The RHEMA of LIGHT

22/09/2022

15/03/2022

It takes only absolute FAITH to melt down the mountain of doubt and the hill of confusion, walk boldly upon the sea of problems and tough-time, and fly purposefully over the valley of failure.

Give yourself to much conscious prayer activities, being wholly in spirit, and you have yourself building the mansion of FAITH.

10/03/2022

LET YOUR LIGHT SHINE! (Matt. 5:14-16)
Light will never be seen as light if it's not brought in the midst of darkness.
Light only stands out in the midst of darkness. Nevertheless, there are lights that shine brighter (than other lights); that is specifically still considered from the aspect of the measure of darkness.

Therefore, GOD (being GOD in every respect) will never be really noticed as being 'good' if His works are not set in the midst of dark-works or attracting bad or evil deeds.

GOD is the Spirit of Courage: for He is fearless. He is the Spirit of Victory: for challenge is the fuel of His Lamp of Goodness. He is that GOD whose light scares away and wholly eradicates darkness (and the whole spirits of darkness). He is that GOD whose involvement conventionally paralyses defeat and any form of failure.

GOD is the Maker of light. Everything He created is wonderfully and fearfully made. Every single one of them is a project of light. GOD has made and set you as a light to your generation (even to the ones after you). You are planted here to make your light shine. So, fear not! Fear not, however the magnitude of the darkness set around your life. However the ups and downs about your pursuit; however the terrible experience around your marital life, business and/or career; however the tough time around your walk of faith--fear not: for you are in for a purpose. You are in to make a difference; mainly to stand out. You are here in this world of trouble to make your light shine.

You are a project of light established to scare and clear away darkness. You are here as a project of testimony; a project of great result. Let your light shine!

Believe in the GOD whose throne is beautified with the spoils (results) of VICTORY. Trust wholly in the GOD whose involvement commands VICTORY, however tough is the situation. Be steadfast in your walk of faith. Be mindful of who you are purposefully: a light, set to make some shine. Don't be afraid to shine. And don't wait to shine. Start now. Even if you are still learning--go shining behaviourally, (with good habits and right attitudes) in your dealings (with people and situations) and otherwise.

GOD is not afraid to have you in midst of challenges because He is very sure that He made and has a project of victory out there to make some shine. You only become a problem to GOD, and the generations you are designed and sent to bless with your good work, when you fail (to shine). Notwithstanding, if you fail, He is not: He will however reorganise another project to claim that very victory you fail to claim.

Resolve to use well the chance given to you; claiming the required victory. Resolve to make your light shine.

Let me help you with a strategy that can help you make way in all of these!

Get your attention off all the troubles that challenge of yours is bringing to the court (of trial), and focus intensely on GOD who has made and plant you out there as a project. GOD never set any of His project out there over situation to fail but to win. If you are failing, it's a problem to GOD. He cannot stand having you failed. Look up to Him, in helping you through. Build on the foundation of the availability of His helping-hand. The boat of His sufficient grace is usually available to all His projects (of light). When you fix your focus on GOD, that will guide you into the boat of grace which will help you sail through, against all the odds of the sea of life. With GOD on your side, you are sure to win, with unstoppable bright shining light.

Fear not! Let your light shine!

