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27/01/2025

What Changed?
You used to love them. Not just love them...adore them. You looked at them and saw your future, your safe place, your everything. They were the reason your heart raced and the reason it felt at peace.

But now? It’s different. The way they talk, the way they act, the way they make you feel; it’s not the same. And deep down, you’re asking yourself, what went wrong?

The truth is, love isn’t just about feeling. It’s about choosing. And somewhere along the way, maybe they stopped choosing you. Or maybe you stopped choosing them. Love isn’t enough when respect fades, when effort dies, or when one person carries the weight of something that should be shared.

Maybe they became someone you no longer recognized. Or maybe they were always this way, and you were too blinded by love to see it. You gave your all, but love shouldn’t be one-sided. You were building a home together, but suddenly you realized you were the only one holding up the walls.

It hurts because you remember how they used to make you feel. But memories aren’t love, and nostalgia isn’t enough to stay where your heart feels unwanted.

So, what changed? Sometimes, it’s them. Sometimes, it’s you. And sometimes, it’s life showing you that the person you thought would be your forever… was only meant to teach you how to love yourself

27/01/2025

"Have you ever noticed that when someone can't face their own faults they make you the problem instead? It's easier for them to paint you as the villain than to confront their own mistakes or take responsibility for their actions. By placing the blame on you they create a convenient distraction from the truth they've been avoiding. But no matter how much they deflect or shift the narrative it doesn't change the reality of their behavior.
Their actions are a reflection of their own inner struggles and insecurities, not a measure of your worth or who you are.
You don't have to carry the weight of their unresolved issues. Those belong to them, not you."
Yes, always remember that when someone struggles to acknowledge their own faults, they often resort to shifting blame onto others, painting them as the problem rather than facing their own shortcomings.
By casting you as the antagonist, they evade the discomfort of confronting their mistakes or owning up to their actions.
This tactic serves as a convenient distraction from the truths they seek to avoid.
Despite their attempts to deflect or distort the narrative, the reality of their behavior remains unchanged.
Their actions stem from their internal battles and insecurities, reflecting their struggles rather than defining your value or identity. You need not bear the burden of their unresolved issues; those burdens belong solely to them, not to you.

27/01/2025

"Tears of the Strong"
Strong people wear their strength like armor, shielding the world from seeing their cracks.
They carry the burdens of others, mend hearts that aren’t theirs, and whisper words of hope even when their own voices tremble.
But when the night comes and the world grows quiet, their strength gives way to silence.
It’s in those moments, under the dim glow of the moon, that the weight becomes too much.
They cry—not for weakness, but because their hearts need release.
They cry for the battles they’ve fought in silence.
They cry for the pain they’ve endured without complaint.
They cry because they’ve spent so much time holding others together, they’ve forgotten how to heal themselves.
The strongest people know the value of tears.
They know that crying doesn’t diminish their strength—it amplifies it.
It’s a reminder that they’re human, that their struggles are real, and that even the strongest need to break sometimes to rebuild.
These quiet tears are sacred.
They’re the proof of resilience, the evidence of a soul brave enough to face its shadows.
When morning comes, these same strong people will rise again, their hearts a little lighter, their spirits a little stronger, ready to face the world once more.
So if you ever find yourself crying in the solitude of the night, remember this: you’re not breaking. You’re healing. And that, in itself, is strength.

27/01/2025

and my last act of love was leaving you alone so you could go do the things that hurt me, but without me. this statement is a heart-wrenching expression of the pain and sacrifice that can come with loving someone, and it's a poignant reminder that sometimes, the hardest and most loving thing we can do is let go, and that the truest form of love is often the one that requires the most selflessness and sacrifice, and can be a powerful catalyst for growth, healing, and transformation.

leaving someone we love can be one of the most difficult decisions we ever make, as it requires a deep understanding of our own worth and a recognition that we deserve to be happy and fulfilled, and that sometimes, the most loving thing we can do is to prioritize our own needs and well-being, and to take care of ourselves, even if that means letting go of someone we love, and finding the strength to move on and start anew, and to discover a sense of purpose and meaning that is not defined by the relationship.

by leaving, we're not only taking care of ourselves, but we're also giving the other person the space and freedom to make their own choices and decisions, and to grow and learn from their own experiences, and it's a powerful act of self-love and self-care that can be incredibly liberating and empowering, and can ultimately lead to a deeper sense of happiness and fulfillment, and a more profound understanding of ourselves and our place in the world.

it's also important to remember that leaving someone we love doesn't mean we've failed or that we're not worthy of love, but rather that we're recognizing our own worth and taking steps to protect ourselves, and that we deserve to be treated with love, respect, and kindness, and that we should never settle for anything less.

