Farewell stage fright (2024)

12/05/2023

Another Friday to learn how to make communication efficient, and, why not, more appealing too. Today we talk about the rhetorical device "allusion".

An allusion is a rhetorical device that writers and speakers use to reference well-known people, places, events, or literary works in their writing/speaking. By doing so, the communicator aims to create a mental connection between the reader and the alluded source, often to evoke an emotional response or to reinforce an argument.

Allusion comes in many forms, from direct to indirect, and from historical to mythological. Some of the most famous examples of allusion in the literature include Shakespeare’s references to Greek mythology in his plays, T.S. Eliot’s use of the biblical story of the Fisher King in “The Waste Land,” and F. Scott Fitzgerald’s allusion to the Greek myth of Icarus in “The Great Gatsby.”

"But how would referencing a Greek god help me become an engaging communicator?". Simple. Allusion allows one to tap into a reader’s existing knowledge and associations. By referencing something familiar, you can create a sense of shared experience and understanding, making the message more persuasive and memorable for the receiver.

Here's the caveat: allusion can also be a tricky device to master. Overuse of allusion can make you sound confused, unclear, or even a bit snobbish, so do not exaggerate the number of allusions you plan to put in your speech or writing. And pick the right ones: the point of this rhetorical device is to create a connection with the audience, so do remember that readers have to be familiar with the referenced source. A good communicator will strike a balance between being too obscure and being too obvious. By referencing well-known people, places, events, or literary works, you can create a sense of shared experience and understanding with your audience.

10/05/2023

Wednesday is a great day to take a break mid-week and breathe.

Sit in an upright and comfortable position, put your earphones on, and set a 1 or 2-minute timer.
Try to follow this pattern:
🔹Inhale for 4 counts
🔹Retain your breath for 2 counts
🔹Exhale for 6 counts
If retaining your breath makes you feel anxious, just Inhale and exhale.

Close your eyes if you wish.
Enjoy your breathing break.

08/05/2023

Let's get to a topic that it's dear to my heart and, if you are somewhat of an introvert and/or neurodivergent, I'm sure you will appreciate it: small talk. How much do we hate small talk on a scale from 1 to 10? It's about 12 for me. Boring, useless, and time-consuming, that's what I think about small talk. I don't even consider it communication, it's closer to a general assessment of mutual non-aggression. What we are actually saying with small talk is "I will not embarrass you, I expose you, this conversation is going to be plain, dull and you don't have to fear me. Please do the same for me."

But how to break the wall of small communication without embarrassment? Without breaking that safety net of exchanging opinions about the weather? The answer is... a question. But, not any question: some questions have special powers. Which ones? i'll give you a few:

🔸Ask "How are you today?", and then to the answer "Good" or "fine, reply with "What makes today a good day?"
🔸After asking what people do for a living, which is a plain question, ask them what they love about their job, or when they decided they wanted to be what they have become
🔸After asking "Where are you from", instead of letting the conversation drop, ask what they like about their hometown.

As a coach, learning how to ask questions without making it feel like a third grade, is crucial, and I learned that people love to open up when guided correctly and feel comfortable. Moreover, killing small talk with a significant question it's a good way to create real connections, make a meaningful impression, and, sometimes, build trust with the other person. This will make a deep change in your relationships, whether you use this tip in your personal or professional life. Or both.

05/05/2023

Another post exploring the art to write great speeches and understand others better: what are rhetoric's famous 3 pillars? Pathos, Logos, and Ethos. Yeah, they are a little bit like the three Mosquttieres, but these ones are sharper.

Each one of them appeals to some part of our feeling and understanding: pathos appeals to emotions, logos appeals to logic, and ethos appeals to credibility. The Greeks knew what they were doing, they used to say that a good, persuasive speech, needs to have a good mix of all these flavors.

Pathos is used to evoke feelings in the audience, such as empathy, sympathy, and compassion. Advertisements often use pathos to sell products by creating an emotional connection with the consumer. In fact, the use of particularly emotional storylines will move the audience toward the object of interest.