17/05/2021

PLANNING FOR MARRIAGE
(The Continuity)
*TEMPERAMENT TRAITS*
Do you know your temperament? Do you know that of your partner?
Knowing your temperament and that of your partner will do you lot of good in the area of decision making, and self-coordination over the management of marital issues.
There are mainly four temperaments which are divided into two:
- Extrovert (Choleric and Sanguine)
- Introvert (Melancholy and Phlegmatic)
Dominantly, if you aren’t an extrovert, then you must be an introvert. Though, one can’t just be of only one temperament—there must be some blends, such as having the sense of one or two more pronouncing in your attitudes along with the predominant temperament.
*CHARACTERISTICS OF EACH TEMPERAMENT*
Each temperament has its own unique characteristics. The following are some of the characteristics common with each respective temperament.
(I) *CHOLERIC*
- Short-tempered
- Extrovert (out-spoken)
- Self-confidence
- Impatience (restless)
- Dominating (leader-like)
- Authoritative
- Goal-getter (impulsive, task-oriented, ambitious)
- Strict (no nonsense kind, disciplinarians)
- Organised
- Courageous
- Inspiring
- Passionate
- Ever ready (active, energetic)
- They still want to try like they know when they don’t really know
- Straightforward
- Fast
- Irritable (touchy)
- Aggressive
- Decisive
- Optimistic
(ii) *SANGUINE*
- Highly social (man or woman of the people)
- Extrovert
- Enthusiastic (lively)
- Jovial
- Unsteady
- Easygoing
- Highly careless (carefree)
- Highly tolerable and considerate
- Self-confidence
- Unorganised
- Rough ready (creative)
- Responsive (they will never accept that they don’t know even when it’s clear that they don’t)
- Highly flexible to change (easily compromise, fast leaner)
- Proud
- Not secretive (talkative)
- Forgetful
- Sarcastic
(iii) *MELANCHOLY*
- Perfectionist (accurate)
- Time-consumer (slow)
- Highly strategic (analytical, tactful, wise)
- Having unforgiving issue (hardly forgive and/or forget)
- Highly intelligent
- Introverted (moody, loners)
- Independent
- Fragile
- Diligent
- Reserved (quiet)
- Highly organised (careful)
- Dislike emergency (Only want to be prepared when fully prepared)
- Sensible (when they know, they know and if they don’t, they will accept they don’t)
- Self-consciousness
- Anxious (highly worried)
- Unsociable
- Rigid
- Pessimistic
(iv) *PHLEGMATIC*
- Highly reserved (calm)
- Introvert
- Affectionate
- Highly phobic
- Productive
- Curious
- Lack self-confidence
- Never ready
- They know but will never accept that they do
- Highly conscious
- Fearfully strategic
- Time-traders (like trading out their time, delegators)
- Relaxed
- Highly peaceful
- Reliable
- Good-listeners
- Thoughtful (rational)
- Passive
- Kind
- Caring (domestic, parents)
- Steady (steadfast)
- Observant
*TEMPERAMENTAL MATCHING*
Possibly, anyone of a particular temperament could get married to someone of the same or different temperament, considered they both have good understanding of the individual temperaments and most importantly worked on themselves. Notwithstanding, there are some particular temperaments that naturally match some other, in the area of completing one another. For instance, due to the carefree, unsteady, responsive (always wants to win arguments) and unsecretive nature of the sanguine, it will be charming and natural for such a person to go well relationally with a phlegmatic partner who is naturally careful, steadfast, peaceful considerably and secretive, to respectively support the sanguinaceous weaknesses. Another example is the case of a melancholy who is pessimistic, slow (in goal-getting) and accuracy-oriented (being inconclusive over projects), it will be charming and natural for such a person to go well relationally with a choleric partner who is naturally optimistic, fast and impulsive (decisively), to respectively support the melancholic weaknesses.
There are some specific traits that can’t be generalised—it takes the required qualities to influence them.
*TENACIOUS TRAITS—Secondary Issues*
So many people are getting it wrong; thinking that what naturally worked for them with ease could work for other in such manner. Get this right! Generally, it is common for the melancholy (all melancholic predominant blend—mel-chol, mel-sang, and mel-phleg) to aptly go well with the choleric but there are some specific traits that require a specific temperament blend to be tenaciously effectual in supporting the temperament issues. Like I said earlier, one can’t just be of only one temperament—there must be some blends, such as having the sense of one or two more pronouncing in your attitudes along with the predominant temperament. The melancholy are the kind that can charmingly help others to wisely see reasons and give efficient strategies, good enough, to work on their weaknesses due to their natural melancholic strengths of being observant and strategic. Nevertheless, they usually find it difficult to solely work on their personal weaknesses (such as the act of being naturally rigid).
Most efficient preachers who considerably like to have people doing what they say but not what they do are (predominantly) of this temperament. The melancholy could influence change in the lives of others (in overcoming their weaknesses such as tough habits and phobias) but usually find it difficult to solely work on their personal weaknesses; due to their rigid nature. If they have an addiction or a habitual problem, it will specifically take only a chol-mel (a disciplinarian who is naturally with goal-getting traits, also optimistic and dominating, blending with some strategic traits) to be able to gracefully overcome their (melancholic) rigid nature and equally work on the behavioural problem—successfully. The same with other dominant temperaments—they individually have some specific traits, just too tough, to be specifically handled or managed gracefully by a specific temperament blend. Outside that, it’s a call for some mysterious marital problems.
Therefore, when you have someone gracefully influenced some change on his or her partner, that doesn’t really mean that you can apply the same methods to win in your own case. The question here is: “Do you really have what it takes?” Innately, we human are respectively differ from one another in grace—just individually unique.
Know that there are habitual problems that aren’t natural issues; they are wholly spiritual—which could be far above human capacity. However the case—either natural or spiritual—ideally, it is only GOD that can certainly change any person. So, consider temperament traits very crucial. . . .
Knowing and understanding your temperament and that of your partner (to be) is very crucial. Though, environment, class (state of living), and age do influence change on people temperamentally, don’t ever think that you can personally change someone. The only one that can change anybody is GOD.
It’s necessary you have the knowledge of the temperaments of the both of you so to know how to work on yourself if there is need.
Thanks for reading!
I will (equally in details) continue on the fourth major conditions to watch out for when considering marriage.
By:

15/05/2021

PLANNING FOR MARRIAGE
(The Continuity)
2. LIKES AND DISLIKES
This is another considered area of life that has been causing lots of issues between couples (in their respective marriages).
What are your likes and dislikes?
What are those things, expressions, acts or statements you like so much, which in any case, can't be traded? And what are those you detest so much, which you can't in anyway behold or withstand?
Moreover, what are the likes and dislikes of the person you'll be having as partner in that marriage? Do you really have some sound knowledge about these?
Consider your likes and dislikes—don’t take them for granted. And ensure you know, at least, the primary likes and dislikes of the person you are considering as partner in marriage.
Knowing the likes and dislikes of your spouse will definitely help you to know how to live with him or her. A couple that know their personal likes and dislikes and those of their partners will definitely put the storm of marital mystery under control. The knowledge will help the couple to know what and what to disciplinarily avoid and those to embrace (and work on, in some cases).
Likes and dislikes relatively affect other areas of life. In marital life, virtually all areas are influenced by them.
(i) Food
Likes and dislikes intensely affect the aspect of food and feeding, in marriage. They determine people’s modes of dieting—what, when and how to eat. They determine where to eat and do shopping for food, food stuffs and/or ingredients. They determine people’s table manners; and also determine people’s level of intakes.
There are people who detest eating meat and fish. This set of people is prone to become vegetarians. But if you aren't like them, there is a need for you to relate with such people with good understanding of their persons. You are you. And your partner is his or her own person entirely. Coming together, understanding your individual traits is one of the effectual marital weapons required in doing some good fights against all odds in the marriage.
Underestimating the influence of likes and dislikes in relational issues has really caused lots of marriages to be experiencing some mysterious challenges that are rocking their marital boats on daily basis; especially in the aspect of food. Imagine a man who so much loves eating dog-meat but intensely detests pork, which smelling it alone can cause him to throw up. But he gets married to a woman who so much loves eating pork, and prefers preparing it solely at home; however, she couldn’t do without preparing it (at least) twice in a week, due to her intense love for the pig-meat. Nevertheless, the wife, on the other hand, detests dog-meats, she equally disgusts having such cooked in her pots. To crown it all, only the news that such meat is prepared in her kitchen alone could get her passed out. Thus, how do you expect this couple to cope in the marriage?
Consider your likes and dislikes and those of your partner (to be), mainly to know how to weigh things and consider your give-and-take aspect of them all and your (reasonable) decision concerning what you have on ground.
Marriage is a vital union. Everything about it should be taken seriously. There just some certain things we cannot compromise—something we couldn’t let go, however the cost, or that which we can never entertain, no matter what.
(ii) S*x life
Likes and dislikes also affect s*x life. This is another aspect of matrimony that impose issues on the lives of couples.
There are marriages that really do not involve s*x. I’d counselled a couple who had s*x utterly out of the purpose of their marital tie. That’s an agreement. A business oriented kind, anyway. When I asked them of how they were coping with their respective s*x lives, their reply were (relatively) supprising. They both actually have their respective alternatives—not the kinds involving infidelity.
The both parties crazily have some intense regards for their matrimonial vows.
When considering marriage—if it's not the kind without s*x—ensure you have a good understanding of the likes and dislikes of your partner, weighing them in line with yours in the area of s*x. Just enure you know, at least to an extent, some of the realities you are going in there to face.
Let me be a bit more candid here! There are people who crazily desire annal s*x; they aren’t just sastified without running such during s*x. If you can’t contain such, that would be a problem. There are some who crazily desire oral s*x; if you can’t give them a head, that would impose a problem. Some people like it in all manners of positioning; and if you’re not in for that kind of marital exercise, that would be a problem. Moreover, some like having a (very) long-lasting kind, due to the fact that such is the only way they could satisfactorily attain climax. And they detest having it without attaining their desired climax. If you cannot support that long-lasting marital exercise, you’re in for trouble.
So many people are suffering emotionally in their respective marriages today, mostly because they want to stay faithful. Some have dabbled in some strange alternatives outside their marriage (running some adultrious exercise); while some are measuring up with some (s*x) toys. S*x is just one of the major issues that are disengaging marriage. Most divorces could be traced to s*x issues.