27/01/2025

SHOULD I STAY OR WALK AWAY?
The relationships we find ourselves in should build us and not destroy us, it should add to us and not constantly take from us. A relationship should mostly keep you fulfilled not miserable.
The first thing to consider in making the decision on whether or not to leave or tarry in a relationship is whether or not that relationship is contributing positively or negatively to your life.
If a relationship does not build your confidence and inspire you to go for more, if a relationship saps your energy and joy, if in this relationship you are the only one who has to make the phone calls, buy the gifts and try to please the other party then it is better you give it another thought.
People naturally make time for what they love. no matter how busy, no matter the obstacles people will find a way to get to what they care about.
Work On Yourself First!
Until you are happy, self fulfilled and complete in God...until you can wake up every morning, look in the mirror and give a smile of gratitude for your life you are not ready for a relationship. Relationships are not designed to make you happy, relationship are designed as a way to help two separate happy people come together for common goals and for purpose...and the gelling force between this two should be love.
It took me sometime to study a very important trend about why people do the things they do in relationships and how to know when to let one go or when to hold on to them. Always remember that whether or not you let someone to stay or leave, forgiveness is not optional, it is necessary.
People are driven by three things in life,
1. A mindset
2. Emotions
3. Motive.
Mindsets are fixed mental attitudes cultivated over a period of time through training and experiences. The good thing is, people driven by mindsets could change the moment the find a higher truth than what they used to believe as the truth. If the actions of this 'mind set' partner hurts you and you can't make them reason according to the standards of Gods word let them go. They're not worth it for now.
Emmotions.
Every human being is an emotional being. Which in itself is a good thing because that is what helps to bring out the humanity in us, it is through emotions that we relate in ways that could touch the heart of others. However the wrong application of emotions can be very detrimental in a relationship.
Picture yourself with a girl who does not know how to say No because she never wants to hurt anyone's feelings...How many desperate proposals do you think she will accept? How many sexual advances do you think she will give in to?
Know your boundaries and be sure you don't allow people to keep crossing it, it's for your own security.
A partner could be driven by a momentary uncontrollable emotions such as anger to say things he or she didn't mean, and this may apply to a few other areas...after forgiving it's okay to give it another shot but please weigh the situation. Be sure you are not going the values of God's word and mentally assuming the position of a forgiveness when in actual fact what you doing is being too selfish to let go. A wise woman once said when your hands are full..there will be no space for God to give you something new. How true this is, if you don't let go the dynamite in your hands, when it explodes you will definitely be a part of the shuttered pieces. Be bold to demand the best from life.
Motive
This is premeditated action for reasons beneficial to the person who carries out those actions. Irrespective of how much they thought that could benefit the other party it is mostly based on selfishness.
As a matter of personal policy this is the kind of people I don't think twice about before kicking out of my life. A person with unknown motive can be the most dangerous cancer in your life, they are those who will actually sit down and scheme to get something done even if that thing will hurt the people who love them. They tend to think the rewards are more important than your hurt or complains.
Note such people don't always appear defensive, they may admit, cry in the open, go down in their knees and apologize...but let the situation present itself, they will do the same thing again.
Please and please again, if you are in a relationship with such a person, park your bags and run for your life. It will not end well.
Never for a single day think you can change a person for yourself. That is more like witchcraft. Human beings are free moral agents and will change if they so choose by themselves and by what they avail themselves to. Let me re-emphasize this point...you cannot change a human being and more so for yourself, don't deceive yourself. It's a take it as it is or leave it affair...Be advised.
In conclusion, always remember that a good relationship makes you feel good.
A better relationship is for the better and...
The best relationship brings out the best in you.
Any relationship that is not governed by the word of God will fail.
God bless you!

Disclaimer : I hereby declare that I do not own the rights to this post.
All rights belong to the owner.
©️ No Copyright Infringement Intended.

27/01/2025

27/01/2025

There’s a quiet devastation in the spaces left by words unspoken and endings unexplained. It’s not the departure itself that haunts us but the absence of acknowledgment—the silence stretching where closure should be. These unresolved moments carve deeply into us, leaving wounds that heal not with clarity but with time and self-reckoning. Yet, hidden within this ache lies a profound opportunity to reshape our understanding of loss and resilience.

We are storytellers by nature, endlessly seeking meaning in the events of our lives. When a relationship ends without explanation, it disrupts that narrative, leaving us scrambling to piece together fragments of what remains. We revisit conversations, scrutinize memories, and question our role in the unraveling. But what we’re truly searching for is not merely answers—it’s permission to move forward. Life, however, often denies us that luxury.

