybe not. Well, you can’t blame me. I have no idea how to have a ‘COUPLE THING’ because never have I ever been into one. And then there are those people who prefers to be alone during Christmas. Well, yes, they’re alone, but clearly, I don’t mean that they’re lonely. They have a family, and they have friends. But probably, they just simply prefer their own company. Believe me, it’s one of the courageous things that we can do for ourselves. The only problem is that we lack courage itself.

So now, in which of these groups do I belong? Well, I actually belong to all of them minus the couple thing. So, I guess that makes it three of these groups.

I often celebrate Christmas with my family. Then there were times when some friends would usually call me to come over to their house and celebrate with them. Well, who am I to turn down those invites, right? I bet that’s how it is with you, too. And I won’t deny that there came the time when I was with my family, but I chose to be alone – staying in my room and enjoying doing my own thing, while others out there are counting the time left before Christmas.

The thing is that December 25th is more than just Christmas to me. It’s my grandmother’s birthday. She’s one of the few people on my list whom I don’t want to lose. But it just so happens that there are some things in life that we cannot win over all the time. It was last year when the second Christmas without her came. It was the first anniversary. So then, why is it the second Christmas already? You'll find it out as we go on with the story. Now, that’s the time when I chose to be alone in my room and minded my own company.

As I lay down on the floor, I came to remember just how good the old days are. I remember my grandmother’s house where we used to live and happen to grow as years went by. I remember playing with my cousins whom I have just met again after a long time. And of course, I remember hanging our socks, hoping that ‘SANTA’ would fill them. Well, I already knew at the time that it’s just our parents who would do the ‘filling’ job. The highlight of my reminiscing lies on the part where I remember seeing my grandmother walking strong, talking brightly, and just simply living a good life. For over a decade of my life, she was always there, helping me to grow until I learn how to walk on my own. She was happy, but I did not take the time to embrace that happiness with her back then.

So, Christmas with my grandmother? Well, she’s always the highlight of the celebration. I’d never doubt that. She is the life of the party for me, and the rest of us probably think of her that way as well. As I have said, Christmas brings most families together, right? Well, that’s how it was for our family. No, it’s not a grand reunion. It’s just a simple gathering of families who each came from a long trip, taking different routes in life. Similar to Christmas itself, my grandmother was the one who always brings us all together. She’s the one who makes each family stop for a while from their never-ending trip. Then when we’re all gathered, she’s the one who makes us move closer together. Then as time passes by, everyone has already forgotten about their trips. That’s when we started to felt the warmth of being together. By then, my grandmother was still there, sitting, looking at us, watching how wonderful her family has become. At the same time, she’s probably thinking how great it would be if only she can walk or talk and dance with her grandchildren even if there’s no music playing at all – just the hands clapping, our loud laughs, and maybe some smooth strum from a guitar.

I bet you already have an idea about my grandmother’s whereabouts right now. Well, I don’t exactly know about your idea, but let’s just say that YOU’RE RIGHT about that. She’s gone. She already left her family, just like that. But let me clear things out. It’s not Christmas when she died. It’s few days before Christmas last, last year. That’s what makes last year’s Christmas the second celebration without her. Now you probably know how very cold it was on that particular Christmas. And how last year had gotten colder. Nevertheless, she remains alive to me, and that’s how it will be for the next five or more decades of my life.

My grandmother was a wonderful person. She’s the most humane person I’ve met so far. Maybe she’s gone, but our memory of her will always be wonderfully warm and bright as the sunrise. I’m always grateful for everything that she had done for me. I loved her, and I still do. Maybe this is the kind of love that will forever remain. Maybe the day will come when I no longer remember any memories I had with her. But here’s the thing, as long as I remember her face and her smile, I’m honestly good with that because she is all I need to remember. Besides, memories never get lost. They’re just somewhere inside our minds, and one day they’ll just come around.

So, how exactly do I celebrate Christmas? Crazy me again, right? It’s like I’ve told you everything about my grandmother and all, but I didn’t exactly tell you how I really celebrate the day.

Well, here’s my truth about celebrating Christmas. My truth is, I HAVE NO IDEA about my own way of celebrating Christmas. So, what’s the difference from my answer earlier? The difference is that this time, I am answering the question for myself, not for the people, not for you. I simply welcome Christmas with family, or with my friends, or with myself. Now that I’ve just said that, I think it's a better fit if I would say that I celebrate Christmas with the people in my life, regardless of how I am related to them. But since there are some changes now that my grandmother’s not around anymore, I’m still figuring it out. Maybe some of us in our family, if not all, are figuring something out, too.

I honestly don’t know how Christmas would turn out for me in the coming years. I haven’t got any clues at all. The only thing that I’m sure of is that Christmas will forever remind me of my grandmother. But that is fine. Why so? Well, because remembering her is, undoubtingly, the best gift that I could ever have. I’m going to miss her – today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, and in the other coming days, most certainly, on Christmas.

So, I guess this is where my Christmas story ends. Well, not the whole story of my life, of course. I still have a lot of unread chapters left in my book. Anyways, since this is where it all ends, I believe somebody has to take the spot. YOU have to take the spot. Don’t worry. People will love your story. And even if they don’t, don’t let that stop you or drown you. It is your story. It’s not theirs. So, WRITE IT OUT!

All these being said and done, I now left this one good question to you, my dear friend. How do you celebrate Christmas day?

Truly,
The Noisy Pen