Logos uses logical reasoning and evidence to persuade. This mode of persuasion is often used in debates and academic writing. Logos can be used to present data, statistics, and expert opinions to support an argument.

Ethos appeals to the credibility of the speaker or writer. It relies on the reputation and expertise of the person presenting the argument. For example, a doctor speaking about the benefits of a particular medication may be more persuasive than a non-medical professional.

Next time you are exposed to a good ted talk, a brilliant presentation, or convincing copy, check how these elements were mixed: great writers/speakers make it virtually impossible to separate the three!

03/05/2023

There are many reasons why I think mindfulness is a marvelous tool: practicing mindfulness makes every aspect of your life a bit better and easier. Communication is probably the best field for mindfulness practice, starting from the concept of non judgment.

Non-judgment is a key aspect of mindfulness practice. It involves observing your thoughts, feelings, and experiences without attaching any judgments or labels to them. Rather than evaluating your experiences as good or bad, right or wrong, you simply observe them as they are, without trying to change or fix them.

What are the benefits of a non-judgemental conversation?

When you practice non-judgment, you can cultivate a greater sense of self-awareness and acceptance. You become more attuned to your thoughts and emotions, and better equipped to respond to them in a healthy way. You also become less reactive to external events, allowing you to approach challenges with greater clarity and equanimity. These prerequisites make a great listener out of you: one that will take everything that has been said in a neutral manner and that will have time, energy, and lucidity to answer calmly and firmly.

02/05/2023

If you're interested in personal development, you may have heard of PNL or neuro-linguistic programming. PNL is a set of techniques and principles that help people improve their communication, behavior, and thinking patterns. In this blog post, we'll explore what PNL is, how it works, and how it can benefit you.

PNL is based on the idea that our thoughts, emotions, and behavior are interconnected and influence each other. PNL was developed in the 1970s by Richard Bandler and John Grinder, who studied successful therapists and communicators to understand how they achieved their results. They discovered that people have patterns of thinking, feeling, and behavior that can be modeled and replicated. By understanding and changing these patterns, people can improve their lives and achieve their goals. By changing our thoughts and language, we can change how we feel and act. PNL techniques include visualization, anchoring, reframing, and rapport-building.

PNL works by helping people become aware of their current patterns of thinking, feeling, and behavior, and then guiding them to make changes that lead to better outcomes. For example, if someone has a fear of public speaking, a PNL practitioner might help them visualize themselves giving a successful speech, anchor positive feelings to that image, and reframe their negative beliefs about public speaking.

20/04/2023

Here we are for another insight into the world of rhetorical devices we can use to write a better speech. Today's figure of speech is anaphora.

Anaphora is a rhetorical device that involves the repetition of a word or phrase at the beginning of successive clauses or sentences. This technique is commonly used in speeches to emphasize a particular point or idea and to create a memorable and impactful message. Anaphora can be used to build momentum and create a sense of urgency or importance, as well as to create a sense of unity and cohesion within a speech. To use anaphora effectively in a speech, it is important to choose a word or phrase that is relevant to the topic and that has a strong emotional impact on the audience.

For instance, here's an example of anaphora from Winston Churchill's famous speech "We Shall Fight on the Beaches": "We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender." In this example, Churchill repeats the phrase "We shall fight" at the beginning of each successive clause to emphasize his determination to resist the enemy.

19/04/2023

I'm always a bit hesitant when it comes to suggesting gestures to help enhance a speech's power. There is a fine line between the right amount of gestures and too much. On top of that gesture is a tricky topic. there are cultural differences to consider when you face an international audience. But there are a few things we can choose to implement safely in our speech performance to engage the audience on a visual level:

✔ Numbers: helping your audience visualize how many concepts or options you present by counting with your hands is a powerful tool to keep the flow of thoughts clear and the audience engaged
✔ Show the levels and dimensions, distinguishing by importance, value, etc. If something is more relevant it's usually higher in the visual frame, if it has less value it sits lower.
✔ The split: you can split two different topics into your two hands to help visualize them while you explain the pros and cons, for example; or two different locations or actions to compare

And remember, Any gesture should be coherent with what you say, and clear, to make your speech efective.