Unfinished endings are a different kind of teacher. They strip away our illusions of control and force us into the uncharted terrain of uncertainty. This is where transformation begins—not in the resolution we crave but in the resilience we cultivate in its absence. It’s an uncomfortable truth: the closure we seek rarely comes from others. It is something we must create for ourselves.

In this way, unspoken goodbyes mirror life itself: unpredictable, unresolved, and often devoid of the tidy conclusions we expect. They remind us of the limits of our influence over others and the need to anchor ourselves in something steadier—our own inner peace. To live is to experience loss, and to grow is to learn that not all losses come with explanations.

But how do we navigate this ambiguity? How do we quiet the restless thoughts and unmet longings stirred by unanswered goodbyes? The answer lies not in seeking external resolution but in embracing the silence as a space for reflection and renewal. The discomfort of uncertainty can become a catalyst for self-discovery—a moment to ask not why someone left but what their absence teaches us about our own strength.

Philosophers and thinkers across time have grappled with the challenge of letting go. The Stoics taught us to focus not on what we cannot control but on what lies within our power: our perceptions, our responses, and our ability to grow. Marcus Aurelius reminds us that tranquility is found not in external circumstances but in aligning our minds with the present moment. These teachings offer a roadmap through the fog of unspoken goodbyes, urging us to cultivate inner stability when external answers elude us.

Letting go of the need for closure doesn’t mean forgetting or ignoring the pain. It means honoring the loss while choosing not to let it define us. It means shifting our focus from what we’ve lost to what remains and what we can build from here. This process is neither quick nor easy, but it is transformative. Over time, the unanswered questions lose their sting, and the silence becomes less of a void and more of a canvas—a space where we can create our own meaning.

It’s in these moments of growth that we discover something remarkable: the strength to stand unshaken in the face of life’s uncertainties. Every unanswered goodbye teaches us patience, grace, and the ability to carry on without the neat conclusions we once thought we needed. They show us that our worth is not defined by who stays or goes but by the courage we display in the aftermath.

The pain of unresolved endings doesn’t simply vanish. It lingers, reshaping us in subtle ways. But its presence is not just a reminder of loss—it’s a testament to our capacity for love, hope, and vulnerability. And with time, the edges of that pain soften, giving way to a quiet strength that no unanswered question can diminish.

So, what does it mean to embrace the unknown? To let go of the demand for answers and instead find meaning within ourselves? Perhaps it’s about trusting that we are more resilient than we believe—that we can face life’s uncertainties with an open heart. Perhaps it’s about choosing to see each loss as an invitation to grow—a chance to step into the fullness of who we are, even when the path ahead feels unclear.

In the end, the silence left by an unspoken goodbye is not just an absence; it’s a space brimming with potential. It’s an opportunity to rewrite our story—not with answers but with the wisdom gained in their absence. And maybe, just maybe, the most profound closure is realizing we don’t need closure at all.

What might you discover if you stopped searching for resolution and instead trusted yourself to navigate the unknown?

26/01/2025

WORTH SHARING:

"Behavior is very important to me. I pay close attention to how someone speaks to me, their actions, and the tone they use in different situations.

If someone's behavior is not respectful—no matter how important they are—I perceive them as a person of low character, and my relationship with them will never be harmonious.

I feel at ease talking to people who communicate with humility and politeness, while I consistently keep my distance from those with unruly behavior."

26/01/2025

A mistake is something done by accident, something that is not planned. But cheating and lying are not mistakes; they are known choices. When someone cheats or lies, they have decided to break the trust and hurt the other. It's not accidental; it is intentional. Mistakes can be pardoned because they are done without any intention, but cheating and lying depict lack of respect and honesty.

If you really care for a person, you don't make decisions that will hurt them. Love is built on trust, and such intentional actions can destroy it. Choose honesty and loyalty always.

26/01/2025

This is how you forgive someone who broke your heart:

You forgive them by giving yourself time to heal. It’s not something that happens all at once, and it doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a gradual process. Some days you take two steps forward and four steps back. It might not always make sense, but every day you grow a little stronger, a little more resilient—even if it doesn’t feel like it.

You forgive them by focusing on yourself. Stop pouring your energy into negativity. Disconnect. Unfollow. Take care of yourself. Reread your favorite books, spend time with your closest friends, and remind yourself of the joy and positivity that still exist around you. Allow your heart the space to rest and remember how to smile again.

You forgive them by stepping away from the situation. The longer you dwell in the pain, the more it takes root. It’s hard, but you have to let it go. Acknowledge your emotions and honor your feelings, but don’t keep replaying the past. Picture the pain like a balloon—let it float away. Say goodbye. It no longer has the power to hurt you.

