07/09/2024
An open letter to anyone who’s stumbling in the darkest time:
I know the desire to accomplish something even when it appears like life isn’t going your way. I understand what it’s like to get up every day thinking that you should be a better version of yourself, but in the end, all you've done is hate yourself for not living up to the standards society expects of you, and you can only blame yourself for not knowing better. I know how it feels to be in constant competition for being a favorite person by those people you treat as a book but only treat you as a chapter. I know how it feels to get knocked down, not by sadness but by emptiness. The feeling of wanting to cry for an unknown reason. I know how it feels to be on the verge of breaking down but still want to see the best of life and hope that someday your time will come.
I’ve been through that phase, and sometimes my soul somehow continues to wander into that place where I think I lost the glow of my eyes, but I’ve learned a lot during my everyday battle with myself. I’ve learned that life isn’t in favor of anyone, and if you feel like everything is falling apart around you, know that you're not alone—we all feel that way sometimes. Even if things might not seem to be going your way, everyone has their own time. God has taken you through many ups and downs in life to prepare you for being the person you were meant to be, and you will know this when your time to shine comes.
Please do not hate yourself because, based on your experiences, it will only ruin your chance to enjoy life. No matter what hardship you’re facing right now, don’t give up. Your pieces may be scattered on the floor, but don’t forget to pick yourself up. You’re the only one who will be willing enough to do that. I also learned that you do not need to prove anything to anyone. You do not have to be someone’s favorite person for you to appreciate yourself because I now know that if you want to be someone’s favorite, be your own favorite person. After all, we know ourselves better than anyone else does. Forgive yourself, but do not forget the lessons that you learned during your darkest time.
I am hoping healing for people out there who are badly wounded by the things that they had forcefully used to fight themselves. You should know that you are wonderfully made and that you are amazing. The darkness that seems to dwell in your life for a very long time will soon be the thing that will make you shine brighter.
-Franz Mherryon