18/04/2023

Let's talk about nonverbal signs.
There are several nonverbal signs you should notice when talking to a person, including their facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice. Facial expressions can tell you a lot about a person's emotions, such as whether they are happy or sad, while body language can indicate their level of comfort, interest, or engagement in the conversation. For instance, here are a few signs of interest that you can catch from your listener or that you want to show when you want to communicate your engagement in the conversation.
✅ Smile; smiling is always a sign of attention and appreciation, especially combined with nodding
✅ Eye contact is a good way to show interest, even though too much eye contact might be intimidating; eye contact and a smile is generally a sign of attention and encouragement
✅ An open posture is a sign of a receptive attitude; signs of attentive listening is leaning forward or, if sitting, sideways; even tilting the head on the side or placing it on the hand may be a good sign of paying attention
✅ Mirroring the speaker's facial expression usually is a sign of attention, but this may largely depend on the listener's general attitude.

17/04/2023

The concept of persuasion has been studied and written about by many scholars throughout history. What is persuasion? It is the act of convincing someone to believe or do something through reasoning or argument. It is a powerful tool used in communication, advertising, and marketing to influence people's beliefs, attitudes, and behavior.

One of the most influential works on persuasion is Aristotle's "Rhetoric," in which he explores the art of persuasion and its three main forms: logos (logical appeal), ethos (ethical appeal), and pathos (emotional appeal). Other notable works on persuasion include Robert Cialdini's "Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion" and Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People." But the list goes on.

How does it work? Well, persuasion often involves appealing to emotions, using logic and reasoning, and providing evidence to support a particular point of view. It can be used for both positive and negative purposes, and it is important to be aware of its potential impact and ethical implications. I think knowing this technique it's not just useful to apply as speakers but for listeners as well. We are bombarded by persuasive copy, ads, and marketing all day every day. knowing the techniques used will help us be better speakers and smater listeners.

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13/04/2023

Let's start a little journey into rhetoric with this first rhetoric figure: analogy.

An analogy is a rhetorical figure of speech that is used to compare two things that are otherwise dissimilar, in order to explain or clarify a complex idea. Analogies are often used to make abstract or complex concepts more concrete and easier to understand. To use an analogy, you would first identify the concept or idea you want to explain, and then think of a comparison that would help your audience understand it better. For example, if you were trying to explain the concept of an ecosystem, you might use the analogy of a puzzle. Just as a puzzle is made up of many interlocking pieces, an ecosystem is made up of many different organisms, each of which plays a role in the larger system.

Analogies can be a powerful tool for communication, but it's important to use them carefully and appropriately. Make sure your analogy is relevant to your audience and doesn't distract from the main point you're trying to make. One famous example is Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech, in which he used the analogy of a check to illustrate the unfulfilled promises of equality for African Americans. He said, "We have come to cash this check, a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice." By comparing the struggle for civil rights to a financial transaction, King made the concept of equality more concrete and relatable to his audience.

12/04/2023

Many people I know have a real problem dealing with their voices. Most of the time people ask me how to improve their voice, the tone, the timber, and how to have "a better voice". I think what people really need is a better relationship with their voice. At very early ages, almost every one of us has been told to "lower your voice", to "shut up" or "stop shouting". Some of us, in an attempt to get creative, have been told to "never sing again", "that "your voice is awful" or that "you should never do it again".
Awful, isn't it? But... not true. I particularly hate when people limit other people's voice use this way. So... let's improve our relationship with our voice in 5 steps.

✅Start treating it like a separate entity. Give it a name and have conversations with it, just like you would with a friend. And if your voice doesn't cooperate, just remember: it's not you, it's the vocal cords.
✅Listen to cartoon voice actors and playfully imitate their tones
✅Read out loud for 2 minutes a day. Possibly fairytales or fantasy books filled with characters that you can voice exploring all the nuances your voice has.
✅Once you feel a bit more confident, record yourself while reading, and then listen to the recording
✅Once you have grown accustomed to listening to your voice, take notes on what you want to improve. Use a non-judgemental speech while taking notes and never ever talk about yourself: "I'm annoying", "I'm too loud", "I'm too quiet" and "I have a bad voice" are not helpful considerations. "This voice is too loud for the context", "the voice of this character should be softer", and "This tone is not effective for this scene" are sentences that help you change your dialogue with your voice and work efficiently and effectively.

