A COURTIN’ WE WILL GO:
A British woman shared on Instagram the amusing tips she found in a magazine from 1958, in a feature detailing 129 ways to find a husband. Here are some highlights – or rather, lowlights… (How times have changed!)
✓ #17. Be nice to ugly men because handsome is as handsome does.
✓ #23. Go to all your high school reunions because there could be widowers there.
✓ #30. Learn to paint and set up an easel outside of an engineering school.
✓ #25. Go back to your home town because a wild boy next door might now be an eligible bachelor.
✓ #33. Carry a hat box.
✓ #38. Drop a handkerchief. It still works.
✓ #34. Wear a bandaid so he can ask what’s wrong.
✓ #40. Stand in the corner and cry softly because they’ll come over and ask what’s wrong.
(OK, ladies – now you’re ready to go bag that husband!)
-NYPost
REAL (BUT NOT LIKELY TRUE) TABLOID NEWSPSPER HEADLINES:
➠ Man Reincarnated as Himself
➠ Man Takes Out Restraining Order Against Himself
➠ Prune Juice Makes You Stupid
➠ Nebraska Doesn’t Exist, Says Author
➠ New Study Says “Stitch in Time” Saves Only 8
➠ Grim Reaper to Retire – People Will Live Forever!
➠ Jungle Tribe Worships Jay Leno’s Chin
➠ Aliens Travel to Earth for Chinese Food
➠ Mr. Rogers’ Ghost Terrorizing Children!
➠ Massive Loch Ness Monster Fart Swamps Tourist Boat
-BathroomReadersInstitute