Many of us have been taught to speak harshly and critically to our bodies as well as ourselves. We’ve had others talk about our shape, the color of our skin, our height, our weight, or how big or small we are as soon as we are born. And often it gets even more intense as we age.
The culture we live in judges people by what they look like on the outside instead of who we are on the inside. Instead of honoring the entirety of us as humans we get picked apart. Such damage to our self esteem can last throughout our whole lives.
This kind of verbal and emotional abuse causes inner pain and suffering and the scars are hard to heal.
That’s why in order to recover, truly recover, from body hatred and anger towards our tummy, breasts, butt, arms legs, face, hair, skin, and the aging process, it is imperative we develop a loving and accepting relationship towards our own selves…body, mind and spirit.
#itsnotaboutfoodpodcast #bodypositivity
#valentines #loveyourbody #itsnotaboutfoodpodcast
Happy Valentines Day!
Love your Body.
Not only today, but every day…
Recovery from any addiction, any disorder, any illness, or any trauma gets much better and lasts much longer when we can have compassion for ourselves and our struggle. Looking at the parts of us that are sick and drive us to distraction are often so painful we often quit and go back into denial. It hurts to look our addictions, disorders, and illnesses right in the face and sometimes we just can't do it right then. This is when compassion, acceptance, and respect for ourselves has to come in.
Eating disorders are a terminal illness. They are disabling, deadly, and costly. The mortality risk for people is over five times higher than for the general population.
Getting help and treatment gives us relief because it will allow us to look at why, how, and what. The reasons someone develops an eating disorder and severe body hatred vary from person to person.
Following our purpose leads us to the path that feeds our soul. We all posses unique gifts and we all have the need to express these gifts. To find our calling is to find the path of our hearts, the way of life that makes us feel alive and glad to be here. Over time we may find many different paths, small and large. We find our calling by listening to our inner voice and doing what feels right and true to ourselves.
Reparenting is the action of taking care of the small child within all of us who have feelings and needs. Many times the pain beneath the struggle with food and weight is linked to emotional needs that weren’t met when we were children. This is understandable since it’s impossible for a parent to meet every emotional need a child experiences. However, as an adult, we can learn to meet our own needs and be our own parent. We do this by being compassionate, loving, attentive, and responsible to ourselves.
Fat thoughts are the kind of thoughts we have when we are criticizing our bodies, calling them too fat, too ugly, too big, or too “whatever”. These thoughts are learned from our cultures fat prejudice and body hatred. Sometimes when we are young and experience shame or uncomfortable feelings, we change them into body hatred. When we begin to understand that our fat thoughts and body hatred are learned, then we can take the blame off our body, and process the deeper feelings in for more constructive and fulfilling ways.
This video is about trust and especially trusting your BODY, MIND AND SOUL to lead you to your path, your life and your self.
Trust is knowing our bodies are living intelligences, giving us immediate feedback about what does and doesn't work for us. When we stop viewing our bodies as something we need to control and manipulate, we can begin seeing them as very wise teachers. When we start to trust our bodies, we can listen and understand what they need.
In this show, I will talk about what is your natural weight, how to get there, how to keep it, and what to do when it changes.
In this video I continue talking about the Mountain and then bring in the Spiral of recovery...
The recovery process is not linear, but rather like a spiral. As we begin our journey of recovery around the spiral, we will meet many layers of life experiences that trigger disorder eating and body hatred behaviors.
Recovery is not a linear process. It requires many layers of learning that unfold uniquely, spontaneously, and independently. In this show I describe 'the mountain of recovery" and all of its stages. I explain "the top of the mountain” which is a very hard place to be, as we have all our feelings and all our behaviors all together. This can feel like we’ll never get through the “most F—ked place.
Laurelee Roark, MA, CCHT
Founder of Beyond Hunger
415-497-8910 cell
It’s Not About Food Podcast
www.laureleeroark.com
www.beyondhunger.org
In this video, I talk about the idea of how to love, nurture, take care of, and accept our whole selves…buddy, mind, and spirit. Especially in a culture which teaches us the exact opposite.
The truth about real and complete recovery from disordered eating and body hatred…hint…its completely doable.
For instance…how do you know if you are or not? What is your definition? And does that change over time?
It's often helpful to make a list of what recovery means to you.
For me recovery was about letting go of the diet mentality, integrating intuitive eating, trusting my body and my whole self to take care of and love the being I am.
This simple way of living without an eating disorder is very different from before I had recovery.
I thought being healthy about food and weight, increasing my self esteem and peace within myself meant I’d be very thin, would be able to eat all the time, never get older or more wrinkly.
I told myself..Then I would be happy”. Big surprise that wasn’t it.
Six Ways to Work With Holiday Eating or “How to get through the holidays without eating everything in sight!”
1. Let go of self-judgement and blame. Develop understanding and compassion for yourself and your over or under-eating.
2. Pay attention to bodily cues of hunger and satisfaction. Eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full and trust your body to tell you what it wants and needs. Stop depriving yourself and give yourself permission to eat.
3. Distinguish for yourself the difference between physical hunger and emotional hunger. Understand how you might be using food to meet your emotional needs.
4. Identify your specific holiday stressers and how they affect you. Allow yourself to feel and express your feelings. Develop alternative ways to nurture yourself without turning to food.
5. Explore how cultural expectations might have prejudiced you against your own body. Work towards developing a more positive, loving relationship with your body.
6. Learn to love and accept yourself unconditionally!
Falling in love with you
This video is about the idea of giving up the idea we need to be “on our case”, “get whipped in to shape” or “time to get serious” about how we are supposed to look, act, be. If that worked it would have worked already. For everyone. But it doesn’t.
What does work is love, acceptance, compassion and understanding. Allow your self to be in your own side no matter what. Be grateful for your body no matter what.
Fall deeply in love with your life, your self, you.
Put down the shame and pick up the knowledge you are perfect inside and out.
All that comes though us is divine because we are divine. A long time ago our bodies were considered to be the image of the divine, yet at some point, we started seeing our bodies as objects to be sculpted into someone else’s idea of perfection. Every ounce of us is divine. When we start to accept this, just as we accept our bodies and our feelings, then we can stop fighting with ourselves and allow ourselves to freely express our own divinity.
#podcast #ItsNotAboutFoodPodcast #divinity #bodypositivity
Feelings and Eating
Overeating and under eating are both ways to cope with overwhelming feelings. They can become a tool to calm down, numb the pain or get away from the feelings. Once we become aware of our overeating or under eating in the moment, we can then look beneath the behaviors at the underlying feelings and explore what might have caused them.