11/04/2023

Welcome back to work, did you have a good time during your Easter holidays?

To start this week with a nice step forward, here are 5 tips that could help you improve your communication skills in the office:

✔Listen actively: pay attention to what others are saying and try to understand their perspective.
✔Be clear and concise, using simple language and avoiding jargon.
✔Use appropriate body language, eye contact, and facial expressions to convey your message effectively.
✔Practice empathy: try to put yourself in other people's shoes and understand their feelings and needs.
✔Don't be afraid to ask questions if you don't understand something or need clarification. This can help avoid misunderstandings and improve communication overall.

Looks easy, doesn't it? Well, it might be less easy than it sounds. That's why I built this project. Keep following and take a look at https://mailchi.mp/588198a77804/farewell-stage-fright

07/04/2023

I know a lot of people talk about it, so let's clarify a few things here... what is visualization and why do we use it in mindfulness practices?

Visualization is a technique used to help focus your mind and improve your performance. It involves picturing yourself in a situation or performing a task, and creating a positive outcome. By doing so, we stop focusing on the negative outcome our mind is trying to create for us. But even more than visualizing the outcome (which can be a slippery slope), we should focus on task visualization. Step by step, with meticulous attention, we mentally repeat all the actions we are about to do, the movements, the words we say, the intentions behind them, warming up the procedural memory and getting ready for the performance. Meanwhile, we stop concentrating on the outcome or the audience reaction, an element of our performance that we have no control over , and start concentrating on the task. Once we approach the task after a full visualization, we will be more present at the moment of the ex*****on.

Visualization can help to reduce stress and anxiety, boost confidence, and increase focus and concentration. It can help to enhance performance by helping to calm the nerves, increase confidence, and improve focus and concentration.

05/04/2023

Stage presence is the ability to connect with an audience and convey confidence and charisma when speaking in public. It is important in life because it helps you to effectively communicate your ideas and connect with others. Having a strong stage presence can help you to be more persuasive, stand out among your peers, and make a positive impression on others. Improving your stage presence will require time and practice but you can start with a few exercises.

First, find your center. Open your feet hip-width and feel where you place your weight. Play with it and then place your weight center forward. Doing this will help you feel (and look) active in the conversation and engagement. Avoid placing your weight only on one hip, or moving around with your feet.

Don't lock your knees. Knees locked will create tension in your entire body.

Use some gestures to enhance your speech's impact but not too many. Gestures should always be coherent with what you are saying and clear for your audience.

Finally, remember that the more you use your body the more you learn about it, so take a walk, run, go to the gym, do yoga, pilates, and swimming.. any physical activity will get you more control over your body so that you will not just look more confident in it, you will be.

04/04/2023

A vocal warm-up is an exercise that helps to improve the clarity and quality of your voice. And no, it's not just for actors and singers, is for (or it should be for) anybody who uses his voice as a part of their profession. That means teachers and salespeople too, for instance.

A simple vocal warm-up exercise that anyone can do before a presentation is to hum for a few minutes. Humming helps to loosen your throat muscles, relax your vocal cords, and warm up your voice, especially if you do it chewing imaginary chewing gum. Other vocal warm-up exercises include lip trills and tongue trills. Try not to burst the trill, but to start and finish softly and move through your vocal extension. Go from a high-pitched note to a low one and reverse. If doing these exercises you accumulate any tension, relax it, breathe out, move the head, massage the face, and start again.

often underseen, a tongue twister is a good warm-up for your facial muscles and your tongue, it will help improve your articulation, and the clarity of your speech. Moreover, a tongue twister is a good way to keep your mind engaged and escape the stage fright trap.

03/04/2023

Happy new week! Surely this week will be filled with presentations and meetings, so let me give you 5 tips to make sure your presentation hits the spot.

1. Know your audience: understand who your audience is, what they want to know, and what they need in order to be convinced.

2. Structure your presentation in a way that makes it easy to follow and logically flows from point to point. Start with an introduction, that should provide an overview of the main points and grab the audience's attention. The body should be divided into sections; each section is focused on one main point and provide evidence to support your arguments. The conclusion then summarizes the main points and provides a call to action (if needed).

3. Use language that is clear and concise, but also engaging and interesting. adapt your language to your audience, use short sentences, and avoid long-winded explanations.

4. Use relevant examples to illustrate your points and make them more convincing.

5. Incorporate visuals, such as images, graphs, and videos, to make your points more impactful.

01/04/2023

Box breathing is a simple breathing technique that involves breathing in, holding the breath, exhaling, and holding the breath again in a pattern that creates a "box" shape. This technique can be used to promote relaxation and reduce stress and anxiety. Here are the steps to practice box breathing:

✅Find a comfortable seated position with your back straight and your shoulders relaxed.
✅Breathe in through your nose for a count of 4, filling your lungs completely.
✅Hold your breath for a count of 4.
✅Exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of 4, completely emptying your lungs.
✅Hold your breath again for a count of 4.
✅Repeat the cycle of breathing (inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4) for several rounds, or until you feel more relaxed and centered.

Box breathing can be particularly effective in reducing anxiety because it creates a sense of control and focus, while also activating the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps to calm the body's stress response. By focusing on the counting and the rhythm of your breath, you can shift your attention away from anxious thoughts and sensations, and bring your mind and body into a more relaxed and centered state.

This technique can be practiced anytime, anywhere, and can be particularly helpful during times of high stress or anxiety. With regular practice, you can learn to use box breathing as a tool to manage your anxiety and promote greater calm and relaxation in your daily life.

31/03/2023

Let's talk about positive self-talk.

Positive self-talk is a mindfulness practice that involves cultivating positive, supportive, and empowering thoughts and beliefs about oneself. It involves paying attention to the internal dialogue that runs through our minds and intentionally choosing to shift negative or self-critical thoughts to more positive and self-affirming ones.

Positive self-talk can take many forms, such as repeating affirmations, visualizing success, or simply reframing negative thoughts into more positive ones. For example, if you find yourself thinking "I can't do this," you might shift to a more positive self-talk phrase like "I am capable and competent, and I can do this."

The purpose of positive self-talk is to foster a more compassionate and supportive inner dialogue, which can help to reduce negative self-judgment and increase self-esteem and confidence. By intentionally practicing positive self-talk, we can rewire our brain to focus on our strengths and capabilities, rather than our shortcomings and limitations.

Research has shown that positive self-talk can have a range of benefits, including reducing anxiety and stress, improving self-esteem and confidence, enhancing performance, and promoting overall well-being. By incorporating positive self-talk into your mindfulness practice, you can learn to cultivate a more positive and empowering relationship with yourself and experience greater joy, fulfillment, and success in all areas of your life.

If you haven't tried practicing positive affirmation yet, you may want to give it a try. Start with "I am safe. I am loved. I am supported."

30/03/2023

I often mention mindfulness as my favorite practice to improve performance and deal with stage fright. But what is mindfulness?

Mindfulness is a mental state of awareness that involves paying attention to the present moment, without judgment or distraction. It is a practice that involves being fully present and engaged in whatever you are doing, whether that is eating, walking, working, or just simply sitting and observing your thoughts and feelings.

Mindfulness is often associated with meditation and other contemplative practices, but it can also be practiced in everyday life. By focusing your attention on the present moment, you can become more aware of your thoughts and emotions, and develop greater insight and understanding into your inner experiences.

Some common techniques used to cultivate mindfulness include breath awareness, body scanning, and mindful movement. These practices involve paying attention to the sensations in your body, your breath, and your surroundings, and learning to observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment or reactivity.

Research has shown that practicing mindfulness can have a range of benefits, including reducing stress and anxiety, improving mood and emotional regulation, enhancing attention and concentration, and promoting greater self-awareness and self-compassion.

Farewell stage fright