Consider your likes and dislikes; they are very paramount in marriage. Remember, you aren’t going to be there, in it, alone. You are going to be in the matrimonial boat with someone taken as your better half. How well your boat sails in the relational ocean, peacefully and healthily, is determined by the understanding of the crucial facts you consider about marriage (in line with your personal traits and those of your spouse).
(iii) Faith
Likes and dislikes also affect the aspect of faith—which ultimately say much on people’s spiritual lives. They determine people’s ways of worship, prayer lives and choice of religion.
They also affect people’s choices and modes of service in their place of worship or fellowship.
There are people who don’t like evangelism—they just can’t stand the task—but they have their own way of supporting those who evangelise (especially, financially).
Likes and dislikes also determine people’s choice of religion or denomination to worship (conveniently). People who don’t like church settings could choose to go doing their worships as Muslims. Notwithstanding, some sets of Islam-born who (somehow) do not like Islam doctrines could like to convert and do their worships as Christians. Moreover, those females who so much like dressing in pairs of trousers could prefer to go to the denominations where they could conveniently be in fellowship with the members of the local churches which doctrines support such mode of dressing.
Likes and dislikes also determine the nature and intensity of people’s beliefs.
(iv) Communication
Likes and dislikes also affect ways of communication, and the language used by people. There are statements some people like to be used, and there are some detestably considered to be derogatory.
To some people, there are some certain set of people they wouldn’t like to be mentioned or involved in your conversations with them. For reverence purpose, some people won’t like you to mention or involve their parents or other older relatives in their personal matrimonial matters. And from hatred aspect, some people wouldn't like to have you mentioned some particular people in your discussion with them—those they are considering as haters or foes.
While some so much like 'gisting thing', some people don't just like too much talking thing. Even as a lot of people are going crazy with the use of text messages in this era of Social-media, IT world, some don't just like any form of test message—their irrational hatred for that won't just let them attend it. They prefer vocal conversation.
(v) Strategies And Decisions
Likes and dislikes utterly affect people's strategies and decisions in life. They determine the nature of their strategic plans; also their choices and decision making.
(vi) Habit
Likes and dislikes also affect people's habits. They determine people's thinking habits, relational habits (e.g. s*x habits, giving and sharing habits), spiritual habits, working habits and emotional habits. They support the approach of habit instilment, and the measures of getting rid of habits.
(vii) Fear and Phobia
Likes and dislikes ultimately affect fears (normal fears) and phobias (abnormal fears).
It is normal to respond with fear, only towards realities. Whatever is that thing or situation you are (intensely) afraid to lose will definitely pose irrational fear (an aspect of phobia). Whatever you detest will usually pose displeasure; and when you are made to often get exposed to such, it will develop into an aspect of phobia called displeasing irritation. Phobia involves irrational fear, abnormal hatred and displeasing irritation. Some very good examples of irrational fear are the fear of dummies; the fear of old age or getting old; and the fear of having wrinkles. Some very good examples of abnormal hatred are the fear or abnormal hatred for strangers (xenophobia); the fear or abnormal hatred for step-mothers; and the fear and abnormal hatred for children. Some very good examples of displeasing irritation are the abnormal displeasure or discomfort deriving when get exposed to the scene of blood, injection or exposed to a place of height.
Understanding your partner's likes and dislikes (and also those of yours) will definitely help you to put fear and phobia under control.
(viii) Other Major Watch-Out
Likes and dislikes extensively affect every other aspects of marriage meant to watch out for. They affect people's reasons and purposes for going into marriage—mostly, in the area of ways of reasoning (mentality) and decisive dispositions.
They affect people's temperament traits—mostly, in the way they coordinate themslves, respond to situations, and interact with their immediate environment, and their fellows.
They also affect people's love languages—mostly, in the area of what specifically they like to sense, have (as presents), and have done (at a particular period of time). They have great influence on people’s ways of sharing quality time together.
They also affect people's preparation states—mostly, in their ways of considerations, planning and executions.
There are people who habitually don't like preparing ahead—they just like fire-brigade approach (late or emergency preparation), or impromptu approach, in dealing with situations. People like that are prone to be having fatal issues they least expect, in marriage. . .
However the case, ensure you have some good understanding of the likes and dislikes of the one you're going into a marriage with, at least to an extent; for that's a key to really know how to make some rational decision on the facts gotten, and/or to be readily prepared (decisively).
Thanks for reading!
I will continue on the third major conditions to watch out for when considering marriage. It will also be explained in details.
By:

