Precious chinwe jokes

18/06/2024

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08/10/2023

Runs girl: *taps me* Bros I don wear clothes finish come pay me make I dey go.

Me: *rolls on bed weakly* Oh, okay. Open that drawer next to you, e dey inside.

R Girl: *Opens it* Bros money no dey here o.

Me: Ahn Ahn I kept it there na. *stands up to check* See am na.

R Girl:

Me: *Tear the bread open then keeps it beside her*

R Girl: Bros wetin be all this one wey you dey do like this give me money make I dissolve from here na abi you want make I change am for you.

Me: Shey this one dey whine me ni! See your money beside you na. Wetin bible talk for - Proverbs 6:26 ~

R girl: Because I dey do this work no mean say I no dey go church or I no know bible o I dey come. *brings out phone and opens bible app*

which scripture you talk again?

Me: (Proverbs 6:26)

R Girl: “For the price of a pr******te is a loaf of bread...”

Me: For the price of a pr******te is a what?

R girl: 👇

06/10/2023

just arrived to my boyfriend place because there was no electricity in my house so I decide to visit him becuz he told me they have steady light, reaching there, he prepared a very good meal for me . he even asked if i eat white meat and i said yes babe. The food taste nice Sha!! Maybe becuz I was hungry i couldn't figure out the taste, after eating he served me small small fried meat, I ate all without minding the taste, maybe if I've been eating it before I would've known the different taste of meat, so this afternoon before i just left i said, its hot i need cold water babe.... then he said just "check in the fridge " when I opened the fridge, guess what I saw? boom now its face to face

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21/09/2023

Married to a monster👺👺👹👹👹(part 3)

Thats how I kept on crying till I felt asleep...
"Hahaha hahaha hahaha🤣🤣,mama the mama,now you are trapped,you are in my cage,you think you are wise?you are after ministers right?now I Hope you are enjoying 😋😋😋 the marriage with a honeymoon of insult?next is not insult is dead"
"Jesus!Jesus"I shouted so it was a dream now am more afraid than before
"How dare you mention that name you daughter of a witch"I heard my husband saying
"Open this door now"he commanded still knocking so hard as if he want to break the door,I was just shivering out of fear of the dream(nightmare) I had
"Am i talking to somebody?He shouted and i can sense anger in his voice,I was sweating as if someone poured me water,I ran and open the door.
Immediately he came inside he landed a slap✋🏿 on my left cheek,I felt on the ground holding my left cheek"Why didnt you open the door on time"he shouted at me
"Am sorry I I...,........"he landed another slap on my cheek again
"You see,you stammered because you want to lie,by the way i heard you calling a name i hate so much"
"What name is that? I asked to confirm my dream despite the fact that I am scared of him
"Hahaha Hahaha hahaha ,mama you are asking me?he was laughing and asking at the same time,I remembered the dream,the voice sounds like the voice in my dream
"I hate the name Jesus,cause we have nothing in common with him"he now said it
By the way,get your clothes ready we are going some where"with this he left.
I was still on the floor,I now have an idea,let me call our pastor,the one David is serving as a young apostle under.
Immediately I brought my phone 📱out to call the pastor,the door opened and I saw David standing and laughing like a horror
"What do you want to do?call Pastor right?to report me to him right?he asked still smiling
"How on earth do this guy know what am planning to do?I asked myself
"How on earth do this guy know what am planning to do?he repeated what i asked....to be continue...

20/09/2023

Married to a monster👹👹👹👺👺👹👹👹(part 2)

I managed to go to the kitchen prepare something for him,after I finished preparing the breakfast,I set everything on the dinning table and went to call him(I just pretended as if am not hurt by his actions.
I tip toed to parlour and caught him making a call
"Yes this is just the beginning,aswear she never see anything yet,I tell you i will make------------------"
Suddenly he saw me and hanged up the call..
"Hey for how long have you been here?he asked to be sure whether i overheard his discussion
"Am just coming now,just to inform you that breakfast is ready "I said with fear written all over my face

"Wow! baby oh! I mean mama,you mean my breakfast is ready?He was coming towards me with a devilish smiles😃😃😃😃😃,he came closer and even cuddled me with his other hand playing on my hair,I was enjoying it thinking he was possessed when I woke him up for morning devotion now maybe the demon has left,I was busy enjoying the warm of his arms around me suddenly he pulled my hair
"Uhhhhhshhh"I shouted in pains,now he turned the demon possessed face again and shouted at me
"This should be the last time you will badge into my privacy again without notice"he now let go of me,I ran back to the room panting like a deer panting for water
"God is this a dream?my dream of becoming a mama is now aborted and shattered,look at the way I denied bro Chris,there is nothing that Chris haven't done for me,that gut support everything i do,he is also committed but not like Apostle David,he doesn't speak in tongue,he doesn't carry fire i wonder whether he is possessing an orthodox mindset,he is rich but am not after his wealth but i love anointing,fame,power and men that speaks in tongues,I cant turn down an Apostle's proposal because of someone that can't speak in tongue...
What have I done to myself?the love of becoming a mama has ruined me,it has let me into hell and my husband happens to be a devil and a monster?👹👹👺👺

To be continue... ✍️✍️

20/09/2023

Title: Married to a monster👹👹😈 (Part 1)
Wow i cant believe that am now married👰🤵 to the love of my life,do u know how the feeling of getting married to a minister is ?i will be called "mama",the guy is just wow,cutie,lovely and holy ghost filled(he can rap in tongues not just pray😃😃)..
It have been my desire to see that people call me mama,am sure that i have a calling in my life and i need a supporter and am lucky to find apostle david,he is just an answered prayer.
Everybody in the fellowship loves,respect apostle david and some even crush on him just like me🙈🙈,he is just every woman's dream not just spirit filled but handsome. the day he proposed i couldn't wait for him to finish his grammars before i said yes.
For almost a year that we started i will say david is a true minister,he spoils me with gift🎁🎁,outings and we prayed much and we studied the word together with him,one thing I loved about him is he supported my dreams of maintaining s*xual purity till marriage,he accept it that thats the best way to live A godly life.our relationship has been an example to a lot of people,we received a great counseling from great men of god,every thing was perfect until a day after our wedding.
The day after our wedding everything became a nightmare ,i woke him up for devotion he threw harsh words on me."Baby😍 lets pray🙏🏿"i said
"Are you mad?how dare you wake me up by this time?don't you have home training? In fact you are stupid"he rose from bed the with these words as if am a demon👹,immediately tears filled my eyes."hope am dreaming,my husband just insulted me"
"Will you get out of this room?in fact from today you will be sleeping in the guest room,i don't have any single feelings for you,hope you get that"
These are the last words he spoke before leaving the room,am yet to recover from this shock .

Precious Chinwe Nwamadu ✍🏿✍🏿✍🏿✍🏿

20/09/2023

😆😆😆
So I remember the day I took 2nd position in the class. My father was so happy that he told me not to wash his clothes for two weeks. He told me to rest and play as I like. During that period I was a king in the house. Two weeks of not washing clothes.

My mother suspended me from the kitchen for only two days. She said I could watch television while she cooks alone in the kitchen.

After two days I resumed work.

That one didn't pain me like my father's break.

After two weeks my father went inside and brought out a bunch of clothes for me to wash. Jeans o. Khaki o. Complete two weeks unwashed clothes. He soaked them in water and called me.

"Ehen Chidera, Break is over. Come and wash these clothes. I don't have clothes to wear next week."

The next term I took 1st position. My father was super excited. He told me to rest for three weeks. He said I can make it one month if I want to.

Chap.

I told him I was full of strength and energy and that he shouldn't worry about me. I am fine. I don't want celebration again.

My name is Precious Chinwe Nwamadu and I am the best at what I do.

20/09/2023

My boss and I
chapter 3

I told my boss, if you don't want anyone to see our s*x video come to my house again after close of work.

we continue our affair till like 8months

I notice my boss isn't focus on the job like before,
I assured him, as long as he's satisfying me our secret will be safe forever,
my boss isn't just comfortable knowing his video is in my hand.
I kept on manipulating him,
we began having s*x in the office at any given opportunity.

Deep down in my heart, I never intended to leak our s*x video because my personality is at stake.

gradually my boss began to fall into depression, he couldn't satisfy me any longer, I felt I've done more harm than good being his personal Assistance.

I decided to delete the videos for his own sanity,
meanwhile, he have already reported himself to his wife about the secret affair and our s*x video
I never imagined he'll open up to his wife about what we were doing
my boss wife called me on phone, she threaten to sue me for trying to blackmail her husband.

I try not to get intimidated by her call....
what nonsense, who is she to threaten me

one weekend his wife storm my house
I heard a knock at my apartment, I open the door to my greatest surprised It was Nkechi and 2 policemen standing

Nkechi was so surprised seeing me
one police officer ask if am Deborah
I said yes
Nkechi asked... are u the one trying to blackmail my husband
I was stuttering

Nkechi and I have been good friends way back till we lost contact, I never knew Nkechi's husband was my Boss
I felt So sorry and so ashamed of myself.
Nkechi was still mad at me.
base on our conversation that we were long time friends, the police was waiting for her to give the order for my arrest

Nkechi saw I was sincerely sorry, she ask the officer to stand down that we can settle this amicably.
I welcome them inside,
I told her I've already deleted the video and the policemen gave me warning of my life.

I called my boss, I tendered my apologies and the following week I resign from the job

I've gone back to the labour market again, the job hunt continue
I regretted everything I did to my Boss and his family even to the organization

am still in search of a job, if you have any please contact me

the end

Precious Chinwe..✍️✍️

19/09/2023

my boss and I
chapter 2

my boss and I started kissing.......
I snapped out from the kiss, he tried to kiss me again I was too weak to reject him and we made love through out that day

we checked out from the hotel and we travel back to Lagos, our company celebrate us again

my boss actually made my work look much more easier
he's an understanding person
he's married to a beautiful wife and he's blessed with 3 children,

gradually I started fallen in love with my boss🤦

after the s*x in that hotel, he never acted like we did something,
I can't just get that sweet memories off my head, I have always dreamt of his touch again but he won't notice me,

he's so focus when it comes to work, I guess am losing my senses
one day after close of work I delibrately miss the staff bus so I could convince him drop me at my house which he did,
I invited him inside,
he said he was in a hurry to go home
I insisted,
he sluggishly followed me inside, I offer him a glass of water as I try to seduce him.
he said what happen at the hotel in Abuja was a mistake, that he was under the influence of alcohol and it won't happen again.

I've tried all means to have him again but he left my apartment in anger
the following day I sent a message to the HR and copy my boss that I was sick and I will miss work for some days.
I beg my room mate to help me call my boss directly that I needed to see him.
after close of work my boss came over again, my room mate had already left the house, now it's just us left alone,
I beg for his touch and kisses,
I even threatening him with sucide
he turn me down again, I began to cry to see if it'll work but it fail.

I was looking for all means to make us have s*x again

when I resume work, I ask him if I wasn't beautiful enough
he laughed
I said if he doesn't make love to me right there in his office, I'll accuse him of r**e, which I'll involve the HR and also his wife.

this sparked him standing up from his seat.
what do you mean he asked...

I walked away and slam his door.

He came over to my office asking what's exactly was my problem
I replied; make love to me again at least for the second and last time

He look at me
I frowned
I said in a command tune " you're following me to my house today "

he was mute
after close of work, he followed me home, I beg him let's recreate exact same scenario at the hotel, I brought out a bottle of champagne, I seduced him a little and he fell for my game, this time around I've gotten a hidden camera somewhere

I just don't know why I wanted him all for myself, my boss is just so good when it comes to satisfying me, I guess his wife is so lucky to have a man like him
now I've my boss right where I wanted him,
I forwarded the video to him

he was shocked, begging me to delete the video

I replied, if you don't want anyone to see this video come to my house again after close of work.
........to be continue.

19/09/2023

my Boss and I

After the completion of my NYSC I hit the labour market real hard with plenty of my CV's from street to street, from one organization to another

it's almost a year searching for a job, I finally got an email for an interview for the role of a personal Assistant, I was so excited, at least my hook is about to catch a fish, I was all set and ready for the interview, the company needed a female for gender balancing,

I prepared well because my life depends on it, and it's time I leave the labour market and say good bye to job hunt

the interview came and gone
I got a call from the company, that I met all the requirements

I've been hired... I rolled on the floor 7 times, I even gave testimonies

the job description includes, I've to travel with my boss, schedule meetings and so on

I resume work immediately, the following Monday and there's an already scheduled meeting in Abuja, automatically am traveling with my boss, the reservation made earlier was for one person,
we arrive Abuja, we order a shuttle to the hotel, we check in with hope there will be another room I can book for myself
unfortunately all rooms are fully booked
I suggest I go find a cheaper hotel near by, but my boss insisted he doesn't want his P. A too far away from him just incase, afterall the company booked a suite for him. there's plenty rooms for everyone

I agreed, there's enough room to sleep,
through out the travels he have asked me some personal questions, he's just getting to know me and we indeed got along,
it was time to sleep and everyone took to their bed

it's like I was born to be his P. A because we are so getting along and he likes me.

we had an indecisive meeting with our clients and we are to continue the following day

it was past 11pm when it began to rain heavily and I've this phobia for thunder that I was so scared and I couldn't sleep,
my loud voice woke him up, he came to my bed and held me so closely, we never knew when we slept off in each others arms.

it's another day with our clients and we woke up together on same bed, I was apologising for making him come sleep over at my bed, he acted like it's nothing

it's was successful meeting with our clients and am doing well already as a personal Assistant and our client agreed to invest 30M naira with our company.

my boss was so excited, that he decided to have little celebration in our hotel room with champagne, music and dancing

I was a bit tipsy, when I missed my step and fell, my boss rushed to pick me up, that's how we glued, staring at each other.

we started kissing.......
I snapped out from the kiss, he tried to kiss me again and I.....
.....to be continue

19/09/2023

My biggest regret 1🥺🤧

Before leaving home for lectures i came across this cute guy on facebook .I texted and he immediately replied me,i was so happy to the extent of imagining a life between both of us which never existed.

So he suggested we get to meet each other ,so i told him "i don't go out" but then due to i already liked him i said "okay I'll meet you on my way back from school".

Before then he told me that he has a girlfriend but she wasn't in town,but i paid a deaf ear to that.

The day we met he paid my transport ,bought me food which i didn't eat because I feared him added something 😅 and we stayed in his house chatting, laughing, he made me feel extremely comfortable .
Then he asked "are you a virgin" i said yes so we continued our discussion .
When it was time for me to leave ,i left and we still continued chatting online.

The following day I asked him if he was free and he immediately replied yes but this didn't end well for me . I reached feeling all relaxed and comfortable so he said he was feeling h***y ,i was so surprised because we weren't dating and it's something I've never done before .But due to i liked him i stupidly accepted and that was it.
I didn't bleed but I felt an unbearable pain in tummy which didn't allow me walk properly.

he had an urgent call ,so he left the house leaving there alone .I was so angry at myself that I've betrayed the promise I made to my mum, alot of thought went through my head ,i cried ehh💔.

After an hour when I thought I was a little bit stable i called him and told him that I'm about leaving,so he immediately rushed bk to see me off.

I do take a public transport (bus) going home but to my greatest surprise i was bleeding , people in the bus began panicking I tried calling his line but it wasn't going through.I had to bear it till I reached home .
Luckily for me ,no one was home .
To be continued....

19/09/2023

Few years while I was resting at home, this unknown number called.

I picked up the call, and to my greatest surprise it was my secondary school mate Sarah.

Its been 3 years since I last saw nor spoke to Sarah.

We greeted and chatted for a little while before she told me the purpose of her calling.

She told me that her younger brother was in
Jos for an exam and screening, and I was the only one she could think of to accommodate him; that he doesn't know anyone or where to stay.

Sarah was my gee back then in secondary school, I told her that wasn't going to be a problem.

I asked her the park where I would see her brother, she directed me and gave me his phone number.

I was really happy hearing her voice and I promised to catch up with her later.

After the call with Sarah.

I had to call his brother but his line wasn't connecting.

I tried several times, but his line was switched off.

I wanted calling sarah again to tell her about the issue at hand, but then her call came in again.

Have you tried his number? Sarah asked me.

I was about calling you. its not reachable. I replied.

Don't get angry, maybe his phone is off or network issues, I believe he will charge it when he gets down the park. I told him he will be staying with you. Sarah said.

After the call, I had to wait till evening, because Sarah earlier told me his bus might reach in the evening.

In other not to disappoint Sarah.

I quickly went to the park after I was done with lectures to wait for Sarah's brother.

Around 7:23pm; a bus arrived at the park.

Again I tried calling the number and luckily, this time, Sarah's brother phone rang.

He was coming down from the bus, when he picked the call, and I waved at him.

He looked surprised.

I remembered his Junior brother, he was also my junior back then in secondary school.

He looked surprised seeing me..

Senior ayochidi.. He called..

Ike, howfa. I have been trying your line since, what happened? I asked him

My phone went low, I just switched it on now, to tell my parents I was already in jos. Are you waiting for some one here? ike asked me.

Your sister, sarah told me to wait for you, that you were coming for screening. I told him.

Sarah? ike asked me surprised.

Yes. Sarah, where Is your bag, let me take you to my house. I told ike.

Senior, ayochidi wait wait. ike said..

Sarah called you? he asked me again.

Why are you sounding surprised. is sarah not your sister again? I asked ike.

Sarah died and was Buried a month ago. Ike said..

I felt shock move down my body.

I picked up my phone to check the unknown number and discovered the number was no longer in my phone.

At that moment I realized I picked a call from a ghøst.

In as much as I got freåked out.

But that wasn't even the point, the point was that even at dèåth, sarah still cared about the welfare of his younger brother.

Through out his exams and screening; ike stayed with me.

17/09/2023

Igbo kwenu!!!
An Igbo man opened a brand new zoo and made the entry fee #5000, nobody came. He reduced it to #2500 but still, nobody came. Then #2000...and then #1000, but still empty.

So he made it free and the zoo was filled in no time. Then, the man released the lion and made the exit fee #20,000. 😂😂😂

Don't joke with Igbos

10/09/2023

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Precious chinwe jokes

10/09/2023

😂😂😂LAUGH OO
Back in secondary school , I was very p00r in maths.
During exams, I’d get between 2% and 8% . The results used to
be announced sequentially, that is from the lowest to the highest
marks. So I would always be the first or second to be called out
and flogged.
One day, the maths results were announced and my name
wasn’t among the first to be called out.
The teacher got to 30%, 40%, 50%, 60% and 70%, still my paper
had not been called out.
Everyone in the class kept looking at me asking,
“FAO what’s up? How did you pass this exam?”
i smile and said ... "Well, na God o"
By the time the teacher got to 80%, I was already grinning in
excitement.
When he got to 90%, he had only one paper remaining. I then
asked myself , could I have scored 90% in maths ? I was feeling
very anxious and happy now. It was obvious my dreams and
prayers have
been answered.
The whole class was amazed as everyone kept looking at me. It
was unbelievable.
Finally the teacher looked up and said ,.......
one id!ot did not write his name on his paper and he scored 0%.
I just fainteed...........
Nobody should wake me ooooo
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Precious chinwe jokes

10/09/2023

MY LAST FIGHT WITH A PARTICULAR GIRL.

A new girl called Ekaette joined our class in JSS3.

She was a tall, dark beauty from Akwa Ibom state.

She sat behind me in class as I tried all means to get her attention but it never seemed that I existed.

I developed hatred for her as I thought being a bully would make her notice me.

One Monday morning, Ekaette went outside to get meat pie, as she was coming back into the school through the second gate, I bumped into her, intentionally hitting away her meat pie into the mud.

She looked at me, smiled and left.

"Wow, what a sweet girl to bully" I said to myself.

You know am always smart

I once punched her stomach for mistakenly stepping on me. She cried but I never felt any remorse.

It dawned on me on a Friday afternoon. Ekaette was holding a 200 Naira note and was trying to put it inside her purse, then I grabbed her hand and tore the money.

Waaaaam!!! A destiny changing slap landed on my left eye. Her palm was like a leather belt. I was immediately held by my friends.

"Ekaette leave am abeg" my friends murmured.

I was so angry and swore " Anybody wey hold me go fail em WAEC!"

Fear gripped my friends and I was left alone.

I approached her in anger but she immediately held my neck strangling me half way to death.

Three consecutive blows landed on my lips as I hit my head against the wall.

I tried fighting back but this village beast was too strong.

I looked at my class captain and said in a weak tone: " Better come and separate before I kill her "

Without hesitation, he came close to separate us, but Ekaette offered me the last slap that triggered silence throughout the whole class for about 4 minutes.

I was dizzy and almost seeing blank. I only heard " Yeeeeehh! This one enter!"

I regained consciousness and looked at her with tears in my eyes.

I managed a smile and said " E no pain me.
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chinwe jokes

30/08/2023

I have the video
Follow my page for the full video

26/08/2022