You forgive them by accepting what happened. This doesn’t mean the pain disappears. It doesn’t mean you’re excusing their actions or letting them off the hook. They are still accountable for what they did. But it means recognizing that what’s done cannot be undone. There’s no rewind button—you can only move forward.

You forgive them by reclaiming your life. Because your life is so much bigger than the person who broke your heart.”

26/01/2025

Do you know what the biggest loss in a person’s life is?

It’s losing someone you once loved deeply.

But do you know what’s a loss a thousand times greater than that? Losing someone who loved you perfectly and unconditionally.

The day you realize that the person who once loved you with tender care, like a doting pet cat, no longer feels the same, you’ll feel a sharp pain in your chest. You’ll wake up in the middle of the night, unable to sleep peacefully.

Not because you lost someone you loved, but because you lost someone who loved you. That regret will tear you apart. The admiration you feel for someone you love may eventually dry up like a river in drought, but the regret of losing someone who truly loved you will burn in your heart for a lifetime, like an eternal flame without a cause.

In this world, countless people will come and go in your life. You may love them deeply and forget them too. But those who love you deeply—such people come into your life only once or twice, and often, not at all.

If you lose a house, you can buy another. If your car breaks down, you can fix it. You can sell, buy, and trade land, owning thousands of properties. But if you lose a cherished person, you’ll never find another like them again.

The person who once waited for you like a faithful dog may still be waiting—but not for you anymore. The person who would’ve gladly died for you just by looking into your eyes may still be ready to die—but not for you. The person who once wanted to live a thousand years resting on your chest may still want to live—but not with their head on your chest.

When you carelessly lose such a perfect person, no compensation in life can ever make up for it.

A person will hold on to their loved one even in the strongest currents, clinging to a straw to survive by the riverbank. But if that person is swept away by the current, they’ll keep going farther and farther, while you do nothing to hold them back. You thought they’d stay, that they wanted to stay, and somehow, they would.

But one day, you wake up on a sunny, sweet morning to find the storm has passed, the flood has subsided—but the person who wanted to stay is no longer there. They’ve been swept away to another river or a different sea. Often, even if a person doesn’t leave on their own, life’s storms will carry them away if you don’t know how to hold on to them.

If you reach out to touch them now, if you go close and say, "Please, caress my head once," you’ll see that in their touch, in their presence, there’s no trace of you anymore.

This is where you’ve suffered your greatest defeat, your biggest loss.

The person is still there—but they’re not yours anymore.

This loss will one day make the world, heavy with people, feel like an empty desert to you.

There will be millions of people around you, yet not a single one will feel like your own. There will be countless people who have you, but no one who you truly have.

Such an immense loss can never be compensated for in life. There’s no replacement for such a precious person once they’re gone.

It’s impossible—utterly impossible. Lose someone like this once, and you’ll understand everything clearly.

So, while there’s still time, value the ones who truly matter.

26/01/2025

“What is the best feeling in the world?”
- Safety

Despite your bad moods, they stay.
Even when you’re having a bad day, they stay.
And when you can’t find the right words to say, they understand and stay.

Nothing’s better than knowing that someone will stay no matter how rough it gets.

26/01/2025

I told you I was struggling,
Showed you the cracks beneath the surface,
But instead of helping me heal,
You poured salt into the wounds.

You saw my weaknesses and turned them into weapons,
Each word you spoke cut deeper,
And as I stood on the edge, barely holding on,
You gave me one more push.

It’s like you enjoyed watching me crumble,
Like seeing me lost gave you power.
You knew exactly where to strike,
Playing my mind like a game you couldn’t lose.

I wanted to be strong for you,
Wanted to be the one you could count on,
But you kept tearing me down,
Piece by piece, until nothing was left.

Now I sit here, broken and empty,
And somehow, I’m the one to blame.
You’ll say I was too distant, too cold,
That I couldn’t open up, couldn’t be enough.

And while you paint yourself as the victim,
The world will listen to your story,
But no one will see the quiet destruction
You left behind in me.

20/01/2025

"Just because I bring something up, it doesn't mean I want to argue. I want to resolve things, get clarity, learn, and grow together. We are adults., let's communicate."

14/01/2025

Why is it important to acknowledge our mistakes?

Mistakes happen with everyone, but those who accept them learn, improve, and grow from their experiences.

Often, when we make a mistake, we become defensive because it makes feel small, lower our egos, or we are afraid of the consequences. While it may work in our favor temporarily, we ultimately people's trust, diminishing our ability to improve, and lowering our chances of succeess in life.

Having the courage to apologise. Speak to the person affected, take responsibility, and work to improve the situation. Offer support and sympathy. Be prepared for potential temporary repercussions and losses, but remember that with a clear conscience, you will ultimately gain more in life.

Dr Bhawna Gautam