13/05/2021

*1. PURPOSES OF MARRIAGE*

Why do you want to marry?

There are various reasons why a lot of people are engaging in marriage. This could be for some reasons personally known to the individuals involved or some specific reasons established from others’ views.

The reasons for getting involved in a marriage are very crucial. The purpose of a marriage is what ultimately designs the nature of the marriage.

There are diverse purposes of marriage; some of the major ones include:
*(i) Companionship*
This is one of the most common of all the reasons of getting involved in marriage. A lot of people just want marriage because they need someone they can be spending (most of) their time with. They need a partner to keep them company, sharing virtually everything together in life.

Some, here, do not really care for children—that’s not their primary reason why they are in that marriage or never even an option or agenda. All they want is just the companionship.

*(ii) Children*
This is another most common of reasons of getting involved in marriage. A lot of people just want in mainly for children—biological descendant. And in some cases, some want in mainly because of co-breeder (someone to help them breed their already born children).

Moreover, there are some, most especially the impotent or barren, who mainly involved in a certain marriage (with single mothers or fathers) for a cover up. They just want to be recognised by children.

*(iii) Support*
Some people want in mainly for some support—financially, domestically, and/or ministerially. All they want to be in a marriage for is just for some helping-hand. They want someone that could help them going in life, easing their challenges.

*(iv) Business*
Some other set of people do involve in marriage mainly for business. Here, some do involve mainly to make money directly from their partners, who they see as assets; while some other do involve just to collaborate with their partners, in other to win business deals or run business organisations together.

*(v) Connection*
Some set of people do involve in marriage mainly for links; probably to acquire a particular level of class (for higher standard of living), for a particular office, job, contract, deal, opportunity, privilege and title.

*(vi) Membership or Citizenship*
Some set of people do involve in marriage mainly to become members of a particular family, or become a citizen of a state.

*(vii) Reconciliation*
Some set of people are made to get involved in marriage mainly as a sign of reconciliation between two families, communities, kingdoms or nations. This is ultimately a kind of marriage considered from others’ views.

*(viii) S*x*
Some set of people do involve in marriage mainly for making love, having romance and/or just for some carnal pleasure. This is common with people driven by lust and infatuation. Some other set of people involving in marriage for this reason are people who have s*x habitual problem.

*(ix) Desire*
Some set of people just get involved in marriage all because they like the idea of marriage. They just don’t really have any other reasonable (primary) reason for involving in marriage. They just want to be recognised as being married.

(x) Age-Threat
So many people do get involved in marriage due the fear of getting too old. And this is one of the major reasons why a lot of people (especially the female) are usually getting involved in marriage, hastily. This is common with people of their late 30’s (especially the female counterparts); and very much of intense pressure with singles who are already in their 40’s. Considering their respective ages, they get pressurised and threatened by time—which they usually assume is no longer on their side.

