07/09/2024
There's nothing new under the sun,what ever is happening now has happened before. The only difference could be the form or scope,but it has happened. It's either you have not heard or read about it,but it's not new,
Why is it also said that you do not need to reinvent the wheel? It's because the wheel has been invented so just remodel and touch up. That's also what life has taught or proved to us.
When we were much younger, ( I am comfortable sitting on the elders' table and welcoming freshers) domestic violence was mostly perpetrated on women and children. In the case of the woman,the husband could beat ( actually flog with two piece koboko,specially meant for her) and chase her down the street in her undies.with their children crying and running after daddy to stop.
As children,we actually never got to know the reason for the beating. Or you just know these children whose parents were regularly fighting and telling each other unkind and hurtful words.
One of the early experiences I had, growing up,was one of my mother's apprentices who was a very beautiful, fair complexion lady from a state in the middle belt,whose short,black and ugly husband gave her the beating of her life,and threatened to disfigure her face. What was her offence ? She dared capture memories by taking photographs with compound people, including a bachelor,because her family had been transferred. Kai! She of course went to her madam( my mum) to help ask my father to intervene. When my parents arrived at their home,a fresh argument ensued and the jealous husband picked their framed family photo( people of my generation know that picture frames were wood,glass and nails) and flung it ,targeting the wife's face😳. My mother on impulse,put out her hand and the frame hit her hand and crashed.😳😳😳I have never seen a hand (from her wrist)shake so uncontrollably.. Na there settlement stop o ,Oh. was my father angry?the couple reconciled by themselves after that act .😀😀😀 . My mother was rushed to the hospital and the husband and wife came together to our house to apologize. Oh, my father gave it to him.We were peeping through the glass door to see the man crying and begging. He had been humbled . I never saw them again.
A more bizarre one I witnessed was as a full grown adult. In this case,it was the wife that was violent. A lecturer in a university who regularly harrassed her husband , hitting him with things. Chai! Sometimes the man had a swollen face,some mark on his body or neck,na madam do am o. The day he opened up to tell me what was happening in his house,I had goose bumps.He was and is still a gentleman. It was so embarrassing to him that he could only tell his pastor and at a point even the pastor got tired of their matter and told him "do what your mind tells you". He moved out, got a new place and started afresh. I don't know if they are now divorced, but I know he now has a new family with grown up children.
The good thing about all the people in these stories is that no one died,but there was violence in different forms, and at different times. The story of the lady happened in the late 70s, and she stayed through it and raised her children. I met one of her children recently and he told me she passed away some years ago. The second experience was in the early 2000s, and the man is presently having the time of his life( I hope he doesn't see this😀). They are both lucky because not everyone comes out of it alive,in recent times we have seen or read of extreme cases of spouses snapping and committing murder,although those who know like to call it manslaughter🫣
In any case,domestic violence comes in different forms,which could be; physical,psychological ,economic or otherwise. Pls don't wait until you snap, ACT NOW!
Wetin no good,no good.
Pls let's be humane.
SAY NO TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE!
A Broadcaster/Storyteller and more
