Comedian Joe

21/12/2025

16/12/2025

Ronaldo fans will want to convince you — and make you believe — all of this at the same time 🤣

• Assists are useless… yet they cry every match that Ronaldo’s teammates don’t pass him the ball to score.

• Ronaldo’s assist numbers are “reduced”, but he can go two months playing matches without providing a single assist — and somehow that’s normal.

• Scoring in the Saudi Pro League is much harder than scoring in La Liga 🤣🤣

• “Pre-assist” was supposedly invented in the MLS solely because of Messi, and they claim those pre-assists are counted as actual assists — that’s why Messi’s assist numbers are “inflated”.

• Messi is called Eibarman because he scored many goals against Eibar.
Meanwhile, he has scored more goals against Madrid than against Eibar 🤣

• Ballon d’Or has “lost its credibility”… but they still desperately want their favorite players to win it.

• Ronaldo is “hated by the world” and the system is against him — yet they also claim he owns the streets.
Is the street not part of the world?

• Scoring a bicycle kick is better than winning a trophy.

• All MLS trophies are “unofficial”.
The only “official” ones are the trophies Messi hasn’t won 🤣

• The World Cup is just a 6–7 game tournament and Ronaldo doesn’t need it.
But somehow, they still dream of a World Cup final: Argentina vs Portugal, Ronaldo scoring a late winner to lift it.

• Scoring goals that don’t lead to any trophy is more important than actually winning trophies.

• Ronaldo is the “most complete player” because he can score with his right foot, left foot, head, shoulder, chest, knee… preek 🤣🤣🤣

The mental gymnastics never disappoint.

08/12/2025

🚨 PSG after beating Barca:
0-1 Monaco❌
1-2 Bayern ❌
1-1 Lille⛔️
3-3 Strasbourg⛔️

🚨 Real Madrid after beating Barca:
1-0 Liverpool❌
0-0 Rayo⛔️
2-2 Elche⛔️
1-1 Girona⛔️
0:2 celta Vigo

🚨 Chelsea after beating Barca:
1-1 Arsenal⛔️
3-1 Leeds❌
0-0 Bournemouth⛔️

Beating Barcelona is a curse. Avoid them! 🤯

02/12/2025

Dear Madrid fans who are you supporting tonight?

27/11/2025

All of una wey dey tok say make Liverpool sack Arne Slot dey w!cked oo.

How una want make dem sack bread winner now wey Christmas na next week..

This man get family to feed and e get people wey their Christmas rice dey hin hand..

Put yourself in Arne Slot shoe, if na you people dey pray make dem sack for your work how you go feel?

Make una leave 12+12= 24 hours losing for me abeg..

26/11/2025

They keep trying to place another young talent next to Lamine Yamal, searching for someone who can match him. But they always fall short. Lamine is in a league of his own, and anyone they try to compare or put on his level eventually ends up beneath him.
They've tried name after name, hype after hype, yet here Lamine stands, delivering more goals and assists this season than Estevão, all while playing through a major injury. With less matches.
Nobody is saying that Estevão isn't talented, but calling Lamine "You're just the sh*t Estevão" makes me giggle. 🔥

25/11/2025

The German tactician

24/11/2025

Messi has now equalled Puskas 404 assists

Now let’s wait for Ronaldo to equal Pele’s 1,279 goals 😌😂😂

17/11/2025

For the first time in 3 years, Barcelona will play an official football match in the Spotify Camp Nou.

The stadium will have the opportunity to host 45, 000 spectators, and it's expected that all the tickets will be sold out.

Before the year runs out, it'll be allowed to hos 60, 000 spectators and by November 2026, the intended 105, 000 capacity will be fully activated, which will be the biggest in Europe.

Culers, our lovely club is recovering its identity, and on Saturday, Athletic Bilbao will be the first team to taste the meal.

How excited are you, Culers? ❤️💙

17/11/2025

I got over 100 reactions on one of my posts last week! Thanks everyone for your support! 🎉

15/11/2025

Chelsea at Stamford Bridge might actually be the first time this trio starts together this season.

They don't know what's about to hit them. 😴 😂

13/11/2025

🚨🇰🇵 North Korea will finally show Premier League football… but only after turning it into their own version of the sport.

Kim Jong-un has agreed to broadcast matches under some wild conditions:

👉 No live games. Every match will be re-edited before airing.
👉 Matches cut to just 60 minutes. A trimmed-down Premier League.
👉 All English text covered. Stadium boards replaced with North Korean graphics.
👉 South Korean players completely removed.
• Kim Ji-soo (Brentford)
• Hwang Hee-chan (Wolves)
👉 Any LGBTQ+ symbols instantly edited out.

A Premier League like you’ve never seen… North Korean edition.