There are three sets of females who are commonly challenged with this. Those who are chubby: usually presumed to be highly prone to quickly experience having their body wear off. Another set of ladies are those who so much desire bearing their own child and have that as (one of) their primary purpose(s) of getting involved marriage, but have age personally speaking volumes about them, the fear of attaining their menopause could hastily buy them in. Moreover, those who are single mothers who desire having co-breeders and have that as (one of) their primary purpose(s) of getting involved marriage, could equally give in, hastily.

*THE SIGNIFICANCE OF KNOWING YOUR PURPOSE FOR MARRIAGE*
It is true that when the purpose of something is unknown, the abuse of that very thing is inevitable. When you don’t really know the reason (the primary purpose) why you are getting involved in a marriage, you are bound to go sailing ignorantly in the ocean of mystery; which could pose displeasure, suffering and regret.

Marriage is a union involving two parties; not only you. You really need to know the reasons or purpose why you are getting into a marriage. Equally, you need to know why the person you want to consider as partner want in too—this is very crucial. If you (to an extent) know yourself, what about the other person? Do you really know his or her reasons or purpose of coming into the marriage? Please, do—because there are lots of marriages which boats are rocking terribly by internal storms (the partners’ metalities, choices and mysteries). Many marriages had eventually yield to the sting of divorce; hence, had the boats of their marriage sunk or capsized in the relational ocean. And there are still many more out there battling with the sting, mainly established by the troubles of internal and external challenges. Some people wish they never involved in the marriage they are in right now; and those with no choice go living on, endurably—mainly dying in silence.

My dear, knowing the purposes of the two parties involved for a marriage is very paramount. The following are some of the significance of knowing the purposes of marriage.

*(i) Certainty*
Knowing the purposes of marriage will definitely help you to be certain in the areas of choice and decision making. You will know and be very sure of what you want or need.

*(ii) Focus*
Knowing the purposes of your partner and that of yours for a marriage will also help you to focus, even in the marriage. The knowledge and level of understanding concerning the purposes will help you to be steadfast and avoid compromise.

*(iii) Reasonability*
Knowing the purposes of marriage will help you to be reasonable. It will help you to have some good knowledge of yourself and the person you’re to spend your life with in the marriage. It will equally help you to know the kind of marriage you’re to design, for good. And it will also help in shaping your level of understanding. It will clearly help you to avoid going in blindly (ignorantly).

*(iv) Responsibility*
Knowing the purposes will also help you to be responsible. It will help you to be more dedicated and committed in the marriage—where you will know how to fight and resolve issues and challenges that surface in the marriage. . . .

Thanks for reading!

I will continue with the second major conditions to watch out for when considering marriage. It will be equally explained in details.

Shalom!
By:

12/05/2021

PLANNING FOR MARRIAGE
Preparation is the brook of readiness. Preparation is the mother of confidence. And preparation is the tablet of certainty. You can’t really predominate in what you do not prepare for. Anything or situation you aren’t ready for imposes on you much more fight to do; causing you much time, much stress, and much pain—however, if you must face it. And if you aren’t certain about a situation you are involved in, you are bound to go swimming in the ocean of mystery.
Marriage isn’t just a love affair union; it’s that involving two individuals (a male and a female coming together to form a marital couple under a specific agreement) that must respectively take charge. Marriage is not a baby game; not for people who aren’t matured. It is not for people who aren’t prepared. Not for the little mind. Marriage is meant for responsible people. It’s for the matured and people with great mind.
The mysterious tides of marriage usually carry off those who get involved in a marriage they aren’t prepared for, into the ocean of displeasure, suffering and regret. Definitely, we prepare for marriage; we don’t prepare in marriage. If not, you will end up suffering, emotionally, physically and otherwise—as you go about it preparing in it with much struggles, stress and pain. If you must be confident and sure enough of the issues you have before you concerning marriage, prepare for it.
There are five major conditions to watch out for when considering the act of involving in a marriage; which involves the parties’:
- Purposes of marriage
- Likes and dislikes
- Temperament traits
- Love languages
- Preparation states
One after the other, all these five major conditions to watch out concerning marriage will be explained in details—mainly to your understanding.
By: